Waitlist Support Group 2017-2018

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eggsbenny said:
Same lmao. Also on 2 WL and waiting on a post II decision. I'm mildly excited during normal business hours and then sad otherwise haha
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Wow joining the 2wl + 1 post ii decision still, although one of mine wl is bottom 1/3

Legit just spam refresh on sdn school threads and email at work all day
 
realperson9018 said:
I feel like garbage, you guys. I have a gut feeling I’ll be stuck on waitlists forever. Sorry I have nothing beneficial to add to this thread, but I just had to vent a little. Good luck to everyone else still waiting patiently.
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I know this process is rough (on 2 WL myself with no acceptances) and it takes a lot out of you but you have to figure that everything happens for a reason. Maybe you don’t get in this cycle, do some amazing work in the meantime and reapply and get accepted to an even better school (with a butt load of financial aid and scholarships).
 
realperson9018 said:
I feel like garbage, you guys. I have a gut feeling I’ll be stuck on waitlists forever. Sorry I have nothing beneficial to add to this thread, but I just had to vent a little. Good luck to everyone else still waiting patiently.
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medschoolzombie said:
Same man. There’s plenty of us here who feel that way too. I’m on 2 WL and still waiting for a post II decision but I’m still trying to keep the hope alive really because I don’t want to go through the process of reapplying again
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Just remember, you (and anyone else in the same position as we are) are most certainly NOT garbage. You've achieved interviews at multiple medical schools (seeing as you said waitlistS), something that most people (and many applicants) don't even get to do. On top of that, they didn't reject you. In fact, these schools effectively said "hey, we like you and think you've got all the qualifications to go here." You've had professionals, who are almost certainly physicians and PhDs, write letters recommending you to medical schools. To have come this far, you must have an amazing repertoire of experiences and a resume that would kick butt and impress any other profession or professional school. You are not garbage nor are you a failure. This is a road bump. You've demonstrated that medical schools DO want you, but maybe this year just isn't the year.

I'll level with you: I've been feeling the same way for the last few months, especially since May began. I'm on 3 WLs with 0 acceptances. I've felt hopeless, like a failure. I've wanted to become a doctor my entire life, like a lot of people on this thread, and kept perseverating over the fact that I've been spending my entire life striving to become a doctor...only to fail when it mattered most. I kept telling myself I failed myself, my friends, and my family who all believed in me and told me I'd make a great doctor. I dragged myself around my house, stopped going to the gym, started eating less, and just generally wallowed in my own misery. Honestly, I probably exhibited all the clinical signs of depression.

But I got a wake-up call last week that I desperately needed. My dad has Marfan's syndrome and has been following a cardiologist his entire life. In recent years, his aorta has been steadily increasing in size. A few months ago, he got imaging that showed his aorta was around 4.8cm. His cardiologist has really been pushing aorta surgery for the last 2-3 years, but the timeframe was pushed up in light of this. At that time, the plan was to get his aorta replaced by the fall. Last week, he got another echo + CTA which showed that his aorta is now somewhere between 4.9-5.1cm, a significant increase from just a few months ago. On top of that, the CTA showed possible CAD and prompted a cath a few days later. Luckily, the cath was clean, but we have seen 3 different surgeons within the last week and are aiming to schedule aortic root replacement for the beginning of ~July.

I'll tell you what, knowing that your dad is getting massive surgery in a few weeks makes the miseries of being on a med school waitlist seem really, really insignificant. Furthermore, I've seen too many ruptured aortic dissections in my ED, so knowing that my dad has an aorta teetering on the edge of disaster doesn't make it any easier to sleep at night - and you know we've both had too many sleepless nights, contemplating what we're gonna do if we don't get in to med school. I thought I had come to the conclusion that my problems paled in comparison to my dad's REAL and immediate health problems, but I was still moping around. 2 nights ago, my dad got sick of it. He had been cutting me slack for the last few weeks, but straight up told me: "You're not dying. You are going to get into med school eventually. Get. Over. It."

And you know what? I really needed that. God forbid anyone else has to balance all this med school crap with significant family health issues, but this has really given me the wake-up call I needed. Since then, I've truly accepted that I'm going to reapply and have officially restarted the process. And, honestly, I've felt so much better since getting the ball rolling (surprisingly). I dreaded calling up my old professors and asking the doctors I work with for letters for a SECOND time, but I felt better after doing it. These people still believe in me - and I'm sure your people still believe in you too.

