Help! Matched very far from fiancee...

fancy tickler said:

Help!

I just recently matched with the army at my second to last choice. My fiancee is also a medical student, but a civilian. His match is coming up, and while he has a little more room in where he can go he has no options even remotely close to where I'm going.

Please, any advice...

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I'm sorry to hear that, but this is one of the likely unsolveable dilemas you can find yourself in when you are a number on a list. Likely the only way would be to ask right away if you can switch to another place, or even services?

Best of luck

It's extremely unlikely that you'll get to follow your fiance around. As a civilian, he's the one who has the freedom to follow you. So I suggest being really really nice and trying to get him to apply to places closer to where you are, there must be something that's not too far away? Did you match at el paso or something?

fancy tickler said:

Help!

I just recently matched with the army at my second to last choice. My fiancee is also a medical student, but a civilian. His match is coming up, and while he has a little more room in where he can go he has no options even remotely close to where I'm going.

Please, any advice...

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I'm sorry, I truly am. You know how people on here talk about how every now and then the military just screws you over? This is one of those times. There are no good options. I'd tell him to do the best he can, and plan to use all of your respective vacation time together. If it makes you feel any better, I would often go days without seeing my family (that lived with me) awake during residency.

That really sucks. I can feel the frustration and anger all the way over here. I don't think there is anything you could do to reverse the decision. You can't turn in your resignation either because of the contractual obligation.

Where did you match? There has to be a civilian hospital with a residency training program somewhere near.

My friend (an intern) was married to a 4th year med student. She came and visited him and did a rotation in his city. They ended up spending about 2 years apart but survived and are happily married.

At least you're not already married so you don't have to go through the ugly mess of a divorce. If you do decide to go through with the wedding, have an airtight prenup as these marriages do not last. Sorry.

BomberDoc said:

At least you're not already married so you don't have to go through the ugly mess of a divorce. If you do decide to go through with the wedding, have an airtight prenup as these marriages do not last. Sorry.

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ugh, don't curse "being single in el paso" on any college graduate.

I recommend making the long distance relationship work! Did you just get el paso for internship? Or was it a continuous contract? If it's just an internship, you can try and move elsewhere next year. And even if it's continuous, you can probably get out of it after internship, although that could complicate future residency plans.

BomberDoc said:

At least you're not already married so you don't have to go through the ugly mess of a divorce. If you do decide to go through with the wedding, have an airtight prenup as these marriages do not last. Sorry.

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For the original poster, when you are getting out of the military it is a tradition to become a "short timer" and haze the people coming in. I think BomberDoc's insensitive remarks reflect this.

fancy tickler said:

Help!

I just recently matched with the army at my second to last choice. My fiancee is also a medical student, but a civilian. His match is coming up, and while he has a little more room in where he can go he has no options even remotely close to where I'm going.

Please, any advice...

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like the old German POW camp movies.... " For you, Ze Var is Over mien friend "

At that jacked up post, the best you could possibly hope for is leaving with the same rank you arrived with.

Being geographically separated is the least of your problems. See for yourself.

fancy tickler said:

Help!

I just recently matched with the army at my second to last choice. My fiancee is also a medical student, but a civilian. His match is coming up, and while he has a little more room in where he can go he has no options even remotely close to where I'm going.

Please, any advice...

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Wow, lots of anger. Maybe she wants to get married. Yeesh. El Paso is on the Southwest path from Houston, Dallas and Austin to Phoenix and the tix are pretty cheap. Internship may be rough but after that you could spend many weekends together if he matched to one of those cities. Or, have him take a year off doing research or something and see where you can get from there.

Gastrapathy said:

Wow, lots of anger. Maybe she wants to get married. Yeesh. El Paso is on the Southwest path from Houston, Dallas and Austin to Phoenix and the tix are pretty cheap. Internship may be rough but after that you could spend many weekends together if he matched to one of those cities. Or, have him take a year off doing research or something and see where you can get from there.

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It's not the City, it's the Post that's screwed up. You won't have time to breathe there. Believe me, they've already got your name and people already stuck there are fighting over who gets to pimp you first.

