2021 Personal Statement Readers!

Veterinary Science Graduate Certificate from UofI
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sheltermed said:
Thanks so much for the feedback- I'm just going through it now. After Monday (biochem final :scared:) I'll be able to work on it a lot more and then resend it to some/all of my readers :p

And just so you know - I loved those cats sooo much!!! I loved my job. It definitely wasn't meant to come off as complaining, just trying to show that their version of clinic+shelter wasn't great. Will definitely have to revisit the intro and make it sound more positive!
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I don't even remember who all I've sent it to. I might have to recheck my 'sent' email folders


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Sorry I kind of fell off editing. Just started a job and hopefully will get back in the swing soon. There's a lot replying to feedback on google docs--when you guys are ready for me to step in, would you just send me a PM to let me know? Thanks!
 
sheltermed said:
And just so you know - I loved those cats sooo much!!! I loved my job. It definitely wasn't meant to come off as complaining, just trying to show that their version of clinic+shelter wasn't great. Will definitely have to revisit the intro and make it sound more positive!
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Don't worry about it! My first PS was about the room in animal control where we euthanized animals (yeah, you read that correctly). It read like a funeral dirge and I ended up scrapping the entire thing and doing a 100% rewrite because I couldn't find any way at all to make it positive and it was just too depressing to really showcase me. It was literally so sad that the first friend I showed it to called me at midnight (when she read it) to tell me that she had always been 100% sure I would get into veterinary school, but absolutely not with a PS like that. :p

Yours isn't too bad by comparison, just needs some fixing to be a bit more positive than it is. :)
 
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I know that there's several of you who are still waiting for me to look over your PS. I am so, so sorry for the wait! I got very caught up with finals, graduation, and moving back in with my parents for the summer. I plan to catch up and knock out as many as I can this weekend.

I'm very sorry; I feel awful about leaving you you guys on the hook for so long.
 
I'm currently very bored at work, so if anyone wants to send me their PS, I can look at it now!
 
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I don't have anything going on until August, except for work, so I'm avaliable to look at PSs or other application material :)
 
lilylilac said:
I'm currently very bored at work, so if anyone wants to send me their PS, I can look at it now!
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I know the feeling. I am on page 98 of my thesis (without figures and graphs) and its finally coming to a close.
 
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Osudairy said:
I know the feeling. I am on page 98 of my thesis (without figures and graphs) and its finally coming to a close.
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Yeah...lit searches just didn't sound appealing, so I figured I'd try to help others be productive.

You're almost done! I remember when I was trying to finish up my short novel of a dissertation (250+ pages) and thought it would never end.
 
If possible, I would like someone to bounce some ideas off of for my rewrite!

One of the vets I work with suggested that I talk about one of my hobbies and perhaps about some transferable skills I learned from them and/or relate them to my experiences. The only thing I could really think of is playing video games, which she thought might be a good idea.

Edit: deleted what I wrote so no one steals my idea, lol XD

Edit: She also thought I might like to talk about being on the other side of vet med, as a client, since I have an older special needs kitty that gets a lot of care. I've definitely learned a lot just from that. Not sure if all this could be integrated smoothly.

But yeah, if anyone might be able to help me put together some ideas to make them flow, I'd really appreciate it!!
 
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I have no idea how to help with that, but I think that is a REALLY cool idea! What a neat perspective on the PS- who woulda thunk to talk about video games and how those skills will translate well into vet med! I'm sure any of the readers on here will be great at giving some input. Good luck!
 
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lhmhtd said:
I have no idea how to help with that, but I think that is a REALLY cool idea! What a neat perspective on the PS- who woulda thunk to talk about video games and how those skills will translate well into vet med! I'm sure any of the readers on here will be great at giving some input. Good luck!
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Thanks!!! That's super encouraging. I thought people would think it's weird or I shouldn't use it. I hope no one steals it now!!! Haha

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sheltermed said:
Thanks!!! That's super encouraging. I thought people would think it's weird or I shouldn't use it. I hope no one steals it now!!! Haha

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If you want to make sure no one steals it, I would suggest editing your previous comment and removing the text. The more people that see it, the more possible it could be for someone to steal it!


