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Which one are you?? !!!

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rmbsstock

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This is what she told me, " Six years ago I went to see my OB. When I got to the very busy office, the front desk informed me that since I haven’t been seen there for a while, they changed my doctor. I argued a lot, since I loved my female doctor, she has a gentle personality. I sat angry till they called my name. I went to the regular small exam room with its ' torture’ bed as I call it. As I sat down all naked with a paper gown and a measly paper sheet covering myself, totally scared of what’s going to happen, a handsome young doctor, almost my age, knocks at the door and walks in! I am totally distracted from the minute he walkes in, with his kind demeanor and interesting questions, “ so, you are here for a regular check up, although you have not been here for quiet some time! -Yes, I know.. “May I call you …my first name?”
-Yes, absolutely.
“ Do you want to have a female nurse in the room with us for your comfort and this is great for so many ladies, what ever you feel you are comfortable with”
No I’d rather not. I answered him. For me a stranger is a stranger, it does not matter a male or a female!!
He guided me to lie down. He uncovered one part at a time and covered it by himself before moving to the other side. He kept on talking about his big Italian family, and how they drove their mother crazy, how mothers suffer a lot with children but at the end it’s all worth it. He finished examining my upper body while I kept on holding to his voice and stories, distracting myself from being shy, ashamed…etc. He asked me to push myself down the exam bed while guiding one foot at a time in the stirrups. This time he started to explain what he is about to do, what he was doing, and if I am feeling OK. When he was done, he helped me raise myself back up the bed (I have a small figure) and helped me sit down. He explained to me about when I will receive the results, asked about any concerns, and left. My only concern at that time is I wished to be married one day, in my next life to a genuinely nice person like him!! I gave my friends this Dr.’s name and told them how kind this Doc. is and how he seems to be very respectful to your feelings. As far as I know at least two went to see him.
Another breast cancer case in my family. I had to get my first mammogram. I decided to shop for a new OBGYN. It has been four years, and that busy office that took my first female OB from me, did not even send me one card in the past four years to schedule another yearly checkup! I thought they do not need me as their patient anymore!!
I heard of a great old doctor with a great facility. Plus, you can do the mammogram on the same day, in the same facility. I was fascinated when I walked in to this new OB office. Women were called by first name and date and month of birth, (wow) ' I thought to myself ' I love this HIPPA thing when it is done right. There have a special TV broadcasting about women health, all beautiful cherry wood chairs with maroon leather, etc, ..etc.
Then, I was called to the exam room. Not to the torture bed, I thought to myself, after my experience with my kind young doctor my views have changed.
I sat again on a nicer examination bed this time, everything looked more elaborate. Then, the door opened up and here comes a six foot five inches, 250 pounds doctor at the end of his fifties, accompanied by a tall woman that could be a nurse, a tech, or a secretary in training... I understand the liability issue, but for God’s sake say something about her, introduce her, but why do you assume that I don’t care to know?!! How about we invite the whole group at the front desk to watch, maybe sell some popcorn and sell coke!! ' I don't know but I just became very upset'
He looked in my chart “Oh this is an Italian name” he looked at the 'nurse' beside him both already standing at the end of the ‘torture bed, then he says TO HER “see, I can pronounce it correct because I am originally Italian” SHE LOOKS AT HIM AND SMILES. I was thinking how about a group hug now !!
He looked at me then said (thank God he recognized I exist) “Nice name” Then, he pulled his stool and asked me to turn around (see, I was still sitting on the side of the exam bed) “ Put your feet here in the stirrups, I know all women hate this exam, so let us get it out of the way” He pulled my sheet off, and started inserting things inside of me before I laid down…” Both him and his ‘female partner ‘ started looking inside of me. “Well hone" he said to me " pregnancy and kids kill our bodies” (this was the first thing I agreed with him, I have a small figure and my son was 9 pound 6oz). Then he asked me “ do you leak? It seams that your holes moved from their places”
“yes, a little, but I am not planning on doing anything about it right now” I replied almost in a baby voice ready to cry..I do not know why then I felt so darn insulted. He pushed his chair back, and he left me laying there thinking of my holes, and my leakage issue. I thought to myself that I really wanted to discuss this issue with my OBGYN since it really interferes with my work as a dance instructor, but I will never discuss anything with him.
As I laid there,I heard the Doc talking to his ' partner' about me “ I guess its too late to ask her how much did the baby weight?” . Which made me think, why wouldn't he want to ask me, yet he laughs about it with this lady!!! I just turned 40, does that means among doctors that I am old!!!, is that how I am going to be looked at!! Did all my young years pass...
After all this, I did not remember anything he and his happy woman partner did. The only thing that I remember is them walking towards me to check my breasts, and all what’s left on me is the little blankie covering what was checked and violated! I helped myself disassociate..
I swore I would not betray my kind, caring doctor again, and I will go back to him. As for this one, never ever will I see him again. Then I got this phone call from a nurse while I was driving and I almost hit the truck infront of me: . I remember her saying " abnormal pap smear...cells...HPV, we need to do more testing...culture, you have to be there on 12/14 at 10" Then she said " you have to do pap smear every three months now..."

