Strong personality on interview day

[init2020]

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No, not really. Only time I have ever met my match for 'doing too much all at once' was the whole reserves/student/newborn/full time work thing. Beyond that....I have been the curve setter. It is not intentional, I just do well by being me. And this sounds really arrogant. I know y'all know I am not trying to sound arrogant. When I am not number 1 I tend to be not far behind, and those ahead of be deserve to be there because they probably put more effort in to whatever it is than I did.

Bold/underline: Could they have put just as much effort or even less effort as you and were just better? Just playing a little devils advocate here.

 

[zooted]

bro you seem like the dude who tries to kill people when shaking hands, then trap them in a one-sided conversation for a half hour while they make lame excuses to leave

 

[907914]

I hope I'm not overstepping here

No, by all means. I will gladly take any feedback I can get and appreciate the honesty. That is why I made the thread, for self improvement.

I am trying to comment not on your motivations or who you are as a person, but rather how your actions and words might come across to others who don't know you well

Again, much appreciated. This is the difficulty that I have. Not in understanding the perspectives of others, but in understanding the perspectives of others as it relates to how I present myself. I only know and recognize my own lived experiences and, while I am able to reflect on those of others, I find it difficult to reflect on how others perceive mine. That is some really poor wording....

is that you seem to focus on your accomplishments and role in comparison to others

Actually, I think this does touch on my motivations. I do value my own success in comparison to others. Not because I want to be above them just to be above them, but because I value my personal success on being in positions in which my actions can positively affect the most people. This is why my demeanor aims towards leadership. As a squad leader I can help my soldiers pass their PT tests if they are falling behind. As a lab manager, I can ensure all of the MAs are following proper protocol and we aren't decreasing patient care/prognosis. And so on. It is less about me doing well so I can be the 'best', it is about me being the 'best' so I can do well by those I can help. (that is, again, really poor wording...)

think your idea of focusing simply on your own successes and experiences rather than saying "compared to my peers" or talking about positions of authority/leadership

With the definition of success that I have set forth above, how do you think this can be addressed? If I say the role I was in then the people I helped areassumed, if I talk about the people I have helped then it comes off as just trying to flaunt altruism. I am just unsure.

Consider that your definition of success may be different from others'

Most certainly.

people who are more introverted and private, may all have strengths and skills that you don't have, but are extremely valuable.

Everyone brings something new to the table and we are ALL valuable with no one intrinsically being more-or-less valuable than anyone else. I know I am difficult at understanding things from other cultural perspectives, so I highly value a multi-cultural team for many perspectives. This is just one example, but you are 10000000% correct. This is the topic of like 2/3s of my secondary essays is that of teamwork, value of differing perspectives, etc.

So I think it might help you to show that you understand a broader definition of what it means to be successful, or what traits/experiences can bring value to a team, workplace, or relationship.

My personal definition of success =/= success. I want to be in a position where I can positively benefit the most people while maintaining adequate connection with my family. Someone else may only want to stop once they reach the top program at the top academic institution. Someone else very well may just want to be a PCP in their hometown.I wholly understand, respect, and value other's definitions of success. That is why, until now, I have not said I am successful. I have said I have likely done more, but that is to convey the generic sense of 'success.'Which is not necessarily one that I particularly value. I am self aware of my own accomplishments but accomplishments =/= success. Success is an internal feeling. I guess I didn't really take in to account that others may think I am saying I am more successful then them? Because I am most certainly not. I, and no one, is ever in any position to say they are better than you. No one should ever, with intent, make others feel less than. I wasn't aware that I was or could do that without intent. I guess that is a point of naivety that I need to work on. Thank you for addressing it!

think the general consensus is that you should avoid saying what others may perceive as arrogance. Definitely don’t try to one-up someone’s experiences and values during an interview, like some people like to do.

What you quotedwas intended as a joke based on how preposterous it sounds lol My bad...

 

[907914]

Bold/underline: Could they have put just as much effort or even less effort as you and were just better? Just playing a little devils advocate here.

By all means! Whatever position someone ends up in based on whatever amount of effort, they deserve whatever successes they come by!

 

[907914]

bro you seem like the dude who tries to kill people when shaking hands, then trap them in a one-sided conversation for a half hour while they make lame excuses to leave

I totally get that. I do have a lot of one sided conversations, but even more so I will have conversations that last for hours on end with complete strangers. I am always here to talk, and if the other person is going to talk then I am always here to listen. Whatever role serves best.

