Types of Attendings

[78222]

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There really should be a version of the 12 types of med students for attendings

My additions:

Touchy Feely Attending Guy: Makes an effort to touch every patient - and you - longer than is really necessary. Often asks open ended questions that can't really be answered or asks what sounds like a reasonably straight forward question then corrects you by telling an empathy story. Talks a lot but never seems to tell you anything.
Pros: Don't have to know anything in order to answer his pimp questions.
Cons: Uncomfortably long handshakes, desire to fling oneself out the window during long rounds.

The Aloof Attending: Generally doesn't acknowledge your presence or seem to know/care you exist. Will sometimes ask you to tell him/her about a patient then walks into the room before you get 2 words out of your mouth. Generally not that bad to work with unless you actually want to learn something.
Pros: Attending has low expectations of you and it is generally quite possible to come in late, disappear, goof off rather than do actual work.
Cons: Difficult to learn anything or receive external validation for your efforts.

The Best Friend Attending: Much like the parent who wants to be best friends with her teenage daughter, this attending tends to let a lot slide so long as he/she perceives you to be their friend. This attending is generally awesome to have - so long as you are "friends".
Pros: Free lunches, good evals
Cons: ?

Dr. Irate: Screams at you, the resident, the nurse, or even a file folder for the most innocent of infractions. Spends a considerable amount of time talking about how EM/FP/etc are a bunch of idiots who only consulted us because they are *****s/lazy. Pimp questions are usually quite hard or esoteric, an incorrect answer will likely result in a comment about how you just "killed the patient" or "clearly failed to learn anything the first 2 years".
Pros: Fear of being berated results in more studying/learning more
Con: Complete asshat, generally a miserable curmudgeon.

 

[smq123]

Good list.

The Best Friend Attending: Much like the parent who wants to be best friends with her teenage daughter, this attending tends to let a lot slide so long as he/she perceives you to be their friend. This attending is generally awesome to have - so long as you are "friends".
Pros: Free lunches, good evals
Cons: ?

Cons: You have to laugh at his jokes and his stories, even if they're not really funny. Have to look like you're happy to be around him, even when you would really rather be doing/seeing something else. Have to restrain yourself from rolling your eyes when this attending trots out some slang term that "all the kids are using nowadays." (Small subset of attendings.)

These types of attendings are nice and fun to be around, but things can get sticky when a) you're just not in the mood to be in the hospital/clinic at that moment, b) you have to evaluate him, or c) he has to evaluate you.

 

[45408]

Cons: You have to laugh at his jokes and his stories, even if they're not really funny. Have to look like you're happy to be around him, even when you would really rather be doing/seeing something else. Have to restrain yourself from rolling your eyes when this attending trots out some slang term that "all the kids are using nowadays." (Small subset of attendings.)

Also sounds a lot like the Dorky Attending, whose peers all think he's a fruitcake, but you have to look enthusiastic and at least try to laugh at a joke here and there.

 

[Ypo.]

Dr. Frustrated by his job as a drug dealer but lacks ability to do anything about it.
This type rants and raves to the medical student about how they are not going to give a drug seeker a shot of dilaudid and a script for vicodin and then proceed to do exactly what they just said they weren't going to do.
Pros: ? I guess drug seeker is a happy patient.
Cons: Having to listen to the rant, full well knowing they are FOS. Knowing they are perpetuating the cycle.

 

[Rendar5]

Also sounds a lot like the Dorky Attending, whose peers all think he's a fruitcake, but you have to look enthusiastic and at least try to laugh at a joke here and there.

Y'know, I had an attending like that, and yet, somehow his dumb jokes actually were funny, all the weird things about patients he said turned out to be true, got consults to do things when they were off elsewhere, and despite his manner of talking, his patients loved him and did things no one else could make htem do (pt's refusing draws on multiple multiple visits suddenly allowed blood draws, pts who absolutely wouldn't leave decided that a nursing home stay would be a fantastic idea).

Honestly, I don't know why he played it up as the dorky attending...

 

[BestinHeels08]

I've worked in many hospitals, and you do meet a variety of doctors along with the candy shop of personalities.(n not the candy shop song) When it comes down to it the best Doctor in a patients eyes is one they feel comfortable speaking with dorky or not the guy must have it.