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lhmhtd said:
I have no idea how to help with that, but I think that is a REALLY cool idea! What a neat perspective on the PS- who woulda thunk to talk about video games and how those skills will translate well into vet med! I'm sure any of the readers on here will be great at giving some input. Good luck!
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Would you mind just deleting my quote, in case someone actually decides to take my idea? Lol, sorry, paranoid now!

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I really don't think (or would hope) anyone would steal PS ideas. I've never heard of that happening. If she wants to discuss ideas, I think that's fair.

Sheltermed, there's someone on this forum (and I can't remember who) who was really into bowling and wrote their PS on how bowling compared to vet med. I know I've seen it before on here somewhere! But generally I think that's a cool idea. The interview question "so what are your interests outside of animals?" will pop up a lot. So I think it's great to talk about things as long as they sell you, which seems like you're accomplishing
 
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Part of my PS was non animal related but it was important to how I got to where I am today. I got a couple complements on my PS when stuff came up in interviews, so it worked out for me.
 
rockatiel said:
I really don't think (or would hope) anyone would steal PS ideas. I've never heard of that happening. If she wants to discuss ideas, I think that's fair.

Sheltermed, there's someone on this forum (and I can't remember who) who was really into bowling and wrote their PS on how bowling compared to vet med. I know I've seen it before on here somewhere! But generally I think that's a cool idea. The interview question "so what are your interests outside of animals?" will pop up a lot. So I think it's great to talk about things as long as they sell you, which seems like you're accomplishing
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That was my first PS, used it my first year applying, then scrapped the idea. It can work, but it isn't easy to do and has to be done carefully. I personally decided it wasn't worth it to do it the other two years I applied. I think talking about experiences outside of vet med isn't a bad thing, but I wouldn't necessarily focus on it as a theme of the PS. You need to have a nice balance of other things in there as well.
 
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DVMDream said:
That was my first PS, used it my first year applying, then scrapped the idea. It can work, but it isn't easy to do and has to be done carefully. I personally decided it wasn't worth it to do it the other two years I applied. I think talking about experiences outside of vet med isn't a bad thing, but I wouldn't necessarily focus on it as a theme of the PS. You need to have a nice balance of other things in there as well.
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And you have to really be careful how you relate that outside experience to vet med because if you don't balance it with some actual discussion of vet experience/science/medicine it can easily come across as naive.
 
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DVMDream said:
That was my first PS, used it my first year applying, then scrapped the idea. It can work, but it isn't easy to do and has to be done carefully. I personally decided it wasn't worth it to do it the other two years I applied. I think talking about experiences outside of vet med isn't a bad thing, but I wouldn't necessarily focus on it as a theme of the PS. You need to have a nice balance of other things in there as well.
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Oh! That was you! :)
 
rockatiel said:
Oh! That was you! :)
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Yup. I actually went back searching a bit just for that PS, couldn't find it. I definitely would have posted it here if I had found it. It was a long time ago, that laptop is long gone and the email account I used back then has been deactivated for at least 5 or 6 years.
 
DVMDream said:
And you have to really be careful how you relate that outside experience to vet med because if you don't balance it with some actual discussion of vet experience/science/medicine it can easily come across as naive.
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Hmm. I think I might like to still try? My main angle here is setting myself apart a bit because of my GPA. I still have no idea how I'd say any of it, but the vet I talked to just recommended a couple sentences or so, which seems ok. I dunno, I'll have to brainstorm!

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I've heard that using childhood anecdotes is a bad idea. Is that usually the case?

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sheltermed said:
I've heard that using childhood anecdotes is a bad idea. Is that usually the case?

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I don't know that it's a bad idea. It's fairly common so it doesn't stand out quite as much as another angle might, but I started my PS with a childhood anecdote and although a few of them commented on it being common, none of the people I asked to read last year or this year seemed to think it was a bad idea. As with almost everything else, I think there's probably a good way and a bad way to use one.
 
sheltermed said:
I've heard that using childhood anecdotes is a bad idea. Is that usually the case?

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It's extremely difficult to do so without landing firmly in cliché territory. Also, in my experience (and since many childhood anecdotes are about a veterinarian saving a childhood pet in an emergency), such stories tend to be more about the veterinarian that helped you and less about you, which isn't a good thing for a personal statement.