On the note of the handshake, I have a firm grip but tiny hands. They cancel each other out in perfect handshake balance lol

 

[deleted972488]

This is that rubbing the wrong way. The context of 'not falling behind' is in what I aim myself towards. I don't know if I would be good at economics or 20th century literature, but those are irrelevant as I have never and will never try anything along those lines. And I am not number one at anything, I will likely never be the best at anything. I can only ever be the best me that i can be. I will PM you later if you would like to talk further.

I wasn’t saying you were falling behind. I was saying that there are many qualified candidates out there. I think the interviewing experience may be very humbling. There are people out there with interesting stories and accomplishments - I think even just interacting with people on here like you has shown me that.

Some of your posts in this thread are suggesting you are going into this thinking you are better than many of the other applicants. I’m trying to say that’s not the best attitude to have and will come across poorly in interviews. Anyone interviewing for medical school is already exceptional and especially at the schools to which you’re applying. Right now you’re a big fish in a small pond, but there are many other big fish out there. Be confident, but know that there are people who are there with you who are just as amazing as you. In some ways, they will be more amazing. In other ways, you may be more amazing.

 

[Angus Avagadro]

Collegiality, the ability to disagree agreeably, and present yourself as a consultant is a HUGE part of being a physician. You frequently discuss patients in a multidisciplinary setting and collegiality is very important as opinions on management may vary.
When I interview a group, I look to see if anyone interupts another candidate. I also ask an open ended question and take the opposite view. If I frustrate you and you become aggressive or unprofessional, it would not be a very successful interview for you.
Be respectful of other candidates, and be calm and professional when advancing your point of you. Your military experience can assure this. Thank you for your service. Good luck and best wishes.

 

[907914]

I think the interviewing experience may be very humbling.

I am genuinely hoping so! I love reading the WAMC threads and seeing such diversity in experiences and backgrounds! Mine is only one path to medicine and there are many MANY MAAANNNNYYY more people who have MUCH more impressive applications. I am just a do gooder from upper middle class background that joined the military because my high school grades were ****. Many more people deserve so much more recognition.

thinking you are better than many of the other applicants.

I recognize I am giving off that vibe now. I genuinely just didn’t see it that way. I was merely approaching myself from a statistical perspective, not even taking in to account how I was coming off. That is my bad and I want to make it clear that I as an applicant and as a person am no better than anyone else and I fully recognize that.

Be confident, but know that there are people who are there with you who are just as amazing as you. In some ways, they will be more amazing. In other ways, you may be more amazing.

As I said, I hope so!

 

[helpmeout441]

ya dude you need to tone it down, at least for the interview. Not to stomp on your party but your stats are good but not crazy good. Like from my class this year, at least 10 of us are 4.0/525+ with heavy research, clinical experience, volunteering, multiple publications, etc... There are always going to be people better than you. Perhaps this will open your eyes a little bit to the competition.

 

[TelemarketingEnigma]

I just want to start by saying that I appreciate the fact that you are seeking and being open to feedback in this thread, and I hope you get value from it.

A lot of people in this thread have described a "step up, step back" approach to group discussions and activities. I strongly second this approach. It doesn't just mean the amount of time you spend talking, either - try to pay attention to how much of the time you are talking about/keeping the focus on yourself. Is it a lot of the time? Are you constantly trying to bring it back to your accomplishments when conversation shifts to other topics? try letting the focus shift back towards other people/topics for a while.

I am used to being in positions of leadership and/or assuming a dominant role, so in peer-to-peer situations that do not have a hierarchy/shouldn't have a hierarchy this is where I falter.

Dominance =/= leadership. Some of the best leaders I have known spend most of their time silently listening to those lower in the hierarchy than they are.

I don't know if I would be good at economics or 20th century literature, but those are irrelevant as I have never and will never try anything along those lines.

Statements like this make you appear dismissive of others accomplishments, when its not something you're able to bring back to yourself. I could do the same thing: "I don't know if I would be a good military leader, but that's irrelevant because I will never try anything along those lines." Show interest in other people's accomplishments! Especially if it's something you haven't tried/couldn't do! I may not have your MCAT score or military experience, but I can guarantee you that I've accomplished some pretty cool things, some of which helped me get into med school and others that just generally help me feel fulfilled as a human being. If I wanted to, I could list them all and put them on a hierarchy against your accomplishments. But I won't because I recognize that everyone has different standards of success, and succeeds in different things, which often aren't comparable.

