Break ups in medical school

[Derivations]

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Yeah, should have done it a while ago. Thanks everyone.

 

[MadRadLad]

Yeah, should have done it a while ago. Thanks everyone.

Think of it this way. Currently in your life, what you have going for you is that you're working hard to kick ass on an exam which is putting you one step closer to becoming a doctor, where you can truly say you will have a direct impact in improving the quality of thousands of lives. You are pushing yourself towards a very tangible and achievable goal which (rightfully) is taking up a lot of your time in the process. In other words, onward and upward.

On the other hand, she's spending her time trying to cook up some half-assed way to get you angry, and basically reinforcing what a ****ty person she is. Clearly, she's lacking anything better to do.

Gotta say, you've got this breakup won by a mile. You two are trending in completely opposite directions. I know it's hard to let go of the fact that you were in a long term relationship, but you should thank your stars that you dodged an iceberg and jumped off that sinking ship.

 

[jw3600]

Block her. She's pond scum compared to you. You have more important things to worry about like NOT FAILING YOUR EXAM ON MONDAY.

#gostudy

Can we finally say the dirty word match and find out where Kaus is going?

 

[Derivations]

Think of it this way. Currently in your life, what you have going for you is that you're working hard to kick ass on an exam which is putting you one step closer to becoming a doctor, where you can truly say you will have a direct impact in improving the quality of thousands of lives. You are pushing yourself towards a very tangible and achievable goal which (rightfully) is taking up a lot of your time in the process. In other words, onward and upward.

On the other hand, she's spending her time trying to cook up some half-assed way to get you angry, and basically reinforcing what a ****ty person she is. Clearly, she's lacking anything better to do.

Gotta say, you've got this breakup won by a mile. You two are trending in completely opposite directions. I know it's hard to let go of the fact that you were in a long term relationship, but you should thank your stars that you dodged an iceberg and jumped off that sinking ship.

Yeah for sure. Thanks for this post!

 

[DougieMcBuckets]

Long time lurker that came across this thread and I thought I would make a post for some advice.

So I am currently in a long distance relationship and I will be matriculating at a school where neither my SO or I live. We have talked about whether we should move to one another or stay long distance. My main concern is that I know how time consuming my studies will be during medical school and I currently hope to match into a competitive residency. I feel that my SO doesn't realize how much time I will spend towards studying, and I don't know if he will be able to handle me not having a ton of time to do fun things. I am worried that I won't be able to please him and it is going to cause problems sooner or later.

What advice would you guys give me? How difficult is it to maintain a relationship during medical school? My SOand I are extremely compatible, but it kills me to make him move to me while I pursue medical school and he will once again have to follow me to residency. Would it save us both a lot of time to end it before making the step of moving together?

Thanks!

 

[cookiemonsters]

Just break up with him in July and save yourself a few thousand dollars in wasted plane tickets.

 

[fancymylotus]

Long time lurker that came across this thread and I thought I would make a post for some advice.

So I am currently in a long distance relationship and I will be matriculating at a school where neither my SO or I live. We have talked about whether we should move to one another or stay long distance. My main concern is that I know how time consuming my studies will be during medical school and I currently hope to match into a competitive residency. I feel that my SO doesn't realize how much time I will spend towards studying, and I don't know if he will be able to handle me not having a ton of time to do fun things. I am worried that I won't be able to please him and it is going to cause problems sooner or later.

What advice would you guys give me? How difficult is it to maintain a relationship during medical school? My SOand I are extremely compatible, but it kills me to make him move to me while I pursue medical school and he will once again have to follow me to residency. Would it save us both a lot of time to end it before making the step of moving together?

Thanks!

Take it from someone who did it.
Long distance relationships while one person is in med school...damn near ****ing impossible
Only worked for me bc I 1)went through something similar school wise and 2)have schedule and $ flexibility.

 

[cs24]

What advice would you guys give me? How difficult is it to maintain a relationship during medical school? My SOand I are extremely compatible, but it kills me to make him move to me while I pursue medical school and he will once again have to follow me to residency. Would it save us both a lot of time to end it before making the step of moving together?

It is not easy but doable, although you probably already knew that. The rest of your questions can't be answered by anyone but you and your SO. Good luck.

 

[AspiringERMD]

You lost someone that doesn't love you. She lost someone that loved her. Who really lost?