They can be done, they just take a little more finesse.
 
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lilylilac said:
Yeah...lit searches just didn't sound appealing, so I figured I'd try to help others be productive.

You're almost done! I remember when I was trying to finish up my short novel of a dissertation (250+ pages) and thought it would never end.
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PhD? Yeah that makes my Master's thesis look like a pop up book haha. At least there will be another incoming OSU student with a grad degree!
 
Osudairy said:
Wow, that is some dedication lol. Pending research discussions when we start in the fall? lol
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I've already been told how crazy I am haha. I'm sure research discussions will be a given!
 
lilylilac said:
I've already been told how crazy I am haha. I'm sure research discussions will be a given!
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Yeah, I've had people call me crazy too. When I told them I wanted to get a master's first, they all were like :eek:. Still would do it all over again.
 
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For those who have sent me a PS and have not received a reply yet:
First - sorry! Had a crazy couple weeks at work right up until my last day, and since have been getting ready for my trip. Which brings me to...
Second - I am going to be on hiatus from doing critiques until the 27th. If you have already sent me something and don't mind waiting, expect to receive something back from me that week. If you revise your draft before then, please send me the new version! And if for whatever reason you no longer need my services at that point, just let me know.
Thanks :D
 
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Would anyone be willing to read my explanatory statement? I have been reading a lot on a different thread about them and just wanted to see if what I've written is going to be good or bad to include.

To preface my situation: I got a late start to my pursuit of vet school, I have struggled a lot in my pre reqs and because of that my gpa is quite low.

Anyone who has any experience with these statements that could read mine would be great.

Thanks guys!
 
scott1818 said:
Would anyone be willing to read my explanatory statement? I have been reading a lot on a different thread about them and just wanted to see if what I've written is going to be good or bad to include.

To preface my situation: I got a late start to my pursuit of vet school, I have struggled a lot in my pre reqs and because of that my gpa is quite low.

Anyone who has any experience with these statements that could read mine would be great.

Thanks guys!
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I wouldn't mind. I'm off today, so if you can send it today I can probably get a pretty quick turn around.
 
Does anyone have time to read something other than a PS?

I have 2 supplemental essays (1000 characters each) and a brief explanation statement that I would love to get at least one person's feedback on this year if anybody has the time to do so. I know you guys probably get busy though. ;)
 
I appreciate all of you for doing this for those of us who are applying! I have yet to even start on the actual writing of my PS, but I plan to lock myself up for a weekend sometime soon. I am also waiting for a moment of passion to strike as that is when I do my best writing. ;)
 
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Emily Faith said:
I appreciate all of you for doing this for those of us who are applying! I have yet to even start on the actual writing of my PS, but I plan to lock myself up for a weekend sometime soon. I am also waiting for a moment of passion to strike as that is when I do my best writing. ;)
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Still waiting for mine as well!!! :help:
 
finnickthedog said:
Does anyone have time to read something other than a PS?

I have 2 supplemental essays (1000 characters each) and a brief explanation statement that I would love to get at least one person's feedback on this year if anybody has the time to do so. I know you guys probably get busy though. ;)
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I could read through for grammatical errors. (I just got my English diploma in the mail! I feel all official and stuff.) But I wouldn't have any application advice because I'm in the same boat you are. :p
 
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finnickthedog said:
Does anyone have time to read something other than a PS?

I have 2 supplemental essays (1000 characters each) and a brief explanation statement that I would love to get at least one person's feedback on this year if anybody has the time to do so. I know you guys probably get busy though. ;)
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I wouldn't mind!
 
Anyone available to look at my newest PS draft?
 
Would anyone be willing to read the first 3 paragraphs/ 1700 words of my PS to see if I'm on track/ not lame/ this idea is actually exciting and memorable?

I essentially trashed my first one because it was going no where and chock full of mistakes. So I made a plan and fixed it to have a theme.
 
cdoconn said:
Would anyone be willing to read the first 3 paragraphs/ 1700 words of my PS to see if I'm on track/ not lame/ this idea is actually exciting and memorable?

I essentially trashed my first one because it was going no where and chock full of mistakes. So I made a plan and fixed it to have a theme.
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I'll be catching up on the ones I've received throughout the day tomorrow if you want to send it my way
 
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