The queer question

[Psycho Doctor]

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If gays want to be accepted in this society, then stop singling yourselves out as "gay" and how hard your life is. Everyone deals with difficulties in life but we don't build every experience upon those preferences - but most people don't walk around saying things like, "is it because I'm ________?. Do whatever you want to do behind the scenes - quite frankly I don't really care what that is. Just don't walk into an interview or write on a secondary application that you are gay. There is no need for that and it quite frankly is irrelevant to the practice of medicine. You are the only ones bringing this issue to the forefront on this message board - if you don't want your sexual orientation to be such a big deal, then stop talking about it all the time.

👍 👍 👍 👍 👍

that's the biggest issue, they talk about it all the time (not all of course, but usually the ones with major issues with it)

 

[Psycho Doctor]

Sounds like you might be willing & able to make your predictions come true. Ridiculed anyone lately?

absolutely not; in fact i've "counseled" several gay people who have told me i've helped them and been more understanding than most people including other gay people.

 

[SRQGirl]

If gays want to be accepted in this society, then stop singling yourselves out as "gay" and how hard your life is. Everyone deals with difficulties in life but we don't build every experience upon those preferences - but most people don't walk around saying things like, "is it because I'm ________?. Do whatever you want to do behind the scenes - quite frankly I don't really care what that is. Just don't walk into an interview or write on a secondary application that you are gay. There is no need for that and it quite frankly is irrelevant to the practice of medicine. You are the only ones bringing this issue to the forefront on this message board - if you don't want your sexual orientation to be such a big deal, then stop talking about it all the time.

And here we have a wonderful example of the priviledges that come from being in the majority. It is very easy to say sexual orientation shouldn't be an issue when you, as a heterosexual, have never had to think about the implications of sexual orientation within our society or the diffuculties gay people constantly face. It's like a white person saying something like, "I don't see color; race isn't a factor for me." Yeah, that's easy to say when you're white and race hasn't been something you've had to be aware of your whole life. This is just a variation.

By the way, I'm a straight white woman, so I'm not claiming to have any personal insight on these issues. However, I do know that my life has been significantly easier because of the color of my skin and the fact that I happen to like men.

To the OP, I would be true to yourself. As many other people have said, you don't want to be in a place that would reject you because you're gay, but there's probably no real reason it would come up either. Good luck!

 

[SRQGirl]

absolutely not; in fact i've "counseled" several gay people who have told me i've helped them and been more understanding than most people including other gay people.

Why is couseled in quotation marks?

 

[NYCDesi]

absolutely not; in fact i've "counseled" several gay people who have told me i've helped them and been more understanding than most people including other gay people.

why is counseled in qoutes?

 

[Psycho Doctor]

Why is couseled in quotation marks?

b/c i was doing it without a degree or any formal training...just trying to help them out in whatever way i could.

oh and for those who think i am bigoted or insensitive; i spent several years volunteering in an AIDS hospice offering whatever i coulod to dying gay men

 

[tllajd]

I totally agree with you psycho. Personally, I would not want to have 2 mothers or 2 fathers. Kids face enough ridicule from their peers as it is. This would just be another log on the fire.

Give me a break. 👎 No one should have children then.

 

[tllajd]

b/c i was doing it without a degree or any formal training...just trying to help them out in whatever way i could.

oh and for those who think i am bigoted or insensitive; i spent several years volunteering in an AIDS hospice offering whatever i coulod to dying gay men

Three cheers for Pscyco. Making the world a better place, you are with your love and kindness. 🙄

No, I am not delusional and never said that I was. Will they have problems, yes. Will other children have problems, yes. You are the delusional one if you think all children aren't exposed to ridicule. Anyway, my children are not the issue. It's whether I am discriminated against getting into med school. This is EXACTLY the reason that I probably won't tell admin people.

I'm not even going to get into about my children. You know nothing about them or how they are. Go save another gay.