Finally, your MCAT score really doesn't matter in the interview room or once you get to med school. I couldn't tell you what any of my fellow interviewees scores were, or what any of my current classmates scores were. I couldn't even tell you who our top scorers on exams are. But I can tell you all about their other cool accomplishments - things like economics or 20th century literature or other cool, interesting things they've succeeded at.

 

[907914]

525+

So, statistically each year there will only be around 100 people with higher than a 525....So if you attend an institution that produces 10% of all of the super high stats folks then that is an anomaly. A cool anomaly, but an anomaly nonetheless.

But when did I ever bring up my stats? Like, I stress out over my lowish cGPA on the daily. I don't care about my stats. Seriously though...When do I ever brag about stats? I recognize the show-offiness of me talking about my activities/accomplishments etc.but I tend to be pretty humble (and even worried) with my stats.

 

[907914]

Statements like this make you appear dismissive of others accomplishments,

First off, thank you for the feedback! I will take the step-up, step-back approach to heart.

I did not mean to write off the accomplishments of economics, 20th century literature or the like. The dismissive nature was intended, but it was dismissive of the topics as far as my pursuit/probably not being good in them. I do not intend to dismiss the subjects altogether! Whatever passions others seek to pursue that is fantastic that they are pursuing their passions! I personally engage in NPR, Vox, SciShow, Atlas Pro etc. as pursuits of the YouTube nature because I absolutely adore listening to and understanding the achievements and struggles of others across varying fields. There are many many fields I have no/little exposure to and will gladly try to learn more about. Others are superb in those roles and that is fantastic.

 

[907914]

Finally, your MCAT score really doesn't matter in the interview room or once you get to med school. I couldn't tell you what any of my fellow interviewees scores were, or what any of my current classmates scores were.

But yah, as far as the MCAT score in the interview room I totally know that doesn't matter. I know that everyone in that room is worthy of being there, because getting selected for interview means ADCOMs think you are academically qualified and I as a lowly premed know nothing of what their criteria are.

 

[TelemarketingEnigma]

First off, thank you for the feedback! I will take the step-up, step-back approach to heart.

I did not mean to write off the accomplishments of economics, 20th century literature or the like. The dismissive nature was intended, but it was dismissive of the topics as far as my pursuit/probably not being good in them. I do not intend to dismiss the subjects altogether! Whatever passions others seek to pursue that is fantastic that they are pursuing their passions! I personally engage in NPR, Vox, SciShow, Atlas Pro etc. as pursuits of the YouTube nature because I absolutely adore listening to and understanding the achievements and struggles of others across varying fields. There are many many fields I have no/little exposure to and will gladly try to learn more about. Others are superb in those roles and that is fantastic.

It's not just that those are interesting topics that you should appreciate... it's that maybe, those achievements (if you were to rank everybody's achievements, which is dumb, but I'm using it to illustrate a point) might just rank above some of the achievements you keep bragging about. Sure, you've been in the military - that's a great sacrifice, and something that adcoms consider highly. But I have classmates who competed in athletics in international competitions, or who were involved in incredible organizing work around social issues back at home, or who poured their hearts into their classrooms for years as teachers, or who've made a name for themselves in the performing arts... You keep claiming that you just happen to have better ECs than all these other applicants - but why do you think your accomplishments are better than these? I'm hoping you can think about this a little bit, and realize that you've probably only met a small slice of premeds, and you're going to meet people with some incredible ECs on the interview trail, who have experiences that don't compare directly to yours but could (from certain perspectives) be considered "better."

 

[907914]

who have experiences that don't compare directly to yours but could (from certain perspectives) be considered "better.

GOOOOOOTCHA. It is in the word choice I am choosing to utilize.

I personally value what I have done and thus feel comfortable talking about it. But you are correct, to prioritize or ‘rank’ ECs is idiotic. Everyone values what they do and I should value what they have done because they are proud of their own accomplishments. Right on.

There are people on the interview trail who will blow me out of the water. But, as you say, that is all relative.

To be honest and frank, I actually didn’t think much of my ECs in the grand scheme of things until SDN reinforced it. I personally don’t think I am anything special and it has only been specifically from SDN members telling me I had what ADCOMs wanted that buffed my ego.

 

[jamaica jan sun princess]

So, statistically each year there will only be around 100 people with higher than a 525....So if you attend an institution that produces 10% of all of the super high stats folks then that is an anomaly. A cool anomaly, but an anomaly nonetheless.

I'm pretty sure something like 600 per year score 524 and up.