 

[tanqueray84]

".
Pros: Fear of being berated results in more studying/learning more

Being berated definitely does not make me study more. These people tend to make me turn off. I study hard for the people who are nice and encouraging. They make you want to work harder for them.

 

[blabbyblab]

Dr. Prehistoric...

Glory days of practice were before parents were born. Doesn't see the utility in CT scans let alone EMR. Will pass gas in front of patients without flinching.

Pros: sheer entertainment, a first hand look at 50s era practice guidelines, will generally let you do anything you want to a patient (go do that LP!)

Cons: slow rounds

 

[PeepshowJohnny]

Dr. Inferiority Complex Attending

May be a nice guy and good doctor, but is very offended their specialty isn't the most respected or reimbursed. Will launch into a rant of indignation they feel they or their specialty is being even remotely slighted.
Pro: Show an interest in their field and they'll adore you.
Con: Very easy to offend, liable to pick on students going into highly selective fields.

and his brother

Dr. Superiority Complex Attending.
Pretty much the inverse. In a highly competitive field, thinks the world of himself and wants everyone else to as well. Loves to make statements about how difficult his work is and how "not everybody could cut it."
Pro: If you're not interested, easy to avoid work because he'd prefer for you not to be their anyway.
Con: Probably have to kiss up to this guy if you want to go into his specialty.

 

[GoBuckeyes913]

The One-Upper Attending: Has an exagerrated personal over-the-top story for every clinical scenario known to man that is superior (and somewhat Herculean) to any situation you have or will ever have to deal with. Residents and students have to painfully listen to these stories out of respect, and eventually lose the joy of talking openly about doing new procedures or seeing rare cases.
Resident: "I intubated this dude in the ED today"
One-Upper: "I'll never forget the time in 1980 when I was the only resident in the hospital and had to 5 emergency airways in 30 minutes, etc.."
Pros: Excellent Friday night venting sessions at the bar
Cons: Having someone constantly claim to one-up you when you achieve something; Homicidal tendencies

 

[hippocampus]

the b*tch: mean, never smiles, unfriendly. makes you dread going to rotations. makes you hate the field and would never even want to consider going into it. evaluates you negatively when she is not great with the patients herself. in a non competitive field but thinks she's better than everyone. assumes you dont know anything, and teaches you in a condescending manner even though you already knew whatever basic thing she teaches you. difficult to talk to, hard to get along with. will never be your "best friend." fake to the nurses. she would be a more effective teacher if she were to change her personality.
pros: nothing
cons: everything

 

[ZincFingers]

Dr. Schizo: Generally has a Cluster A personality disorder. Often found on psychiatry rotations, where they may gravitate due to their unique perspective on the patients, but may also be found on any primary care service. (Not so much on surgery, where different personality disorders rule the day.) When you ask Dr. Schizo a question, you never know just what kind of response you may get. ("Sir, how can you tell adjustment disorder from major depression?" "Yeah, there are rules to tell them apart but it's like this... I don't think adjusting to the non-monetary system of the future will go well on anyone." ???) Nonlinear thought processes.

Pros: Every day will be a unique and interesting experience. Helps you understand how your patients think on psych.
Cons: Hard to keep this attending on track. Difficulty establishing any kind of relationship. Rounds may be delayed by 9/11 conspiracy theories.

 

[JLM]

Dr. Sexual Harassment Panda - while married with children, he/she continuously reminds you of how terrible their sex life has become at home and that marriage is a mistake. Occasionally moves in to "smell your cologne/perfume." I like to hear that I have nice eyes, but come on now... you are 45. But, I cant blatantly reject you because you hold my future in your f*ing hands with that eval.


Pros: free lunches, good evals, occasional butt grab
Cons: feeling the need to bathe with Hibiclens every day after work.

 

[45408]

Dr. Sexual Harassment Panda - while married with children, he/she continuously reminds you of how terrible their sex life has become at home and that marriage is a mistake. Occasionally moves in to "smell your cologne/perfume." I like to hear that I have nice eyes, but come on now... you are 45. But, I cant blatantly reject you because you hold my future in your f*ing hands with that eval.


Pros: free lunches, good evals, occasional butt grab
Cons: feeling the need to bathe with Hibiclens every day after work.

seriously? wow.

