**The Official Personal Statement Guide and PS Readers List **

[Richard8794]

I have a few questions regarding PS
I would greatly appreciate it if you guys can help me out

Well I've been working on my PS for a while and finally finished rough draft...
Then I decided to look at some of the actual samples (People who actually applied before) and found out in some way, they always mentioned their research experience and described it in detail.

I was wondering Do I really have to mention research experience in my PS...
is it okay not to include research experience as long as I can put it on AMCAS as Extracurricular activities and mention them in my secondaries?

I do have 2 years experience of researches in organic chemistry lab, but my PS is concentrated more on my personal journey in pursuing medicine. Like some of my clinical experiences and life changing events that eventually led me to decide to pursue medicine...so there is no mention of research at all.....there are so many things that happened in my life and kind of bummed out to fit all these things in 1000 words essay....:[

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[gujuDoc]

I have a few questions regarding PS
I would greatly appreciate it if you guys can help me out

Well I've been working on my PS for a while and finally finished rough draft...
Then I decided to look at some of the actual samples (People who actually applied before) and found out in some way, they always mentioned their research experience and described it in detail.

I was wondering Do I really have to mention research experience in my PS...
is it okay not to include research experience as long as I can put it on AMCAS as Extracurricular activities and mention them in my secondaries?

I do have 2 years experience of researches in organic chemistry lab, but my PS is concentrated more on my personal journey in pursuing medicine. Like some of my clinical experiences and life changing events that eventually led me to decide to pursue medicine...so there is no mention of research at all.....there are so many things that happened in my life and kind of bummed out to fit all these things in 1000 words essay....:[

Yes it is ABSOLUTELY OK!!!

 

[45408]

In fairness, hasn't it ALL pretty much been done before when talking about such things like what you posted above? I bet that many people DID have an epiphany about medicine (how do you explain career changers otherwise) and surely you're not saying they shouldn't talk about that.

If it's TRUE, then it can probably be appropriately put into your PS. I just doubt that most of the people who used the sick/dying relative story really meant it. I mean, come on, if you had already taken the MCAT and started to fill out the AMCAS when your grandma died, then I highly doubt that her death had an influence on your decision to enter medicine!

 

[45408]

I am currently writing my PS and I need a little advice. I am a SDA (Seventh Day Adventsit) who is applying to Loma Linda (a SDA affiliated school that accepts alot of SDA's) and I am also applying to my state school (UAB) and a variety of other school at which I feel that I am a competitive applicant. My question is, will adding something about being a christian and how that adds to my desire to become a doctor hurt me at the non religious schools to which I am applying? Since I live in the "bible belt" I don't feel like this should be a problem, as long as I don't come off as a crazy cultish person, but I was just wondering your imput.

I'm not positive about this, but I would imagine Loma Linda's secondary has plenty of room for you to include more of a religious tilt to your essays. Keep the PS relatively spirituality-free. If you did something meaningful at church, by all means, include it. If you were in church choir for ten years, that's certainly something that would look good on the AMCAS (either activities or PS), but like someone else said, saying "Going to med school is part of God's plan for me" is probably over the line.

 

[JMB2213]

Hello, I have just finished a first draft of my PS and need someone to read over it. Is anyone who has reviewed PS's before able to help me out? Thank you in advance

 

[gujuDoc]

Hello, I have just finished a first draft of my PS and need someone to read over it. Is anyone who has reviewed PS's before able to help me out? Thank you in advance

Send it to me and I'll look over it tonight or tomorrow.

 

[readytostart]

Hi, I have a more or less finalized version of my PS. Could someone give me some feedback on it? Any help will be greatly appreciated.

 

[gujuDoc]

Hi, I have a more or less finalized version of my PS. Could someone give me some feedback on it? Any help will be greatly appreciated.

Send me a PM and I'll give you some feedback.

 

[gujuDoc]

BTW you guys,

I think what theProwler was trying to say is not that its a bad thing if you talk about those topics like illness or death of a loved one influencing you, but only if those things really did impact you before you started out on the premed journey.

For instance, someone just posted in the adcom thread which I mistakingly didn't realize was not posted here and so accidentally responded. But that said, this guy posted how he wanted to talk about a recent injury to show as his decision for medicine though he goes on to mention that he was already premed when this injury occurred.

Therefore, it would be stupid in my opinion to put that in there because it sounds like you are just wanting to add fluff. Now in the grandma example, if you are like my friend who had been taking care of his sick grandparents long before his decision to enter medical school that it truly did significantly impact you, then it is ok to write about it.