My advice is to do what I did and accept that you will reapply (and start reapplying) because, mentally, I feel 1,000,000x better now. You are not garbage and you WILL get into medical school. If you really want this, this waitlist year is just a speed bump. Going through this has only made me appreciate the act of getting into med school and becoming a doctor. It's no longer something that I felt I was destined or entitled to, it's something that I have realized I want more than anything else - and that's why I'm going to keep at it until I get in, whenever that may be.

If your situation has been anything like mine was, you got sick of people telling you "you'll get in this year, just wait!" or, even better, "you'll get in eventually!" I hated having people tell me either of those things, but they're probably right - one way or the other. I urge you to not see this year as a failure, see it as motivation. Don't perseverate about not getting into med school... because it's not making you any better of a person nor an applicant. Instead, make yourself a better person and applicant so you will get in next time around.

I'm trying to look on the bright side: I can totally improve my MCAT, bolster my volunteering, and probably have a shot at much better schools next time around. More importantly (for my situation at least), I'll be home to help take care of my dad and family after my dad gets his chest ripped open to have his aorta replaced this summer. Like I said, I know that a lot of people have probably told you the same thing (in much fewer words) that I have with this wall of text, but if you've come this far to get waitlisted, know that: 1) You are not garbage. 2) Medical schools DO want you and you WILL get into medical school. 2) Everyone you know still does truly believe in you... and I believe in you too.

Hopefully this wall of text helps someone else on this thread, but it was definitely therapeutic and cathartic for me to just get this all off my chest.
 
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Arturiase said:
Wow joining the 2wl + 1 post ii decision still, although one of mine wl is bottom 1/3

Legit just spam refresh on sdn school threads and email at work all day
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We must be the same person lol. Also at the bottom third for one WL
 
I’m at another point where I have to choose between believing the possible vs the probably. An advisor at my dream school told me that it was possible I could still get an interview at the school but it was more likely that I probably would not. At that time, even when things looked really dim and there was only 3 weeks of interviews left, I told him I’d believe the possible because believing that is what got me through my life. Low and behold the next week, I opened my email and there was the invite. I’m trying to remember this as I go into this week that anything can happen just like it did before.
 
MareNostrummm said:
Idk man DO schools are much more reasonable to get into but you don't get that MD "prize" I guess.
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On 3 waitlists right now for MD. 5+ DO acceptances. In my mind, getting into an MD school is almost exclusively a pride thing. I don't even want to pursue a competitive speciality but I just want to be able to wave my big bad MD acceptance around in front of other people's big stupid faces.

My gf is an M1 and I'm meeting her parents in a couple weeks and I'm just dreading the inevitable what's a DO question.




Sent from my iPhone using SDN mobile
 
Rei02sDinnerParty said:
On 3 waitlists right now for MD. 5+ DO acceptances. In my mind, getting into an MD school is almost exclusively a pride thing. I don't even want to pursue a competitive speciality but I just want to be able to wave my big bad MD acceptance around in front of other people's big stupid faces.

My gf is an M1 and I'm meeting her parents in a couple weeks and I'm just dreading the inevitable what's a DO question.




Sent from my iPhone using SDN mobile
Click to expand...

You pretty much summed up the reason for the majority of people, aside for those few aiming straight for Derm/Ortho/Opth/ENT/NSG etc.. I feel like MD schools scrutinize every little thing on your app in an unhealthy way. Is there really a difference in competency between someone who got into MD vs someone who got waitlisted at MD and had to go DO?

I was interested in academic medicine because I enjoy research, so going DO will be a disadvantage for me, but I'm not going to reapply no matter what.
 
MareNostrummm said:
You pretty much summed up the reason for the majority of people, aside for those few aiming straight for Derm/Ortho/Opth/ENT/NSG etc.. I feel like MD schools scrutinize every little thing on your app in an unhealthy way. Is there really a difference in competency between someone who got into MD vs someone who got waitlisted at MD and had to go DO?

I was interested in academic medicine because I enjoy research, so going DO will be a disadvantage for me, but I'm not going to reapply no matter what.
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Or... it will make you more unique!
 
