writing sample

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buggati

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Hey

what score would this essay get on the MCAT?
on the scale of J-T

Opportunities favor those who work hard.

Write a unified essay in which you perform the following tasks. Explain what you think the above statement means. Describe the specific situation in which a hardworking person might not be favored by opportunity. Discuss what you think determines when opportunity favors those who work hard.


Hard work is definitely a key factor in success. Many people have the ability to succeed; yet they are hindered because of lack of commitment. Commitment to a certain activity shows motivation and persistence for achievement of success. Many people throughout their lives are bombarded with obstacles which can be resolved through hard work. Hard work improves ability and help one attain success, but there has to be a certain level of understanding to truly achieve success.

In today’s world, there are several actors competing against each other for a limited number of roles. There are some actors who have the natural ability to be great actors, and thus they are extremely successful throughout their careers. Such actors have natural born talent. Hence they fit perfectly into many roles and give awesome performances even in the most challenging roles. However, to improve their talent they have to work hard.

Hard work is the main determining factor for an actor’s success. Great opportunities are available for actors who actually put in the time and effort to improve their talent. On the other hand, some people put in tremendous amounts of hard-work into their acting careers but they still are not as successful. There are people who do not have the natural ability for acting. However, the great commitment and dedication they put towards their career certainly does pay off and they eventually have a decent and successful career.

Success is the combination of ability and hard work. Therefore to improve ability it is essential to work hard. Great actors do have a natural ability but this ability is even more improved because of the huge amount of effort they have invested in becoming great actors. To succeed at any field one has to have motivation and dedication; this comes from hard work which in the end improves ability and thus the chances to succeed.
 
Most likely a very low score sorry to say...The writing sample must follow a extremely cut and dry format that must be followed to the teeth. You must argue for and against the prompt with very specific and concrete examples, that are REAL (world war II scenario, some president etc.) You MUST do this otherwise you will do poorly. The sample is not about expressing your creativity, but following directions.

Go here for more expanation

http://forums.studentdoctor.net/archive/index.php/t-222927.html
 
Yea...that would score pretty low...make sure you check out that link.
 
Hey

what score would this essay get on the MCAT?
on the scale of J-T

Opportunities favor those who work hard.

Write a unified essay in which you perform the following tasks. Explain what you think the above statement means. Describe the specific situation in which a hardworking person might not be favored by opportunity. Discuss what you think determines when opportunity favors those who work hard.


Hard work is definitely a key factor in success. Many people have the ability to succeed; yet they are hindered because of lack of commitment. Commitment to a certain activity shows motivation and persistence for achievement of success. Many people throughout their lives are bombarded with obstacles which can be resolved through hard work. Hard work improves ability and help one attain success, but there has to be a certain level of understanding to truly achieve success.

In today's world, there are several actors competing against each other for a limited number of roles. There are some actors who have the natural ability to be great actors, and thus they are extremely successful throughout their careers. Such actors have natural born talent. Hence they fit perfectly into many roles and give awesome performances even in the most challenging roles. However, to improve their talent they have to work hard.

Hard work is the main determining factor for an actor's success. Great opportunities are available for actors who actually put in the time and effort to improve their talent. On the other hand, some people put in tremendous amounts of hard-work into their acting careers but they still are not as successful. There are people who do not have the natural ability for acting. However, the great commitment and dedication they put towards their career certainly does pay off and they eventually have a decent and successful career.

Success is the combination of ability and hard work. Therefore to improve ability it is essential to work hard. Great actors do have a natural ability but this ability is even more improved because of the huge amount of effort they have invested in becoming great actors. To succeed at any field one has to have motivation and dedication; this comes from hard work which in the end improves ability and thus the chances to succeed.

Low score. You need to really address all of the tasks in the prompt in a clear and concise manner. It really matters little what you say or if you believe what you are saying, just make sure that you make a clear point while addressing the tasks and you will get a good score.
They asked you to explain what the statement means, give an example of when that definition (or the statement) is NOT true, and what the determining factors are for it to be true.
So:
1) When people work hard towards a goal, they oftentimes earn awards or certificates attesting to their hard work. The accolades that one receives for his/her accomplishments reflect well on the hard worker and contribute towards his/her good reputation. When seeking employment opportunities or admissions to an institution, the recruiters will be more likely to choose the applicant with good credentials over an applicant who's credentials are substandard. Hence, working hard in the present can open the door to future opportunities.
2) Give an example of someone not getting opportunities though they work hard. Maybe someone worked really hard in school, but they weren't very smart, or they got sick and it prevented them from achieving high marks and they then had few opportunities.
3) In this case, success, or accomplishment of one's personal goals are what determine whether or not this holds true. So, whatever you used for your example for task 2 can spill over into addressing task 3. Here is your time to bring in a deeper level of discussion, you can talk about how it is the combination of innate traits and hard work that will bring about opportunities. (I only was talking about school because it relates to what was said in the first paragraph, you want it all to be cohesive).

Anyway, the goal is to be cohesive, elloquent, and address the tasks (addressing the tasks is the number 1 goal though... you'll automatically get a Q if you address all of the tasks in a clear manner). Stay focused on what the prompt is asking. Trust me, I got an R on mine, but I had been scoring T's on every practice test, I just blanked out and ran out of time on one of my essays on the real thing. Good luck!
 
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