 

[tulane06]

the b*tch: mean, never smiles, unfriendly. makes you dread going to rotations. makes you hate the field and would never even want to consider going into it. evaluates you negatively when she is not great with the patients herself. in a non competitive field but thinks she's better than everyone. assumes you dont know anything, and teaches you in a condescending manner even though you already knew whatever basic thing she teaches you. difficult to talk to, hard to get along with. will never be your "best friend." fake to the nurses. she would be a more effective teacher if she were to change her personality.
pros: nothing
cons: everything

I had this one last rotation. There is one pro though, the people on your next rotation will seem like wonderful angels in comparison.

 

[barasch]

Dr. Faux-fun likes to tell jokes and make crude remarks to get you to let your guard down. As soon as you're nice-and-relaxed, and your next presentation of a patient history isn't delivered with military precision, he jumps all over you.

Pros: He tells jokes and makes crude remarks, can be funny
Cons: You never quite know when he's going to flip his lid

 

[eforest]

the b*tch: mean, never smiles, unfriendly. makes you dread going to rotations. makes you hate the field and would never even want to consider going into it. evaluates you negatively when she is not great with the patients herself. in a non competitive field but thinks she's better than everyone. assumes you dont know anything, and teaches you in a condescending manner even though you already knew whatever basic thing she teaches you. difficult to talk to, hard to get along with. will never be your "best friend." fake to the nurses. she would be a more effective teacher if she were to change her personality.
pros: nothing
cons: everything

I have this one right now. She'll start to explain basic things to me... going on and on and not allowing me to either escape or get a word in edgewise to indicate in some way that I already know what she's telling me (I don't want to come off as obnoxious, or interrupt). After one particularly long winded explanation of basic concepts, she tells me that I have a sizeable "knowledge gape." I think she means knowledge gap which is wierd because she speaks English as a first language.

 

[t33sg1rl]

Dr. Gunner All Growed Up & Twice As Scary

Give citations to everything he has read. "We are treaing this patient with drug x due to the results of the ACRONYM trial at Hopkins published in NEJM on July 2, 2006, which you guys should really read for tomorrow and we'll talk about it, followed by lunch, which will be Salisbury steaks, published in "Cafeteria Menu" 2008, September 1 edition." Knows freaking EVERYTHING. Pimps on IP3/DAG pathway, and after combined memory of 2 med 3's, med 4, and intern are exhausted, lectures on some "really exciting new developments" into the molecular garbage that none of us have heard of. Also tends to bounce up and down on his heels during rounds.
Pros: You will learn more than you ever thought possible
Cons: You will read more than you ever thought possible

 

[dilatate]

The One-Upper Attending who doesn't even need Residency Training in Particular Specialty: Every story this attending tells begins with another doctor making a stupid mistake and her saving the day/patient's life. Of course the Hem/Onc missed lymphoma and the then PGY-1 Psych resident made the diagnosis based on the smell of the patient's breath as she asked him about his childhood (only dogs can do that). This Attending's idea of feedback is rolling her eyes or sighing. Yeah, you try to figure out which one is worse while she goes and saves more lives.

 

[78222]

The 6 Year Old:
This attending, despite appearing to be in his late 40s, is really much closer in emotional development to a 6 year old. When things are not going right or his favorite toy is not on the OR tray (or just handed to him the wrong way) he will throw a tantrum which often involves threats of 1. leaving the OR 2. "never doing another case here again". He also tends to critique whichever way the intern/resident/student is doing something and take away whatever they are doing only to do it the exact same way.

Pros: Like a child, he forgets he is angry pretty quickly
Cons: Total douchebag

*luckily I didn't get this guy as my attending*

 

[smq123]

Dr. Chip On His Shoulder:

Loves his specialty with a fiery passion. Assumes that every student rotating through wants to practice that specialty as well. Takes it personally when you tell him that you actually want to specialize in something else. Seems to think that not choosing his specialty makes you an awful person that tortures puppies and kittens. Lets it show on his evaluation.

Pros: Will love you, no matter what you do, if you actually DO want to go into his field.
Cons: Refuses to teach (because that would be a "waste of time and effort"), punishes you for being honest about your future career plans.

I had a resident just like this on my peds rotation. Apparently, my "lack of motivation" on that rotation had less to do with the fact that she was a cranky woman who couldn't teach/mentor med students for s**t, and had everything to do with the fact that I don't want to be a pediatrician. 🙄