I officially feel like an idiot!

[imgtointern]

Hi, I’m posting after a long time. I just got my board results as some of you also did, I’m sure. And I officially feel like I am genuinely stupid. I passed the cp exam but failed ap, by just 5 points! Which comes out to be about 0.5% or something. Boy do I feel stupid!

If anyone of you ever read my earlier posts, you know I struggled to get into residency. But I finally did. I was a good resident, got into 2 competitive fellowships, currently doing the first one, and I even got a decent score in my last rise exam. I was in the 50th percentile or above for all the ap topics. Cp was the one I was worried about! So how does this happen?!?!?!?

I think I’m just venting but I’m seriously shocked and disappointed. I was always a good student and got into MED school after ranking very high in a competitive entrance exam, the kind where they take points off for wrong answers. But ever since step 1, my confidence in my exam taking abilities has waned. I did well in all the other steps but every now and then, something comes up, like this dang ap exam that chips away at my confidence a little more.

Should I even bother to appeal? Does such a thing even exits? I realize that I’m in the bottom 10-15% of people in my field and that hurts! Boy does it hurt.

Congrats to all those who passed. But I just don’t know anymore.

I was hoping to post here about to pass the ap/cp board exams etc. Now I just want to cry!

---

Members don't see this ad.

 

[KeratinPearls]

Hi, I’m posting after a long time. I just got my board results as some of you also did, I’m sure. And I officially feel like I am genuinely stupid. I passed the cp exam but failed ap, by just 5 points! Which comes out to be about 0.5% or something. Boy do I feel stupid!

If anyone of you ever read my earlier posts, you know I struggled to get into residency. But I finally did. I was a good resident, got into 2 competitive fellowships, currently doing the first one, and I even got a decent score in my last rise exam. I was in the 50th percentile or above for all the ap topics. Cp was the one I was worried about! So how does this happen?!?!?!?

I think I’m just venting but I’m seriously shocked and disappointed. I was always a good student and got into MED school after ranking very high in a competitive entrance exam, the kind where they take points off for wrong answers. But ever since step 1, my confidence in my exam taking abilities has waned. I did well in all the other steps but every now and then, something comes up, like this dang ap exam that chips away at my confidence a little more.

Should I even bother to appeal? Does such a thing even exits? I realize that I’m in the bottom 10-15% of people in my field and that hurts! Boy does it hurt.

Congrats to all those who passed. But I just don’t know anymore.

I was hoping to post here about to pass the ap/cp board exams etc. Now I just want to cry!

Just chillax. Study and pass the next time you take it. Do questions. These board exams don’t really test intelligence at all. Just your ability to recall factoids.

Clear your mind of your negative thoughts. It doesn’t help you at all. Always think YOU have what it takes to accomplish anything. It’s called mental strength/power.

 

[caffeinegirl]

If it makes you feel any better, several of my classmates in a top tier program failed AP - no rhyme or reason to it. They passed on the second try and it was no big deal. Just take it again - and it's water under the bridge.

 

[LADoc00]

Retake and who cares, I read the title and assumed this thread was something serious like the local police found a dead hooker in your trunk or you got caught by your residency program stealing ketamine.

This is the forum equivalent of my wife calling me and telling me its a "life and death emergency" to reveal our dog swallowed a sock again.

 

[imgtointern]

You guys make me feel better. No dead hooker in the trunk, I checked.

I’m just very embarrassed because I broke a multiple year streak for my residency program. I hope my current fellowship program doesn’t think less of me.

Yes I should be grateful and positive. I am certainly grateful that I don’t have to retake cp, that would be pure torture! I just want all this failing business to get behind me!

Thank you all. I do feel better after reading your posts.

 

[LADoc00]

You guys make me feel better. No dead hooker in the trunk, I checked.

I’m just very embarrassed because I broke a multiple year streak for my residency program. I hope my current fellowship program doesn’t think less of me.

Yes I should be grateful and positive. I am certainly grateful that I don’t have to retake cp, that would be pure torture! I just want all this failing business to get behind me!

Thank you all. I do feel better after reading your posts.

Just go study, retake, pass and join the miserable job market with the rest of us. Then you can sit on my weekly conference calls where everyone just bitches about life, low pay, crappy work conditions and declining respect from hospital admin.

It's really a dream existence.

 

[KeratinPearls]

You guys make me feel better. No dead hooker in the trunk, I checked.

I’m just very embarrassed because I broke a multiple year streak for my residency program. I hope my current fellowship program doesn’t think less of me.

Yes I should be grateful and positive. I am certainly grateful that I don’t have to retake cp, that would be pure torture! I just want all this failing business to get behind me!

Thank you all. I do feel better after reading your posts.