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I wonder which schools usually have overlap with Tulane? Can anyone shed light?
 
realperson9018 said:
I feel like garbage, you guys. I have a gut feeling I’ll be stuck on waitlists forever. Sorry I have nothing beneficial to add to this thread, but I just had to vent a little. Good luck to everyone else still waiting patiently.
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Med school doesn't deserve to make you feel like that.
VancZos said:
Just remember, you (and anyone else in the same position as we are) are most certainly NOT garbage. You've achieved interviews at multiple medical schools (seeing as you said waitlistS), something that most people (and many applicants) don't even get to do. On top of that, they didn't reject you. In fact, these schools effectively said "hey, we like you and think you've got all the qualifications to go here." You've had professionals, who are almost certainly physicians and PhDs, write letters recommending you to medical schools. To have come this far, you must have an amazing repertoire of experiences and a resume that would kick butt and impress any other profession or professional school. You are not garbage nor are you a failure. This is a road bump. You've demonstrated that medical schools DO want you, but maybe this year just isn't the year.

I'll level with you: I've been feeling the same way for the last few months, especially since May began. I'm on 3 WLs with 0 acceptances. I've felt hopeless, like a failure. I've wanted to become a doctor my entire life, like a lot of people on this thread, and kept perseverating over the fact that I've been spending my entire life striving to become a doctor...only to fail when it mattered most. I kept telling myself I failed myself, my friends, and my family who all believed in me and told me I'd make a great doctor. I dragged myself around my house, stopped going to the gym, started eating less, and just generally wallowed in my own misery. Honestly, I probably exhibited all the clinical signs of depression.

But I got a wake-up call last week that I desperately needed. My dad has Marfan's syndrome and has been following a cardiologist his entire life. In recent years, his aorta has been steadily increasing in size. A few months ago, he got imaging that showed his aorta was around 4.8cm. His cardiologist has really been pushing aorta surgery for the last 2-3 years, but the timeframe was pushed up in light of this. At that time, the plan was to get his aorta replaced by the fall. Last week, he got another echo + CTA which showed that his aorta is now somewhere between 4.9-5.1cm, a significant increase from just a few months ago. On top of that, the CTA showed possible CAD and prompted a cath a few days later. Luckily, the cath was clean, but we have seen 3 different surgeons within the last week and are aiming to schedule aortic root replacement for the beginning of ~July.

I'll tell you what, knowing that your dad is getting massive surgery in a few weeks makes the miseries of being on a med school waitlist seem really, really insignificant. Furthermore, I've seen too many ruptured aortic dissections in my ED, so knowing that my dad has an aorta teetering on the edge of disaster doesn't make it any easier to sleep at night - and you know we've both had too many sleepless nights, contemplating what we're gonna do if we don't get in to med school. I thought I had come to the conclusion that my problems paled in comparison to my dad's REAL and immediate health problems, but I was still moping around. 2 nights ago, my dad got sick of it. He had been cutting me slack for the last few weeks, but straight up told me: "You're not dying. You are going to get into med school eventually. Get. Over. It."

And you know what? I really needed that. God forbid anyone else has to balance all this med school crap with significant family health issues, but this has really given me the wake-up call I needed. Since then, I've truly accepted that I'm going to reapply and have officially restarted the process. And, honestly, I've felt so much better since getting the ball rolling (surprisingly). I dreaded calling up my old professors and asking the doctors I work with for letters for a SECOND time, but I felt better after doing it. These people still believe in me - and I'm sure your people still believe in you too.

My advice is to do what I did and accept that you will reapply (and start reapplying) because, mentally, I feel 1,000,000x better now. You are not garbage and you WILL get into medical school. If you really want this, this waitlist year is just a speed bump. Going through this has only made me appreciate the act of getting into med school and becoming a doctor. It's no longer something that I felt I was destined or entitled to, it's something that I have realized I want more than anything else - and that's why I'm going to keep at it until I get in, whenever that may be.

If your situation has been anything like mine was, you got sick of people telling you "you'll get in this year, just wait!" or, even better, "you'll get in eventually!" I hated having people tell me either of those things, but they're probably right - one way or the other. I urge you to not see this year as a failure, see it as motivation. Don't perseverate about not getting into med school... because it's not making you any better of a person nor an applicant. Instead, make yourself a better person and applicant so you will get in next time around.

