Funny quotes from "less informed" premeds

[TheGloaming]

Post any funny comments you've overheard from other premeds that really don't know what they are talking about.


Premed student: I think I'm going to apply to cornell.
Other Student: Is that a good school?
Premed student: I don't really know but I have all the preqes done for them so that makes it a good school.


(While the dean of admissions is talking about the application process at a premed meeting)
Premed student: Are the interviews mandatory?

I know I've heard others but just can't think of them.

---

Members don't see this ad.

 

[matterotime]

"I can use a calculator on the MCAT, right?"

I used to find that mildly entertaining.

 

[ozzi22]

one of my pre med friends did not know about a thing called RESIDENCY. she was like, hey immediately after med school, i will be making 200K +.

 

[FutureDr8429033]

one of my pre med friends did not know about a thing called RESIDENCY. she was like, hey immediately after med school, i will be making 200K +.

Not a quote, but I know of a guy who didn't know about residency until AFTER HE STARTED at DO school. Just straight up didn't know it existed or what it was, etc. Derpitty-derp-dee-durp.

 

[NurWollen]

Not a quote, but I know of a guy who didn't know about residency until AFTER HE STARTED at DO school. Just straight up didn't know it existed or what it was, etc. Derpitty-derp-dee-durp.

Unbelievable.

I remember a girl in my high school sophomore English class saying she was, "Going into pediatrics." I few months later she had figured out that she didn't like blood, and decided she was, "Going into journalism."

 

[PressPforPi]

Here's two cases that I found to be sad but funny.

Me: So what made you decide to pick MD over DO?
Person: DO? Is that like a nurse or something?

Same person by the way...

Me: So how are you doing in your pre-reqs?
Person: B's mostly, except for college algebra. I just failed the mid-term with an F.

 

[Iapyx]

Past story

Me: so are you applying this semester?
Student: yep.
Me: cool. Well good luck.
Student: Thanks. I really don't think I should have a problem getting in though... I'm applying to the state school and a few ivys.
Me: Nice
Student: Yeah, plus after this semester my GPA should be up to a 3.45.
Me:

 

[Syqers]

I once had a pre-med tell me she was just going to apply to Harvard. I told her that it's pretty hard to get in there - maybe she'd want some backup schools. She said, "Yeah, well most people that apply there have no business applying there."

I gave her a thumbs up and said, "I'm sure you're gonna do just great."

 

[Poliscidoc]

Medical school is going to suck if I get a teacher like house


Not a quote but a premed in my genetics class had a white coat made and wore it to class and hospital volunteering.


Name . Pre-Med
College Name
Year of grad

 

[NurWollen]

Past story

Me: so are you applying this semester?
Student: yep.
Me: cool. Well good luck.
Student: Thanks. I really don't think I should have a problem getting in though... I'm applying to the state school and a few ivys.
Me: Nice
Student: Yeah, plus after this semester my GPA should be up to a 3.45.
Me:

It's stories like that that give me hope. I mean, no wonder there are schools recieving 10000 applications for 100 spots... 9500 of those applications are probably junk apps by people who have no idea where they are applying to or whether their grades match those schools stats.

 

[Syqers]

It's stories like that that give me hope. I mean, no wonder there are schools recieving 10000 applications for 100 spots... 9500 of those applications are probably junk apps by people who have no idea where they are applying to or whether their grades match those schools stats.

Heh, you wish! More like 3,000 of those are junk applicants. More likely that those schools with 10,000 applications have a lot of serious pre-medical students applying.

 

[BigEast55]

I was on an interview at an unnamed MD school and they brought us in a MS4 to sell us on the school. There she told us that a selling point for this college was "so much time in the hospital in the third and fourth years," clearly not recognizing that every single school in the nation spends all their time in the 3rd and the vast majority of the 4th year in the hospital. It was absolutely stunning and pretty much made me immediately not want to go there.

 

[raab32]

A postbac who was in my Physics 1 class during undergrad, regarding a kinematics problem involving a hummingbird:

"But I don't get it... It's a hummingbird so we don't have to account for gravity right?"

Birds are immune to the effects of gravity.

Also, during high school, we were filling out forms for the PSAT maybe and there was a section where we filled in our anticipated major. Someone raises her hand and asks "is premedicine the same as pre-med?"

And OP, great username. Amazing track, amazing album.

