It's all relative to whether or not it is an important aspect/component of who you personally were. I know people who are URM (African American, Native American) with fantastic stats who still didn't get into any schools despite their "advantage." These were the few who also pretty much grew up very upper middle class, and were very removed from their "cultural roots," slash had no interest in serving the people they "supposedly represent." Checking it off doesn't automatically give you an advantage if nowhere in your application reflects an interest in serving the historically underserved, and fibbing your way to say that you do after no past/previous experience/trends working with such communities to suggest otherwise would end the same way. I'm not denying that it's a component that admissions people look at, and it may give one person an edge if it's relevant. Many people have also PM'd me asking me "wow, which schools should I apply to? I'm Vietnamese too and want to know where I would be considered URM," which reflects a general misunderstanding and misguided perspective on how admissions folk actually view this component of the application.
From my understanding, many URMs have had people straight out saying to them "Wow, you have so many acceptances/IIs! Is it because you're a URM?" aren't being overly sensitive when they respond that they feel uncomfortable with responding to such a question. From being around several of my friends, many of them share experiences where people were actually straight-up hostile and went out their way to invalidate said person's hard work (as if they did not rightfully earn their spot). Case in point, a large majority of the folks I do know who are considered URM/minorities at my school have been asked things along the lines of, "Wow, you got into X (fantastic school like an ivy league) for undergrad? Was it for a sports scholarship or something?" or "Well, duh, it's because you're a minority."
Microaggressions and microinvalidations over time lead to perceived defensive comments whenever anyone gets on the topic of race as a significant factor for a reason, even if it's innocently asked/expected on a forum like SDN 😛. You're all not in the wrong to want to know to see if there's something incredibly lacking in your own applications as you don't build yourself up with a false sense of hope, but there's probably a more tactful way (practice that cultural competency!) of asking the question/approaching the topic. Then everyone's happy 😀