Telling my boss??

[lessismoe]

Hey all,

I was hoping you could give me your opinions. At what point do you think I should make it known at work that I am applying to med school? You see, the person who had this job before me applied, and he never got in, so I don't want to tell everyone and not get in... the job would be cursed!! Heck, it may already be cursed... In any case, when and how do you think I should tell people? I know for a fact that my boss will be pissed. Thanks for your input!

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[lyragrl]

Umm. If your boss will be pissed, I'd tell them after you are admitted but--if possible--at least 6-8 weeks before your expected departure so they'll have time to fill the position.

 

[Arista.MD]

I told my boss, he got pissed. I thought it was fair for him to know that I will not be here for ever. He won't even talk to me right now.
I did not get a LOR from him.

 

[DrWuStar]

don't say anything. my closest friend at my job applied last year and our boss treated her badly from the moment he found out until about 2 days before she left (when he started kissing her @ss, presumably in hopes htat she wouldn't tell HR how horrible he had been during her "exit interview")

after witnessing that, no way am i going to tell him that i am appyling. i won't even mention it when (if) i get in. not until i give my two weeks notice.

i have heard many other stories of bosses treating people differently if not outright badly once they know this.

PS: my boss is just jealous cause he got rejected from med school three years in a row and now works in middle management. i would feel sorry for him except that he's a jerk.

 

[thackl]

Wow, you guys have it tough. My boss was great and wrote an awesome letter. But then again, I was an engineer and none of my management had shattered medical dreams.

I you know the guy will be an ass about it, then definitely don't tell. If you think they will be cool, then ask for an LOR and a layoff if they plan to downsize in the near future.

 

[thackl]

Originally posted by thackl
Wow, you guys have it tough. My boss was great and wrote an awesome letter. But then again, I was an engineer and none of my management had shattered medical dreams.

If you know the guy will be an ass about it, then definitely don't tell. If you think they will be cool, then ask for an LOR and a layoff if they plan to downsize in the near future.

 

[lessismoe]

Yeah, see, stories like that make me want to keep it from everyone until I get in...

I am SOOOO at the point where I just want to quit today, though. Grr... I got FULL ON YELLED AT for something I had nothing to do with.

"eet is ooltimately yhore fu@keeng reesponseebeeleetee!!"

And yet, when he finally found out whose fu@keeng reesponseebeeleetee it really was (ahem, a long time friend of his who, IMHO, is a fu@keeng deadweight), he didn't even talk to him about it. No, he just fires the guy's assistant.

Yes, NEVER get a job with a famous scientist. It sucks, and they throw tantrums. No, I won't be getting any LORs from him. Heck, even before this particular incident, I didn't have enough respect for him to ask.

I am so tempted to say something really unwise when I leave, be it now or whenever I get into med school. I mean, really, there are better ways to earn $2K/month. Grumble grumble......

 

[thackl]

Don't burn any bridges or put black marks on your record. You will be treated like this as a student and a young resident.

 

[sgilani]

geez, what kind of dictators do you people work for?

 

[Ryo-Ohki]

What happened to the guy before you who failed?

 

[lessismoe]

He went to grad school, and did very well for himself. I really have no idea why he didn't get in anywhere. He was a cool guy, and smart/hardworking too.

 

[BananaSplit]

I just graduated from college this past spring, and I started looking for a job, but nobody would hire me when I told them that I was applying to medical school. Many people in biotech told me that it would better just not to say anything about it, but it kept coming up during interviews (eg. where do you see yourself in two years?) and I didn't want to lie about it or be as ambiguous as possible like some people suggested. But finally, I got this great lab job. The people are super-friendly and my boss already knows about me applying for medical school. Heck, she even gave me tips on where to stay in certain cities and stuff.

I guess this story is irrelevant to the question at hand, but I just wanted to assure people out there that not all researchers are jackasses.

I've got a question for those of you who have bosses from hell. How are you planning to explain the days you take off for interviews?

BananaSplit

 

[*hopefully*]

My boss knew from the very start that I was applying to med school, and he was always supportive. But then again, I did work for an MD. I think it is really inconsiderate to just surprise your employer with a 2 weeks notice. That would definitely burn a bridge. At least a 4 weeks notice I think is fair

 

[missbonnie]

Hi-

I've wrote about this before..but I'll repeat here cuz I think it's relevant. I was working at an investment bank in IT. I took the mcat in april 2002 and after a week of mcat class I knew i couldnt work full time and study for the mcat properly. I told my boss that I was studying for the mcat and needed to go part time somehow, AND I told him that I would be leaving the company in a year or so to go to medical school. Before this, I talked to HR about going part time and my options in general. My boss not only supported me, he helped me get approval to go part time for 2 months AND keep my full time pay/benefits. I was working in a computer group which required weekend on-call rotations. My coworkers pitched in and took my weekends for me for the 2 months so that I could study.

Bottom line - if you are passionate about something and be straight with your boss about it, you never know what can happen. Most ppl never go after your dreams, you pursuing yours may inspire the ppl around you.

bonnie

 

[rjmst]

tell him at the same time you tell him you're gay.

 

[Paws]

I think each case is going to be different and you gotta just suss each one out.

I've worked for well-known researchers where I thought I was going to scream, they were so &*^ weird. I've also had the trauma of not getting jobs in reseaqrch because people said: are you going to medical school (I would like to ... ) and I would fluff it, and they would say - you like like you are so forget it !

I've also had bosses be very supportive. People are a mixed bunch and you just never know. Even among my friends I've noticed a real hostility on the part of some old friends, and then real enthusiasm by others.

I try and keep my cards close to my chest and only be honest with people who seem like they will be supportive. It is no picnic to be abused by people who for some reason are not happy for you ...

 

[Anka]

lessismoe, you shouldn't let anyone treat you like that. If you've been working for him a bit, you should have enough skills to make yourself valueable to someone else. There's no need to remain in an abusive work environment. Just don't tell him you've got a new job until two weeks before you plan on leaving (to heck with him having to fill the frickin position). As far as being treated like that as a student and resident, the people who generally get treated like that are the ones who look like easy targets (walk with their heads down, take lots of ****). So, get used to sticking up for yourself now.

BTW, I'd avoid screaming matches. It doesn't help. Just get yourself out of there -- and 2K/mo is *not* worth it. What I usually do if someone is getting in my face is tell them to hold on a minute, go and get a chair, and stand up on it, and then let them try to keep yelling (I'm a pretty petite woman). Guys have a real hard time yelling *up*. Of course, he might stalk off mumbling obsentities, but... eh, who cares?

Another trick that works real well, especially for women (which you may or may not be, but it works when you're junior, too), is to repeat yourself over... and over... and over... and over in a very level tone as the other person shouts over you. Like, the same three words "It's not my responsibility... It's not my responsibility... It's not my responsibility" in the same tone. It's annoying as heck, but at some point the other person will stop yelling and you'll say your peice. And, it's much more dignified than screaming.

Best of luck with the difficult situation -- you'll have to deal with this a number of times over the course of your life, but it probably won't be as emotionally draining as it is right now.

Anka
p.s. if you think he'll be pissed, don't tell him about going to med school. It sounds like your'e working for a real a$$.

 

[doc05]

it sounds like the OP is working for a self-centered jackass. I wouldn't say anything.

the nice thing about knowing you'll be in medical school in a year's time is that you can pretty much ignore all his tantrums and the like. after all, you're not looking for a promotion or a LOR? just some cash before med school starts.