 

[Perrotfish]

I was on an interview at an unnamed MD school and they brought us in a MS4 to sell us on the school. There she told us that a selling point for this college was "so much time in the hospital in the third and fourth years," clearly not recognizing that every single school in the nation spends all their time in the 3rd and the vast majority of the 4th year in the hospital. It was absolutely stunning and pretty much made me immediately not want to go there.

She might have meant that they start clinicals earlier than other schools, so you have less classroom time and more hospital time. That would have been the case atf my school (Tulane). They shaved two month of the preclinical cirriculum so that we can start in May, rather than July.

 

[toff4l]

Past story

Me: so are you applying this semester?
Student: yep.
Me: cool. Well good luck.
Student: Thanks. I really don't think I should have a problem getting in though... I'm applying to the state school and a few ivys.
Me: Nice
Student: Yeah, plus after this semester my GPA should be up to a 3.45.
Me:

It could happen.

 

[Geekchick921]

Not a quote but a premed in my genetics class had a white coat made and wore it to class and hospital volunteering.


Name . Pre-Med
College Name
Year of grad

GTFO... seriously?!

A postbac who was in my Physics 1 class during undergrad, regarding a kinematics problem involving a hummingbird:

"But I don't get it... It's a hummingbird so we don't have to account for gravity right?"

Birds are immune to the effects of gravity.

Also, during high school, we were filling out forms for the PSAT maybe and there was a section where we filled in our anticipated major. Someone raises her hand and asks "is premedicine the same as pre-med?"

And OP, great username. Amazing track, amazing album.

LO-freakin'-L.

 

[phnerd1105]

At my MCAT two days ago:

Student 1: I mean, I haven't studied at all but I think I'll do well.
Student 2: Oh that's a good idea! Even if you don't do well, you don't have to send your scores when you apply.
Student 1: Yeah thats true. I'm sure I'll get a 35+ though.

 

[Donnie1310]

At my MCAT two days ago:

Student 1: I mean, I haven't studied at all but I think I'll do well.
Student 2: Oh that's a good idea! Even if you don't do well, you don't have to send your scores when you apply.
Student 1: Yeah thats true. I'm sure I'll get a 35+ though.

Ohhhhhhhhhh that's the secret to breaking 35?? I had no clue.

 

[phnerd1105]

Ohhhhhhhhhh that's the secret to breaking 35?? I had no clue.

Seriously. I wish I knew before I put 6 months into studying for this. When they said that I almost spit out my water and had to leave the break room because I was gonna die laughing.

 

[CC8897]

I was on a plane ride and the kid sitting next to me also happened to be a premed at another school. He tried to explain to me that as a psychology major, he could graduate from college, take some "test", and officially become a psychiatrist without attending medical school.....

 

[Poliscidoc]

GTFO... seriously?!

I ****e you not. This kid was an odd bird. We volunteered in the ER together and he wore his white coat and had his own scrubs and acted like a complete dick. He thought it was so cool that nurses and patients confused him for a doctor. I thought he looked like a complete tool when he said "O im just a volunteer".

 

[Geekchick921]

I ****e you not. This kid was an odd bird. We volunteered in the ER together and he wore his white coat and had his own scrubs and acted like a complete dick. He thought it was so cool that nurses and patients confused him for a doctor. I thought he looked like a complete tool when he said "O im just a volunteer".

Amazing. Truly amazing. Were the docs and nurses just like, "WhoTF is this little dork?"

 

[Syqers]

I ****e you not. This kid was an odd bird. We volunteered in the ER together and he wore his white coat and had his own scrubs and acted like a complete dick. He thought it was so cool that nurses and patients confused him for a doctor. I thought he looked like a complete tool when he said "O im just a volunteer".

This is definitely a liability for the hospital/office. This is an insurance nightmare just waiting to happen.

 

[RogueUnicorn]

i was going to oh look this thread again this thread but then i remember i love these threads

 

[Ignatius M.D.]

I ****e you not. This kid was an odd bird. We volunteered in the ER together and he wore his white coat and had his own scrubs and acted like a complete dick. He thought it was so cool that nurses and patients confused him for a doctor. I thought he looked like a complete tool when he said "O im just a volunteer".

If he makes it in I'm going to be a little disappointed in the filtering process.

 

[Poliscidoc]

Amazing. Truly amazing. Were the docs and nurses just like, "WhoTF is this little dork?"

- The nurses laughed and made jokes and kept asking the kid questions about " in your expert opinion what test should patient x get?" Or if a room was dirty they would tell the kid "room # needs cleaning dr. (last name) stat."

- He also got picked on by doctors and they all refused to let him shadow them while they happily let us shadow him.

