Lonely profession?

[Wiscobadger13]

So I've been on the fence between dentistry for awhile. One of the major concerns I have is if being a solo practioner is a lonely career. My perception of the field is that, once you open up your own practice, its basically just you, a receptionist, hygienist, and an assistant or two. After you've been in practice for awhile, doesn't this work setting just become routine?

In other careers you work with many more people, and many of them are your peers. I just feel like you would have no one like you to work with for the next 30+ years of your life. I'm looking for some advice from any long term practicing dentists. Thanks.

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[Dgeorg6]

You will get a lot of patient interaction as well. Your with someone almost every minute of the day while working, whether it's assistant, hygienist, any other staff, or your patients. Doesn't seem lonely to me.

 

[gryffindor]

Yes, it it lonely. You have to make an effort to stay social with your peers because the staff are not your peers no matter how fun and awesome they are. You are the boss and there is a line.

I get so tired of talking to patients and instructing staff that at the end of the day, I want to come home to silence and not talk to anyone.

 

[psiyung]

As Grif mentioned, dentistry is a lonely profession. Being a very social person myself, this is one aspect of dentistry I did not anticipate. Now this is coming from a single guy who clubbed and partied a lot when he was younger, but its difficult to make a transition when the only arena most of us knew was being surrounded by many other people (high school, college, college job, dental school, etc). It might be different for those who are married, but here are a few tips: dont make friends with your assistants. You are their boss. I made that mistake early in my career and ended up with a spoiled assistant (who I later got fired).

 

[Cold Front]

As Grif mentioned, dentistry is a lonely profession. Being a very social person myself, this is one aspect of dentistry I did not anticipate. Now this is coming from a single guy who clubbed and partied a lot when he was younger, but its difficult to make a transition when the only arena most of us knew was being surrounded by many other people (high school, college, college job, dental school, etc). It might be different for those who are married, but here are a few tips: dont make friends with your assistants. You are their boss. I made that mistake early in my career and ended up with a spoiled assistant (who I later got fired).

I agree.

I went back to a community I grew up in before attending school, so my friends and family are my local social joints. As a single man too, I close my office for a long weekend every 6-8 weeks for out of town vacations... doing CE's with old classmates, vegas trips, cruises, etc. It definitely helps on this physically and mentally demanding profession.

 

[yappy]

Do you feel your body breaking down faster than your social peers who are not in dentistry? Would you say that dentistry is harder physically than other surgical based medical careers? How long do you plan to practice.

Thanks.

I agree.

I went back to a community I grew up in before attending school, so my friends and family are my local social joints. As a single man too, I close my office for a long weekend every 6-8 weeks for out of town vacations... doing CE's with old classmates, vegas trips, cruises, etc. It definitely helps on this physically and mentally demanding profession.

 

[bigbadaboom]

usually starts with the lower back or the neck/shoulder
then the eyes give out
carpel tunnel is a problem too
someone told me 1/3 dentists have experienced some disability at some point in their career.

i have hurt my back and out of commission for a week. count me in as one of the 1/3 dentists.

 

[yappy]

Not to derail the OP's thread but is it uncommon of for an OS or general dentist to work till 65-70? What is the mean age.

usually starts with the lower back or the neck/shoulder
then the eyes give out
carpel tunnel is a problem too
someone told me 1/3 dentists have experienced some disability at some point in their career.

i have hurt my back and out of commission for a week. count me in as one of the 1/3 dentists.

 

[bigbadaboom]

Not to derail the OP's thread but is it uncommon of for an OS or general dentist to work till 65-70? What is the mean age.

the mean age for retirement? not sure i say that's about the right number for a GP.
many will claim disability and quit doing dentistry years before their desired retirement age.

I know a 70 yr old dentist who sold his practice and now works for a large office to pay for his bills... not doing it for fun, but he does it so he can pay his 17 yr old stepdaughter's new convertible Mustang.

also heard about a dentist who saved aggressively and quit doing dentistry completely after he's saved up a million dollars, took him 20 yrs or so. He lived well below his means and he retired to a small city, taking the rest of his retirement life easy, fishing everyday.

