I'm a measly 2nd assist (aka do the same 'responsibilities' as clinical rotations) as a nontrad premed. This surgeon is a complete pain in the you know where, pimps like no other then makes fun, degrades, openly says women should not be surgeons, treats all the med students like sh** (you know the drill) EXCEPT for his favorite pet project.
Well this big-headed attending is also a perfection controlling soccer coach to his 5-year-old son's team at a YMCA. Literally, he makes them run 4 miles at practice. They are FIVE. The best part? I volunteer there and help the sports coordinator maintain the soccer teams.
After a long day of cases I go up to the OR board and notice big-headed attending had an open belly case. Knowing that all med students run away from this attending, I knew someone had to assist him, but figured his pet project boy would automatically get the spot. Or so I thought. Apparently pet project boy had to leave early to go to class, so who gets the case? ME. Shocked and not knowing why pet project boy was not in the case, I sarcastically told the surgeon I figured he wanted his boy to assist (one benefit on not receiving a grade /eval). He turns around with his cocky little attitude and said, "well yeah, of course I want the cities most talented second assist on my team". That's like saying, "yeah, I want the best retractor B on my team" seriously what differentiates the superior ability to hold a retractor? I can hold my bladder for 24 hours. I stood there and stared at him as if I was represented all the med students he belittled every day for the past god knows how many years and decided that NO I was not going to allow him to bully me today. The great thing is, I knew his weak spot: his pursuance at being the best at SPORTS.
The convo:
ME (randomly): so did your son make the all-star team?
DR: ALL STAR TEAM? What are you talking about ? There is NO all star team!
ME: Well the YMCA strives to decrease tension and competitiveness between the leagues, but the coordinators do select an all-star team from each YMCA to represent their location to play the other YMCA all-star teams.
DR: Why havent I heard of this?!?
ME: I guess you never had a player nominated .....
.....SILENCE.......😕😕
ME: we usually only pick the kids we like, you know, like our PET PROJECTS
...............SILENCE................😱😱
(no throwing of instruments, no degrading words, no cursing, no slapping on the hands)
DR: visibly upset Well EVERY player on my team should be on the ALL STAR team, we have the BEST kids on my team. Better than any other kid out there and my son is the BEST player on the BEST team.
ME: look up and smile (i win) ..... by the way, I have your balls.
DR: All my balls?! I've been looking for them!
For the first time I've made jerk face the laughing stalk of the room
ME: Yeah, so be nice or I'll be sure to cut the sack give them to the less fortunate kids at the Y
Oh yeah, there is no such thing as an all-star team. I made it up to see him sweat at the though that he was inferior.
I feel like I won a small victory for all med students everywhere that face the worst ego surgeons and can't do anything about it. 😎🙄
Well this big-headed attending is also a perfection controlling soccer coach to his 5-year-old son's team at a YMCA. Literally, he makes them run 4 miles at practice. They are FIVE. The best part? I volunteer there and help the sports coordinator maintain the soccer teams.
After a long day of cases I go up to the OR board and notice big-headed attending had an open belly case. Knowing that all med students run away from this attending, I knew someone had to assist him, but figured his pet project boy would automatically get the spot. Or so I thought. Apparently pet project boy had to leave early to go to class, so who gets the case? ME. Shocked and not knowing why pet project boy was not in the case, I sarcastically told the surgeon I figured he wanted his boy to assist (one benefit on not receiving a grade /eval). He turns around with his cocky little attitude and said, "well yeah, of course I want the cities most talented second assist on my team". That's like saying, "yeah, I want the best retractor B on my team" seriously what differentiates the superior ability to hold a retractor? I can hold my bladder for 24 hours. I stood there and stared at him as if I was represented all the med students he belittled every day for the past god knows how many years and decided that NO I was not going to allow him to bully me today. The great thing is, I knew his weak spot: his pursuance at being the best at SPORTS.
The convo:
ME (randomly): so did your son make the all-star team?
DR: ALL STAR TEAM? What are you talking about ? There is NO all star team!
ME: Well the YMCA strives to decrease tension and competitiveness between the leagues, but the coordinators do select an all-star team from each YMCA to represent their location to play the other YMCA all-star teams.
DR: Why havent I heard of this?!?
ME: I guess you never had a player nominated .....
.....SILENCE.......😕😕
ME: we usually only pick the kids we like, you know, like our PET PROJECTS
...............SILENCE................😱😱
(no throwing of instruments, no degrading words, no cursing, no slapping on the hands)
DR: visibly upset Well EVERY player on my team should be on the ALL STAR team, we have the BEST kids on my team. Better than any other kid out there and my son is the BEST player on the BEST team.
ME: look up and smile (i win) ..... by the way, I have your balls.
DR: All my balls?! I've been looking for them!
For the first time I've made jerk face the laughing stalk of the room
ME: Yeah, so be nice or I'll be sure to cut the sack give them to the less fortunate kids at the Y
Oh yeah, there is no such thing as an all-star team. I made it up to see him sweat at the though that he was inferior.

I feel like I won a small victory for all med students everywhere that face the worst ego surgeons and can't do anything about it. 😎🙄