 

[tllajd]

Do you seriously think your children will never hear ridicule regarding their "parents". You're delusional if you believe that.

And one last thing...What was your problem Psycho? Did you have gay parents? You must have had something wrong with you because I read at one point you were suicidal??? You must have had gay parents. 😕 Hmmm....

 

[VPDcurt]

And one last thing...What was your problem Psycho? Did you have gay parents? You must have had something wrong with you because I read at one point you were suicidal??? You must have had gay parents. 😕 Hmmm....

And one last thing...so you are finally admitting that gay parents can be a problem in that you say he must have had something wrong with him and then ask if his parents were gay. Alas! Bitin' your own tongue my friend.

 

[SRQGirl]

And one last thing...so you are finally admitting that gay parents can be a problem in that you say he must have had something wrong with him and then ask if his parents were gay. Alas! Bitin' your own tongue my friend.

WOW!! Sacasm is really lost on you, isn't it?

 

[tllajd]

And one last thing...so you are finally admitting that gay parents can be a problem in that you say he must have had something wrong with him and then ask if his parents were gay. Alas! Bitin' your own tongue my friend.

I can't even understand your statement.

 

[VPDcurt]

WOW!! Sacasm is really lost on you, isn't it?

nope - i was actually voted "most sarcastic" of my senior class.

 

[velo]

And one last thing...What was your problem Psycho? Did you have gay parents? You must have had something wrong with you because I read at one point you were suicidal??? You must have had gay parents. 😕 Hmmm....

no this is just the standard homophobia that Psycho spouts all over the forums...pretty soon he'll be talking about "declining moral standards" and "slippery slopes" and the like....


did you know that homosexuality is the moral equivilent of beastiality? Strange but true! That's why people will want to marry dogs if we allow gay marriage 🙄

 

[Psycho Doctor]

Three cheers for Pscyco. Making the world a better place, you are with your love and kindness. 🙄

No, I am not delusional and never said that I was. Will they have problems, yes. Will other children have problems, yes. You are the delusional one if you think all children aren't exposed to ridicule. Anyway, my children are not the issue. It's whether I am discriminated against getting into med school. This is EXACTLY the reason that I probably won't tell admin people.

I'm not even going to get into about my children. You know nothing about them or how they are. Go save another gay.

of course, i know all kids, teens and adults get ridiculed. I am not delusional about that. I was merely responding to what you said.

and oh i thought you were being nice, by the time i finished reading your post, i saw the sarcasm in it.

 

[Psycho Doctor]

And one last thing...What was your problem Psycho? Did you have gay parents? You must have had something wrong with you because I read at one point you were suicidal??? You must have had gay parents. 😕 Hmmm....

um no, if you must know the cause of my depression: my gf (fiance) died suddenly

 

[Psycho Doctor]

nope - i was actually voted "most sarcastic" of my senior class.

 

[Psycho Doctor]

no this is just the standard homophobia that Psycho spouts all over the forums...pretty soon he'll be talking about "declining moral standards" and "slippery slopes" and the like....


did you know that homosexuality is the moral equivilent of beastiality? Strange but true! That's why people will want to marry dogs if we allow gay marriage 🙄

uh i'm a guy.

you just don't understand so there's no point in trying to explain

 

[velo]

uh i'm a guy.

you just don't understand so there's no point in trying to explain

I edited for gender, I thought I had remembered you dropping a female pronoun in another thread.

and no, based on the posts I've seen from you I think i understand pretty well, or would you care to enlighten me?

 

[VPDcurt]

I edited for gender, I thought I had remembered you dropping a female pronoun in another thread.

and no, based on the posts I've seen from you I think i understand pretty well, or would you care to enlighten me?

why have you turned this thread into a personal matter?

