.......I guess it takes more than just a good heart

[ProjectGemini]

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I have been on this forum since last October, and am in the process of applying for 2008 entering class. I have read people's posts who have just awesome accomplishments and much better stats than mine. I am just feeling a bit unsure of myself these days after all those reading off SDN. I thought I'd make a great doctor, but after SDN, I don't even know if I am qualified to get accepted in a med school. I got into a fight with my parents last night because they want me to apply for only the top 25 schools or what-not. Otherwise, they won't let me go to a med school in the states. Getting into medschools in Canada is much harder, yet they do not realize this. I thought all I need to become a great doctor was MD degree from a decent school that would prepare me well for USMLE and for good residency program. I need to convince my parents, but it's just so hard. And at the same time, I am not so confident about my application anymore. I don't have stellar GPA. I didn't fly to Africa and hold a dying baby in my hand. I was working during school years and just trying to get by. I don't know. I am just frustrated.

 

[apnea]

Why do you need to convince your parents?

i'm sorry they're being losers. But this is your life, you don't NEED them to be happy with it.

 

[apnea]

First I would recommend if you every hold a dying African baby that you use both hands. Nothing is more embarassing than fumbling a baby because you were trying to hotdog.

This is sound advice.

 

[sexyman]

Im confused...

are we supposed to feel bad for you because you can't get into a top tier school?

 

[ProjectGemini]

Im confused...

are we supposed to feel bad for you because you can't get into a top tier school?

No, what I meant was my parents would not let me attend to a mid-tier school in US if I were to pay much greater tuition. I just want to become a great doctor, and I know that which school I go to is not the major factor for becoming one.

 

[cgscribe]

If you want to be a doctor, find a way. If you don't think you're competitive enough for Canadian schools or the top-tier, then go against your parents wishes. If they don't understand how important this is to you, that's their fault. Nobody is going to hold your hand through this process, it's got to be a personal decision.

 

[DrMom]

No, what I meant was my parents would not let me attend to a mid-tier school in US if I were to pay much greater tuition. I just want to become a great doctor, and I know that which school I go to is not the major factor for becoming one.

You're an adult & you need to make your own decisions. Apply where you would consider going & have appropriate stats for. Pay for med school yourself through loans.

This doesn't mean that you don't consider your parents' opinions but that you're the one that'll have to live with the decisions you make so you need to make them yourself.

 

[glamqueen]

If you are of age to apply to med school, then you are of age to cut the apron strings and live your own life. I don't understand the phrase "my parents won't let me." How is that still coming out of your mouth when you are an adult? Apply where you want to, and take out your own loan of money to do it if they won't help you (or get a job - whatever). You are an adult. Please live your own life and not the life your parents want you to live. If you continue down this path, even if you get into Harvard, you will be unhappy.

Tell your parents to back off and add some safety schools. You will be fine. 🙂 Your EC's look great btw.

 

[154241]

I am just feeling a bit unsure of myself these days after all those reading off SDN. I thought I'd make a great doctor, but after SDN, I don't even know if I am qualified to get accepted in a med school.

I don't think SDN represents an accurate cross-section of all applicants. For example, if you look up a med school on MDapps (which I think has a similar population of students), the MCAT average for accepted students can be 3 or 4 points higher than the school's actual posted average. The best applicants are overrepresented at these types of sites (I think). I don't know about top tier schools, but your stats are close to the average for a lot of other schools. Keep your head up and good luck with your parents!

 

[smq123]

If you are of age to apply to med school, then you are of age to cut the apron strings and live your own life. I don't understand the phrase "my parents won't let me." How is that still coming out of your mouth when you are an adult? Apply where you want to, and take out your own loan of money to do it if they won't help you (or get a job - whatever). You are an adult. Please live your own life and not the life your parents want you to live. If you continue down this path, even if you get into Harvard, you will be unhappy.

I can understand why everyone is telling the OP to "cut the apron strings," but I admit that, if I were in the OP shoes, the possibility of no parental support would scare me. Particularly because (from what I've heard) Canadian students can sometimes have trouble getting federal Stafford/Perkins loans, and have to rely on (gulp) private loans. It depends on which school they attend.

OP - If your parents insist on a "top 25" school in the US, remind them that there really isn't such a thing. A "Top 25" research school may not make the list for "top 25" schools for primary care, etc. If they still don't get it, just tell them that some schools are better at producing surgeons, and some schools are better at producing radiologists. This isn't true, but it's enough to get the point across.

And if they insist on pulling out the US News rankings, you can tell them that I think that the editors who came up with those rankings should be forced to scrub down my school's anatomy lab with toothbrushes. Those rankings are crap.