I'm trying to look on the bright side: I can totally improve my MCAT, bolster my volunteering, and probably have a shot at much better schools next time around. More importantly (for my situation at least), I'll be home to help take care of my dad and family after my dad gets his chest ripped open to have his aorta replaced this summer. Like I said, I know that a lot of people have probably told you the same thing (in much fewer words) that I have with this wall of text, but if you've come this far to get waitlisted, know that: 1) You are not garbage. 2) Medical schools DO want you and you WILL get into medical school. 2) Everyone you know still does truly believe in you... and I believe in you too.

Hopefully this wall of text helps someone else on this thread, but it was definitely therapeutic and cathartic for me to just get this all off my chest.
Click to expand...

This was so beautiful and so necessary. I'm thankful for how raw and full of emotion this was. Sending all my positive vibes to your dad and family. Dad and heart issues are a soft spot for me. Whoever you are I hope we become classmates one day.
 
damien123123 said:
Isn't there a decent amount of waitlist movement in general in June and July? Isn't May a little "early" in terms of waitlist movement or no?
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Well in past years most movement was in May with some in June and very little in July. Most people think movement is slower this year but I don't know if that's true or just a result of us being in this cycle combined with neuroticism
 
medschoolzombie said:
Well in past years most movement was in May with some in June and very little in July. Most people think movement is slower this year but I don't know if that's true or just a result of us being in this cycle combined with neuroticism
Click to expand...

Alright I see. I emailed the school that I'm currently at the bottom 1/3 of the waitlist at and they said they are almost to the bottom. Don;'t know if I should keep my hopes up or not.
 
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medschoolzombie said:
So I just discovered that the 2018-2019 threads were up. Man the reality that this cycle is basically over is really starting to sink in about now.
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I tried so hard and got so far but in the end it doesn't even matter!

 
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It’s been three weeks now since Traffic Day. Throughout the year I’ve found myself frequently fantasizing about the moment I get my first acceptance—the moment I can finally breathe and live my life—but as time keeps passing without any word from my WL schools, those thoughts move deeper into the territory of fantasy, further away from the realm of my reality.

I’ve submitted meaningful updates, sent letters, and called the offices to make sure my presence was felt. My fate is ultimately out of my control now, and hence the title of the thread, we can only truly wait at this point. Much of this educational path is about waiting: patience is a virtue, good things come to those who wait, and delayed gratification. The proselytism of deferring happiness to the future is really testing my endurance.

In the rare occasion that I’m not thinking about the WL, I’ll catch myself laughing or smiling and feel immediate guilt because I’ve cheated this process of waiting. I feel like I don’t deserve even an irrelevant, ephemeral moment of happiness because I haven’t yet earned it. Whenever I do my hobbies that usually bring me joy, or when I eat my favorite food, I can only subconsciously think, “I would enjoy this much more if I got into medical school, when I truly have earned it.”

My attitude is probably more extreme than many of yours, but for those with zero acceptances, I hope some of you can relate to a little of what I’ve said.
 
MareNostrummm said:
Einstein has been having huge waitlist movement...
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I think (emphasis on think) that this is because they waitlisted almost everyone since January, instead of giving straight acceptances - at least largely referring off SDN data. So most of these "waitlist" acceptances are just delayed normal ones, aided in part by their "high priority" waitlist and normal one. You would think, just based off numbers, that this large movement would result in increased movement in other schools, which may be happening a little, but this isn't really seen. So, I have a hunch they are accepting people off the list that are in somewhere "ranked" significantly higher, and these people are then just declining the offers which leads to more movement at Einstein. This could also account for recent waitlisting of applicants that interviewed earlier, as a result of them exhausting their current waitlist pool. Just thinking out loud. I know they had to accept at least the number of seats by an earlier date, but you can tell by their correspondence with applicants that they are playing this cycle very safe.
 
fourandtwo said:
I wonder which schools usually have overlap with Tulane? Can anyone shed light?
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All the private schools with a median MCAT around 511 and all the publics with a median around 511 that accept a significant number of OOS (especially in the south and southeast).
 
gyngyn said:
There have been multiple acceptances at Mt. Sinai since we last spoke.
There are new acceptances at Einstein, as well.
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I saw on the WL thread from last year or the year before that you saw noted decent USF movement, do you usually see some where you are or is it uncommon? I know some people with my interview where from CA etc. Thanks!
 
boogiecousins94 said:
I saw on the WL thread from last year or the year before that you saw noted decent USF movement, do you usually see some where you are or is it uncommon? I know some people with my interview where from CA etc. Thanks!
Click to expand...
It's been a while since the last time I saw someone we interviewed get an acceptance at USF!
So they may be having movement, but I can't see it.
 
setokaiba01 said:
Med school doesn't deserve to make you feel like that.