Finally the kid got the message and left the ER and now works at the front desk and gift shop but he still wears scrubs to work and then changes into his volunteer polo and he still wears his coat to biochem lab.

This is definitely a liability for the hospital/office. This is an insurance nightmare just waiting to happen.

HR had a huge fit over this and now the entire ER has this scrub machine and we have to get our srubs from there or we cant volunteer or work if your a Dr/Nurse. So now doctors, CNA's, PA's, RN, volunteers have certain colors of scrubs.

-Some lady collapsed in the cafeteria and the only person around was this kid and he ran to help and they thought this idiot was a doctor.

 

[Poliscidoc]

If he makes it in I'm going to be a little disappointed in the filtering process.

He applied to one school- UNC and got rejected


Who thought a 4.00 GPA/SGPA and 18 MCAT wouldn't get you in? Maybe PE isn't an awesome major. (No offense to anyone with a PE major)

 

[raltima07]

I was on a plane ride and the kid sitting next to me also happened to be a premed at another school. He tried to explain to me that as a psychology major, he could graduate from college, take some "test", and officially become a psychiatrist without attending medical school.....

Yea, but thats true though

 

[RogueUnicorn]

did this labcoat kid also have business cards with premed on them? i think i've read this one before..

 

[Poliscidoc]

did this labcoat kid also have business cards with premed on them? i think i've read this one before..

Yea same kid, I talk about it ever time one of these threads comes up. We go to a small liberal arts school and he gave out the cards to the 15 people in our genetics class.

Our general response= WTF "Thanks dude don't want to forget you"

 

[blh53]

One kid tried to convince myself and others that the DAT was a much harder test than the MCAT. He actually could be right and I would have no idea but I found that pretty amusing.

 

[RogueUnicorn]

Yea same kid, I talk about it ever time one of these threads comes up.

sweet. it just never gets old, srs

 

[kexy]

A girl on my golf team in high school (with straight C's in bio, I might add) told everyone that she was going to become a "pediatric cardiothoracic surgeon." Her mom was so proud.

 

[blh53]

A girl on my golf team in high school (with straight C's in bio, I might add) told everyone that she was going to become a "pediatric cardiothoracic surgeon." Her mom was so proud.

Lord knows there's more and more 12 year olds needing bypasses and valve replacements these days.

 

[Perrotfish]

.

 

[rhesuspieces]

This thread is why I keep coming back to SDN.

 

[Perrotfish]

Lord knows there's more and more 12 year olds needing bypasses and valve replacements these days.

It is a real pediatric surgical subspecialty. They fix congenital heart disorders, mostly. I'm not sure if there's a fellowship but there are definitely peds surgeons who do nothing my cardiac stuff.

 

[Dave Chester]

Not a quote, but I know of a guy who didn't know about residency until AFTER HE STARTED at DO school. Just straight up didn't know it existed or what it was, etc. Derpitty-derp-dee-durp.

Maybe the interviewers were sleeping on the job or super easy-going Otherwise.....

 

[kexy]

It is a real pediatric surgical subspecialty. They fix congenital heart disorders, mostly.

Haha I know it is a real subspecialty. I just thought it was a ridiculous to be choosing one before even getting into college.

 

[blh53]

It is a real pediatric surgical subspecialty. They fix congenital heart disorders, mostly. I'm not sure if there's a fellowship but there are definitely peds surgeons who do nothing my cardiac stuff.

Yeah I guess I did know that but it just didn't register right away. Currently removing my foot from my mouth.

 

[YouNeverKnow22]

met a girl who claimed she was going to major in neurology at our state medical school, she's only a sophomore *face palm*

 

[Geekchick921]

sweet. it just never gets old, srs

It's the gift that keeps on giving. Thank you, man.

Lord knows there's more and more 12 year olds needing bypasses and valve replacements these days.

Well... I was going to say this:

It is a real pediatric surgical subspecialty. They fix congenital heart disorders, mostly. I'm not sure if there's a fellowship but there are definitely peds surgeons who do nothing my cardiac stuff.

But Perrotfish already took care of it for me.

Haha I know it is a real subspecialty. I just thought it was a ridiculous to be choosing one before even getting into college.

I don't know. I could see this going two ways. Either she wanted to be the most prestigious thing that she could think of, "I want to do surgery on little kid's hearts!", or maybe she or a relative had a congenital heart defect that was repaired. If I had a little brother that was born with HLHS and is a fairly healthy young adult now thanks to the Norwood, Glenn and Fontan procedures, I could definitely see myself being motivated to pursue the same specialty that saved my sibling.