 

[ProjectGemini]

I feel a bit better after venting. I will try to convince my parents once they cool down. You guys are right that it is my life, but it's sort of a hard concept to be understood in an Asian family. Thank you for the sound advices 🙂

 

[tdd340]

You're an adult & you need to make your own decisions. Apply where you would consider going & have appropriate stats for. Pay for med school yourself through loans.

This doesn't mean that you don't consider your parents' opinions but that you're the one that'll have to live with the decisions you make so you need to make them yourself.

The OP stated that she is Canadian. It is not as simple as just saying take out loans. Non citizens don't qualify for financial aid and at most schools require documentation that the full amount for tuition is available in cash and put in an escrow account. I don't know alot of undergrads with 100-200k sitting in their bank accounts so she needs her parents to be able to help finance school. Getting a private bank loan requires a US co-signer which could be just as unfeasible.

 

[Joedude1920]

You have awesome ECs. Your GPA and MCAT score may be a little low for some of the schools you applied to, but for some its their average (like Jefferson I believe). Try applying to more schools that have your GPA and MCAT. Some that come to mind off the top of my head: UMDNJ and Drexel.

If you get back any secondaries, fill them out and send them out ASAP. The sooner you get everything done, the better.

Good luck! 😎

 

[etf]

we here at sdn are a pretty self-selecting group.

 

[DrMom]

The OP stated that she is Canadian. It is not as simple as just saying take out loans.

I understand, but there are still ways to get it done. She doesn't have to be stuck with her parents' demands.

 

[glamqueen]

I'm sure nontrads that aren't being supported by their parents apply to medical school from Canada. I would like to think they have options too. I'm not trying to be insensitive, but it seems like no matter the culture - the OP's family seems to get to have the life they want and the life they want for their child...when does this start for the OP? I think they should get to choose their own life path just like their parents got to...I'm sure I"m completely ignorant to the culture, but I completely feel for the OP, and I sure hope you are able to go to the med school you want to (and apply where you want) with peace. Best wishes...

 

[pjl2505]

my advice...stop visiting sdn, some of this stuff can make you feel like crap, even if it is addictive. oh, and it destroys study habits.

 

[variablistic]

Don't let everyone here on SDN get your spirits down. This is not a representative sample size of all people applying to medical school.

Parents are strange... They want the best for you, but sometimes they just don't get this whole process. My parents still thought I was a shoe-in even though I applied late and to only 4 schools. They wanted to yell at the adcoms for not admitting me either. I'm not sure they understand it yet, but maybe this cycle I can do a better job at explaining it.

Anyway, you just need to try harder to get your parents to understand. It'll be tough, and I don't know them, but it should be possible.

 

[smq123]

You guys are right that it is my life, but it's sort of a hard concept to be understood in an Asian family. Thank you for the sound advices 🙂

Ohh...you're Asian? That's tough. (I'm Asian, too.) Yeah, if you're not part of that culture, it's really hard to explain.

Hopefully they'll understand that there's no such thing as a "bad" or "lesser quality" med school in the US. Every med school has its weaknesses and strengths. This might be an unusual concept to them, being used to the Asian systems of higher education, but it's the truth. Good luck!

 

[jochi1543]

Ohh...you're Asian? That's tough. (I'm Asian, too.) Yeah, if you're not part of that culture, it's really hard to explain.

Urgh. I'm not Asian (Eurasian, I guess....Russian) and when I got into a top 25 undergrad, my father's answer was "Why not Harvard!? So-and-so's son went to Harvard!" That's coming from the same man who had spent my entire senior year of HS telling me how I'm a stupid waste of oxygen and convincing me that I'd never get in ANYWHERE, so I didn't even apply to Harvard or other Ivies - and yet in retrospect, I had a decent chance. Then once I got my $11,000/year scholarship, his reaction was "What, you couldn't get a full ride?" How many international students in America get scholarships, anyway? I bet like 200 a year.

He's still a huge negative influence in my life, but at this point I just nod and let it slide by. I know he'll be pissed no matter which medical school I get into...in fact, he doesn't think I should even be applying, because he thinks business is the only "prestigious job." He had a freaking fit when I said I'm interested in primary care, because according to him, it doesn't make sense to NOT go for the most "prestigious" field, which in his opinion is neurosurgery.🙄 I'm like, you know, I'm doing this for MYSELF, not for your gigantic ego so you could tell your drunk friends that your daughter's a Harvard neurosurgeon.🙄


/RANT

 

[smq123]

Urgh. I'm not Asian (Eurasian, I guess....Russian) and when I got into a top 25 undergrad, my father's answer was "Why not Harvard!? So-and-so's son went to Harvard!"

