- Joined
- Feb 22, 2007
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not an ER story.. but i have a good one from non-trauma surg..
when you get tired of vaginal or anal sex.. try transverse colon.. there are individuals out there who will pay 1000 bucks a pop to screw a colostomy patient (yes.. the colostomy).. more amazingly is there are prostitutes who sell their colostomy..
Your patient base must be more "cerebral" than that of FoughtFyr. I'm still cracking up about that bit he posted (paraphrasing) "The prison must be required to have at least one guy who jams pencils into his urethra."
One of the chemicals at the plant was chlorine gas. Apparently, if you breathe it a bit, you can get a bit high off it. Keep in mind that this same gas was used as a chemical agent in WWI. No, I don't get it either.
Chlorine burns like hell in such minute amounts, I can't imagine someone getting a good enough whiff to get any kind of highness out of it unless they're also getting pulmonary edema.
Speaking of which, I heard a story about a guy who all his chlorine tabs for the pool were stuck together after a long winter in the garage. So he puts them in the microwave to "soften them up." Yeah, chlorine gas ain't good for you.
Speaking of which, I heard a story about a guy who all his chlorine tabs for the pool were stuck together after a long winter in the garage. So he puts them in the microwave to "soften them up." Yeah, chlorine gas ain't good for you.
Speaking of which, I heard a story about a guy who all his chlorine tabs for the pool were stuck together after a long winter in the garage. So he puts them in the microwave to "soften them up." Yeah, chlorine gas ain't good for you.
Never work for Kaiser Permanente, DocB: You're blessed with too much common sense. IMHO, engaging in such rationality will only gum up the sprockets at a Kaiser facility.
Not a personal experience, thank god, but today I learned never ever ever to allow two 1"x1"x1" (or bigger) magnets into even the same ROOM.
This is Dirks Accident:
http://magnetnerd.com/Neodymium Magnets/Dirks Accident.htm?1
With X-Rays! And photographs! First on the page is the X-Ray so don't scroll down if you're squeemish.
If your kid is running a fever for a week, it's obviously cheaper to call EMS in when he spikes a 104.4 fever than to just bring him into his PCP. Bonus points when it's all our fault.
During residency I had a floor nurse who was obsessing about a kid's fever being 'too high'. I kept saying it didn't matter so she finally calls me and asks snottily 'Well what temperature would you care about, Dr. Stitch? At least leave me parameters.'
I wrote the following order: please notify house officer should child spontaneously combust secondary to fever.
It did not go over well. But she wanted parameters!
I wrote the following order: please notify house officer should child spontaneously combust secondary to fever.
Linky no worky.
Looks like they got boingboinged! I'll look and see if they have a mirror site or something... otherewise it'll recover in a couple of days when the blogwatchers go away
What are you talking about? A psychotic break is about as serious as mental problems get, and would explain her violence and symptoms. And yes, people who throw their baby off balconies while naked during a psychotic break tend to spend some time talking with psych.
There are days when I really think I should just quit this and open up a bar...
There are days when I really think I should just quit this and open up a bar...
What *I* want to know is what led to her psychotic break. Was she self-medicating for serious mental illness?
And I hope she spent some time talking with psych, rather than just being thrown in jail. Some people really have genuine issues and should be in a hospital for them. Some people are liars, who are just trying to get out of trouble (the name Susan Smith comes to mind).
I still feel sorrier for the baby than her.
It wasn't post-partum. Speaking with the aunt, the mother was very concerned about taking care of her child and had even taken that day off work that day to be with her son, who'd had an episode of vomiting the night before. There was a previous psych history, but it had been stable for many years. It was just .
Had a woman transferred to our hospital due to HELLP. Previously healthy, G1, had prenatal care without incident until that day. While over in labor and delivery, she suddenly became aphasic and flaccid on the one side. Rushed to CT to find IVH. BPs never went over 160 measured. Stat section.
I was in the ICU, saw her that morning with absent corneals. Ordered definitive study. Later, I had to tell her mother she was brain dead and that no intervention was useful.
Then go home to hug my pregnant wife.