Yup when you have time (after passing AP board) read “Growth Mindset” by Carol Dweck. Read “13 Things Mentally Strong People Dont Do” by Amy Morin.

 

[imgtointern]

Yup when you have time (after passing AP board) read “Growth Mindset” by Carol Dweck. Read “13 Things Mentally Strong People Dont Do” by Amy Morin.

Thank you. I will definitely look into these.

 

[imgtointern]

Just go study, retake, pass and join the miserable job market with the rest of us. Then you can sit on my weekly conference calls where everyone just bitches about life, low pay, crappy work conditions and declining respect from hospital admin.

It's really a dream existence.

Wow! You fill me with such hope!

But seriously in terms of compensation, I told my family to expect 150k as starting to be safe. Given what my salary is now, it will still be around 3x more. But I am doing two good fellowships so what is realistic to start with? And what is realistic to expect after 3-5 years?

 

[RE-Tired]

Agree with previous posts. It is not that big a deal. Just a pain for you. Chill. I worked with a colleague junior to me who failed AP. This person was one of the sharpest I have know in AP and now is a professor at a major institution. Hope it makes you feel better.
I agree with Kertinpearls "Do some questions" then do some more questions and then finally do even more questions.

 

[Iceman24]

Hi, I’m posting after a long time. I just got my board results as some of you also did, I’m sure. And I officially feel like I am genuinely stupid. I passed the cp exam but failed ap, by just 5 points! Which comes out to be about 0.5% or something. Boy do I feel stupid!

If anyone of you ever read my earlier posts, you know I struggled to get into residency. But I finally did. I was a good resident, got into 2 competitive fellowships, currently doing the first one, and I even got a decent score in my last rise exam. I was in the 50th percentile or above for all the ap topics. Cp was the one I was worried about! So how does this happen?!?!?!?

I think I’m just venting but I’m seriously shocked and disappointed. I was always a good student and got into MED school after ranking very high in a competitive entrance exam, the kind where they take points off for wrong answers. But ever since step 1, my confidence in my exam taking abilities has waned. I did well in all the other steps but every now and then, something comes up, like this dang ap exam that chips away at my confidence a little more.

Should I even bother to appeal? Does such a thing even exits? I realize that I’m in the bottom 10-15% of people in my field and that hurts! Boy does it hurt.

Congrats to all those who passed. But I just don’t know anymore.

I was hoping to post here about to pass the ap/cp board exams etc. Now I just want to cry!

I'm glad you mentioned RISE.
I was in 40th percentile my 3rd year and kept studying hard for boards during my 4th year. Guess what I got on the 4th year RISE - 15th percentile!
The score arrived just few weeks before the actual board, so I just went ahead and sat for the test (2018). I passed both AP and CP. Still have no idea what was that, probably RISE nowadays has poor correlation with the real boards, especially AP...

 

[TrojanRaggy]

Hi, I’m posting after a long time. I just got my board results as some of you also did, I’m sure. And I officially feel like I am genuinely stupid. I passed the cp exam but failed ap, by just 5 points! Which comes out to be about 0.5% or something. Boy do I feel stupid!

If anyone of you ever read my earlier posts, you know I struggled to get into residency. But I finally did. I was a good resident, got into 2 competitive fellowships, currently doing the first one, and I even got a decent score in my last rise exam. I was in the 50th percentile or above for all the ap topics. Cp was the one I was worried about! So how does this happen?!?!?!?

I think I’m just venting but I’m seriously shocked and disappointed. I was always a good student and got into MED school after ranking very high in a competitive entrance exam, the kind where they take points off for wrong answers. But ever since step 1, my confidence in my exam taking abilities has waned. I did well in all the other steps but every now and then, something comes up, like this dang ap exam that chips away at my confidence a little more.

Should I even bother to appeal? Does such a thing even exits? I realize that I’m in the bottom 10-15% of people in my field and that hurts! Boy does it hurt.

Congrats to all those who passed. But I just don’t know anymore.

I was hoping to post here about to pass the ap/cp board exams etc. Now I just want to cry!

You are not an idiot. The system of using standardized tests (originally designed to select low stakes workers) in medicine and science is idiotic. Practice of pathology has nothing to do with the ability to solve MCQs. Just retake it and pass. Good luck!

On a lighter note, you can just claim that you passed. You will have the support of at least 70 million people

 

[chooks]

Thank you. I will definitely look into these.

FYI - it looks like “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do” by Amy Morin has a free kindle edition if you are prime member.

 

[octopusprime]

You guys make me feel better. No dead hooker in the trunk, I checked.

I’m just very embarrassed because I broke a multiple year streak for my residency program. I hope my current fellowship program doesn’t think less of me.

Yes I should be grateful and positive. I am certainly grateful that I don’t have to retake cp, that would be pure torture! I just want all this failing business to get behind me!