This was so beautiful and so necessary. I'm thankful for how raw and full of emotion this was. Sending all my positive vibes to your dad and family. Dad and heart issues are a soft spot for me. Whoever you are I hope we become classmates one day.
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Likewise!!

EngageEi8ht said:
My attitude is probably more extreme than many of yours, but for those with zero acceptances, I hope some of you can relate to a little of what I’ve said.
Click to expand...

The thing is, a lot of us share (or DID share in) that same mentality - and if you just look through the last page or two, you’ll see plenty of people expressing the exact same sentiment. However, I HATED when my friends would try to empathize with me or tell me they’re feeling the same way. I didn’t want to believe it; I wanted to believe I felt WORSE, and that feeling justified itself, creating a vicious cycle of depression and self-pity. If you ask me, it sounds like you’re falling into the same trap I did.

The truth is, everyone going through this feels like crap and your attitude isn’t more extreme than the next person who is sitting on multiple WLs and no acceptances - I say this because I am in the exact same situation. And I’m sure there are plenty of people reading this that feel the same.

I can only speak for myself, but I was wallowing in my own self pity (which I posted about on the last page). It’s not healthy nor productive and won’t solve anything nor will it make you a better person/applicant/doctor. You said it yourself: there’s nothing more you can do - so just get over it and move on. Focus on reapplying, on improving yourself and your application. Since I’ve had that realization and started the reapplication process, I’ve been feeling so much happier (somehow?) and back to my normal self.

Whatever you decide to do, I hope you get out of this funk because I was the same way and know how absolutely awful it is. Coming this far is proof that you deserve to be in med school and I believe (and am confident!) that you will get in (whether it’s this year or later).
 
I'm on three waitlists at in state schools, since its a few weeks since traffic day, is there still a significant amount of movement? Or should I gear up and fill out AMCAS again?
 
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EngageEi8ht said:
It’s been three weeks now since Traffic Day. Throughout the year I’ve found myself frequently fantasizing about the moment I get my first acceptance—the moment I can finally breathe and live my life—but as time keeps passing without any word from my WL schools, those thoughts move deeper into the territory of fantasy, further away from the realm of my reality.

I’ve submitted meaningful updates, sent letters, and called the offices to make sure my presence was felt. My fate is ultimately out of my control now, and hence the title of the thread, we can only truly wait at this point. Much of this educational path is about waiting: patience is a virtue, good things come to those who wait, and delayed gratification. The proselytism of deferring happiness to the future is really testing my endurance.

In the rare occasion that I’m not thinking about the WL, I’ll catch myself laughing or smiling and feel immediate guilt because I’ve cheated this process of waiting. I feel like I don’t deserve even an irrelevant, ephemeral moment of happiness because I haven’t yet earned it. Whenever I do my hobbies that usually bring me joy, or when I eat my favorite food, I can only subconsciously think, “I would enjoy this much more if I got into medical school, when I truly have earned it.”

My attitude is probably more extreme than many of yours, but for those with zero acceptances, I hope some of you can relate to a little of what I’ve said.
Click to expand...

I'm sorry but what is wrong with you people? How can you tie every ounce of happiness you have to one thing. There is so much more to life than getting into med school. So many people wish they had your problems. I agree this attitude seems a little extreme.
 
premed4747 said:
I'm sorry but what is wrong with you people? How can you tie every ounce of happiness you have to one thing. There is so much more to life than getting into med school. So many people wish they had your problems. I agree this attitude seems a little extreme.
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We’re at the end of the cycle and are wallowing in pity for a bit.I like to think it’s gonna be temporary but for some people, I’m sure it’s gonna take a while to get over it. If anything (at least for me) it’s mainly the uncertainty in my life that’s killing my happy mood most days. Not getting in means getting ready to go through this all over again, not knowing if you should keep the hope alive and save the money that would be wasted from applying if you got in, start looking for a (likely) low paying (scribe) job or the sort to bump up certain parts of your app, watching everyone else celebrating that they got in while you’re left wondering where it all went wrong, going back to your letter writers and telling them you didn’t get in and need another letter, and knowing that your best wasn’t good enough.