 

[yappy]

Yeah, I was talking about retirement. That's unfortunate for those who invested so much (time & money) into becoming a dentist then had to retire before they were ready.

LOL - I cannot imagine being 70 and working for a 17 year olds convertible.

My personal retirement goals would be owning my home, 2 duplexes, 4 million between 401k+IRA, and no debts.

EDIT: rereading my retirement goals makes me seem kinda ridiculous lol.

the mean age for retirement? not sure i say that's about the right number for a GP.
many will claim disability and quit doing dentistry years before their desired retirement age.

I know a 70 yr old dentist who sold his practice and now works for a large office to pay for his bills... not doing it for fun, but he does it so he can pay his 17 yr old stepdaughter's new convertible Mustang.

also heard about a dentist who saved aggressively and quit doing dentistry completely after he's saved up a million dollars, took him 20 yrs or so. He lived well below his means and he retired to a small city, taking the rest of his retirement life easy, fishing everyday.

 

[djeffreyt]

At work when I am not working on patients, I pretty much spend most of my time either on the phone or texting with friends or online talking with friends. I believe in keeping that distance with assistants and front staff. I talk with them and joke around, but we aren't friends. I also play a lot of games on my phone with friends.

I'm single so when I go home I'm lucky that I live in an area of town where all my friends live as well. Half the nights I get together with one or more of them.

If I didn't have that I guess I'd be a lot lonelier. I definitely have friends who tell me they work in areas where they don't have a lot of friends and don't meet a lot of people and they are lonely, but the downside of friends and living in a place where I can go out...I waste too much money.

 

[mike3kgt]

At work when I am not working on patients, I pretty much spend most of my time either on the phone or texting with friends or online talking with friends.

Why do you think there are so many dentists on SDN or dentaltown? This is a great way for us to share our good/bad/ugly days .

Meeting are great too, societies are good as well but sometimes it's even better if you have a good solid core of friends who are not dentists to enjoy life with. Be careful here though because your non-medical/non-dental friends may want to do lots of things that may not be conducive to dental career health... like skydiving or shark-diving .

Stay active, teach 1/2 day a week, go to study clubs, be proactive in your career and it will NEVER get boring. If you are bored after a year of two, go back to school and specialize. That's what I did... tough decision but loved every minute of it.

 

[Daurang]

It is lonely even though you chit chat with patients every day. However for us men it's much easier cause we can simply go out and pickup any trophy wife or get pickup by a waitress. For female it's so much harder. I personally know four single female dentists who are very very lonely.

 

[Sublimazing]

It is lonely even though you chit chat with patients every day. However for us men it's much easier cause we can simply go out and pickup any trophy wife or get pickup by a waitress. For female it's so much harder. I personally know four single female dentists who are very very lonely.

What restaurants are you eating at?

 

[Firm]

It is lonely even though you chit chat with patients every day. However for us men it's much easier cause we can simply go out and pickup any trophy wife or get pickup by a waitress. For female it's so much harder. I personally know four single female dentists who are very very lonely.

PM me there #'s.

 

[Shnurek]

I personally know four single female dentists who are very very lonely.

Because they were so career oriented that they had no time for men And now they won't "date down" aka they might only want to go out with MDs, DOs, JDs, PhDs or business guys with a lot of $$$. So serves them right.

 

[bigbadaboom]

What restaurants are you eating at?

Hooters

 

[Bereno]

So, how much loneliness is due to one's job, compared to one's character? I know a few dentists who hang out together, play tennis together, take CE together, hell, they even take vacations together. They each also have family trips, hobbies of their own, etc. On the flip side, I also know a dentist who is all work and no play, and recently divorced; seems kinda lonely to me. The only information I can gather is that it is what you make of it. Yes, you might not interact with your close friends as work, but I don't see why it prevents you from being social afterwards. If you have a lonely job, does that make your life lonely as well? Possibly... I can't help but assume that could be more of a personality hurtle to me. All this said, I am no dentist yet, and have not experienced this first hand; just speculating

 

[Sublimazing]

So, how much loneliness is due to one's job, compared to one's character? I know a few dentists who hang out together, play tennis together, take CE together, hell, they even take vacations together. They each also have family trips, hobbies of their own, etc. On the flip side, I also know a dentist who is all work and no play, and recently divorced; seems kinda lonely to me. The only information I can gather is that it is what you make of it. Yes, you might not interact with your close friends as work, but I don't see why it prevents you from being social afterwards. If you have a lonely job, does that make your life lonely as well? Possibly... I can't help but assume that could be more of a personality hurtle to me. All this said, I am no dentist yet, and have not experienced this first hand; just speculating

From my small experience a lot of single operator set ups can lend themselves to a "lonely" work environment...but it's more dependent on the person.

