Scared of classmate going postal

[amoebaman]

Hello everyone. I am a long time reader of this forum, but I never felt the need to post until now.

I'm in third year, and since the fall, my classmate has always seemed a bit off. However, it never struck me as a problem because I've had my fair share of experience with eccentric personalities.

I became concerned when my wife became worried about this student simply hearing about his eccentricities and lack of social skills. Then, I became flat-out worried when other students started to talk about how weird this student is.

I was quite happy to simply avoid this student. Now I am rotating with him again and he has turned from eccentric into downright scary. He has a few students that he openly hates and he generally feels victimized by the team. A few residents have mocked him during rounds which made me uneasy because I feel that he is one guy you do not want to push to the limit.

I realize I may look paranoid but I also feel that our gut feelings are there for a reason.

I am not going to raise this issue with anyone because I'm almost finished and shouldn't be seeing this guy again, but I feel ethically compelled to implore people on here not to bully these types of people. While "going postal" is a rare phenomenon, it does happen and it's obviously tragic. I also think it's somewhat avoidable...

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[red10]

if the dude is freaking you out enough to the point you think he might snap, you should feel ethically compelled to tell someone at your school that this guy might snap.

You're lucky enough to be almost done with him, but if the dude snaps later on and you hear how he did something horrible, you're going to feel really ****ty knowing if he had gotten some help, maybe it wouldn't have happened.
If he's really as bad as you say, and not just socially awkward, you really should tell someone so he can get help.

 

[xanthines]

I'm sure you value your wife's opinions, but hers are basically a sounding board of yours. She's basically telling you what you want to hear, whether she knows it or not.

So all you really have to go on is your gut, at least from what you've posted. So he hates other students and feels victimized. That probably describes more medical students than you'd think. I'm not sure what the mocking involves so it's a bit hard to figure what that really means in this context.

If you're truly and genuinely concerned (it doesn't sound like it from post, to be totally honest), I'd go talk to a dean/faculty you really, really trust or a counselor separate from the med school administration to figure out what you should do. You don't want to ding the guy's record for no reason and you definitely don't want it known you were the tattler if he actually does crack. The devil is in the details and we have none.

-X

 

[amoebaman]

if the dude is freaking you out enough to the point you think he might snap, you should feel ethically compelled to tell someone at your school that this guy might snap.

You're lucky enough to be almost done with him, but if the dude snaps later on and you hear how he did something horrible, you're going to feel really ****ty knowing if he had gotten some help, maybe it wouldn't have happened.
If he's really as bad as you say, and not just socially awkward, you really should tell someone so he can get help.

You're right, and that is exactly what would happen if he does snap. I have a strong suspicion he won't make it through residency based on how MIA he is...I'm not sure how he's passing, but it's not really my place to comment.

And that brings me to the problem: despite my concerns I am worried that I will be labeled for causing trouble. I know for a fact that the residents have picked up on his weirdness. They have more clout than I do as a medical student to recommend to the administration that he see a psychiatrist.

I am worried and yet I feel my hands are tied. Medicine is such a conservative profession that I do not want to jeopardize my own career if it is brushed off and I look like I am defaming someone.

 

[amoebaman]

I'm sure you value your wife's opinions, but hers are basically a sounding board of yours. She's basically telling you what you want to hear, whether she knows it or not.

So all you really have to go on is your gut, at least from what you've posted. So he hates other students and feels victimized. That probably describes more medical students than you'd think. I'm not sure what the mocking involves so it's a bit hard to figure what that really means in this context.

If you're truly and genuinely concerned (it doesn't sound like it from post, to be totally honest), I'd go talk to a dean/faculty you really, really trust or a counselor separate from the med school administration to figure out what you should do. You don't want to ding the guy's record for no reason and you definitely don't want it known you were the tattler if he actually does crack. The devil is in the details and we have none.

-X

The details are scary and would likely identify the guy if he ever came on here. The best feedback I can get from my vague post is probably "what would you do if you *knew* this person was mentally unstable?" Again, I am not just basing it on my own feelings (or my wife's, who only has one side of the story). I'm basing it on 75% of my classmates' feelings who ever came into contact with the guy.

