Describe Statements that have stood out to you/why?

[Hawkenthesky]

To any ADCOM members, Pre-Med Advisors, Doctors, Med students, etc. who have experience reading personal statements for medical school: think back to specific statements that have stood out to you, either for good or bad reasons. What about those letters made them stand out? What did the writer do that other applicants didn't? Was the applicant particularly unique (if so, how?), or did they simply write about their experiences in a really enthralling way? For bad letters, why where they exceptionally bad?

There are a million and one posts and articles on the internet about general tips for writing personal statements, but I'd like to hear specific anecdotes from the people who read them about what made certain statements they've read stand out! I'm asking this almost as much out of interest as for advice about how to write a good statement. Although of course general advice and valuable tips are appreciated and more than welcome!

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[OneTwoThreeFour]

Bad: Essays on med-tourism with focus on the tourism part. Essays saying they know the problems in the system and how they will fix them. Honestly had one essay with the line "I know nobody reads the essays but I want to talk about xyz". One person was a shoo-in until his/her essay had one of the above problems. All were rejections.

Good: Well written. Concise. Concrete examples. No lists.

 

[oldman]

personal statements that tell a story I enjoyed reading and gave me insight into the applicant. I have only worked for residency applicant cycle and those letters are a little more formal than med school applications.

i have read personal statements here to help.

 

[Catalystik]

advice about how to write a good statement.

Take care not to sprinkle your PS and Activity descriptions with grammar, punctuation, and/or spelling mistakes (NB: homophone errors aren't picked up by spell checkers), or an excessive number of -ly words.

 

[LizzyM]

With regard to letters:

Most memorable worst:
"I hope that someday, [the applicant]will be my son-in-law." Signed by a surgeon who got to know the applicant because he was dating his daughter.

Best:
Ivy League Coach who wrote of the applicant's good conduct and courtesy in hotels on road trips, and his ways of demonstrating good sportmanship and team leadership.

Can't come up with a best or worse PS... brain fried after reading them for ~20 years.

 

[Goro]

To any ADCOM members, Pre-Med Advisors, Doctors, Med students, etc. who have experience reading personal statements for medical school: think back to specific letters that have stood out to you, either for good or bad reasons. What about those letters made them stand out? What did the writer do that other applicants didn't? Was the applicant particularly unique (if so, how?), or did they simply write about their experiences in a really enthralling way? For bad letters, why where they exceptionally bad?

There are a million and one posts and articles on the internet about general tips for writing personal statements, but I'd like to hear specific anecdotes from the people who read them about what made certain statements they've read stand out! I'm asking this almost as much out of interest as for advice about how to write a good statement. Although of course general advice and valuable tips are appreciated and more than welcome!

The best ones tell a story about the road travelled to Medicine.

The worst ones start out "The patient was brought in, terrified", or "I was 6 years old and scared".

Other bad ones are research heavy, which makes us think, "Why don't you just go to grad school?"

 

[timephone]

I'm just an applicant so I don't know what my opinion is worth, but I saw someone suggest feeding your PS through a "word cloud" generator online. This gives you a bird's eye view of the themes you're conveying through repeated vocabulary. If "I", "Me", or "Mine" are the biggest words, then you probably need to change some things!

 

[Prometheus123]

I'm bookmarking this thread for future reference. I've currently got about twice as much material as I need for the PS, but I still need to edit it down and organize it into a coherent essay, and I think these observations will help me (and others) do that. Thanks everybody.

 

[FlavivirusProtease]

Just from reading a bunch of apps on SDN (on this account and the one I used before I forgot its password). Ones that do not stand out to me are the ones about how profound of an effect your hospice patient passing had on you. Literally everyone writes about that.

Edit: Some of them are really well written and thoughtful, but I've read like 15 essays in the last month, and like 9 of them were about hospice patients passing. Might be my small sample size though.

 

[Prometheus123]

In case this benefits anyone else, here's my paraphrasing of a theme that people brought up a lot in reaction to my initial attempts last cycle: this isn't a creative writing short story, so drop the excessive adjectives and adverbs and the vivid sensory language; just tell us, in plain English, why medicine and why you.

Please correct me or clarify if I've gotten any of this wrong.

 

[gyngyn]

Take care not to sprinkle your PS and Activity descriptions with grammar, punctuation, and/or spelling mistakes (NB: homophone errors aren't picked up by spell checkers), or an excessive number of -ly words.

I think adverbs should be dramatically restricted!

 

[Prometheus123]

I think adverbs should be dramatically restricted!

I see what you did there.

 

[Catalystik]

I see what you did there.

Very adroit of you!

 

[Prometheus123]

Very adroit of you!

Thanks, I guess I'm not just really, really, really ridiculously good looking.

 

[TelemarketingEnigma]

Most memorable worst:
"I hope that someday, [the applicant]will be my son-in-law." Signed by a surgeon who got to know the applicant because he was dating his daughter.

We're interviewing candidates for a position at my work, and one of them had a reference who said something along the lines of "this candidate is the kind of girl you would want your son to bring home." The person giving the recommendation obviously meant it as a compliment to her character so I wouldn't count it against the candidate, but it left a poor taste in some of our mouths - I would hope that my letter writers spoke to more than my suitability as marriage material.

 

[Prometheus123]

Here's a little inspiration to help anyone who's writing right now:

 

[LizzyM]

In case this benefits anyone else, here's my paraphrasing of a theme that people brought up a lot in reaction to my initial attempts last cycle: this isn't a creative writing short story, so drop the excessive adjectives and adverbs and the vivid sensory language; just tell us, in plain English, why medicine and why you.

Please correct me or clarify if I've gotten any of this wrong.

and for Pete's sake (I don't know Pete but my grandmother used to say this) don't use the word paradigm unless there is no alternative in your armamentarium (and don't use armamentarium, either).

 

[thegrind33]

This thread is money totally using all the advice above to edit my essays.

 

[Prometheus123]

and for Pete's sake (I don't know Pete but my grandmother used to say this) don't use the word paradigm unless there is no alternative in your armamentarium (and don't use armamentarium, either).

Thanks for this reminder.

 

[Prometheus123]

Those of us still grieving about our lack of acceptances from last cycle (so far) may prefer this song about resilience, perseverance, struggling to overcome adversity, and using our pain to drive ourselves forward, transforming it into a benefit:

 

[Hawkenthesky]

Now that the 2019 apps have been open for a bit and we are all in the throes of crafting our personal statements, I’m bumping this thread!!