 

[TelemarketingEnigma]

To be honest and frank, I actually didn’t think much of my ECs in the grand scheme of things until SDN reinforced it. I personally don’t think I am anything special and it has only been specifically from SDN members telling me I had what ADCOMs wanted that buffed my ego.

This is one of those "SDN is not the real world" moments 🙂

SDN represents a very narrow spectrum of applicants. Once you get to interviews and med school, you'll meet a few of the stats focused, uninvolved types that seem to frequent SDN, but you'll also find that most of your classmates are really cool, interesting, accomplished people with cool life stories and many things to teach you. They may not be perfect applicants on paper or when described in a short WAMC post, but I've honestly been blown away but how incredible all of my classmates are.

 

[The Deep]

I'm pretty sure something like 600 per year score 524 and up.

I was told that SDN overvalues Americorps, Peace Corps, and military service. One of my advisors was actually telling me that some adcoms may question you on your morals if you were active in Iraq/Afghanistan. But then again, my advisors have been really iffy...

 

[TelemarketingEnigma]

I was told that SDN overvalues Americorps, Peace Corps, and military service. One of my advisors was actually telling me that some adcoms may question you on your morals if you were active in Iraq/Afghanistan. But then again, my advisors have been really iffy...

(pretty sure you meant to quote me, not the quote about 524 MCAT scores)

I think its probably because Peace corp, military service, or americorp are impressive ECs that are also something that the average premed could actually consider joining, if they wished. You can't recommend someone beef up their application by just applying to become an international level athlete, etc. I will say that I have several classmates who did Peace Corps and Americorps (none that I'm aware of with previous military though). I don't know if their Peace Corps/Americorps experiences helped them get into med school, but it does give them some pretty interesting stories to tell.

 

[faerie62]

I'm pretty sure that most of the multi-person interviews are based on a prompt/question that you and your group must discuss. Maybe even a game that you play with another person (which is NOT about winning). It has nothing to do with your stats or ECs, unless you did something that directly relates to that prompt and can contribute positively without dominating the discussion. Mostly you should not be bringing up your background at all. It's all about how you relate to and work with people in the moment. In this respect this is kind of hard to practice/prepare for because how you are as a person is not going to just change overnight -- but changing your perspective on the talents and experiences that other applicants may bring is a good start.
During lunch/icebreakers/whatever that's on you, just relax but make sure the things you say are appropriate and professional. Don't talk about the MCAT with other interviewees, cuz that's just weird man. Get to know the culture of the school and the people you might be going to school with. Most likely you won't be evaluated unless you say or do something truly atrocious.

 

[907914]

I'm pretty sure something like 600 per year score 524 and up.

Nah, only 80,000 test takers every year and 525 is 0.09%, 526 is 0.06%, 527 is 0.03% and 528 is like 0.015%. So around 160 test takers annually are 525+. 800 annually are 520+.

 

[jamaica jan sun princess]

Nah, only 80,000 test takers every year and 525 is 0.09%, 526 is 0.06%, 527 is 0.03% and 528 is like 0.015%. So around 160 test takers annually are 525+. 800 annually are 520+.

AAMC's statistics state that 184,00 took it from 2015 to 2017, so about 60,000 a year and 1% score 524 or higher. 1% of 60,000 is like 600, no?

I scraped by with B's in statistics several years ago, so I could be interpreting it incorrectly.

 

[helpmeout441]

AAMC's statistics state that 184,00 took it from 2015 to 2017, so about 60,000 a year and 1% score 524 or higher. 1% of 60,000 is like 600, no?

I scraped by with B's in statistics several years ago, so I could be interpreting it incorrectly.

Here is the most recent data. AAMC doesn't release the exact percentage for each score (528, 527, etc) as far as I'm aware.

https://aamc-orange.global.ssl.fastly.net/production/media/filer_public/be/28/be28698f-3195-4db0-9377-ef95d5377217/mcat_total_and_section_score_percentile_ranks_2019_for_web.pdf

 

[helpmeout441]

So, statistically each year there will only be around 100 people with higher than a 525....So if you attend an institution that produces 10% of all of the super high stats folks then that is an anomaly. A cool anomaly, but an anomaly nonetheless.

But when did I ever bring up my stats? Like, I stress out over my lowish cGPA on the daily. I don't care about my stats. Seriously though...When do I ever brag about stats? I recognize the show-offiness of me talking about my activities/accomplishments etc.but I tend to be pretty humble (and even worried) with my stats.

Yes I'm at a top 10 private undergrad so it's totally possible.