Thanks for your input.

 

[xanthines]

Then definitely talk to someone you trust and have a list of clear reasons and objective examples of why you think this guy might crack and more importantly, might be a harm to himself or others. Your school almost definitely has a procedure set in place for something like this.

-X

 

[NTF]

Basically this is what I'm reading.
1)You think he's a weirdo
2)You think he's eccentric
3)You don't like him
4)Your wife and some of your classmates don't like him
5)You think he lacks social skills
6)He openly hates and feels victimized by a team who you admit mock him

Unless there's more there isn't anything here that warrants you doing anything at this point. Of course, if you had a little compassion for the guy you might ask him out for a cup of coffee and talk to him. Maybe he's depressed. Maybe he just needs to vent. Maybe he should talk to a therapist or psychiatrist and you could encourage him. Maybe he just needs a sympathetic ear.

If you hear him saying something that you can infer as a desire to do real harm to himself or others (especially patients), than you definitely need to talk to someone (a dean or counselor) about it.

 

[phospho]

Basically this is what I'm reading.
1)You think he's a weirdo
2)You think he's eccentric
3)You don't like him
4)Your wife and some of your classmates don't like him
5)You think he lacks social skills
6)He openly hates and feels victimized by a team who you admit mock him

Unless there's more there isn't anything here that warrants you doing anything at this point. Of course, if you had a little compassion for the guy you might ask him out for a cup of coffee and talk to him. Maybe he's depressed. Maybe he just needs to vent. Maybe he should talk to a therapist or psychiatrist and you could encourage him. Maybe he just needs a sympathetic ear.

If you hear him saying something that you can infer as a desire to do real harm to himself or others (especially patients), than you definitely need to talk to someone (a dean or counselor) about it.

right on dude... I totally agree 👍👍👍

 

[cpants]

Keep your mouth shut, and mind your own business. Unless the kid has threatened to harm himself or others, there is nothing you should do. There are tons of eccentric, socially awkard people in medical school and in the world. Almost none of them are in any way dangerous. Implying to an administrator that an already struggling kid is dangerous based on your "gut", will only cause him more strife and make you look like a jackass. Why not show the kid a little respect and kindness? Maybe you could help him out. Supposedly you got into this business to help people, right?

 

[SGuttenberg]

As a socially ackward and ugly person myself who is often made fun of and ostracized I am really happy to see the support this guy is getting in this thread. Our lives are hard enough as is without your stupid witch hunts.

 

[amoebaman]

I understand that it must be difficult to be ostracized. I wasn't popular in high school and I know what it feels like to be targeted for my flaws (whether it was real or imagined). I did try to talk to this guy but he seemed intimidated by me. I'm not sure why because we are both from the same country and initially we were talking about that...

Another classmate talked to him, asked him if he was okay after he had a particularly rough night. He exploded and said "you aren't my psychiatrist."He then ran out of the room. An attending witnessed this incident but made no comment. This happened a while ago, and now he talks about hating the student who tried to be sympathetic and help him.

I feel truly sorry for the guy because he has very low self-esteem. He cannot talk without mumbling quietly by the end of the sentence. He cannot even report vitals during rounds without trailing off mid-sentence.

I know I look like a jackass but I was just really unsure what to do, if anything. I've resolved not to do anything unless he makes a threat or talks about suicide. I presume most sensible people would do the same thing -- after all, we're all in health care.

In the interim I'll try to be nicer.

 

[VoiceofReason]

. A few residents have mocked him during rounds

i almost went a whole day without being reminded that humanity is essentially malicious trash, thanks OP

 

[MsKrispyKreme]

If I were you, I'd mention the students' behavior and your concerns to the appropriate administrative person (one of the deans) as well as your school's mental health counselor. Also, check your student manual. My school has guidelines for the appropriate steps to be taken for a mentally ill student.

Unfortunately, medicine often attracts some mentally ill as well as socially awkward individuals. Sometimes it's hard to tell the difference.