I know that someone else already acknowledged what a great quote this is, but I wanted to thank you for posting it. Mad props if that was original, and thanks for posting it even if it wasn't. It gives me a little comfort about some stuff from the past, and I sent it to a couple people close to me who I think would feel comforted by it too. Thank you 🙂

 

[doapplicant2015]

Block her. She's pond scum compared to you. You have more important things to worry about like NOT FAILING YOUR EXAM ON MONDAY.

#gostudy

This. These are the types of situations where, a few years from now you'll laugh at yourself for allowing someone like that to have had any emotional effect on you.

 

[Hemorrage]

Alright, drama filled update time. I've been feeling pretty good lately, ready to conquer the beast of medical school and move forward with my life. But last night she sends me a text (we haven't had any communication since she told me about him) saying that she's drunk and with this guy now. Keep in mind I also have a test on Monday and in no way want to be dealing with my cheating scumbag ex again. Her texting me made me absolutely livid at her and also the guy she was with, I tell her to put this jackass on the phone I want to have a few words with him (in hindsight definitely a mistake, I should have let it go, but I was furious and wanted to tell him off). She says he doesn't want to talk to me (obviously), and that's it.

Just absolutely crazy how you can think you know someone and be 100% wrong. This was someone I wanted to MARRY a month ago. I feel like I should be celebrating seeing what a bullet I dodged but at the same time I'm so pissed at myself for having such terrible judgment in the first place.

"... don't wait for the good woman. She doesn't exist. There are women who can make you feel more with their bodies and their souls but these are the exact women who will turn the knife into you right in front of the crowd. Of course, I expect this, but the knife still cuts. The female loves to play man against man, and if she is in a position to do it there is not one who will not resist. The male, for all his bravado and exploration, is the loyal one, the one who generally feels love. The female is skilled at betrayal. and torture and damnation. Never envy a man his lady. Behind it all lays a living hell." - Charles Bukowski


I went through something very similar to your situation and trust me it gets better. You'll think about it less as time goes on. Best advice i can give you is to block her on everything for 3-4 months. Focus on making new friends and most importantly, meeting new girls. You'll be surprised how much better you feel after you realize there are actually other more attractive and more compatible girls out there for you.

 

[Pacna]

Long time lurker that came across this thread and I thought I would make a post for some advice.

So I am currently in a long distance relationship and I will be matriculating at a school where neither my SO or I live. We have talked about whether we should move to one another or stay long distance. My main concern is that I know how time consuming my studies will be during medical school and I currently hope to match into a competitive residency. I feel that my SO doesn't realize how much time I will spend towards studying, and I don't know if he will be able to handle me not having a ton of time to do fun things. I am worried that I won't be able to please him and it is going to cause problems sooner or later.

What advice would you guys give me? How difficult is it to maintain a relationship during medical school? My SOand I are extremely compatible, but it kills me to make him move to me while I pursue medical school and he will once again have to follow me to residency. Would it save us both a lot of time to end it before making the step of moving together?

Thanks!

To check for understanding, you have to infer from what is not said. Someone can't communicate "Yes, I have no ****ing idea what I'm getting into with you but I think I do!" If he can't describe to you how he plans to cope with your absence, that's the biggest red flag possible in this scenario. Put it in real terms for him. Ask him how he would feel after 2 weeks of you leaving before he wakes up and coming home after he is in bed. Ask him how he'd feel about cleaning a home alone in times like that. What you're looking for in his answer isn't the right answer. Telling you that it'd feel like **** is okay. You just need to know that he understands the question.

 

[wiggitywack12]

"... don't wait for the good woman. She doesn't exist. There are women who can make you feel more with their bodies and their souls but these are the exact women who will turn the knife into you right in front of the crowd. Of course, I expect this, but the knife still cuts. The female loves to play man against man, and if she is in a position to do it there is not one who will not resist. The male, for all his bravado and exploration, is the loyal one, the one who generally feels love. The female is skilled at betrayal. and torture and damnation. Never envy a man his lady. Behind it all lays a living hell." - Charles Bukowski

Whoa. You do realize that I could reverse the male and female in this quote and read this to a room of jaded women who've been cheated on, lied to, abused physically and emotionally and I would get similar stories?

Bad people exist. Don't do yourself the disservice of making it a gender thing. It just was a time that opened your eyes to the type of person you don't want in your life and you can do a better job of screening out these types next time. No gender has autonomy of evil or good and thinking that way could really prevent you from a decent relationship (Gasp! They exist!!!!). Don't chain yourself to your past, because when you do it modulates your behavior in negative ways that you may not even be aware of and you'll come across as bizarre to other people and the good and decent ones will avoid you like the plague.

Surprised to see this kind of drivel on here...