I haven't read your other posts on SDN so idk what you usually brag about. Even if you are bragging about your activites/extracurriculars, there are people better than you. Not to be harsh but this is just a fact lol. A couple of my friends applying this cycle have pubs in nature and NEJM. You're gonna meet a lot of strong people at interviews. Literally all you have to do is just behave like a normal human being. You don't have to impress anyone there, they just want to see that you're a person who gets along with others.

 

[907914]

AAMC's statistics state that 184,00 took it from 2015 to 2017, so about 60,000 a year and 1% score 524 or higher. 1% of 60,000 is like 600, no?

I scraped by with B's in statistics several years ago, so I could be interpreting it incorrectly.

Nah, 1% score higher than 520. 520 is the 99%, 524+ is the 100%. The exact percentages are derived from assumptions about a standard derivation (area under the curve).

 

[907914]

I don't know if their Peace Corps/Americorps experiences helped them get into med school, but it does give them some pretty interesting stories to tell.

This. I didn’t really do much specifically for my job in the military, but the stories I can tell from it are fairly novel. By no means unique or better than much of the other stuff I will see on the interview trail. But it is stuff to talk about, none the less.

Don't talk about the MCAT with other interviewees,

Where does everyone keep getting this idea I want to talk about my MCAT in interviews? That is weird. The stats get you in the door, what you do once your there has nothing to do with stats. I fully understand that.

Even if you are bragging about your activites/extracurriculars, there are people better than you.

It is not so much bragging as literally just being vocal, capable, and willing to talk about what I have done. And there probably are a lot of people ‘better’ than me, but like....^^^^there is the whole conversation about not making ranks and tiers of who-done-its just right there. I realize my mistake.

I unfortunately have no publications due to Podunk U, least of which would be NEJM. That doesn’t lessen the value of my humanitarian work, community outreach, or other experiences. As I have said across these forums, it isn’t a competition.

Edit: But thank you for the advice Either way.

 

[Alex1234*]

This thread is exhausting. If you truly find yourself excelling ahead of others all the time...then you should be smart enough to act accordingly on interview day. I’m sure you’ll be fine

 

[deleted804295]

No offense, but based off your (very frequent) posts on this forum, you really come off as the quintessential gunner. A personality is not something easy to change.

I'm not sure why during this time of the year we get a lot of posters that find it okay to take jabs at users here. That is not okay.

@MemeLord You are a breath of fresh air here. You are very zealous but also very kind. Appreciate having you here.

 

[deleted804295]

You could just, you know, be yourself and let interviewers/colleagues/peers decide for themselves if you’re a fit. Don’t really see the use in pretending or putting a show on. If you’re arrogant, you’re arrogant, and it’ll show one way or the other. Maybe some schools will dig it, others won’t. I don’t really get the whole “I know I’m very full of myself and an over-achiever, but how do I avoid coming off this way” short answer: you don’t. It’s your personality. Just own it and be yourself. Can’t imagine a facade holding over too long for the rest of your life while living your career out.

Is this is the interview advice you give to quiet or timid people?

'Yeah, you're quiet and timid, just be like that during the entire interview.'

 

[Matthew9Thirtyfive]

I was told that SDN overvalues Americorps, Peace Corps, and military service. One of my advisors was actually telling me that some adcoms may question you on your morals if you were active in Iraq/Afghanistan. But then again, my advisors have been really iffy...

(pretty sure you meant to quote me, not the quote about 524 MCAT scores)

I think its probably because Peace corp, military service, or americorp are impressive ECs that are also something that the average premed could actually consider joining, if they wished. You can't recommend someone beef up their application by just applying to become an international level athlete, etc. I will say that I have several classmates who did Peace Corps and Americorps (none that I'm aware of with previous military though). I don't know if their Peace Corps/Americorps experiences helped them get into med school, but it does give them some pretty interesting stories to tell.

At every single one of my interviews (and the interviews of my military friends with whom I discussed it), being in the military was talked about very highly and actually got us out of many of the standard questions about leadership and integrity because they assumed that military experience automatically implied those things. I was thanked for my service by every interviewer and asked about my experiences. One interviewer just wanted to hear sea stories for half the interview.

I have a lot of accomplishments that are considered excellent ECs, and I maintain that the military is the best thing I’ve done. People who serve in the military literally put their lives on the line for millions of people they will never meet. It’s volunteer service, leadership, teamwork, mentoring, performance under pressure, sacrifice, etc. all in one.