 

[zippa]

Does anyone have some good websites that have examples of personal statements? I want to incorporate my research esp since I have been doing it for two years but I don't what to be too detailed or too general.

 

[gujuDoc]

Does anyone have some good websites that have examples of personal statements? I want to incorporate my research esp since I have been doing it for two years but I don't what to be too detailed or too general.

I'd recommend going to Barnes and Noble or Borders and looking for the book by Princeton Review on personal statements. That's a good one. I forget its title. I'll look it up later.

 

[Aynsl156]

Hi guys,

I'm on the sixth complete rewrite of my PS (can you tell I'm deathly nervous?), and you know how after awhile you just lose perspective, and then you don't really know if what you've written is actually relevant or not, and for all you know it could be total and complete ****e? Yeah, that's about where I am. Could someone please look over my most current PS and give me some concrit?

Thank you!

 

[gujuDoc]

Hi guys,

I'm on the sixth complete rewrite of my PS (can you tell I'm deathly nervous?), and you know how after awhile you just lose perspective, and then you don't really know if what you've written is actually relevant or not, and for all you know it could be total and complete ****e? Yeah, that's about where I am. Could someone please look over my most current PS and give me some concrit?

Thank you!

Send me a PM and I'll look at it. I reviewed a lot of them last year for SDNers so I have some idea of what makes a good and bad personal statement.

 

[nicki29]

I too am freaking over this. This is my second time around. My Clinical experiences have not changed. I continue to do the same things essentially i.e research, volunteering and clinical. Do I have to change my original PS to incorporate these or what? Help. GujuDoc would you be willing to look over mine. Thanx in advance:

 

[gujuDoc]

I too am freaking over this. This is my second time around. My Clinical experiences have not changed. I continue to do the same things essentially i.e research, volunteering and clinical. Do I have to change my original PS to incorporate these or what? Help. GujuDoc would you be willing to look over mine. Thanx in advance:

If this is your second time applying, I will give you one piece of advice......

Talk to adcom directors of schools you applied to. Or at the very least talk to people like LizzyM or REL on here about ways you could improve your app and whether anything stands out as needing to be done differently.

You should show that you are doing something to improve your application. I'd also advise you to possibly get different letters if you are unsure of any of your professors because some people have been known to unknowingly get a bad LOR.

But you can send me your PS though I won't get to it before late afternoon tomorrow.

 

[jorditafrita]

I was wondering if anyone would be willing to read over my ps. I been through a couple of drafts and many revisions, but I haven't had anyone who is familiar with medical school personal statements read it over yet.
thanks

 

[Richard8794]

hey guju doc thanks for helping us out here

can you read my PS and give me some feedback too?

I wrote a couple PS and, and I no longer know what I am supposed to write about anymore.

thanks~

 

[gujuDoc]

hey guju doc thanks for helping us out here

can you read my PS and give me some feedback too?

I wrote a couple PS and, and I no longer know what I am supposed to write about anymore.

thanks~

Sure you guys can send me your PSes for now. I have some time this week and tonight.

 

[cherrie]

6. After describing an experience, always mention what you learned from it and/or reflect on how this affected your decision to become a physician or how it will affect you as a physician.

I just really want to point this one out again. I read over a couple of my friends' statements last year, and the question I asked myself at the end was, "Do I truly understand why he/she wants to be a doctor now?" It's easy to bring up a significant event and just assume everyone understands the impact it must have had on your life, but putting it into words makes a huge difference. You are selling a case, and you want it to be well-supported. (Of course, if an event doesn't help you sell your case, you may want to reconsider its inclusion.)

 

[gujuDoc]

I just really want to point this one out again. I read over a couple of my friends' statements last year, and the question I asked myself at the end was, "Do I truly understand <i>why</i> he/she wants to be a doctor now?" It's easy to bring up a significant event and just assume everyone understands the impact it must have had on your life, but putting it into words makes a huge difference. You are selling a case, and you want it to be well-supported.

Yes I know what you mean. I've been reviewing PSes for a couple of years now and one of the points I always tell people is

1. To try to create a theme so that it flows
2. To draw parallels to their experiences and their future career which essentially is another way of stating what you and Diosa are stating about what they learned from each experience.
3. To try to turn negatives into positives.

 

[87138]

Ok so I know several of you say not to talk too extensively about a shadowing experience, but to mention it and kind of move on. Well, in my situation, I decided halfway through college that I wanted to go into medicine, but really didn't solidify that idea until I did a semester-long full-time internship as a Medical Assistant at a family practice office. Since graduating college in May, I have returned to work there full-time and am still learning so much, both in terms of medical information and in interpersonal/communication skills. Several experiences when I was younger, many sports-related, piqued my interest in the field of medicine, but the internship (and subsequent job) is probably the biggest contributor towards my desire to become a physician at this point. Is it a bad idea to discuss the internship/job extensively?