 

[Ana1982]

Usually it's over the stupidest reason - you would think it's jealousy over grades or residency placements...but they will yell at you and cuss you out if you are a really pretty girl/really handsome guy, wear nicer clothes, drive a nicer car...I mean come on...seriously! Grow up people.

 

[DirtyNetter]

Look,

I know this is something that has been on your mind and you want to get it off your chest (hence your post). However, none of us know the situation or the person better than you do. Going to the internet to ask strangers for advice concerning someone they've never met is not the best way to get this done.

If your gut is telling you something, then you should listen to it. Doesn't your school have someone who you could talk about these issues with in confidence? If you're going to report it, just make sure that the only people who know about it are the ones who truly need to know. Don't tell your fellow classmates (I'm not saying you would, just giving general advice here) or anyone else who wouldn't be directly involved in the handling of this situation.

On a related note, have you guys/girls read this?
http://jama.ama-assn.org/cgi/content/short/304/2/187

 

[Guyton Killah]

...but they will yell at you and cuss you out if you are a really pretty girl/really handsome guy, wear nicer clothes, drive a nicer car...I mean come on...seriously! Grow up people.

Word! Typical med behavior. Sad but true. If you are smarter than them, they will do anything, anything at all to pull you down. (Even if it means mocking you ''during the rounds''. They'll just hate. Just like the OP and his crew)

 

[Bartelby]

Word! Typical med behavior. Sad but true. If you are smarter than them, they will do anything, anything at all to pull you down. (Even if it means mocking you ''during the rounds''. They'll just hate. Just like the OP and his crew)

I wonder how much people are projecting their own feelings and insecurities on their classmates. I haven't had a single classmate do anything (that I know of) to try to hurt my education/career in med school.

As for the OP, I like the idea of getting to know the guy better. If you addressed something with him head on it would probably just piss him off, but if you get to know each other he might be more comfortable giving you some insight into his situation and even asking for your advice/help if he needs it.

 

[Ana1982]

Word! Typical med behavior. Sad but true. If you are smarter than them, they will do anything, anything at all to pull you down. (Even if it means mocking you ''during the rounds''. They'll just hate. Just like the OP and his crew)

Good looking, nice, calm, polite people get it the worst! If you are kinda "sweet, innocent, take home to meet mom" type, they just go off on you!

😡 you can't win with these people man

 

[Ana1982]

One bully had a 270 on Step 1 and was interviewed for ivy league neurosurg...I have NO idea how they'll get through residency...

 

[cpants]

I seriously don't know WTF you all are talking about. Some of you sound like you need a good berating. Calling the cops for someone yelling obsenities at you? I wonder how that would have worked out for you.

I repeat. SHUT YOUR MOUTH. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. If you follow these two suggestions, you will avoid a lot of negative attention.

 

[jackieMD2007]

Look,
If your gut is telling you something, then you should listen to it. Doesn't your school have someone who you could talk about these issues with in confidence? If you're going to report it, just make sure that the only people who know about it are the ones who truly need to know. Don't tell your fellow classmates (I'm not saying you would, just giving general advice here) or anyone else who wouldn't be directly involved in the handling of this situation.

👍 I'm sure there is someone you could talk to without fear of retribution or being reported or whatever, as long as you do it professionally--something along the lines of:

"I'm really concerned about such-and-such because I have noticed some labile behavior over a period of X weeks. S/He seems to have a lot of emotional outbursts and does not respond favorably (and sometimes violently or explosively) to offers of help or concern. I thought you should be aware of this situation if nothing else."

Don't say things that other people have said, don't tell the dean what your wife thinks, etc. Don't exaggerate or speculate about what the other student could do or be capable of, don't drag it out. Just keep it short and simple and to the point.

 

[dozitgetchahi]

I seriously don't know WTF you all are talking about. Some of you sound like you need a good berating. Calling the cops for someone yelling obsenities at you? I wonder how that would have worked out for you.

I repeat. SHUT YOUR MOUTH. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. If you follow these two suggestions, you will avoid a lot of negative attention.