The point of this isn’t to dismiss other ECs. I met a professional soccer player at an interview, and that is an amazing EC because of how much hard work and dedication it takes to do that, not to mention teamwork. The only point I’m trying to make is that I don’t think SDN overvalued military experience. I’m sure there is a minority of adcoms who are unable to recognize their cognitive biases and can’t separate the war from the soldier, but I think they are a small minority.

 

[Matthew9Thirtyfive]

I'm not sure why during this time of the year we get a lot of posters that find it okay to take jabs at users here. That is not okay.

@MemeLord You are a breath of fresh air here. You are very zealous but also very kind. Appreciate having you here.

Tbf, he asked for feedback about his personality.

 

[deleted804295]

@MemeLord You got a lot of great advice from carcinoma, cj_cregg, and aldol to name a few.

I know from my interactions with you that you are not a malicious person. Being zealous and excited is a good thing and I would not tone this down unless it is being abrasive towards your fellow interviewees or annoying towards faculty/staff during interviews.

What I will repeat as what others have said is that while your accomplishments are amazing, talking about them in such a casual manner and comparing it to others will paint you into a person that you're not- namely an aggressive over achieving gunner.

Seriously remind yourself on the interview trail that you're competing against the best students in the world. While many students won't outright say it, you may find yourself next to Rhodes Scholars or Olympic champions. Your excellence is clearly shown but the world need not know it. The only individuals who need to know it are your interviewers. If you start haphazardly throwing around your accomplishments and using it to compare yourself to others you will meet great difficulty.

 

[Matthew9Thirtyfive]

@MemeLord You got a lot of great advice from carcinoma, cj_cregg, and aldol to name a few.

I know from my interactions with you that you are not a malicious person. Being zealous and excited is a good thing and I would not tone this down unless it is being abrasive towards your fellow interviewees or annoying towards faculty/staff during interviews.

What I will repeat as what others have said is that while your accomplishments are amazing, talking about them in such a casual manner and comparing it to others will paint you into a person that you're not- namely an aggressive over achieving gunner.

Seriously remind yourself on the interview trail that you're competing against the best students in the world. While many students won't outright say it, you may find yourself next to Rhodes Scholars or Olympic champions. Your excellence is clearly shown but the world need not know it. The only individuals who need to know it are your interviewers. If you start haphazardly throwing around your accomplishments and using it to compare yourself to others you will meet great difficulty.

Good post. No one likes a story topper or a humble bragger.

 

[gonnif]

My brilliant, high stat reapplicant this past term, who had interviewed multiple times across two cycles, was tall, imposing, ROTC type who answered far too much "YES SIR" "NO MA'AM" like a nice Southern-raised boy should. I had to intentionally soften his style for his third and successful cycle

 

[Deecee2DO]

No offense taken!

You know, it is funny that you say this as, at least from my lived experiences, I am anything but a gunner. I didn’t even think of medicine as a career until I was 19, didn’t even officially start as a premed until I was 22. A gunner aims for the top (hence, they are ‘gunning’) and tries their hardest to get there. I don’t try to end up at the top, I just tend to find myself there.

My professors think I am being full of myself when I say “I don’t care about getting a good grade, I care about learning the material.” And then they see me in class asking **** loads of questions and it is like...yah, I just want to learn lol

dude youre 100% a gunner. Tone it down 100 notches for your interview or youre gonna be unhappy with the consequences. You dont need to bigdick everyone. Just be friendly and outgoing which Im sure you know how to do and let your application do the talking when it comes to accompishments

 

[mmchick]

I think you misunderstand my intent. I am not trying to develop a facade. I want to better manage how I act for the sake of personal and professional development. You are right, a facade cannot be kept up for long.

Actual question + TL;DR - Being a typically dominant personality, how would y’all recommend toning it down so that I can still convey that I think I am a great applicant while also not coming off “too aggressive” and rub someone (an interviewer) the wrong way?

Considering your initial post was asking for advice on how to "tone down" your personality, I would say your sole intent in this entire thread has been a fishing expedition for others' ideas on how you can best tell adcoms/your peers how "number 1 or close to it" you "naturally" are without how blatantly, arrogantly sounding that is damaging your reputation/chances of getting into that school. This would be a facade. If you want to go in there flexing on how your experiences have by far surpassed that of your competitors, "therefore take me in because I will always be the natural lead 'curve-setter' of the pack and given my amazing track record, have no doubt I'll cure all cancer and solve world hunger nonchalantly as I fall into the leadership positions to make those things happen", then just do it. Again, let everyone else decide if they want to put up with that.