 

[gujuDoc]

Ok so I know several of you say not to talk too extensively about a shadowing experience, but to mention it and kind of move on. Well, in my situation, I decided halfway through college that I wanted to go into medicine, but really didn't solidify that idea until I did a semester-long full-time internship as a Medical Assistant at a family practice office. Since graduating college in May, I have returned to work there full-time and am still learning so much, both in terms of medical information and in interpersonal/communication skills. Several experiences when I was younger, many sports-related, piqued my interest in the field of medicine, but the internship (and subsequent job) is probably the biggest contributor towards my desire to become a physician at this point. Is it a bad idea to discuss the internship/job extensively?

no not at all!!! You want to show the imortant clinical experiences that made a difference towards you decision just as long as you dont' shove your entire resume down the throat of the reader in those 5300 characters or so. I think you'll be fine if you are doing what you suggest above because they are the 1-2 key experiences that made you decide on medicine.

 

[trustforward]

ok, i was sincerely trying to avoid jumping on the bandwagon of those seeking PS advice, but i'm just starting to piece mine together, and i'm not sure how to incorporate a few things (or if i should at all).
I started undergrad as a PR major b/c i love working w/ ppl and wanted to go into PR for healthcare, but i wasn't challenged and slacked off, and let me just say my cum GPA suffered tremendously. Looking solely at jr-sr. year, I would've had a 3.8 cum but taking all 4 yrs into account, i ended up with a 3.45. (didn't come to grips with my passion for medicine until jr. year). From that point, i literally packed as many pre-med pre-reqs possible into my schedule to graduate on time (i knew nothing about post-bac programs at the time... i'd like to thank my advisor for his thoughtless direction). i also worked p/t jobs all throughout undergrad b/c $ was tight, and once i packed in the sciences, there wasn't a chance i was going to find time to volunteer/shadow, etc. etc. needless to say, my ECs pretty much start from the time i graduated.
The chair of my undergrad's pre-med committee suggested that i should mention my initial direction in school as a way to incorporate the upward trend in my GPA; and while i agree, i don't want it to seem that i fell short b/c i have nothing (on paper anyway) to show for those last 2 years other than academics.
any of that make sense?
thank you thank you in advance to anyone who's willing to take a moment to sort through my ramble!!

 

[nick_carraway]

My writing style is usually really formal and can become dry if I'm not careful.

For my PS, I'm trying to avoid boring the reader to death and so I'm seeking suggestions on writing styles that could help.

So far I've got shorter phrasing and trying to start off with an anecdotal story (which is much harder than I thought it'd be).

Thanks in advance for any advice y'all can give!

 

[flaahless]

Hey yall... I'm not sure who here offers PS advice but I have a final draft and would greatly appreciate some critique.

Much thanks for the help

 

[Ziggy08]

I've just finished a draft of my personal statement. If anyone could give it a look, I would really appreciate it.

I'm going to be submitting this essay when I've just arrived in Ghana, probably, this summer, so the beginning might be a little weird.

 

[flaahless]

^^^ I'm not an adcom officer or a med student but I'll critique your PS for you.

 

[JSainte]

I'm still doing my BA in Public Communication at DePaul, but am more than willing to critique some PS's for people. I'm also doing a minor in Journalism, so I've taken more than enough writing courses.

PM me if your interested.

Did I mention I'm currently living in England, unemployed and bored out of my mind?

 

[omegaxx]

My personal take on the PS:

A motif in this thread appears to be "be original". However, I doubt most people are going to have really glorious, never-written-about-before experiences that can wow the adcoms out of their boots. I know I didn't and my PS definitely belonged in the "medicine=science+arts" cliche pile. However, there are many different ways of presenting cliches. The story of Hamlet belongs to the long cliche tradition of son avenging the death of a father at the hand of an evil uncle. Shakespeare's Hamlet is still the masterpiece that everyone knows and quotes.
All I'm saying is: If you got something totally original and amazing, that is awesome. If you don't, don't sweat it, but rather work on the presentation of your material. Imagine what the person reading the PS will see. Think about every single word and the shades of effect it delivers. Work on the details! Nice prose will always be recognized as nice prose. A totally unoriginal but beautifully articulated PS may not land you in the "rockstar" pile, but it will score you at least some points.

 

[omegaxx]

Sorry, double post.

 

[willow18]

I had someone help me out two years ago with my PS, so I'll be more than willing to help/critique anyone who needs it. I'll just say the same thing he said to me then: stand warned, I'll be very honest with you.

