kinetic

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k's mom

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llort said:
really, do any males post on this crying about their women in med school?
Do you mean WIVES and girlfriends?
I've never "cried" about my husband in med school here (although I do cry because of poor grammar and spelling! :rolleyes: ), nor do I read the same whiny posts, but there have been more than a few husbands/boyfriends seeking real support.
 

1Path

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llort said:
really, do any males post on this crying about their women in med school?
I actually thought this was the Wife of MEDICAL STUDENT/ RESIDENT SAHM posse thread! :laugh:
 

johndoe2k5

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My situation is one of the rare cases where my wife is the resident doctor and I'm in no way involved in the medical field. I never find anyone else who is in my situation & most organizations for spouses of residents are all women.
I think it's worse for someone in my situation than when it's reversed. My wife & I got married right before the residency started & prior to that we dated 10 years. And thus far I don't see the difference between her medical school & her residency in terms of the amount of time she has or in the way she treats me. The rest remains to be seen. All of her co-workers significant others are in some way involved in the medical profession & whenever we all get together I feel awkward & no one does anything to make me feel comfortable. All they talk about is medical crap & it is boring as hell! I'll bet most if not all of them don't even have sex anymore. I often look at my ding dong & wonder if I'll ever get to use it again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:(
 

toft32

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Don't worry - there are male spouses of medical women out there. My wife and I got married the summer before medical school started and we've just matched (but don't know where yet). Maybe you'd have more luck at the Medical Spouse Network. There's some good stuff there too, but it is mostly women.

Hey - there are some of us out here!
 

Sweenracer

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I hear ya,
My wife is about to start her residency in June. We have been married three years. I am an engineer and know NOTHING about the medical field. Furthermore, I am very uneasy about blood, guts, that sort of thing... I like all of my wife's friends but most of them are from medical school, and the one's that aren't are nurses, EMT's, etc. When they get together I am instantly excluded as the big words roll out. I sometimes try to joke along to get them to change the subject. For instance the other day as they were all talking about this procedure I jumped in and explained that "that was nothing compared to this Aortic Dissection that I performed yesterday!" and then about my "Hyperthalamus Extraction Procedure." But it doesn't work. I will forever be the outcast. What is it about Medical people that they feel they need to talk about it ALL THE TIME? Honestly, when I hang with engineer friends of mine we don't talk about moments of inertia or this great calculation I performed yesterday. Because its BORING.
 

krabmas

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I am the med student and woman in my relationship. My Fiance is always bored when my friends and I talk blood and guts and school.

The reason why we talk about it so much though is because it is our passion. Few people go into medicine that are not passionate about it. And those people that are not passionate about medicine end up being friends with other types of people or other non-passionate medical people and then they don't talk so much about medicine.

Eventhough I know it gets boring - wouldn't you rather be with a person that loves what they do?

I know I wouldn't want to be with someone who was missrable and hated his career.
 

SBL

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llort said:
really, do any males post on this crying about their women in med school?
I am a male married to a doctor. She is an OB/GYN which I understand is one of the worst specialties with regard to hours. Now that I have found this forum I will cry plenty.
 

SBL

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johndoe2k5 said:
My situation is one of the rare cases where my wife is the resident doctor and I'm in no way involved in the medical field. I never find anyone else who is in my situation & most organizations for spouses of residents are all women.
I think it's worse for someone in my situation than when it's reversed. My wife & I got married right before the residency started & prior to that we dated 10 years. And thus far I don't see the difference between her medical school & her residency in terms of the amount of time she has or in the way she treats me. The rest remains to be seen. All of her co-workers significant others are in some way involved in the medical profession & whenever we all get together I feel awkward & no one does anything to make me feel comfortable. All they talk about is medical crap & it is boring as hell! I'll bet most if not all of them don't even have sex anymore. I often look at my ding dong & wonder if I'll ever get to use it again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:(
Where have you been all of my life? Finally, someone who understands me. I am not in the medical field either and my wife doesnt understand why I hate getting together with her lmedical school friends, or when I do I seem dispondent and withdrawn. You and I have to get together and have coffee or something.
 

johndoe2k5

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SBL said:
Where have you been all of my life? Finally, someone who understands me. I am not in the medical field either and my wife doesn’t understand why I hate getting together with her lmedical school friends, or when I do I seem dispondent and withdrawn. You and I have to get together and have coffee or something.
lol.. I was thinking there were a few of you out there but when you compare it nationwide with the statistics it is rare to have the spouse of a resident doctor be a male and not be in the field itself! I'm not saying it doesn't exist but in the programs where it does I'll bet my money on the fact there is only one case in each of those programs.

