Sexuality

[PreciousHamburgers]

Being out in my application was absolutely necessary, as it put a lot of things into context and I did not want to have to tip-toe around any experiences. It would have made things very awkward. It worked out fine for me. Just don't apply to Loma Linda and you'll be fine.

---

Members don't see this ad.

 

[malick1]

This is offensive, in case you didn't realize.

Please enlighten me, how is this offensive ?

 

[PreciousHamburgers]

Please enlighten me, how is this offensive ?

Reducing sexual orientation down to only sexual acts is offensive. If a hetero person mentioned their wife or husband and kids, you wouldn't consider it something private or even vulgar like "Adult" films. It is an offensive double standard. It implies that LGBT+ individuals should 'keep it to themselves' because it is not the norm.

 

[touchpause13]

Being out in my application was absolutely necessary, as it put a lot of things into context and I did not want to have to tip-toe around any experiences. It would have made things very awkward. It worked out fine for me. Just don't apply to Loma Linda or Liberty U and you'll be fine.

FTFY

 

[malick1]

Reducing sexual orientation down to only sexual acts is offensive. If a hetero person mentioned their wife or husband and kids, you wouldn't consider it something private or even vulgar like "Adult" films. It is an offensive double standard. It implies that LGBT+ individuals should 'keep it to themselves' because it is not the norm.

ok because of SDN TOS I can not use my prefered word for you

But if you had any critical reading skills, you would have seen that my adult film reference was used to highlight that aside from the stereotypical ideas of differences during sexual activity, between a same sex and an opposite couples, every other aspect of both relationships is exactly the same ! they love and share life the same way and in the eyes of equality, there is not one more special than the other.

 

[touchpause13]

Please enlighten me, how is this offensive ?

We've been trying to tell you this whole time that there is more to sexual orientation or gender identity than just sex. It's not that simple.

 

[touchpause13]

ok because of SDN TOS I can not use my prefered word for you

But if you had any critical reading skills, you would have seen that my adult film reference was used to highlight that aside from the stereotypical ideas of differences during sexual activity, between a same sex and an opposite couple, every other aspect of both relationship is exactly the same ! they love and share life the same way and in the eyes of equality there is one one more special than the other.

We aren't talking about relationships, we are talking about individuals and there are more differences between LGBTQ individuals and straight folks than just sex.

 

[PreciousHamburgers]

ok because of SDN TOS I can not use my prefered word for you

But if you had any critical reading skills, you would have seen that my adult film reference was used to highlight that aside from the stereotypical ideas of differences during sexual activity, between a same sex and an opposite couples, every other aspect of both relationships is exactly the same ! they love and share life the same way and in the eyes of equality, there is not one more special than the other.

Then there is no problem being out on your application

Unless someone reads it and only thinks of sex when they read anything that even alludes to a non-heterosexual relationship.

 

[lisi326]

Haha, what is a med schol husband?

husband I met because he was part of my med school class

 

[mehc012]

We aren't talking about relationships, we are talking about individuals and there are more differences between LGBTQ individuals and straight folks than just sex.

OK, actually curious here...like what?

 

[mehc012]

...for more clarification on my question,

A disproportionately high number of my friends are LGBTQ, I have LGBTQ family, heck, I have a sneaking suspicion that I will fit in more on the LGBTQ side of the scale myself once I convince my brain to even entertain the notion 'hey, that other human being is attractive' without freaking out over it - but I have always heard the perspective that we are all the same, other than who we love and have sex with.

Or are you specifically just referencing gender identity stuff rather than the sexual orientation components of LGBTQ? Cuz I always thought of that as 'just the same, only not born with everything in agreement so it took a bit more work to get here'.

 

[Cyberdyne 101]

Without judgement of the race, sexuality, or gender of the victims. The ocean hates us all equally.

Not quite. Haven't you seen The Abyss?

 

[touchpause13]

...for more clarification on my question,

A disproportionately high number of my friends are LGBTQ, I have LGBTQ family, heck, I have a sneaking suspicion that I will fit in more on the LGBTQ side of the scale myself once I convince my brain to even entertain the notion 'hey, that other human being is attractive' without freaking out over it - but I have always heard the perspective that we are all the same, other than who we love and have sex with.

Or are you specifically just referencing gender identity stuff rather than the sexual orientation components of LGBTQ? Cuz I always thought of that as 'just the same, only not born with everything in agreement so it took a bit more work to get here'.

Sure.

I'm referring to medical stuff like both me and MJ spoke of earlier in this thread, risk factors for specific diseases and the like (HIV/AIDS, depression, suicide, more likely to have cervical cancer ignored, higher rate of drug/alcohol/tobacco usage)
I'm also referring to more general differences like we are more likely to experience discrimination, minority stress, homelessness, rejection from family and the like.

My point is basically that you have to take into consideration the life experiences of your LGBTQ patients and not just assume that the only difference is in the bedroom. In a perfect world, yes that would be the only difference. Unfortunately we don't live in a perfect world.