(He ended up telling me to can the entire thing, and rewrite it. I did, and it worked out very well for me.)

I'll just add a one important tip: There's a 5300 character limit, but please don't write to the max. Unless you have the most amazing story to tell, try to keep it 4000 characters. The old saying about the 45 seconds they take to look through the entire app is very true, and I've seen it in action.

 

[musiclink213]

I had someone help me out two years ago with my PS, so I'll be more than willing to help/critique anyone who needs it. I'll just say the same thing he said to me then: stand warned, I'll be very honest with you.

(He ended up telling me to can the entire thing, and rewrite it. I did, and it worked out very well for me.)

I'll just add a one important tip: There's a 5300 character limit, but please don't write to the max. Unless you have the most amazing story to tell, try to keep it 4000 characters. The old saying about the 45 seconds they take to look through the entire app is very true, and I've seen it in action.

I read somebody's PS last year and basically, it was horrible. I coulnd't even get through it, there were so many words that required too much thought to figure out what they meant, too much detail on research adn every other thing. Unfortunatly, they weren't as receptive to the "can it and start over" advice. Oh well. Usually, if a person says to start over, there's a good reason for it.

I think a piece of advice that could be added is "Show me, don't tell me." Don't just tell me you volunteered at the hospital, show me what the hospital was like, what it smelled like, etc. However, be sure not to go to hte other extreme and give me os much detail I want to shoot myself. Find a happy medium.

 

[cerulean]

I'm really interested in public health and am hoping to earn a MPH after my MD at some point. Would it be bad to write about public health extensively in my personall statement or should i stay away from that since it's more in the future and solely focus on why I want to pursue the MD? Public health is one of the things that drew me in and persuaded me to pursue medicine.

 

[lina123321]

hey all..i have free time and such, so if you need someone to look over your personal statement and give some pointers, PM me...

 

[googlinggoogler]

I'd be willing to critique personal statements. PM me if you'd like.

 

[TheRealDrDorian]

I'm really interested in public health and am hoping to earn a MPH after my MD at some point. Would it be bad to write about public health extensively in my personall statement or should i stay away from that since it's more in the future and solely focus on why I want to pursue the MD? Public health is one of the things that drew me in and persuaded me to pursue medicine.

These are just my thoughts.

I would mention the MD / MPH you want to pursue, but put extensive details for why you want to do this and integrate the two. I think if you concentrate on the MPH aspect, it might be a turnoff to adcoms.

Basically, write "why MD?" with a sprinkle of MPH for your AMCAS, and "why MPH?" with a sprinkle of MD for your SOPHAS.

 

[nick_carraway]

Hey all,

I've just completed the first draft of my PS that I wouldn't mind sharing with the world and I'd like some opinions on how to make it better.

Thanks for your help, SDNers!

 

[studyin]

You think it's a bad idea to quote a prof at Harvard Med in my personal statement? I'd love to go to Harvard but obviously I'm not banking on it, and I don't want to do anything that'll hurt my chances at other schools. Would it hurt my chances at Harvard? FYI - I don't go to Harvard now.

 

[BlackSails]

Hey all,

I've just completed the first draft of my PS that I wouldn't mind sharing with the world and I'd like some opinions on how to make it better.

The PS itself and extra info can be found @ ercking.googlepages.com/personalstatement

Thanks for your help, SDNers!

-Eric King

Dont have time for most of it right now but:

The opening paragraph says nothing. Also, it is not backed up by the rest of the essay. You say you have tested your desire to be a doctor, but never really prove that. You just give an exposition of some research, TA work and tutoring you have done. Explain how this makes you want to be a doctor.

Every paragraph starts with "as a." Each paragraph also follows the same basic format: As a _______, I did _________ and ________. I learned ________. Mix it up some.

The peroxidase research: Was it published? In what journal? Is your name on it?

Are you really saying that TAing a lab section makes you able to effectively prioritize what needs your attention first?

One thing that is missing from the essay is an explanation of why you want to be a doctor. Yes, you have lots of clinical experience, but you dont mention enjoying any of it. Did you like doing research? Then say so. It may seem obvious that you enjoyed it, but many people do it just to get into med school.

 

[nick_carraway]

Every paragraph starts with "as a." Each paragraph also follows the same basic format: As a _______, I did _________ and ________. I learned ________. Mix it up some.

One thing that is missing from the essay is an explanation of why you want to be a doctor. Yes, you have lots of clinical experience, but you dont mention enjoying any of it. Did you like doing research? Then say so. It may seem obvious that you enjoyed it, but many people do it just to get into med school.