So now what!!
 
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rmbsstock

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:oops:
That is borderline unreadable.

English is not my first language, but that is NOT an excuse. I understand that as long as I live here, go to school here, and work in this country, then I need to speak its language. I'll try harder to work on my language before I post in the future.
Thank you for the feeddback:thumbup::)
 

hef

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It's not that your English is bad, on the contrary, it's just that the paragraphs are all wrong, or rather, lacking. Too cluttered. To me, at least.
 

MJB

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:oops:

English is not my first language, but that is NOT an excuse. I understand that as long as I live here, go to school here, and work in this country, then I need to speak its language. I'll try harder to work on my language before I post in the future.
Thank you for the feeddback:thumbup::)


Please don't take offense...as the other poster is correct. I was having trouble mostly with the organization of the post.

I think I get the gist of what you were trying to say, however. :)

I guarantee you're better with your 2nd language than I am mine! ;)
 

rmbsstock

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It's not that your English is bad, on the contrary, it's just that the paragraphs are all wrong, or rather, lacking. Too cluttered. To me, at least.
You know you are correct! I thought that we can not use a very big space to post our issues (to leave a space for others to post:D ), and I have a long story to tell!! Therefore, I tried to put sentences back to back to minimize the space as much as I can. Well, I guess I am wrong and I can use more space, and separate the paragraphs in the order they should be in (to the best of my knowledge):idea: :idea:
Thanks again, I am learning a lot from all the feedback I am getting :love::love:

PS. I keep forgetting that there is a lot of space in cyberspace and we can all fit in :claps::eyebrow: (whatever...)
 

Jccripe

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words forming sentences. ohh "i cant read" are you dyslexic are just that bored to make jokes about paragraph spacing. OMG.
 

rmbsstock

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I really appreciate the caring about the language, but how about the individual in the real story? Should she go with her test results to her old doc who she did not see in a long time and he has no opening till the spring of 2010? Or, should she stick with this new doctor. The new one must be really good as a doctor, to be in business that long, and that rich to afford that kind of that clinic. However, she feels violated as a human being with him!!
What do you think of the way she was treated? do you think the old (in age) doctor did not do anything wrong, and he had to hurry up since he has a lot of other patients to worry about? Maybe she is too sensitive!!
Do they teach ANYTHING about how to treat a patients during medical school? I am not putting down the training, I am just wondering!!
Do you know that two out of five girls in the US have been sexually violated before they reach the age of eighteen!! That means, whether you are a female or male doctor you can be quiet the healer or the 'violator' . What if the patient does not want to have two people in the room?
There are so many unanswered questions, that I do not know where to start to answer them. I wish I can get some direction before Monday.
Thanks
 

Heathcliff

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What if the patient does not want to have two people in the room?

I think it is dangerous not to have two people in the room. The patient could falsely accuse the doctor of sexually molesting her, or worse, the accusation could be true: google "Charles Momah"
 

rmbsstock

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She said " Thank you so much for the clarification about having another female in the room, and to all the people who answered my post. I wish to hear more feed back about what you think.
Oh and thank you for all the requests for the update...thank you ...(just kidding:):laugh::)
OK, I went to the next appointment to the same old age Doc, since all my peers advised me that since he ordered more tests, to go back and do them and then take the results to the doctor that I like. (is that appropriate??!) When I went back, he said that he needs to take another sample to find out the DNA of the abnormal cells since he does not want to end up with an aggressive cancer later that we have to deal with. ( I am not an OBG, but he did the same thing except he used a different brush that at the beginning you do not feel anything, but by the time you stand up, you feel pain inside of you that you cannot pinpoint where the heck it's coming from!!). He did not do a biopsy, but he said that based on the results of this test we will do a biopsy.
Since my friend works at a major lab where most OBGYN send their tests there, I called her, and to make the story short this is what we figured out:
1) He could have done the DNA testing on the first pap, when the results came back abnormal, couldn't he?
2) He sent the second sample to a different lab, and now he billed my insurance for another visit and test. (is that ethical?)
My question is, am I being too accusatory to my doctor just because I do not like him, maybe personally? Should we watch out for things like this and ask questions..I do not think we really can, cause I personally might feel offended if someone kept mistrusting me!!
The results are not out (thank God)
But what do you think? Should we question these issues? "
 
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Global Disrobal

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Unfortunately this forum is not meant to solicit or offer personal medical advice. Please discuss this matter with a health care professional.
 
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