I'm not trying to paint this all as doom and gloom, there are a lot of great things about being queer in terms of a really amazing community, the feeling of being out of the closet is damn near indescribable, and things have improved drastically since I was in high school, even more so since Stonewall.

Does that make sense?

 

[touchpause13]

Also best of luck on your own journey of self discovery. For what it's worth you can always PM me.

 

[mehc012]

Sure.

I'm referring to medical stuff like both me and MJ spoke of earlier in this thread, risk factors for specific diseases and the like (HIV/AIDS, depression, suicide, more likely to have cervical cancer ignored, higher rate of drug/alcohol/tobacco usage)
I'm also referring to more general differences like we are more likely to experience discrimination, minority stress, homelessness, rejection from family and the like.

My point is basically that you have to take into consideration the life experiences of your LGBTQ patients and not just assume that the only difference is in the bedroom. In a perfect world, yes that would be the only difference. Unfortunately we don't live in a perfect world.

I'm not trying to paint this all as doom and gloom, there are a lot of great things about being queer in terms of a really amazing community, the feeling of being out of the closet is damn near indescribable, and things have improved drastically since I was in high school, even more so since Stonewall.

Does that make sense?

Yeah, makes sense. I suppose I typically consider those factors under a different umbrella - not as differences in the individual, but more 'social context'.

 

[Pierre Escargot]

ok because of SDN TOS I can not use my prefered word for you

Utterly bizarre and misplaced use of a smiley face.

I like it.

 

[MrMe123]

Yeah, makes sense. I suppose I typically consider those factors under a different umbrella - not as differences in the individual, but more 'social context'.

It's really hard to separate those. I think a distinction not immediately apparent is that there is much less of a straight "experience" than a gay one. Straight folks don't preface every new friendly, professional, or potentially romantic situation with "What will this person think of my sexuality?" That is something that is integral to the gay experience, even in progressive areas where maybe I don't fear getting beat up but I do fear being stigmatized or humiliated for my sexuality. At least for me, I often have to place my sexuality in the social context of where I am or what I am doing. "Coming out" is a process as a gay/bi individual, when it has no place in the straight experience. That's not a one-time process, that bleeds out to every aspect of your life, and it can have an effect on how you interact with many others.

 

[mehc012]

It's really hard to separate those. I think a distinction not immediately apparent is that there is much less of a straight "experience" than a gay one. Straight folks don't preface every new friendly, professional, or potentially romantic situation with "What will this person think of my sexuality?" That is something that is integral to the gay experience, even in progressive areas where maybe I don't fear getting beat up but I do fear being stigmatized or humiliated for my sexuality. At least for me, I often have to place my sexuality in the social context of where I am or what I am doing. "Coming out" is a process as a gay/bi individual, when it has no place in the straight experience. That's not a one-time process, that bleeds out to every aspect of your life, and it can have an effect on how you interact with many others.

I didn't say that context had no effect on individuals, just that I don't think of those differences/effects as intrinsic to the individual themselves. If (and yes, I do realize how big of an if that truly is) the social stigma and its implications were removed, the effects would disappear - they are tied to the social context. Therefore, I associate those aspects with 'social context' and others, such as sexual/relationship preferences, which are intrinsic to LGBTQ individuals, with 'being gay/bi/whateverelseohmydogthislistissolong'.

I never disagreed that those effects exist or are lifelong challenges. I only explained why I had not labelled them the same way. I stand by my labeling purely because I think the distinctions I draw are important, but I respect yours - can that be enough for us?

 

[altblue]

I didn't say that context had no effect on individuals, just that I don't think of those differences/effects as intrinsic to the individual themselves. If (and yes, I do realize how big of an if that truly is) the social stigma and its implications were removed, the effects would disappear - they are tied to the social context. Therefore, I associate those aspects with 'social context' and others, such as sexual/relationship preferences, which are intrinsic to LGBTQ individuals, with 'being gay/bi/whateverelseohmydogthislistissolong'.

I never disagreed that those effects exist or are lifelong challenges. I only explained why I had not labelled them the same way. I stand by my labeling purely because I think the distinctions I draw are important, but I respect yours - can that be enough for us?

I think some of the public health crises (higher rates of STDs and psychopathology) are best viewed within social contexts, and the bulk of what generalizations are clinically useful when working with gay patients can be explained better by social contexts, but there are intrinsic differences too.

I can't name any studies off-hand, but the brains of gay men and women are different from hetero- men and women - for instance, IIRC the amount of gray matter in certain areas of gay men's brains resembled that of hetero- women.

Gay men are more likely to be "fruity" - lesbians are more likely to be butch. And I don't think it can be just written off as a cultural thing, because gay men and women struggle enough to "hide" many aspects of their identities as well, so why not act manly or feminine to accepted too? But many don't - I personally give off that "vibe", apparently, even when I'm "like I'm straight". That's just a guess on my part.

But I'm not sure if that's the best example. I stay away from gay culture (I'm bi with a slight preference for wimminz anyway, so I barely count), but that's just my input.

 

[Cyberdyne 101]

Wow, this thread has some amazing posts.