I'm like, you know, I'm doing this for MYSELF, not for your gigantic ego so you could tell your drunk friends that your daughter's a Harvard neurosurgeon.🙄

Ouch. I'm sorry - doesn't sound like fun. 🙁

What I was talking about with the "Asian culture" bit was not referring to the OP's parents' emphasis on prestige and reputation. I was talking about the "cutting the apron strings" part.

Asian families emphasize the importance of the GROUP over the INDIVIDUAL, so it's not surprising to me that the OP is so concerned about what her parents think/want. A lot of Asian parents really seem to believe in the idea that the everyone swims or sinks together, so it's "irresponsible" for someone to go off and do their own thing without asking the group's opinion. I could never say to my parents "I'm doing this for MYSELF, so f!ck off" because of this. I'm probably not explaining it very well, but yeah - that's our culture. (sigh)

 

[jochi1543]

Ouch. I'm sorry - doesn't sound like fun. 🙁

What I was talking about with the "Asian culture" bit was not referring to the OP's parents' emphasis on prestige and reputation. I was talking about the "cutting the apron strings" part.

Yeah, but that's what I'm getting out of this whole issue....a "get into top 10 or don't get in at all" shame-to-the-family type of deal.

But it's your choice - whether you share your parents' culture or sign up for the generic Canadian/American culture, where individuality and independence are important. I opted for the latter. Couple of fights later, my 'rents just realized I don't want the same things in life as they want for me, and that I consider their advice, but won't take it if it doesn't make sense to me.

 

[TMP-SMX]

Ouch. I'm sorry - doesn't sound like fun. 🙁

What I was talking about with the "Asian culture" bit was not referring to the OP's parents' emphasis on prestige and reputation. I was talking about the "cutting the apron strings" part.

Asian families emphasize the importance of the GROUP over the INDIVIDUAL, so it's not surprising to me that the OP is so concerned about what her parents think/want. A lot of Asian parents really seem to believe in the idea that the everyone swims or sinks together, so it's "irresponsible" for someone to go off and do their own thing without asking the group's opinion. I could never say to my parents "I'm doing this for MYSELF, so f!ck off" because of this. I'm probably not explaining it very well, but yeah - that's our culture. (sigh)

When you do become an adult it's not about independence it is about caring for your aging parents.

 

[Yehosh]

I have been on this forum since last October, and am in the process of applying for 2008 entering class. I have read people's posts who have just awesome accomplishments and much better stats than mine. I am just feeling a bit unsure of myself these days after all those reading off SDN. I thought I'd make a great doctor, but after SDN, I don't even know if I am qualified to get accepted in a med school. I got into a fight with my parents last night because they want me to apply for only the top 25 schools or what-not. Otherwise, they won't let me go to a med school in the states. Getting into medschools in Canada is much harder, yet they do not realize this. I thought all I need to become a great doctor was MD degree from a decent school that would prepare me well for USMLE and for good residency program. I need to convince my parents, but it's just so hard. And at the same time, I am not so confident about my application anymore. I don't have stellar GPA. I didn't fly to Africa and hold a dying baby in my hand. I was working during school years and just trying to get by. I don't know. I am just frustrated.

first of all, relax. It's a tough process and everybody here knows it. Don't freak out from the people with the 39T 3.98 profiles, there are way more people with 3.5 and 28, so you're fine.

Like somebody mentioned, if you want to become a physician, you can make it happen. your MCAT and GPA aren't as bad as your think, although I do agree with you that for Ontario schools, they are a long shot. I got in second time around and I know quite a few people who'll be in my class at UofT that got in 3rd time around. Ontario schools are tough, even if your parents don't realize it. Just give me their phone # and I'll call them to yell at them and explain to them just how competitive it really is.

First time I applied I actually got an email from Ottawa saying that I didn't make the the GPA cutoff. I had a 3.80, no joke. Not saying this to depress you, I just want you to understand that those of us who really want to become doctors, don't take no for an answer. We apply again, improve our GPA and do whatever needs to be done and eventually, we get in... somewhere 🙂 If you stick with it you will get in and become a doctor, I guarantee you that.

I applied this year to a few US schools and I can help you with which ones give Canadians a better chance. I did some research on the subject. So pm me if you want more details. Also, if you're not happy with your application, improve it. Get a graduate degree, bump up your GPA to 3.75-3.8, retake the MCAT and do some more volunteer work. If this is really what you want, it's not a big deal if it takes you a couple extra years.