I think you've got a bad case of the cognitive dissonance in that you recognize how arrogant you are because it seems (from your posts, anyway) you haven't had to face much upward adversity and are scrambling now because obviously that will not bode over well when it comes to interviews/having to cooperate in a peer-to-peer environment all throughout your medical career. I don't think there's much of a way to convince people that you're not trying to diminish the accomplishments of others, but you just always seem to find that yours far surpasses theirs when you then keep following up responses with stating how naturally superior you are without much effort.

So I'll repeat, probably best to really take in everything everyone has said regarding how you come off arrogant and try to truly reflect on that in past experiences to see if it is perspective-changing at all. If not, then own your personality for what it is and go into interviews being yourself. No other way around it.

Maybe it would be refreshing to remember that medicine is literally servitude. Doctors are nothing more than hyped up health consultants with the patient being in charge at the end of the day. Your whole life will be subordinate to that of your patient and you will just be providing your best advice, hoping they take it at the end of the day. Not really the best field for flexing how much of a 'natural superior leader and person' you are on a new mom diagnosed with Stage IV ovarian cancer.

 

[Dr panda]

A bit off the topic, but one extremely popular mistake that poor interviewees make is trying to answer questions you were not asked, just because one really wants to tell about something. May be it's useful 🙂 (man, we want that frog back)

 

[907914]

Your whole life will be subordinate to that of your patient and you will just be providing your best advice, hoping they take it at the end of the day. Not really the best field for flexing how much of a 'natural superior leader and person' you are on a new mom diagnosed with Stage IV ovarian cancer.

I think I said this earlier in the thread, but I don’t want to pursue leadership positions so that I can be better than others. I do it so that I can have the largest positive effect on the most people. Because, at the end of the day, those who I care for and those under my responsibility are why I am doing what I am doing. I don’t think I will cure cancer/end world hunger/etc. Maybe I will, who knows? But being the best isn’t my goal. Just doing right by those I care for.

The cognitive dissonance is A+ present. I recognize I come off as arrogant when I talk about myself, and that is why a group interview environment is intimidating to me. Because I typically don’t talk about myself to others because I know I come off sounding like I think I m better than them. Funny enough, this format actually showed me I have been wrong. I need to be able to talk about myself and talking about myself is the only way to improve the way in which I do that.

 

[deleted972488]

Considering your initial post was asking for advice on how to "tone down" your personality, I would say your sole intent in this entire thread has been a fishing expedition for others' ideas on how you can best tell adcoms/your peers how "number 1 or close to it" you "naturally" are without how blatantly, arrogantly sounding that is damaging your reputation/chances of getting into that school. This would be a facade. If you want to go in there flexing on how your experiences have by far surpassed that of your competitors, "therefore take me in because I will always be the natural lead 'curve-setter' of the pack and given my amazing track record, have no doubt I'll cure all cancer and solve world hunger nonchalantly as I fall into the leadership positions to make those things happen", then just do it. Again, let everyone else decide if they want to put up with that.

I think you've got a bad case of the cognitive dissonance in that you recognize how arrogant you are because it seems (from your posts, anyway) you haven't had to face much upward adversity and are scrambling now because obviously that will not bode over well when it comes to interviews/having to cooperate in a peer-to-peer environment all throughout your medical career. I don't think there's much of a way to convince people that you're not trying to diminish the accomplishments of others, but you just always seem to find that yours far surpasses theirs when you then keep following up responses with stating how naturally superior you are without much effort.

So I'll repeat, probably best to really take in everything everyone has said regarding how you come off arrogant and try to truly reflect on that in past experiences to see if it is perspective-changing at all. If not, then own your personality for what it is and go into interviews being yourself. No other way around it.

Maybe it would be refreshing to remember that medicine is literally servitude. Doctors are nothing more than hyped up health consultants with the patient being in charge at the end of the day. Your whole life will be subordinate to that of your patient and you will just be providing your best advice, hoping they take it at the end of the day. Not really the best field for flexing how much of a 'natural superior leader and person' you are on a new mom diagnosed with Stage IV ovarian cancer.

To some extent, we are all putting on an act during interviews. We want to lead with our best foot forward and give a good impression. Sometimes I have imposter syndrome, but should I let this show during interviews? Probably not.

OP needs a perspective change (I am interviewing alongside some the best and brightest vs. I am the best and brightest out of everyone here), not a personality change.