I second this.

Honestly, some medical schools have screwy regulations in place that more or less force the administration to "investigate" said students if a classmate expresses concerns. You could do an awful lot of damage to someone's career without good reason.

If you actually encounter this guy acting in bad faith or endangering somebody, then tell someone. Otherwise, don't mess with people just so you can feel like a do-gooder.

 

[cpants]

👍 I'm sure there is someone you could talk to without fear of retribution or being reported or whatever, as long as you do it professionally--something along the lines of:

"I'm really concerned about such-and-such because I have noticed some labile behavior over a period of X weeks. S/He seems to have a lot of emotional outbursts and does not respond favorably (and sometimes violently or explosively) to offers of help or concern. I thought you should be aware of this situation if nothing else."

Don't say things that other people have said, don't tell the dean what your wife thinks, etc. Don't exaggerate or speculate about what the other student could do or be capable of, don't drag it out. Just keep it short and simple and to the point.

That might be an appropriate way to approach things if the op had actually witnessed any "violent or explosive" behavior. Instead he, his wife, and their med school clique have decided that this fellow is in some way dangerous because he is weird, doesn't fit in, and has had negative reactions to people openly mocking him. It would be wrong to prompt administrative investigation into the kid for these reasons. The compassionate thing would be to be friendly to him and stop flapping your lips behind his back. If he actually threatens or exhibits violent or psychotic behavior, you can intervene then. Until then, mouth shut, mind own business.

 

[Ischiowhat]

I'm in third year, and since the fall, my classmate has always seemed a bit off. However, it never struck me as a problem because I've had my fair share of experience with eccentric personalities.

I became concerned when my wife became worried about this student simply hearing about his eccentricities and lack of social skills. Then, I became flat-out worried when other students started to talk about how weird this student is.

I think you just described the majority of med students right there.

 

[The Poet Sings]

I think you just described the majority of med students right there.

and also the majority of serial killers 😱. OH NO!
seriously i think the op should keep an eye out on this guy. try to find out what his deal is.

 

[Substance]

I'd be quite angry and openly hostile to people if said people were mocking me to my face. As far as it seems to me, he's reacting normally to the abuse. He's not accepting it like you think he should. Your attitude, and the attitude of your team, suggests a certain type of pretentiousness.

You're not a psychiatrist, and you have no expertise to judge someone's mental stability based on your occasional interaction with this person. Maybe he just doesn't like you and the team. That's human, and based on what his experience has been with that team, unsurprising. As far as "psychopaths" go, the most charming and normal-appearing people are more likely to be the empathy-bereft psychopaths.

Mind your own business.

 

[jackieMD2007]

That might be an appropriate way to approach things if the op had actually witnessed any "violent or explosive" behavior. Instead he, his wife, and their med school clique have decided that this fellow is in some way dangerous because he is weird, doesn't fit in, and has had negative reactions to people openly mocking him. It would be wrong to prompt administrative investigation into the kid for these reasons. The compassionate thing would be to be friendly to him and stop flapping your lips behind his back. If he actually threatens or exhibits violent or psychotic behavior, you can intervene then. Until then, mouth shut, mind own business.

Right. Exactly. Which is why I wanted to demonstrate an appropriate thing that you would say to a dean or whatever if you were in the situation. Which clearly it seems OP is not. 🙂

 

[Bassix]

Basically this is what I'm reading.
1)You think he's a weirdo
2)You think he's eccentric
3)You don't like him
4)Your wife and some of your classmates don't like him
5)You think he lacks social skills
6)He openly hates and feels victimized by a team who you admit mock him

Unless there's more there isn't anything here that warrants you doing anything at this point. Of course, if you had a little compassion for the guy you might ask him out for a cup of coffee and talk to him. Maybe he's depressed. Maybe he just needs to vent. Maybe he should talk to a therapist or psychiatrist and you could encourage him. Maybe he just needs a sympathetic ear.

If you hear him saying something that you can infer as a desire to do real harm to himself or others (especially patients), than you definitely need to talk to someone (a dean or counselor) about it.