Let me start by saying it absolutely SUCKS & naturally this depends on the individual case & how the resident in your case handles her own situation. In my particular case my wife needs ALL of her time for her career because she needs to work extra hard for herself to understand it & to learn. And naturally she had to match at the busiest program in the country in her particular specialty which is cheap as hell & don't give her any time off! And if this isn't bad enough as it sounds the spouse also happens to be one of these people who is unbelievably close to her family so she takes all of her vacation time and spends it flying back to see them & leaves us with the crap left over after she gets done with work which is basically NOTHING! I know some of you out there are probably playing the violin right about now but I promise you if you were in my case you'd be bitching as well. I think the other thing that tickles me about this is her program doesn't do a damn thing to help the spouses out with employment. My wife started her residency in 2002 & this is right in the middle of the job crisis in this country which many people don't want to admit to. I mean you have to up and relocate to where these folks match & just pray there is an opportunity in that area in what your skills are in. In today’s job market this is a total joke because you can't do that. You go where the jobs are or you don't work that is all there is too it! Good luck trying to make a resident doctor understand this when they haven't even set there feet into the real world in the past 15 years as they've had their noses buried into books since!

I also can't believe the medical benefits hospitals are offering to these resident doctors and their families. It's the most pathetic thing I have ever witnessed in my life. I mean these are the folks who basically make or break these facilities & they don't offer them full coverage?!?!?! I had better medical coverage working my first year in technology as a computer operator & I was making a better annual salary as well!

When this residency of hers is over I'm going to take a long a$% vacation & go to San Diego & drink a few (if I'm still alive by then). Does anyone know if there is a psych program somewhere in the country that resinstalls the personalities these resident doctors had before they entered med school because I'm really missing the person my wife used to be. The day she comes home & talks about something other than what happens at work will be the day my smile comes back.

:smuggrin:
 

LADoc00

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SBL said:
I am a male married to a doctor. She is an OB/GYN which I understand is one of the worst specialties with regard to hours. Now that I have found this forum I will cry plenty.
WTF are you talking about.

You are in hog heaven. You can lay around the house, play video games, occasionally flirt with coeds and have a wife too tired to ever nag you. Plus you get spend all her $$$. Dude, what the hell do you want from life?
 

LADoc00

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johndoe2k5 said:
My situation is one of the rare cases where my wife is the resident doctor and I'm in no way involved in the medical field. I never find anyone else who is in my situation & most organizations for spouses of residents are all women.
I think it's worse for someone in my situation than when it's reversed. My wife & I got married right before the residency started & prior to that we dated 10 years. And thus far I don't see the difference between her medical school & her residency in terms of the amount of time she has or in the way she treats me. The rest remains to be seen. All of her co-workers significant others are in some way involved in the medical profession & whenever we all get together I feel awkward & no one does anything to make me feel comfortable. All they talk about is medical crap & it is boring as hell! I'll bet most if not all of them don't even have sex anymore. I often look at my ding dong & wonder if I'll ever get to use it again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:(

Dude, hit up craigslist and meet a new "friend."
:smuggrin:
 

LADoc00

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DebDynamite said:
LADoc00,
I think you aren't getting the kind of women you >really< want for a *reason*.

As for you guys married to the she-docs, I actually symapthize. It is pretty lame to have to subject your SO to doctor speak all the time. I try and keep my (soon to be ex- damn this medical business) boyfriend as far from it as possible. I can tell he's bored outta his mind. And my dear girlfriend in class, her boyfriend puts up with it- but he looks utterly bored too.
Deb why dont you admit it, although a well off guy will occasionally dip down into the proverbial trailer park and scoop a hot young chick up for a wife and even make it work, the converse isnt and will never be true for women. Women in the end will never accept a downward marriage arrangement. And being a fem doc, you price yourself out of 90% of the male market. But luckily, I being a guy, get to eat the whole damn pie! ;)
 

LADoc00

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DebDynamite said:
Dahling, with this kind of attitude, I'm sure you'll get plenty-o-pie. But, oh, the delectables you'll never even dream of that you're missing.....

Really, I'll stick to my select market, thanks. ;)

I like the buffet style, even though I dont eat everything, I like seeing all the pies laid out, waiting, saying softly to my subconscious "Pick me, pick me, Im delicious!"

Im not saying I eat the cheap looking store bought pies when there is a some juicy fresh hot cherry pie right next to it, but Im a man who likes options.

Also, the pie is really made by its topping be they fresh whip cream or homemade vanilla ice cream or fudge.
 

Cuteasaurus

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Honestly, I'm not sure that it's that there are so few males who have wives/gfs in the medical field. I think that they're just less likely to a) know about this forum and b) be looking for some "online support group."