- Joined
- Aug 7, 2006
- Messages
- 34
- Reaction score
- 0
OK, I know that I'm going to get a lot of flak for this, but I really need some advice.
I'm a student soon to graduate from a NYC-area medical school. On a recent rotation, my very cool team went out for drinks after a particularly depressing day. (Don't worry, no one there was on call, that's not the ethical dilemma!) Gradually, as the night went on and we got drunker and drunker, the group started to slowly dissipate. Eventually, only me and my attending were left at the bar. Now, the attending is probably the most desired woman in the hospital...tall, beautiful, hilarious sense of humor and great personality. Nearly every male patient has semi-jokingly said that they'll try to get admitted again, or that they won't leave the hospital until she goes with them. She's single, and quite unobtainable.
Anyway, we were the only ones from the team left at the bar, and we were quite blasted. At work, she dresses very professionally, but that night, she was dressed like a sexy college girl. We were flirting like mad and dancing until it was too late to stay. Since we live somewhat near each other, we shared a cab back to our neighborhood. Well, in the cab the flirting took a physical turn and we started making out. The cab got to her apartment first, and she insisted that I come upstairs. I wasn't going to argue. You can imagine what happened next.
When we woke up, we were surprised to find that neither of us was very embarrassed about our drunken behavior, and we went at it again. She was going to a conference the next day, so we didn't see each other for a few days. We both assumed that it was a quick fling, and it was over. But when she got back, we were constantly sneaking off "to radiology" or the call room, or to her or my place after work. It was intense. The forbiddenness of the relationship took it to a whole other level.
Of course, as you can imagine, eventually this had to end. After several weeks, she started to get a little demanding with me, and we started to grow cold. Another girl I was interested in had recently come back on the market after breaking up with her long-time boyfriend, and she was making moves on me. So, the atttending and I broke it off calmly. Or so I thought.
Several weeks later, when I was on a different rotation, I got an email from the Dean's office that I should come in for a talk. I was never so nervous in my life. I get there, and he asks me how I thought I did on the previous rotations. I honestly said I did great, my patients loved me, I learned a lot, I was always eager to do some scut work, etc, etc. He said that he had gotten a letter from my former attending (which I did NOT solicit) which basically said I was a horrible student, constanty shirking my responsibilities, with no drive, and lack of respect for his superiors.
This was all TOTALLY FALSE!!! Clearly, she was pissed off about me wanting to end the fling, and this is how she took it out on me! I HAD NO IDEA she was this vengeful! I thought we broke it off calmly!
So, now I am in a bind. Do I shut my mouth and let this horrible letter remain in my file, potentially ruining my chances of a decent residency? Or do I spill my guts to the dean and tell him about my highly unethical affair with my superior? Even if I do, who's to say he'll believe me?? What if she denies the whole thing? Then I'll look like a terrible student AND a liar!!
I really don't know what to do anymore, and I'm desperate for some advice!! HELP!!
I'm a student soon to graduate from a NYC-area medical school. On a recent rotation, my very cool team went out for drinks after a particularly depressing day. (Don't worry, no one there was on call, that's not the ethical dilemma!) Gradually, as the night went on and we got drunker and drunker, the group started to slowly dissipate. Eventually, only me and my attending were left at the bar. Now, the attending is probably the most desired woman in the hospital...tall, beautiful, hilarious sense of humor and great personality. Nearly every male patient has semi-jokingly said that they'll try to get admitted again, or that they won't leave the hospital until she goes with them. She's single, and quite unobtainable.
Anyway, we were the only ones from the team left at the bar, and we were quite blasted. At work, she dresses very professionally, but that night, she was dressed like a sexy college girl. We were flirting like mad and dancing until it was too late to stay. Since we live somewhat near each other, we shared a cab back to our neighborhood. Well, in the cab the flirting took a physical turn and we started making out. The cab got to her apartment first, and she insisted that I come upstairs. I wasn't going to argue. You can imagine what happened next.
When we woke up, we were surprised to find that neither of us was very embarrassed about our drunken behavior, and we went at it again. She was going to a conference the next day, so we didn't see each other for a few days. We both assumed that it was a quick fling, and it was over. But when she got back, we were constantly sneaking off "to radiology" or the call room, or to her or my place after work. It was intense. The forbiddenness of the relationship took it to a whole other level.
Of course, as you can imagine, eventually this had to end. After several weeks, she started to get a little demanding with me, and we started to grow cold. Another girl I was interested in had recently come back on the market after breaking up with her long-time boyfriend, and she was making moves on me. So, the atttending and I broke it off calmly. Or so I thought.
Several weeks later, when I was on a different rotation, I got an email from the Dean's office that I should come in for a talk. I was never so nervous in my life. I get there, and he asks me how I thought I did on the previous rotations. I honestly said I did great, my patients loved me, I learned a lot, I was always eager to do some scut work, etc, etc. He said that he had gotten a letter from my former attending (which I did NOT solicit) which basically said I was a horrible student, constanty shirking my responsibilities, with no drive, and lack of respect for his superiors.
This was all TOTALLY FALSE!!! Clearly, she was pissed off about me wanting to end the fling, and this is how she took it out on me! I HAD NO IDEA she was this vengeful! I thought we broke it off calmly!
So, now I am in a bind. Do I shut my mouth and let this horrible letter remain in my file, potentially ruining my chances of a decent residency? Or do I spill my guts to the dean and tell him about my highly unethical affair with my superior? Even if I do, who's to say he'll believe me?? What if she denies the whole thing? Then I'll look like a terrible student AND a liar!!
I really don't know what to do anymore, and I'm desperate for some advice!! HELP!!