 

[907914]

To some extent, we are all putting on an act during interviews. We want to lead with our best foot forward and give a good impression. Sometimes I have imposter syndrome, but should I let this show during interviews? Probably not.

OP needs a perspective change (I am interviewing alongside some the best and brightest vs. I am the best and brightest out of everyone here), not a personality change.

I have previously lied in this thread. I will need a facade in interviews. One that doesn’t say **** or **** or any other expletive in casual conversation.

 

[Lucca]

I’ve met many people with similar strong personalities on the interview trail. Many have given excellent advice already. What I have to add, if anything, is that many people need to rly learn listening skills. A lot of people think they are good listeners. But sometimes good listening skills also demand that you don’t reply to something, admit ignorance, or say nothing at all. Frankly, in particular men need to learn good listening skills, speaking as a man and including myself. Sometimes people are going to say something and it’s going to sound like they are challenging you, your background, etc and it will make you uncomfortable. White men especially tend to overreact and derail the conversation when social justice topics come up (and they will come up over and over again), probably out of some innate ego defense to try to show that they, specifically, are not responsible for a problem being discussed and it can be really unproductive for the conversation and uncomfortable for everyone. I’m not saying white men should never speak in SJ related discussions but be mindful if you do that you actually have something concrete to contribute and not trying to make it a “not all [blank]” or “pick-me” type of deal.

On the trail you may be in situations, probably during group activities or interviews where you will have to follow and you need to show that you’re good at following. Military people tend to be very good at this naturally, but something I’ve noticed is that when the person assigned the leader activity is very shy, soft spoken, meek, etc. a lot of people will try to effectively usurp the leadership role and start giving orders. This is not a good look imo. You need to bring out the leader in other people, which I think is a skill military people also tend to be very good at, but at the same time with the competitive nature of the interview process this might quickly turn into subconsciously throwing someone else under the bus or bulldozing them and this won’t help u.

 

[Lucca]

Basically interviews are not a time to debate or try to invalidate other peoples perspectives/experiences, esp wrt other applicants. The challenge of having a strong personality as you say is having enough humility to recognize that when there is a sense of contention you just have to represent yourself as best as you can and not be in the mindset of competing with others even though you are quite literally competing of course.

Obviously in a one on one interview setting feel free to disagree as strongly (but intelligently and politely ofc) as you want and make the best case for yourself.

 

[deleted972488]

SDN members telling me I had what ADCOMs wanted that buffed my ego

 

[Deecee2DO]

I’ve met many people with similar strong personalities on the interview trail. Many have given excellent advice already. What I have to add, if anything, is that many people need to rly learn listening skills. A lot of people think they are good listeners. But sometimes good listening skills also demand that you don’t reply to something, admit ignorance, or say nothing at all. Frankly, in particular men need to learn good listening skills, speaking as a man and including myself. Sometimes people are going to say something and it’s going to sound like they are challenging you, your background, etc and it will make you uncomfortable. White men especially tend to overreact and derail the conversation when social justice topics come up (and they will come up over and over again), probably out of some innate ego defense to try to show that they, specifically, are not responsible for a problem being discussed and it can be really unproductive for the conversation and uncomfortable for everyone. I’m not saying white men should never speak in SJ related discussions but be mindful if you do that you actually have something concrete to contribute and not trying to make it a “not all [blank]” or “pick-me” type of deal.

On the trail you may be in situations, probably during group activities or interviews where you will have to follow and you need to show that you’re good at following. Military people tend to be very good at this naturally, but something I’ve noticed is that when the person assigned the leader activity is very shy, soft spoken, meek, etc. a lot of people will try to effectively usurp the leadership role and start giving orders. This is not a good look imo. You need to bring out the leader in other people, which I think is a skill military people also tend to be very good at, but at the same time with the competitive nature of the interview process this might quickly turn into subconsciously throwing someone else under the bus or bulldozing them and this won’t help u.

are you white?

 

[907914]

are you white?

This ****s not devolving in to a URM debate. Stop now.

 

[Deecee2DO]

This ****s not devolving in to a URM debate. Stop now.

relax buddy

 

[deleted804295]

are you white?

Why does it matter?

 

[Deecee2DO]

Why does it matter?

idk does it?

 

[deleted804295]

lol. Go to sociopolitical pls. This is the premed subforum.

I dont agree with some of what Lucca said but that doesn't mean you can start throwing out race baits and political traps.

 

[deleted972488]

White men especially tend to overreact and derail the conversation when social justice topics come up

Y'all are proving Lucca's point by overreacting and derailing this conversation.