This 👍

I think Machiavelli said it best

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel. Every one sees what you appear to be, few really know what you are."

The student probably needs someone to talk to. Everyone has different stress tolerances. I would think telling an authoritative figure might set him off even more, especially since you don't know this person on an individual level.

 

[DirtyNetter]

Ah Machiavelli, a man of many words...

"Before all else, be armed." Hope the person in question hasn't been reading The Prince lately. 😱

 

[smq123]

seriously i think the op should keep an eye out on this guy. try to find out what his deal is.

"What his deal is"? His "deal" is that his residents, his classmates, and everyone around treats him like crap. They have all (and I include the OP in this) apparently decided that, instead of doing the mature thing and treating this guy with graciousness, friendliness, and respect, talking sh** about him, both behind his back and to his face, is more satisfying.

Yeah, I have *no* idea why this guy would be angry at the universe. [/sarcasm]

I realize I may look paranoid but I also feel that our gut feelings are there for a reason.

I am not going to raise this issue with anyone because I'm almost finished and shouldn't be seeing this guy again, but I feel ethically compelled to implore people on here not to bully these types of people. While "going postal" is a rare phenomenon, it does happen and it's obviously tragic. I also think it's somewhat avoidable...

Perhaps you're not feeling paranoid. Perhaps you're feeling guilty for not being nicer to this guy back when he was just a little "eccentric."

And we shouldn't really bully anyone, not just "these types of people." I mean, we're all adults....bullying is something that children do. I mean, come on.

 

[PhillyCheese]

I seriously don't know WTF you all are talking about. Some of you sound like you need a good berating. Calling the cops for someone yelling obsenities at you? I wonder how that would have worked out for you.

I repeat. SHUT YOUR MOUTH. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. If you follow these two suggestions, you will avoid a lot of negative attention.

Thank you. I seriously cannot believe the mindset of the people on this thread. Hardest part of medschool for me was trying to fit in. Never did. Always been scared of people like the OP. And yes I mean scared.

 

[Ana1982]

double post

 

[PhillyCheese]

No. This person came up behind me in the hospital and knocked me onto the ground, all my medical textbooks and papers went flying everywhere and they laughed hysterically at me. This person also made fun of parts of my body, made paper airplanes and threw it into my face during medical grand rounds. This person is 38 years old and a little too old to be doing this.

I confronted this person, told them I did not like behind knocked over and paper airplanes thrown in my face, and they burst into hysterical tears and ran away crying. Keep in mind this person is almost 40.

See that's the thing. On the one hand I can't really defend a creep, but on the other hand, I feel that especially a medical student would know that this :

"a screaming hateful tirade filled with obscenities at me...in front of everyone in rotations...everyone told me to call the police but I didn't want to get that person into trouble (or dismissed from school)"

and this

"This person came up behind me in the hospital and knocked me onto the ground, all my medical textbooks and papers went flying everywhere and they laughed hysterically at me. This person also made fun of parts of my body, made paper airplanes and threw it into my face during medical grand rounds. "

are 2 totally different stories. That leads me to question a lot...Not to say that either story is okay, just that one warrants calling the police and the other does not. Funny how the story changed...

 

[GladifImakeit]

Seriously please leave this guy alone. People are too quick to judge and too slow to understand. It's easy to feel like the whole world is against you.

I had a stellar record in medical school but I cried one time in class and got reported to the deans. Now I'm permanently messed up. Don't do that to someone.

Love thy enemy, or at least turn the other cheek.

 

[amoebaman]

It's definitely not normal when people who are not in your "clique" all say cautiously "wow, that guy seems like he could bring a gun one day."

As I said before, a student tried the sympathetic listening approach and got screamed at in front of the attending. The guy then stormed off.

So I take issue with some people on here saying I'm contributing to the problem. I'm courteous with this guy. I'm just not his best friend. And initially, we got on because we are from the same culture and have similar experiences. Yet he just turned completely weird.

