Thank you everyone for taking the time to write these responses. I really appreciate it.
I have heard that a lot of step 2 material is actually from step 1, so the best prep for step 2 is to still try to really be prepared for step 1. Do you agree with this? I'm just worried because it does seem like each "phase" matters. For example, in order 2 do well on step 2, do well on step 1 (it will be p/f, but i'm guessing you'd have an idea of where you are based on practice exam scores). In order to do well on step 1, do the best you can in preclinical. I'm worried that me already being "average" feels like I'm already behind so many of my peers, and it's just going to get harder to catch up because there is just so much to know. I use Anking and unsuspend based on in house exam material and then add extra cards in a separate deck just for class. I try to unsuspend some based on 3rd party resources of material that in house exams doesn't cover, but I only get to this sometimes, but maybe I could try to cover this more as I go along? I know this probably sounds neurotic and I appreciate your comments that "just average" isn't something to be ashamed of. I think it's more coming from a place of fear/ imposter syndrome that I'm already behind so many of my peers because it seems like it comes so much easier for other people, and even if I try extra hard I still am stuck in the same place. Maybe other people just want to give off the perception that they're not trying as hard when they really are, I'm not sure though.
edit: TLDR; I want to be a great/ top med student so i can be a great doctor and also not close any doors for specialities or top residency programs, and I feel overwhelmed by how much there is and that I'm already behind, and worrying I will never be able to catch up and be a top student.