Overall it’s not the end of the world. It’s only a minor setback but soo many people have known for a very long Time that this is what they wanted to do and this is the last major barrier of entry to their lifelong dream that they’ve spent years working towards. It does hurt knowing you’re so close yet so far at the same time
 
premed4747 said:
I'm sorry but what is wrong with you people? How can you tie every ounce of happiness you have to one thing. There is so much more to life than getting into med school. So many people wish they had your problems. I agree this attitude seems a little extreme.
Click to expand...
No offense, but would you say "snap out of it, it could be worse" to a patient struggling with depression? I certainly hope not.
 
premed4747 said:
I'm sorry but what is wrong with you people? How can you tie every ounce of happiness you have to one thing. There is so much more to life than getting into med school. So many people wish they had your problems. I agree this attitude seems a little extreme.
Click to expand...

Signature: Admitted MD Class of 2022.

Do you even know our struggle?

Jk but people worked really hard to get this far to not get in.. let them be emo in the Waitlist Support Group 2017-2018. To succeed its an all or nothing kind of thing, so people feel defeated at the end.
 
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premed4747 said:
I'm sorry but what is wrong with you people? How can you tie every ounce of happiness you have to one thing. There is so much more to life than getting into med school. So many people wish they had your problems. I agree this attitude seems a little extreme.
Click to expand...
Not to alienate other folks but I'm going to have to agree with this post (minus the "What is wrong with you people" part for obvious reasons). Seeking happiness in an undefined future is not always the best when looking at the big picture, especially in medicine. In undergrad, you delay happiness for med school (guilty of this myself). In med school, for residency. In residency, for getting a top job/fellowship. After getting a job, you look forward to "move up the ranks". After that, you look forward to retirement. In retirement, you look forward to death.

Sorry for the morbid imagery, but I'm trying to make a point. Live in the moment. It sucks almost making it and instead being waitlisted. I know it must be especially terrible for those who have no acceptances now at this point. While this may take time, take a step back. Enjoy the things around you: your friends, family, the world around you, and life itself. Be proud of yourself and what you've done prior to applying. That way nothing like being waitlisted can take anything from you. When June 1st comes around, send in that new app or work towards improving ECs/stats/that "x factor" for apps down the line. My 2 cents.

Pylorii said:
No offense, but would you say "snap out of it, it could be worse" to a patient struggling with depression? I certainly hope not.
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100% serious for anyone having legitimate depressive thoughts, seek out social groups and counseling if possible/affordable. This process is terribly exhausting and self-care is important. I nevertheless still think it's important to look at the bigger picture: not "get over it"--that's the idiotic, lazy thing for someone like me not in this situation to say. Instead, see how to smile and step forward despite (or in spite?) of waitlists. Again, this is just my n=1 perspective.
 
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premed4747 said:
Did you really just compare this situation to a patient with depression lmao
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You actually don't know if any of the people posting on this thread are going through depression.
I think everyone needs to back off.

It is nice to have perspective, yes. But this waiting process is difficult, and I wouldn't doubt if some people on this thread are experiencing depression.

The rude comments are not necessary here. Look at the title of the thread... SUPPORT.
So if you don't have anything nice to say, just leave us alone we were having a good time here before.
 
grateful_phys said:
You actually don't know if any of the people posting on this thread are going through depression.
I think everyone needs to back off.

It is nice to have perspective, yes. But this waiting process is difficult, and I wouldn't doubt if some people on this thread are experiencing depression.

The rude comments are not necessary here. Look at the title of the thread... SUPPORT.
So if you don't have anything nice to say, just leave us alone we were having a good time here before.
Click to expand...

Just to clarify I'm rooting for all you guys. I actually am waitlisted at one of my top choices as well and came here to join the club. I just felt like the self-pity was a little too much and people could benefit from a little perspective. I don't think I have been rude at all.
 
premed4747 said:
Did you really just compare this situation to a patient with depression lmao
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Did you really think that post had no signs of depressive thoughts? I think you would be surprised if you look up the diagnostic criteria for clinical depression. I believe you do mean well, but I hope you understand that this forum may be the only outlet available to many users on here. Responding to someone who is obviously sharing very secure thoughts by stating "what is wrong with you people" is problematic.
 
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