 

[thomprya]

A future applicant I know tells everyone how she is going to be going to Stanford when her gpa is pushing a 3.1 and she has never taken the mcat. She however tells everyone she got a 43 on her mcat based upon an oral 20 question mcat test administered by her dad. So stupid....

 

[rafflecopter]

A future applicant I know tells everyone how she is going to be going to Stanford when her gpa is pushing a 3.1 and she has never taken the mcat. She however tells everyone she got a 43 on her mcat based upon an oral 20 question mcat test administered by her dad. So stupid....

That doesn't even come close to making sense. Did her father recite passages orally?

 

[FutureDr8429033]

I don't know. I could see this going two ways. Either she wanted to be the most prestigious thing that she could think of, "I want to do surgery on little kid's hearts!", or maybe she or a relative had a congenital heart defect that was repaired. If I had a little brother that was born with HLHS and is a fairly healthy young adult now thanks to the Norwood, Glenn and Fontan procedures, I could definitely see myself being motivated to pursue the same specialty that saved my sibling.

WHY OH WHY are you trying to ruin this thread by exhibiting empathy/understanding/reasonable thought processes?!?!? THIS IS SDN DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!! I H8 EVERY1 WHO IZ NOT ME THEY ARE ALL ARTARDS!!!

 

[Drrrrrr. Celty]

"I'm going to use organic chemistry a lot as a doctor."

Another one was actually directed towards me being a psych major.
" I don't think you can get into medical school with a psych major. You're going to be really disadvantaged when you take the mcat and are taking classes in medical school.

 

[MacVA]

I don't know. I could see this going two ways. Either she wanted to be the most prestigious thing that she could think of, "I want to do surgery on little kid's hearts!", or maybe she or a relative had a congenital heart defect that was repaired. If I had a little brother that was born with HLHS and is a fairly healthy young adult now thanks to the Norwood, Glenn and Fontan procedures, I could definitely see myself being motivated to pursue the same specialty that saved my sibling.

Reminds me of a girl in my undergrad. She said "I want to be a peds CV doctor". I used to tutor her - could barely pass math; I think she finished undergrad with a 3.3 25 MCAT. Managed to make it in to an American MD school. And wait for it...

We found out she matched CV surgery... Joke is on us...

 

[rhesuspieces]

Here's my weirdest story: My boyfriend's coworker (not a pre-med) decided to take the MCAT just to "see how he would do." Boyfriend was confused and thought his coworker meant a practice MCAT, but nope--he was taking the real thing at the testing center on my ugrad campus. He took the test and texted my BF right afterwards with something like "that didn't go so badly!" Two weeks later he traipsed into work bragging about getting a 35P. What's wrong with that picture?

Boyfriend and I did a little sleuthing on SDN and found out that the MCAT wasn't even offered on the day he supposedly took it, and even if he had magically taken it that day, there's no way he'd already have his score back.

If you're going to lie about something, why the hell would you make up some elaborate story about doing well on the MCAT when you're not even pre-med? Lie about something awesome, like owning an elephant or winning the lotto.

 

[BigEast55]

She might have meant that they start clinicals earlier than other schools, so you have less classroom time and more hospital time. That would have been the case atf my school (Tulane). They shaved two month of the preclinical cirriculum so that we can start in May, rather than July.

Nope it was a typical school that starts them 3rd year (in fact they had almost no clinical contact before then), it was such an absurd thing to say and really said a lot to me about the school

 

[Frazier]

*Convo with a pre-med [with 3.3 GPA]*

Me: Are you considering applying to DO schools?
Pre-med: Ugh, no not really. I want to be a general surgeon.
Me: You can be a general surgeon with a DO degree.
Pre-med: Umm, no, I'm afraid you have mistaken. DO's are not licensed to do surgery. They aren't allowed in the OR.
Me: O'RLY?
Pre-med: Ya RLY.

*sends pre-med the match list of PCOM*

Pre-med: what is this?
Me: a match list. Notice how the DO school produced more general surgeons than many MD schools.
Pre-med: I see. However, you forget to account for these locations. I bet they are getting paid significantly less as a DO resident. These are likely for surgeon assistant positions.
Me: Got to go. See ya.

EDIT Part 1: It is now mid 2014. The guy above works ticketing at Disney. Looks like he should have considered DO afterall.

EDIT Part 2: Will update again in 3 more years. See you in 2017.