 

[uclabruin2003]

And here we have a wonderful example of the priviledges that come from being in the majority. It is very easy to say sexual orientation shouldn't be an issue when you, as a heterosexual, have never had to think about the implications of sexual orientation within our society or the diffuculties gay people constantly face. It's like a white person saying something like, "I don't see color; race isn't a factor for me." Yeah, that's easy to say when you're white and race hasn't been something you've had to be aware of your whole life. This is just a variation.

By the way, I'm a straight white woman, so I'm not claiming to have any personal insight on these issues. However, I do know that my life has been significantly easier because of the color of my skin and the fact that I happen to like men.

To the OP, I would be true to yourself. As many other people have said, you don't want to be in a place that would reject you because you're gay, but there's probably no real reason it would come up either. Good luck!

This is so true. I'm not sure why no one is noticing this post. In any case, its easy for someone straight to be like "you gays should stop bringing up your gayness." well if you arent gay you dont know what its like. references to your sexuallity occur throughout your day. Coworkers may ask "So hows your Bf/gf?" or they may suggest "Hey I have a great girl that you can meet (Even though youre gay." ) I dont think many gay people right out state in their interview "Hi My name is X and I'm gay." Thats ridiculous. However, the topic of being gay may come up in questions about family, goals, where you want to be, what you want to do, etc. In any case, heterosexism (the act of assuming that everyone you meet is straight) is rampant. Most straight people don't understand what it means for a LGBT person to hide or lie. I can only hope that everyone tries to understand....

 

[velo]

why have you turned this thread into a personal matter?

not personal, just trying to engage psycho on the matter because of some discussions in other threads that he stopped posting on. Then again this is pre-allo, so its not really the place. I'll pick this up elsewhere, gotta go anyway

 

[VPDcurt]

This is so true. I'm not sure why no one is noticing this post. In any case, its easy for someone straight to be like "you gays should stop bringing up your gayness." well if you arent gay you dont know what its like. references to your sexuallity occur throughout your day. Coworkers may ask "So hows your Bf/gf?" or they may suggest "Hey I have a great girl that you can meet (Even though youre gay." ) I dont think many gay people right out state in their interview "Hi My name is X and I'm gay." Thats ridiculous. However, the topic of being gay may come up in questions about family, goals, where you want to be, what you want to do, etc. In any case, heterosexism (the act of assuming that everyone you meet is straight) is rampant. Most straight people don't understand what it means for a LGBT person to hide or lie. I can only hope that everyone tries to understand....

no one is noticing the post you are referring to because, much like your post, it is simply stating the obvious. of course someone has the right to bring it up if it is relevant to the given situation. do i disagree with the behaviors associated with homosexuality? yes, but i do not frown upon anyone for their choices in life. i just think that they way some of them carry themselves is ridiculous and i know that all of you can agree - even though you are just trying to come across as the most open-minded individuals ever and i guess i'm fine with that...it just doesn't mean much.

 

[Psycho Doctor]

not personal, just trying to engage psycho on the matter because of some discussions in other threads that he stopped posting on. Then again this is pre-allo, so its not really the place. I'll pick this up elsewhere, gotta go anyway

i only stopped posting on them b/c it was the same stuff being posted over and over again. No one was changing their opinions or being enlightened by anyone else. if there is something you particularly want a response on, make it obvious...once the threads become too long and it's too difficult to see the new posts, i stop looking for them.

 

[tllajd]

um no, if you must know the cause of my depression: my gf (fiance) died suddenly

Actually I don't really care about your depression, although I wouldn't wish a loss on anyone. I was making a point.

It just shows you that everyone has stuff to deal with, whether it's death or lesbian "parents".

I'm going to play nice with you children and leave this alone.