I also agree that psychopaths can be charming and I think, even charismatic. Also, not all psychopaths are murderers. On the flip side it doesn't take a psychopath to bring a gun to school/work because some people who commit acts of violence just are depressed and have a lapse in judgment.

It's the unknown that creeps me out. I never think about these scary things for anyone else, so that's why I'm putting so much weight on the "gut feeling." Also, I don't have enough interactions with this guy to report him, so I won't, and I don't wish that he has his career ruined over this -- heck no. I want him to succeed, if only so that he can improve his self-esteem (and maybe stop scaring people).

 

[penguin24]

It's definitely not normal when people who are not in your "clique" all say cautiously "wow, that guy seems like he could bring a gun one day."

As I said before, a student tried the sympathetic listening approach and got screamed at in front of the attending. The guy then stormed off.

So I take issue with some people on here saying I'm contributing to the problem. I'm courteous with this guy. I'm just not his best friend. And initially, we got on because we are from the same culture and have similar experiences. Yet he just turned completely weird.

I also agree that psychopaths can be charming and I think, even charismatic. Also, not all psychopaths are murderers. On the flip side it doesn't take a psychopath to bring a gun to school/work because some people who commit acts of violence just are depressed and have a lapse in judgment.

It's the unknown that creeps me out. I never think about these scary things for anyone else, so that's why I'm putting so much weight on the "gut feeling." Also, I don't have enough interactions with this guy to report him, so I won't, and I don't wish that he has his career ruined over this -- heck no. I want him to succeed, if only so that he can improve his self-esteem (and maybe stop scaring people).

This is speculation, you shouldn't report somebody b/c you think he could bring a gun. Has he ever mentioned guns? Killing people? Killing himself? Violence against other people? From what you say, it seems like he didn't. It's wrong to report somebody on the basis of weirdness, the odds are more than likely he isn't violent. Just b/c some people in the media these past few years went to school (Columbine killer, VA tech killer) and shot people up, doesn't mean IMO that you should report something of a non-violent nature just b/c you're paranoid.

Let me ask you, has this person ever mentioned using violence against anybody? Has he ever mentioned guns/murder?

 

[Ana1982]

Just know that YES this stuff really DOES happen in med school, out of a class of 100 there is always 1 weirdo (look at Philip Markoff, who hanged himself by the way) and if it escalates you NEED to report it.

 

[PhillyCheese]

double post

 

[PhillyCheese]

The story didn't change. This is not just petty jealous female rivalry. This person was harassing me for the first 2 years of medical school and I kept ignoring this individual, hoping they would go away, but they were like "oh! she's not going to fight back! so i can keep doing it!" so they kept getting madder and madder at me. It is true. I have MANY incidents. This person also kept making fun of my breast size, shoving me out of the way, going into screaming tirades at me. Very unprofessional. I am NOT the only med student this person did this to. I knew this individual was psychotic and unstable so I always walked away.

You don't have to believe me. It's a public message board and you don't know anything other than my first name. Just know that YES this stuff really DOES happen in med school, out of a class of 100 there is always 1 weirdo (look at Philip Markoff) and if it escalates you NEED to report it. At least the deans can get them to chill out and leave you alone.

It's not that I don't believe you, but if he/she put their hand on you and you didn't call the police, there is something wrong. If he/she didn't put their hand on you and you were thinking about calling the police, there is something wrong. IMO

 

[cpants]

The story didn't change. This is not just petty jealous female rivalry. This person was harassing me for the first 2 years of medical school and I kept ignoring this individual, hoping they would go away, but they were like "oh! she's not going to fight back! so i can keep doing it!" so they kept getting madder and madder at me. It is true. I have MANY incidents. This person also kept making fun of my breast size, shoving me out of the way, going into screaming tirades at me. Very unprofessional. I am NOT the only med student this person did this to. I knew this individual was psychotic and unstable so I always walked away.

You don't have to believe me. It's a public message board and you don't know anything other than my first name. Just know that YES this stuff really DOES happen in med school, out of a class of 100 there is always 1 weirdo (look at Philip Markoff) and if it escalates you NEED to report it. At least the deans can get them to chill out and leave you alone.

