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- Jul 10, 2003
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docB said:It would be like me taking a dump in your car that you have to clean up and wanting you to think it was way cool.
I have to use that at a cocktail party sometime. LMAO
docB said:It would be like me taking a dump in your car that you have to clean up and wanting you to think it was way cool.
SaltySqueegee said:My first clash with reality was when I met my first Smurf (according to the Attending) in the ER. It was then that I knew EM was the right place for me.
Sick, but the truth.
Katee80 said:Newbie here....what's a Smurf?
notstudying said:Awesome thread!
So, your friendly medical student will have to call a MAINTENANCE consult. I wonder how they bill for that...
On one occasion where a patient managed to nailgun his palm with a massive wood nail, I used his co-worker's snips and pliers to remove it. Saved a call to maintenance.notstudying said:And (this one comes with a lack of sarcasm...), if you get a fish hook stuck in your hand, you are probably better off cutting it and pulling it through yourself, rather than bringing it to the ED where, by some chance of fate, there WILL BE NO WIRE CUTTERS!!! (At least none with anything resembling an ability to cut). So, your friendly medical student will have to call a MAINTENANCE consult. I wonder how they bill for that...
its not. good luck with that.EMRaiden said:One of my EM rotation evals stated that I was "too cynical for my 'medical age'"... I don't know if it was a compliment or not
If you're going to steal a Rx pad and forge a prescription, don't bother with (badly) forging a prescription for Tylenol #3. You'll still get caught, and even if you don't you haven't really gained much.stephew said:1)If you steal someone's prescription pad, be aware that "Mofine" isn't usually prescribed by the unit "pound" (as in "A pound of Mofine")
j-snake said:This is the 365th post for this thread. I think we've got ourselves a calendar.
Thanks to Katee80 giving us the 366th post, we've now got leap years covered too.Katee80 said:That was too "quick"......witty..... whatever...made me choke on my coffee I laughed so hard.
too bad no pics!
Geez, and I thought people at my hospital did stupid ****.docB said:AND TALK SOMEONE INTO TRANSFERRING YOU TO MY CELL PHONE (I'm gonna find the one that did THAT)
Earth said:also, if you're going to attempt suicide, be a man about it. Don't slit your forearms til your veins are sticking to gauze like dark chicken meat and then say it was someone else who had something else against you.
dchristismi said:Another way not to attempt suicide:
Please don't attempt to hang yourself from a doorknob. It really won't work, no matter how hard you lean against it. Yes, points for creativity, but the nurses will laugh at you behind your back. Don't feel too bad, though. They laugh at everybody.
Febrifuge said:'cuz while it's (thank god) a very small and specialized fetish subculture, I imagine there's good money to be made as a "pink sock" adult website model.
LMFAO!!!CSI Miami said:If you are trying to read a gas meter, in a hole in the ground & you just can't quite see it - try using your lighter to illuminate things.
EMRaiden said:I had a patient come in the other day complaining that he had had Hepatitis B so long it had turned into Hepatitis C...
From last night:mojo said:1) Never run from the police especially if its a K9 unit.
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kaydgirl said:I love this thread. It made my week. I will be a MS-1 at VCOM in 1 month. I have volunteered in the ER for 3 summers now, which means there are lots of stories just like these, mine aren't as technical as some because really my only job is getting blankets/pillows/soda.
drlisa0318 said:I'm planning on family medicine, but these posts are so great that I'm going to have to take a serious look at EM.
Please keep these posts coming! They make my day!
stoic said:If you're a diabetic with severely decreased circulation, don't try to "dig out" your own ingrown toenails. Gangrene isn't fun for ANYBODY.
Sessamoid said:If you happen to be driving drunk and feeling that you can't stay awake anymore, you shouldn't turn off your lights when you park in the middle of the interstate to take your nap.