 

[fielight]

med schools tend to be conservative, and i believe they definitely lean toward a specific type of personality (you see a lot of these quasi-surgeon, 6'+, WASP, fraternity, all-american types of men in med school, and i don't think it's a coincidence). though at the same time, i don't think they could exclude people based solely on sexuality. there are gay med students, but the percentage is really low (at my school, there are maybe only 2-3 per class of 170+, if that). if i were you, i wouldn't bring it up during the interview; it's not about lying or "being in the closet," rather that your sexuality is your business, and you don't have to go around announcing it (it's analogous to a heterosexual person introducing himself as "hi, my name is xxxx, and i'm straight" everytime he meets someone new -- it's ridiculous, why the addendum?). if you have a strong application, then you have nothing to worry about. after all, a strong applicant is a strong applicant regardless of race, sexuality, sex, etc.

 

[wendywellesley]

Hey yall, I know this is a strange first thing to ask about, but I am wondering if the fact that I am gay will affect my chances? I don't come off as very gay but I think it probably occurs to most people that I might be. No one has asked me about it yet (I've had 5 interviews, and I have a 6th coming up), but I'm just worried about it as far as conservative places like Texas A&M and University of Nevada. Neither of those schools asked but do you think it would hurt my chances? Does anyone else have experience with this? Any input would be appreciated.

in the end, i don't think adcoms give a s*it (or so i would like to believe). you could get a bigot as an interviewer or someone in the committee might be one. but there could just as well be racists or an anti-semites siting on board as well. i think all they really care about is can you handle the work coupled with the question of do you have the stamina and compassion for this field.

*BELIEVE* me i know that being gay is a big deal and it very easy for straight people to write it off. I don't mean to sound insenstive or not understanding but in this context, i don't think it is something that will effect your chances of sucess. I would focus more on which school is the best place for you rather than worring about what they think of you (as a gay man) because i think it is a non-issue.

 

[seethrew]

Aside from being illegal and just plan stoopid, if a medical school for some crazy reason decided you were unfit to attend their school because you were gay - would you WANT to go there? Not that I really think that that is likely, but what do I know. If you are a good student with a good record and honestly wanted to be a doctor I think your chances of getting in somewhere are greater than that.

But I can relate in some way. I have had experiences and a past history that is decidedly not conservative, one that I had feared more conservative schools would (and I think have) frowned on. Poo on them.

Just try not to psyche yourself out. Project the REAL you that is relevant to the questions you are asked and what you want put out there in terms of your application. You've probably been doing that all along. If being gay is important in your decision to become a doctor, I wouldn't cover it up. My worst interviews were ones I attempted to craft TOO MUCH, in fear my honest answers would not be good enough. What a way to behave... it made me feel foolish.

Good luck! I'm sure you are doing just great.

 

[Reimat]

Yea- I think being homophobic would hurt you more than being openly gay

 

[Psycho Doctor]

Neuropower, just ignore Psycho. He's clearly established himself as a firm member of the fundamentalist Christian right. His opinions are resolute and it's just pointless to argue. I love how he put parents in quotes! So priceless.

so what if i'm a fundamentalist Christian? I just have a different perspective from you; it doesn't make it wrong.

And I put parents in quotes b/c i honestly didn't know whose children they are; you have to admit, it does cause confusion.

 

[Medikit]

so what if i'm a fundamentalist Christian? I just have a different perspective from you; it doesn't make it wrong.

Actually one of your perspectives is wrong. I think they are pretty mutually exclusive.

 

[VPDcurt]

It's all about the choices we make. If you are not willing to accept the consequences, then that is your problem.

 

[ajt2003]

It's all about the choices we make. If you are not willing to accept the consequences, then that is your problem.

Waaittt...you're not implying that homosexuality is a choice, are you? Good grief, Charlie Brown.

Can't deal with this thread anymore.

 

[45408]

I dont think many gay people right out state in their interview "Hi My name is X and I'm gay." Thats ridiculous.

I have a whole lot of ridiculous people for you to meet. There's always people around the LGBQRST center wearing shirts that say stuff like "Gay? Okay!!" or wearing a pink shirt with a rainbow and a unicorn and gay organizations listed on the back. That's what I call flagrant and unnecessary.

