Paternity Leave
Started by SeekerOfTheTree
My program gives 4 shifts.
Programs are required to give the same amount of leave under FMLA to men that they give to women. The catch is that it's unpaid (although you can use accrued sick and vacation time to cover it) and that it doesn't kick in (as a federal requirement) until you've been employed for at least 12 months. Some states (like mine) allow it after 6 months and some programs will just give you the time off (again...unpaid).
I got 1 full month off when my daughter was born. 2 weeks of vacation (adjusted to start on her due date), 1 week paid for with accrued sick time and 1 week unpaid. Don't expect this in August of your intern year though.
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Hi Gutonc,
I am just curious. In hindsight, was it worth it? I am talking the time off from training. I am not in that position yet, but don't really know what's best in that situation, as it is a very real possibility in the not so distant future.
It's worth taking time off to be with your family and make sure your wife makes the transition from woman to mother. My wife had a baby during 4th year, and I can tell you that I wouldn't want to be anywhere but home for those first two weeks, and that's even with solid family support that flew in to help us.
Just my 2-cents. Residency may be different, but I place my wife and daughter above work (especially when it's post-delivery!).
If we are due in November when and how should I ask for time off. I feel like they will think I am a slacker. Could I take FMLA for a month in November? Could this be bad for my residency.
Our PC sent us an email a few weeks ago asking the incoming interns if/when we needed time off for babies, weddings, etc. Hope your program is this accepting! They can get creative with scheduling and keep you off trauma surgery that month, which will free you way up without having to take much time off!
If you are starting your intern year in July, you will not be entitled to FMLA in November. You have to have worked there for a full year. You may want to inquire now. They may still give you something. They may require you to use your vacation time and not give you unpaid time off.
And yes, they will think you are slacker, right or wrong. It is unlikely they will say or do anything to you, besides bitch about you behind your back. This is just like they will bitch about any woman who takes maternity leave.
And yes, they will think you are slacker, right or wrong. It is unlikely they will say or do anything to you, besides bitch about you behind your back. This is just like they will bitch about any woman who takes maternity leave.
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I think a month is significant overkill. I was an M4 for my first, and I was on vacation for two months after he was born, except for interviews. It was nice, sure, but definitely not necessary. For my second one, I was a PGY-2, and I took two days off. Taking a month off as an intern is asking a lot, and they don't have to give it to you (under FMLA). Might cause some ill will.
Doing something because you can and because you should are two different things.
You have to weigh how much this means to you with:
1) The fact you're going to have to burn all your vacation on it
2) If you don't use vacation, you may have to graduate residency later
3) This means more work for your colleagues during a time that their opinions of you are important
4) The fall of intern year is a very important learning period
5) Nobody takes a month off to have a baby, unless they're the ones actually in labor, and that's still a little long
6) To reiterate #3, you're taking the chance that your colleagues and program leadership could hate you before intern year starts just by asking for such a large request (again, right or wrong)
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Good advice. Thanks guys.
Absolutely worth it. Didn't delay my graduation one bit, just removed a week of elective time later. Didn't inconvenience any of the co-interns because I was scheduled on a consult rotation at the time (that already had 3 other residents on it).
I'd probably do it again too (but we're not having any more so it's a moot point).
you've got to be kidding me....
As delicious as newborn babies are, save some of your sick days and goodwill with your colleagues for earaches, teething, poor sleep nights, ingested foreign bodies and all the other fun you will be getting into for the year to come.
All during the pregnancy, hustle to cover shifts for everyone else so that you have accrued a backlog of days off owed to you.
All during the pregnancy, hustle to cover shifts for everyone else so that you have accrued a backlog of days off owed to you.
Stupid kids.
This.
You can accrue quite a bit of shifts in advance if you try. Shift trades are really common, and we often paid people back in different months - you just have to be meticulous to keep track if you do it multiple times. Sometimes the trades don't work out perfectly, but this is a good way to pre-generate goodwill and lessen the shift load if you know well in advance.
I could pay people to cover my shifts?
Time with kids means alot to me. Money is whatevs.
Time with kids means alot to me. Money is whatevs.
I doubt your program would allow this. Each resident needs to complete there shifts for a education standpoint, not just to have the shifts covered.
You could potentially enti¢e someone to take it, as a very motivated $eller (short notice, holiday/weekend, evil attending, etc).
But the above advice is correct; the hours need to square up, so $$$ is only for trades.
-d
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Good advice guys. I will take what time I can get. Most corporates only give one week so I can't complain. It's the real world again after a long time. Gotta suck it up and grow a pair.
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I'm not quite a doctor yet, but I think you probably have a working pair.
Lol. You might be seeing me on Maury soon.
I plan on having kids during residency also, most likely end of first year or beginning of 2nd. But, I probably won't try to take paternity leave.
I will, however, make sure I work my butt off, so that when the time comes and people are aware my wife is pregnant and about to deliver, I am hoping to accrue enough favors to get a few days off/traded.
I am thinking that is the best way to go about things without pissing people off.
I will, however, make sure I work my butt off, so that when the time comes and people are aware my wife is pregnant and about to deliver, I am hoping to accrue enough favors to get a few days off/traded.
I am thinking that is the best way to go about things without pissing people off.
You should take paternity leave. It is not just for you--it's important that you be there for your wife and baby. Furthermore, you are entering a new level of sleep deprivation, so it's probably better for the patients if you are out of the hospital for a couple of weeks. Even if you graduate late (which is unlikely in any humane program), so what? You will never get that time with your new family back.
You should tell your program as soon as you are comfortable doing so. Ideally, you can plan a "light" rotation around the EDC. And I agree, helping out your colleagues beforehand will build a lot of goodwill, but don't live at the hospital--your wife needs your support before the baby arrives, too.
D
deleted245139
My wife will deliver early August ... I just plan on a tiring year haha. It's much too soon to take time off IMO. My wife is stellar and our moms have offered to come stay with us for a while. I feel your pain though. My program has been amazing so far... They will try to schedule me for a lighter rotation with a vacation block built in to make my life easier. Should be enough.
It's very doable. You will never regret making time to be there with your spouse and newborn. Most programs will simply try to put you on a light rotation. I had two children during residency and went on to be chief resident, so I don't think it negatively impacted what my colleagues or attendings thought of me. When I was chief I did all our scheduling and I had 1/3 of my graduating class with due dates all in the same month. It's tough but family is important so you make things work.
The best parents in the world won't replace the absence of a spouse during this transitional period. Take some time up front (or at least be in a super easy month like ultrasound or something) to make it easier and much more rewarding for you and your wife. I have a new baby at home so this is really fresh for me.
D
deleted245139
I agree w you. And I know that once I see her smiling face ill never want to leave it haha
Medicine is your job, not your life. You, your wife, and your baby all need you take paternity leave. A humane program will not exact a pound of flesh for this, but any real or theoretical professional cost pales in comparison to this time with your family. I see medical students and residents (attendings, less so) try to be good little soldiers and buck up in the face of life events both joyous and tragic so as not to "let down" their colleagues. There are times when you need to be a person and not a doctor, and the birth of a child is one of them.
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Don't worry, it will turn into a crying face, and then you'll be happy you're headed to work sometimes
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