You know, it would have been much better for everyone if she got help way before this happened. I don't blame her if she was that sick but I blame the people around her that should have done something and/ or admitted her to a psych ward. As for now, trust me its easier for her to stay psychotic and in prison rather than have to live with what she has done to her baby.
SIDS deaths are impossible too. Had a 6 month old come in, who was obviously dead. We worked on him for a while but we knew he had been dead for a while...finally called it and went and got the mother. I stayed in the room with her, the pain and grief she was experiencing must have been unimaginable. I could literally feel it. My wife was 8 months pregnant at the time and I had a rough time with the rest of that shift. I decided not to tell her and I never have. Probably never will either.
I had a 17 week fetal demise when my wife was ~20 weeks. It really got to me but of course I couldn't talk to my wife about it. You just carry that stuff around until it wears off.
I wonder sometimes why we are surprised to have child molesters among us, or criminals, when on many occasions we become part of the system that creates them!!
But she wanted parameters!
If your very elderly mother is forced to live in a nursing home so she can have round the clock care to manage her brittle diabetes it's probably not a great idea to take her out of said nursing home and bring her to Vegas for the holidays without any of her medications. If that's beyond you you might at least want to know what medications she's supposed to be on or even what types of medical problems she has.
You see, if you fail in those measures, your mother will wind up in the ER in florid DKA with a glucose of >1200, pH of 7.13, renal failure, hyperkalemia, sepsis, altered mental status, etc. If I seem frustrated when you answer all of my questions with "I don't know.," even easy questions like "Can she usually talk?" you will understand. If you're lucky I might not even explode all over you and tell you outright that you've killed her with your stupidity.
If your very elderly mother is forced to live in a nursing home so she can have round the clock care to manage her brittle diabetes it's probably not a great idea to take her out of said nursing home and bring her to Vegas for the holidays without any of her medications. If that's beyond you you might at least want to know what medications she's supposed to be on or even what types of medical problems she has.
You see, if you fail in those measures, your mother will wind up in the ER in florid DKA with a glucose of >1200, pH of 7.13, renal failure, hyperkalemia, sepsis, altered mental status, etc. If I seem frustrated when you answer all of my questions with "I don't know.," even easy questions like "Can she usually talk?" you will understand. If you're lucky I might not even explode all over you and tell you outright that you've killed her with your stupidity.
If you're putting tape - the big, 2 inch cloth tape - onto a dressing over a butt boil that's been I & D'd, do NOT put the tape on the anus. That's not skin, that's mucosa. 1. it will hurt like hell when the patient is going about their life (MUCH worse than the incision site), and 2. when the tape comes off, it will take "DNA laden tissue" (a/k/a "rectal mucosa") with it. On the flip side, the patient will get almost instant relief.
If you're a woman, significant movement just as you're about to get a rectal exam is a bad idea. The physician's finger may end up somewhere that neither he, nor you, want it to.
Yes, I know your baby was perfectly fine when you brought him home, but little babies can get really sick, really fast.
6 days old. Normal pregnancy, normal delivery... now hypothermic, hypoxic, hypotensive and hypoglycemic. And oozing from every needlestick.
Plt 11.
INR of 6.
Ph 6.9
Hgb initally 13. Lab called with a repeat as the chopper crew was wheeling the baby out: down to 4.
I never, ever want to watch fulminant DIC in a baby ever again. There wasn't a damn thing we could do. (And yes, we threw everything and the kitchen sink at this kiddo.)
Baby didn't make it.
Medicine sucks.
If you are a 75 yo with a history of brain tumors, seizures, hemiplegia and DVTs for which you take rat poison don't climb up ladders. Jeeze this is so common and stupid. What is wrong with these people?
During residency I had a floor nurse who was obsessing about a kid's fever being 'too high'. I kept saying it didn't matter so she finally calls me and asks snottily 'Well what temperature would you care about, Dr. Stitch? At least leave me parameters.'
I wrote the following order: please notify house officer should child spontaneously combust secondary to fever.
It did not go over well. But she wanted parameters!