 

[stoic]

I have a whole lot of ridiculous people for you to meet. There's always people around the LGBQRST center wearing shirts that say stuff like "Gay? Okay!!" or wearing a pink shirt with a rainbow and a unicorn and gay organizations listed on the back. That's what I call flagrant and unnecessary.

you're a biggot. i call THAT flagrant and unnecessary.

what a total douchebag. go get off with your bible.

 

[45408]

you're a biggot. i call THAT flagrant and unnecessary.

what a total douchebag. go get off with your bible.

where did you come up with this sudden elaboration on my entire psyche? What I said was neither bigoted nor flagrant, but you like throwing around words like they mean something. I know - I'll make my own shirt that says "Heterosexual? Damn straight!" and walk around. See how that goes over.

 

[VPDcurt]

you're a biggot. i call THAT flagrant and unnecessary.

what a total douchebag. go get off with your bible.

you just don't get it, do you? when will people like you learn? there is only one word that can describe it - unfortunate.

 

[stoic]

where did you come up with this sudden elaboration on my entire psyche? What I said was neither bigoted nor flagrant, but you like throwing around words like they mean something. I know - I'll make my own shirt that says "Heterosexual? Damn straight!" and walk around. See how that goes over.

go right ahead.

 

[stoic]

you just don't get it, do you? when will people like you learn? there is only one word that can describe it - unfortunate.

oh i got it. you're a scared white male.

I'm sick of seeing intolerance and predjudice on this board.

 

[VPDcurt]

oh i got it. you're a scared white male.

I'm sick of seeing intolerance and predjudice on this board.

if a middle-eastern male is also considered a white male, then yes, i am a white male.


"predjudice" - i would like to point you in the following direction ------> www.dictionary.com

 

[stoic]

really, well i don't think that you should be able to let people know that you're middle eastern b/c that might scare or upset them. you're just gonna need to keep that bit of info to yourself from now on.

 

[VPDcurt]

really, well i don't think that you should be able to let people know that you're middle eastern b/c that might scare or upset them. you're just gonna need to keep that bit of info to yourself from now on.

hmmm...funny how you claim to be open-minded and whatnot. i was just showing how incorrect you were. i don't wear a shirt saying "i'm middle eastern" or go to bars and try to recruit people to participate in my culture 😉

 

[hnbui]

it's very simple. In order to be a good physician you need to be tolerant of others. Better to be openly gay and tolerant than a bigot and homophobic.

fyi.... from a psychological stand point homophobes are really just homosexuals who suppress their sexual feelings and urges and project it toward others.

 

[stoic]

hmmm...funny how you claim to be open-minded and whatnot. i was just showing how incorrect you were. i don't wear a shirt saying "i'm middle eastern" or go to bars and try to recruit people to participate in my culture 😉

you think gay people go around trying to recruit? are you serious?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

you don't know many queer fold do ya?

 

[VPDcurt]

you don't know many queer fold do ya?

I know very many gays but i am yet to meet a queer fold.

 

[stoic]

I know very many gays but i am yet to meet a queer fold.

yes, as we all know pointing out someone else's grammer error makes your opinions more valid.

and ps... that sentence structure seems somewhat middle eastern to me. could you please use a more traditional american writing style?

 

[Medikit]

Waaittt...you're not implying that homosexuality is a choice, are you? Good grief, Charlie Brown.

Can't deal with this thread anymore.

Being sexually attracted to males isn't a choice, having sex with them, however, is.

 

[wendywellesley]

if a middle-eastern male is also considered a white male, then yes, i am a white male.[/url]

this thread is getting silly.

what country are you from VPDcurt?

 

[VPDcurt]

this thread is getting silly.

what country are you from VPDcurt?

I am lebanese

 

[tinkerbelle]

and ps... that sentence structure seems somewhat middle eastern to me. could you please use a more traditional american writing style?

what an uncool thing to say 👎