Thank you all. I do feel better after reading your posts.

Residency is not unlike other periods of your education...based on snippets of academic achievement or individual courses or exams, students/residents can be pigeon holed as "good" or "bad", especially within academic towers. Every program has 'golden children', and every program has 'misfits'; ideally you're somewhere in between, but regardless, it has no bearing on future success; if anything a chip on your shoulder can often be a good thing.

 

[imgtointern]

Agree with previous posts. It is not that big a deal. Just a pain for you. Chill. I worked with a colleague junior to me who failed AP. This person was one of the sharpest I have know in AP and now is a professor at a major institution. Hope it makes you feel better.
I agree with Kertinpearls "Do some questions" then do some more questions and then finally do even more questions.

That makes me feel better. Not that you colleague failed, but that there are others like me. So far I don't know anyone else who failed personally so kinda feeling alone at sea. I have no way of knowing if I failed by a little or a lot or by a standard amount.

 

[imgtointern]

I'm glad you mentioned RISE.
I was in 40th percentile my 3rd year and kept studying hard for boards during my 4th year. Guess what I got on the 4th year RISE - 15th percentile!
The score arrived just few weeks before the actual board, so I just went ahead and sat for the test (2018). I passed both AP and CP. Still have no idea what was that, probably RISE nowadays has poor correlation with the real boards, especially AP...

My overall percentile was not great, 30 or something but that was because of CP. AP was in the 50s and above. But you are right, it's not an absolute correlation. Also, just a few right or wrong answers can change your percentile by a lot. I showed my score to a senior who is now a faculty because I was worried and she just barely glanced at it and gave it back and said "Oh you are fine". Guess what?.....

 

[imgtointern]

You are not an idiot. The system of using standardized tests (originally designed to select low stakes workers) in medicine and science is idiotic. Practice of pathology has nothing to do with the ability to solve MCQs. Just retake it and pass. Good luck!

On a lighter note, you can just claim that you passed. You will have the support of at least 70 million people

Thank you. I agree. I should just fake it (lie) till I make it. But who are the 70 million people?

 

[imgtointern]

FYI - it looks like “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do” by Amy Morin has a free kindle edition if you are prime member.

I will look it up.

 

[imgtointern]

Residency is not unlike other periods of your education...based on snippets of academic achievement or individual courses or exams, students/residents can be pigeon holed as "good" or "bad", especially within academic towers. Every program has 'golden children', and every program has 'misfits'; ideally you're somewhere in between, but regardless, it has no bearing on future success; if anything a chip on your shoulder can often be a good thing.

Yes, in-between, under the radar is the best! I think I have been at all three points at different times during residency and before for sure.

 

[TrojanRaggy]

Thank you. I agree. I should just fake it (lie) till I make it. But who are the 70 million people?

I was referring to Trump...

 

[imgtointern]

I was referring to Trump...

Lol! I totally missed that.

 

[Iceman24]

My overall percentile was not great, 30 or something but that was because of CP. AP was in the 50s and above. But you are right, it's not an absolute correlation. Also, just a few right or wrong answers can change your percentile by a lot. I showed my score to a senior who is now a faculty because I was worried and she just barely glanced at it and gave it back and said "Oh you are fine". Guess what?.....

This is strange. The fact that you were in 50th percentile for AP also means that you are a good test taker in general.
Did you ever have any problems with other MCQ tests?

 

[imgtointern]

This is strange. The fact that you were in 50th percentile for AP also means that you are a good test taker in general.
Did you ever have any problems with other MCQ tests?

Not really. I did have trouble with step 1 but I was going through personal stuff and I let it get to me and took the exam at a bad time. After I got over it, I was fine. I took the GRE for grad school and did fine. So I don’t think so. Even the med school entrance exam in my country was mcq style and I ranked high.

I think maybe I focused a lot on cp. I know I changed some answers in ap at the last minute and that did me in. Sigh how I regret those.

 

[imgtointern]

Hi all, I passed my AP exam. Thank you all for your encouragement. You all were right, in the end it wasn’t a big deal, just that my ego was bruised. But I am very relieved now and happy to be able to move on!

 

[coroner]

 

[AZpath]

Congrats. We knew you would make it. How fellowship going?

 

[imgtointern]

Congrats. We knew you would make it. How fellowship going?

Thank you! Fellowship is going well, thanks for asking. Almost done with the first one and on to the second one on July 1st. My servitude continues!

 

[LADoc00]

way to go. now you have decades to be miserable in the wonderful world of pathology.

Go stock your liquor cabinet with your first paycheck to help dull some of the pain.

 

[imgtointern]

View attachment 339526
way to go. now you have decades to be miserable in the wonderful world of pathology.

Go stock your liquor cabinet with your first paycheck to help dull some of the pain.

🤯