I'm a in a "smaller" city right now (pop 300k) but at the last dental society meeting three women were complaining that they're lonely or bored at work. All unmarried, and single operator setups.

It's nice to have people to talk shop with, and they're right, it cannot be your staff...but just join your local dental society and be out going...happiness is almost always an option, people just don't choose it

 

[Cold Front]

Do you feel your body breaking down faster than your social peers who are not in dentistry? Would you say that dentistry is harder physically than other surgical based medical careers? How long do you plan to practice.

Thanks.

I don't know how physically demanding other medical careers are, but I work about 40hrs a week, see about 100 patients/week, and look forward to my weekends more and more these days due to my business growing. This is not to say I don't like what I do, I love it, but the workload itself is a lot. I intend to practice as long as I can physically practice dentistry, and it continues to be as fun and enjoyable enough to me. If I ever get bored or have physical limitations, then I might do just a management type of work at the office (which is semi-retirement itself).

 

[toothdr5]

So I've been on the fence between dentistry for awhile. One of the major concerns I have is if being a solo practioner is a lonely career. My perception of the field is that, once you open up your own practice, its basically just you, a receptionist, hygienist, and an assistant or two. After you've been in practice for awhile, doesn't this work setting just become routine?

In other careers you work with many more people, and many of them are your peers. I just feel like you would have no one like you to work with for the next 30+ years of your life. I'm looking for some advice from any long term practicing dentists. Thanks.

Hello Wiscobadger13,

I agree that it is a lonely career. You are not part of a team in the same way as someone working for a large firm doing an office job. I guess both have advantages and disadvantages.

The disadvantage to our situ is the loneliness factor.

I think it can be due to several reason why someone feels lonely. Certain circumstances in life can create such situations and even the most outgoing people can find themselves alone.
And yes it is important to take steps towards bettering one's circumstances; and asking others on this forum is such a step.

I personally would suggest take a course like a language course, or join a gym and take classes so you are more likely to talk to someone. Slowly you will meet people. Also doing a different activity at the end of the day even if it involves the brain is actually revitalising, I 100% recommend it.

 

[konarocky]

As others have already said, stay engaged in your profession: dentaltown, SDN, CE courses, teach part-time, study clubs, etc.

 

[Sublimazing]

I think the take home message is that dentistry can foster an isolated work environment from 9-5 if you are a single operator in your own clinic, but I would argue that there is ample opportunity outside of clinic to socialize with colleagues, perhaps more so than other professions (prof societies, CE, study clubs, confs, etc)

And dentistry offers the advantage of meeting plenty of interesting people and situations at work to stave off boredom and loneliness. It also offers the disposable income and ease of practice to do the leisure and hobby activities you may have or wish to try.

And finally, I think that some of the advice given about not befriending your staff is absolutely crucial. I'm only a resident and I have already witnessed first hand the disastrous (no joke) problems that this can bring.

 

[DentinBond]

Do you feel your body breaking down faster than your social peers who are not in dentistry? Would you say that dentistry is harder physically than other surgical based medical careers? How long do you plan to practice.

Thanks.

How long? Doesn't matter who is President- the idiots in Congress (both parties) are going to pass increasingly burdensome and insane tax laws to the point where the question "How long do you plan to practice?" is moot. Long retirements are a thing of the past.

But everything else about dentistry is going great (technology, demand, the things we can do for patients, our independence from the anonymous corporate model, etc.), so what the heck?