Uh, the story absolutely changed. You first said you considered calling the police after a verbal altercation. You then CHANGED the story to include an assault. What am I missing?

If your second story is true, then it's absolutely appropriate to escalate to the administration and or legal authorities. No one gets to put their hands on you without permission, ever. And persistent verbal abuse including sexual comments is also completely unacceptable.

Your story, however, has little bearing on the OP's situation. Unlike you, the OP has not been harassed or assaulted by this individual. He and his friends think the guy is weird and unstable. The OP should not consider alerting the administration based on this opinion or any "gut" feeling.

 

[theVster]

I'd be quite angry and openly hostile to people if said people were mocking me to my face. As far as it seems to me, he's reacting normally to the abuse. He's not accepting it like you think he should. Your attitude, and the attitude of your team, suggests a certain type of pretentiousness.

You're not a psychiatrist, and you have no expertise to judge someone's mental stability based on your occasional interaction with this person. Maybe he just doesn't like you and the team. That's human, and based on what his experience has been with that team, unsurprising. As far as "psychopaths" go, the most charming and normal-appearing people are more likely to be the empathy-bereft psychopaths.

Mind your own business.

This RIGHT HERE. 👍👍👍

If I had a dime for people like you, OP, who judge everyone who comes into contact with them, I'd be a rich man. But you're ready to call the police because someone seems different? That's not just cold, that's disgusting. Unless he has threatened someone or mentioned causing physical harm to someone don't do anything.

Your friend who tried to talk to him also came off as pretentious. You do not go up to people and use condescension to try and "understand" them. That'll just piss them off as you so aptly were able to find out. I also have had friends who hated their classmates and couldn't stand to be around them... with good reason... not everyone in medical school has the same personality and those who are different from the "expected norm" or have different interests tend to be ostracized in the medical school environment. Go freaking figure, it's like high school all over again as has been said numerous times.

@Ana1982-- You're describing someone who physically assaulted you. That is not the same situation

 

[theVster]

Thank you. I seriously cannot believe the mindset of the people on this thread. Hardest part of medschool for me was trying to fit in. Never did. Always been scared of people like the OP. And yes I mean scared.

I agree 100%. I definitely have had trouble fitting into med school myself. Many people do, and many of them simply won't admit it. The kid the OP is talking about is just being obvious about it and tired of taking abuse and nonsense from the people in his class. I have definitely felt like screaming at people in my class before... that doesn't mean I want to hurt someone... and I'm pretty sure the person the OP is talking about just wants a helping hand.

This isn't effing 10th grade anymore. If someone is a little different or has different interests, nurture them and befriend them instead of being a bastard and ostracizing them to boost your own self-esteem. You don't have to even be friends with them, just be friendly for god's sake. Maybe instead of talking sh*& about him behind his back on an open forum you could talk to him instead, show him some affection. Sorry OP I have no sympathy for your "plight".

 

[MsKrispyKreme]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philip_Markoff

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Swango

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nidal_Malik_Hasan

Don't ignore the warning signs.

If they put their hands on you, and you didn't call the police, there's something wrong. If they didn't put there hands on you and you were thinking about calling the police, then there is something wrong.

That poster is a troll who makes up various stories about people being jealous of her. She's been banned at least twice before so don't believe the lies she writes.

 

[theVster]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Philip_Markoff

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Swango

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nidal_Malik_Hasan

Don't ignore the warning signs.



That poster is a troll who makes up various stories about people being jealous of her. She's been banned at least twice before so don't believe the lies she writes.

Markoff was deranged and had right wing views slightly right of Hitler. Swango murdered his patients over years and years. Hasan was a religious extremist nutcase who was already unstable, and had access to guns given that he was in the MILITARY.

You're comparing these to a kid who has been mocked by his peers and wears his emotions on his shirt. Give me a break.

 

[MsKrispyKreme]

Markoff was deranged and had right wing views slightly right of Hitler. Swango murdered his patients over years and years. Hasan was a religious extremist nutcase who was already unstable, and had access to guns given that he was in the MILITARY.

