Not sure if this is the right place to post this, but I'm a third year medical student at a low-tier academic USMD program. I am really interested in GI, and I have heard from others that if you want to pursue a competitive fellowship, that you should ideally try to match to an academic IM program that has an in-house fellowship program for the one you are pursuing.
Unfortunately, I have a really bad red-flag on my application, in that I was going through a lot of family problems when I was studying for STEP1. While I was passing on my practice exams with a solid margin, sadly I was like one or two points off from passing the exam according to the graph they showed me. Felt very horrible, but there's nothing I can change about it now. While I was able to recollect myself and pass on the second attempt, ultimately I still failed my first attempt, which will have a huge impact on the programs I am able to get into.
I don't know where else I should ask or who I can turn to now, but do I no longer have a shot at something like GI now? GI has routinely been my favorite subject throughout undergrad and medical school and the one I have always excelled the most in. I really enjoy the research in the field and honestly even if the compensation wasn't as great as it is, I would still want to pursue it because I really like the field that much. Most of the mentors I have come across as a student whom I have related to and respected the most have been gastroenterologists. But as I know, and everyone here knows, GI is the most competitive IM subspecialty to match...
I just feel so lost and empty, and I don't know if I should give up on this dream now...or if it's even still within reach for me. From what I've read online and heard from mentors, I essentially need to match to an academic IM program to have a shot, because out of a community program it is next to impossible (even with no red flags). And that's considering a community program will even want to have me, because nobody is failing STEP these days except for me I guess.
I have heard that most programs screen out applicants who don't pass STEP1 on the first attempt, so what can I even do at this point? If there is still a sliver of hope, would anyone be able to recommend some advice for me to follow from now until when I apply in 4th year? I just feel so lost right now - this is my only red flag but of course it's such a huge one.
I've gone through my life battling with failures...I failed multiple classes in high school in the final semester of senior year, but still got into a solid undergraduate program. I didn't really do well on the MCAT at all, retook it and did worse, but was able to find a US MD program to take me. And now I've failed yet again. I really don't want to give up because I've already messed up so much in my life and kept pushing forward because what other choice would I have? Please, if there's any way or avenues I can take to persist, I want to pursue those to the best of my ability. I just don't know what I should do. Do any success stories for my situation even exist?
If I can provide any other information that would be helpful, please let me know. Sorry for writing an essay, I think I needed to vent out my feelings a little bit. But thank you if you took the time to read this drivel and I appreciate anyone who would be able to help me!