What helps more than anything though is the use of a surgical operating microscope. Seriously. In my case it's been one year since I adopted this innovation, and it's the very best single item I've ever purchased for the practice. Posture, eye strain, stress, guessing what we're really seeing- all improved by this remarkable device. Probably added ten years to my career (if I need it to) already.

And to answer your original question about lonely- nah. There are ways to fight that. After too many years I realized that instead of going to CE and just seeing who I run into, it's better to email all my peeps and stir up some interest. That way, a number of us are at every worthwhile course. And we visit each other's practices, bounce ideas around. This is rare, it's hard to find the time, but we do it. Also I'm in a CE group and participate in running it. And I teach. In my old residency, and these days just a few times a semester, but it for a time it was weekly, for an afternoon. Nothing keeps your enthusiasm up like teaching, not to mention collecting younger dentist friends. ;} And the learning goes both ways- they always start out believing I know more, or some such rot, since I'm older, and then we end up being amazed by how much I learn from the newer dentist. Mostly because I feed them ideas, then they run with them and re-invent them and come up with something even better.

So there's no reason for dentistry to be lonely.

 

[yappy]

Thanks for your post. It's not that I want to retire by X age. I really love working - no matter what my job has been. However, I just wanted to know if it was common to be able to work to 70+ if you wanted to. Sounds like microscopy has made things a little better for the operator.

Thanks.

 

[Dr. Dai Phan]

Hello all,

I don't find my job to be lonely at all. I interact with every single patient by conversing while I am doing pros and seeing each patient is like having a friend coming over for a visit. Since my work is in high demand by patients, they are always eager to see me and I am eager to see them so I can deliver the prostheses. And the smile on their faces is priceless! I am active on SDN and between patients, I try to see what's going on here and post a few if I can. I am also active in providing CE courses in local/national arena and meeting new friends at different places is a "vacation" in itself. I believe you can your practice the way you want it to be. You can be talkative, funny, silly and make the visit interesting or don't say a single word and sulk in your own world. DP

 

[Firm]

The internet (facebook, forums, etc.) keep you from being lonely. I use to work for a chain in the middle of no where. I worked 3 days there every other week and they flew me in. I was so bored, then I discovered facebook and forums on my phone. I was on it constantly between patients. The world is getting so much smaller with technology.

 

[arkenstone]

This issues has come up for me recently. The way my first week of shadowing happened to turn out, I observed a [successful] solo practitioner on a Tuesday and OMFS residents at Vanderbilt on a Thursday.

Tuesday: without being prompted, the GP brought up how isolating the field can be. He tries to keep an online consult group going, jogging groups, goes on vacations with other dentists stay involved in the state dental association, etc. -- but he still says it's isolating, especially if it's a personal tendency of yours. You have to be a leader to your staff, and you can rarely just 'let loose' with patients. Honestly, that day left me a bit apprehensive because of this topic.

Thursday: totally different situation (of course). Besides being in a hospital where other people are usually the managers and you can actually be friends with the assistants/nurses/etc., you're also consulting with other doctors constantly. You couldn't be lonely if you wanted to.

Honestly, just this issue alone has me glancing through my old pre-med notes. An overreaction, perhaps, but the seed of concern is real.

 

[b-rad12]

This issues has come up for me recently. The way my first week of shadowing happened to turn out, I observed a [successful] solo practitioner on a Tuesday and OMFS residents at Vanderbilt on a Thursday.

Tuesday: without being prompted, the GP brought up how isolating the field can be. He tries to keep an online consult group going, jogging groups, goes on vacations with other dentists stay involved in the state dental association, etc. -- but he still says it's isolating, especially if it's a personal tendency of yours. You have to be a leader to your staff, and you can rarely just 'let loose' with patients. Honestly, that day left me a bit apprehensive because of this topic.

Thursday: totally different situation (of course). Besides being in a hospital where other people are usually the managers and you can actually be friends with the assistants/nurses/etc., you're also consulting with other doctors constantly. You couldn't be lonely if you wanted to.

Honestly, just this issue alone has me glancing through my old pre-med notes. An overreaction, perhaps, but the seed of concern is real.

It sounds like you like the hospital atmosphere.. There are dentists in the hospital.