Thanks for your input! I just read through my PS again and you're definitely right about the parallel format of the paragraphs. When I was writing it, that was kind of what I was going for but I read a great PS last night that had refreshing surprises in it and I definitely think my PS is too predictable right now.

I also agree that I need to explicitly say that I liked my experiences. I was afraid of saying that I'm going to do clinical work at Stanford even though I didn't sound too excited about doing clinical work at UC Davis to begin with. Adding in some enthusiasm will solve that, I think.

Do you think that I should take out the section on bench research? It seems too different from the clinical + teaching parts of the PS and I could talk more about why I want to be a doctor if I did take it out. I spent 2.5 years at the research lab though so I think I should mention it.

 

[eatingcom]

Question!!
I spent 1 year after high school, for a mission trip-like services for my religion, traveled across the US and did activities like rasing funds, witnessing and community services. This was the most valuable 1 year throughout my life where I really realized that I wanted a career where I can help people...and to be pre-med.
My religion is considered to be very minority, and I think a lot of people have a negative perspective for it. Should I include the mission trip and opely name my religious faith in my personal statement?

Thank you

 

[willow18]

Guys, avoid making your PS a compendium, a list of all the things you've volunteered for or researched. There's a place for that in the app. It's repetitive and (unless you were in Rwanda during the genocide) extremely boring to read. The PS is about yourself, what drives you, motivates you, what makes you cry, run, and operate. The PS should have a central theme, something about yourself that you want to drive home to the reader. It may sound obvious, but I would say about 25-40% (if not more) of PS's are written like this. If you care to stand out, don't do it.

If your PS looks something like:

- When I volunteered at X hospital.....I came to love clinical medicine.
- I did research at X......and discovered my love for bio medicine.
- Then last summer I went overseas to....and made little John feel better.

Then rewrite it.

 

[studyin]

I shadowed in a 3rd world country and the doctor taught me how to give an injection - which I was hesitant about at first but he said there were no laws about that kind of stuff there and it was legal and okay. Still, would it be a bad idea to talk about that in a PS?

 

[jebus]

omg, i'm so totally looking for someone to sexily read my sexy personal statement.
note: this is only for the sexy people.

 

[Patel1268]

I've read a lot on how to write a personal statement so that before I begin mine, I know how to come up with ideas of what to write about. Many people/websites have said that it's good to come up with something interesting as a theme or a storyline and then go from there to list things that have made you want to become a doctor and/or attributes that would make a good doctor. I had something happen to me when I was 10 that took me to the hospital. I don't want to write about it necessarily, but if I did, would it be a good idea to descriptively write it like "this happened and then this happened to me," or would it be better to actually do a story with quotations and bringing the person reading the personal statement to the scene? Thanks for the advice and answers in advance.

 

[kateycat]

i was just wondering...

i might be reapplying and i don't know if i am supposed to completely redo my ps, or just update/tweak it a little bit? (i asked my premed advisor= as with most things, he's clueless) i don't think it's the problem with my app this year (i got most of my secondaries back) but maybe some of you could read it and let me know what you think?

thanks

 

[Queenshawtii]

^i'm in that same boat too.. I'll most likely be re-applying and i wonder if i need to tweak or totally reVamp my PS

 

[gujuDoc]

omg, i'm so totally looking for someone to sexily read my sexy personal statement.
note: this is only for the sexy people.

 

[musiclink213]

i was just wondering...

i might be reapplying and i don't know if i am supposed to completely redo my ps, or just update/tweak it a little bit? (i asked my premed advisor= as with most things, he's clueless) i don't think it's the problem with my app this year (i got most of my secondaries back) but maybe some of you could read it and let me know what you think?

thanks

When I reapplied, I pretty much did a completely different PS. The ADCOMS are going to want to see that you did something during the time between applications. Even if you didn't do much different, still rewrite it so it doesn't look like last years. A lot of schools told me they keep past apps and if you say you're a reapp, they may go into your old file and see what's changed.

For me, I didn't really do much different in terms of EC's. However, being a reapp changed my perspective on this whole process and helped reinforce that this is what I wanted to do. My first PS, obviously, was from a different angle. If anyone writing a reapp PS wants advice from another (former) reapp, you can PM me if you like.

 

[cushie]

Hey everyone. I've just made some revisions to my PS after taking it to my school's writing center yesterday (they said it's not as bad as I was afraid... )


After making these revisions, I am confident that my statement is much stronger than it was initially. However, I am now about 1000 characters under the limit (I'm at 4430, to be exact). Any opinions on a solid, but slightly length-challenged PS?