You're comparing these to a kid who has been mocked by his peers and wears his emotions on his shirt. Give me a break.

Surely, you aren't that simple? In all 3 cases that I posted, medical school classmates and hospital colleagues suspected mental illness but either did not report it or were not taken seriously. That was my point. Stop defending this lunatic blindly.

 

[amoebaman]

Penguin24 said:

Let me ask you, has this person ever mentioned using violence against anybody? Has he ever mentioned guns/murder?

No to all of the above.


theVster, you're projecting.

I definitely have had trouble fitting into med school myself.

I never said I was calling the police!


And you need to calm down and friggin' read what I wrote.

1) I said:

I take issue with some people on here saying I'm contributing to the problem. I'm courteous with this guy. I'm just not his best friend. And initially, we got on because we are from the same culture and have similar experiences. Yet he just turned completely weird.

You said:

You don't have to even be friends with them, just be friendly for god's sake.

Um, ok? Relax, dude...

2) theVster said:

you're ready to call the police because someone seems different? That's not just cold, that's disgusting. Unless he has threatened someone or mentioned causing physical harm to someone don't do anything.

I never said I was calling the police! 🙄 Go check!!

theVster said:

Maybe instead of talking sh*& about him behind his back on an open forum you could talk to him instead, show him some affection.

Been there, done that...so has another classmate, who was not condescending.

theVster said:

Your friend who tried to talk to him also came off as pretentious. You do not go up to people and use condescension to try and "understand" them. That'll just piss them off as you so aptly were able to find out.

The guy clearly had a rough night and my fellow classmate approached him with genuine (and genuine-sounding) concern.

Okay, theVster, I'm done refuting some of your many assumptions and gross misinterpretation of my posts.


MsKrispyKreme said:

The poster (Ana1982) is a troll who makes up various stories about people being jealous of her. She's been banned at least twice before so don't believe the lies she writes.

Agreed, the moderators should definitely look into this. The private messages I received from Ana1982 are even more outrageous and explicit than the posts on here. But I'm not bothered by them -- I got a good laugh out of it.

BTW, Krispy Kremes are amazing.

 

[amoebaman]

Update:

I am not reporting this guy. Nobody here should be assuming that I even want to report this guy. That was never my intention to begin with...

I was just trying to raise the issue of dealing with the extremely eccentric personality types that give you the heebie jeebies. I just wanted to know what people do and what their experiences are...I totally agree that until this guy exhibits violent behaviour, or threatens to do something, I have no basis for a complaint.

Then again, the Virgina Tech shooter, Seung-Hui Cho, actually wrote down references to violence in school assignments (but who knows how elaborate they were), which for some reason didn't give people enough of a basis to complain about his odd behaviour.

Sueng-Hui Cho: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seung-Hui_Cho

I know these situations are rare, like plane crashes are rare, but that doesn't mean I want to ignore what appear to be warning signs. I'm definitely keeping an eye on this guy.

A life in medicine is stressful and it sometimes makes people snap, like this guy who shot the program director at the University of Washington: http://www.seattlepi.com/local/pathweb.shtml

A University of Washington medical resident who was going to be fired on Saturday walked into the office of his administrator yesterday and fatally shot him before turning the gun on himself.
The gunman, Dr. Jian Chen, a medical resident of one year, had come from medical school in Shanghai to work at the UW Medical Center. But a fellow worker said Chen "was not cutting it" because of language and interpersonal problems, and had known for months that his job was in peril.

 

[KeyzerSoze]

Hasan was a religious extremist nutcase who was already unstable, and had access to guns given that he was in the MILITARY.

Having access to guns is a red flag? Come on. Other than in the least free states such as IL and CA, any American medical student has easy access to guns, and rightfully so.

 

[Ana1982]

double post

 

[Ana1982]

The private messages I received from Ana1982 are even more outrageous and explicit than the posts on here. But I'm not bothered by them -- I got a good laugh out of it.

What message? I'm confused 😕