Worst assignment in the army. Try asking some soldiers with some time under their belt.

Oh BTW, that's where the CSM academy is, so you'll have plenty of high school graduates with too much rank and too much time on their hands in the last throws of their career driving you bananas demanding special treatment and buffing up their disablity claims just prior to retirement.

enjoy.

alpha62 said:

It's not the City, it's the Post that's screwed up. You won't have time to breathe there. Believe me, they've already got your name and people already stuck there are fighting over who gets to pimp you first.

Worst assignment in the army. Try asking some soldiers with some time under their belt.

Oh BTW, that's where the CSM academy is, so you'll have plenty of high school graduates with too much rank and too much time on their hands in the last throws of their career driving you bananas demanding special treatment and buffing up their disablity claims just prior to retirement.

enjoy.

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Dude, she's an intern. Her schedule is completely inflexible and already determined. She won't get stuck doing retirement physicals in sick call, that falls to people like you. And, she's headed there regardless and asked for advice about options for colocating with a nonmilitary intern. She's going to "leave the same rank she arrived" since she won't stay there long enough to get promoted.

I understand all the angst and anger but I fail to see how these comments do anything to help the OP.

Your fiancee' can match @ UT-SA, Scott and White, UTSW, UT-Houston, Texas Tech, UNM, U of A. Plenty of places close by to El Paso..

Texas Tech has several residency programs at Thomason Hospital in El Paso. I think that Emergency Med, Int Med, Peds and Ortho for sure. I think they have transitional internships also. It is not very competitive as I remember many foreign medical grads in programs there. Some of the WBAMC residents rotate there (Ortho, Gen Surg).

Gastrapathy said:

Dude, she's an intern. Her schedule is completely inflexible and already determined. She won't get stuck doing retirement physicals in sick call, that falls to people like you. And, she's headed there regardless and asked for advice about options for colocating with a nonmilitary intern. She's going to "leave the same rank she arrived" since she won't stay there long enough to get promoted.

I understand all the angst and anger but I fail to see how these comments do anything to help the OP.

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somebody forgot to tell the command that when they stuck a bunch of interns down in the salt mines of the MOB site when OIF started.

Gastrapathy said:

Dude, she's an intern. Her schedule is completely inflexible and already determined. She won't get stuck doing retirement physicals in sick call, that falls to people like you. And, she's headed there regardless and asked for advice about options for colocating with a nonmilitary intern. She's going to "leave the same rank she arrived" since she won't stay there long enough to get promoted.

I understand all the angst and anger but I fail to see how these comments do anything to help the OP.

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6 months from now, she'll find my advice is sound. Many is the GI that walked on that post thinking they're going to get in and get out. It's a career hobbling vortex.

She may be on a education track, but who and where do you think all this ankle biting crap from the line gets turfed to ? Not only that, the MEDCEN is on the border, and it's no different than any other facility on the border with all it's headaches

they're swimming with sharks, even if it's a year, My advice is forget about your boyfriend for a while and keep your mind on your mission and survive.
The only way to your boyfriend is straight through this hostile lane of fire.

CaptainZero said:

I'm in a rather similar situation -being away from a sig other due to where I matched. I'll be in el paso too (my last choice) for my transitional year...we can comissurate together

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Problem solved...!!!

CaptainZero and Fancy Tickler hooks up... to "comissurate together" for a year...

The saga continues...

Texas Tech has several residency programs at Thomason Hospital in El Paso. I think that Emergency Med, Int Med, Peds and Ortho for sure. I think they have transitional internships also. It is not very competitive as I remember many foreign medical grads in programs there. Some of the WBAMC residents rotate there (Ortho, Gen Surg).

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Actually Tech has general surgery,medicine,ER,OB-GYN,Peds. They do not have Ortho, the ortho program is a combined Army program with WBAMC and does not have civilian residents.

To the OP-I do feel your pain. Being apart from your significant other is difficult and I wish there was a better solution. By the way what program did you match into?