Let me know if you need any help with your PS or AMCAS app. I'm always more then happy to help out a fellow Canadian.

 

[coffeebythelake]

I think your parents need to face reality, it seems they are preoccupied with the reputation of the school no doubt to tell others how their brilliant daughter got accepted to an Ivy League.

You don't need to go to a top tier school to become a good doctor or to get into a competitive specialization. Its about how hard you work. There are plenty of medical graduates from little known schools that end up matching into plastics, derm, and neurosurgery. Bottom line is, once you actually get into medical school, you probably won't care anymore... what matters is where you will go for your specialization. Its also silly to think of American medical schools as inferior in any sense, considering some Canadian medical schools have lower GPA and MCAT scores but ridiculously rigid OOP quotas. If I was an Albertan or Newfoundlander, I'm pretty sure I'd get in there.

Apply broadly and be happy you get accepted anywhere. Your parents should be happy for you too.

 

[philios]

like omg lets all get together and cry over how controlling our parents can be

*do what you love...f*ck the rest

 

[postbacker]

I suggest you show your parents some of the impressive match lists from non top 25 schools...your job is to get your parents to broaden their scope a bit...

 

[LexiLuthor]

She's legitimately asking for advice. Don't be an ass.

As for the advice: Apply to the MD school in Canada, as well as mid-tier and one or two top tier medical schools in the US. If you only get into mid-tier US medical schools then your parents will probably reconsider their decision not to help you with tuition. Also if they don't then you can just take out loans like everyone else.

Agreed.

A lot of people don't understand how hard it is to get into medical school, let alone a top school. My friends and family who don't know much about the process couldn't understand why I was freaking out, since they saw me as a "great" student- when compared to other applicants I was very average.

 

[omegaxx]

No, what I meant was my parents would not let me attend to a mid-tier school in US if I were to pay much greater tuition. I just want to become a great doctor, and I know that which school I go to is not the major factor for becoming one.

I think you need to talk to them about the reality of the situation. No offense intended, but your stats are not likely to get you anywhere in Canada especially since you are an Ontario resident. Unless you retake the MCAT Queens and UWO are going to just toss you in the rejected pile. As for UT and McMasters, their entrance GPA average is higher than 3.85. The OOP seats in other schools are quite limited, although the two Albertan schools are probably your safest bet. Still they put a large emphasis on the numbers and the pool just gets more competitive every year. Are you fluent in French? Because then you can try the Francophone schools with the smaller applicant pools.

Top 20 American schools are probably going to be a bit easier to get into than Ontario schools, but it's still an uphill fight.

Let me know how the talk turns out, and if you ever need a hand with the personal statement and AMCAS application.

 

[Yehosh]

Omega, how difficult is it to get into the western Canada schools, whould she have a better chance there then in Ontario? I applied only to Ontario and then US, so I'm curious about this

 

[bambielee]

Just looking at the bigger picture here, are you sure this is what you want to do? That's so important, because that's what distinguishes you from so many other people that may just put in the effort and time and get the great GPA's. There are so many students who go the med school route by default because they're smart academically but stupid because their parents pressure them with the "you're so smart, you have to go to med school" thing. Make sure this is what you want to do, first and foremost. Yes, the stat's are important, but the average GPA or MCAT to get into medical school is just that: an average. There are people who get into med school on both sides of that 3.6 (or whatever the average is). Keep your head up! 🙂

 

[QofQuimica]

I have been on this forum since last October, and am in the process of applying for 2008 entering class. I have read people's posts who have just awesome accomplishments and much better stats than mine. I am just feeling a bit unsure of myself these days after all those reading off SDN. I thought I'd make a great doctor, but after SDN, I don't even know if I am qualified to get accepted in a med school. I got into a fight with my parents last night because they want me to apply for only the top 25 schools or what-not. Otherwise, they won't let me go to a med school in the states. Getting into medschools in Canada is much harder, yet they do not realize this. I thought all I need to become a great doctor was MD degree from a decent school that would prepare me well for USMLE and for good residency program. I need to convince my parents, but it's just so hard. And at the same time, I am not so confident about my application anymore. I don't have stellar GPA. I didn't fly to Africa and hold a dying baby in my hand. I was working during school years and just trying to get by. I don't know. I am just frustrated.

Hon, all you can do is apply and see how things shake out. It's *way* premature to get yourself this worked up before you've even begun the process. You may get into some of the Canadian schools, and then all of this worry about tiers of American schools will be moot. Also, you should double-check and make sure that all of the American schools on your list accept foreign applicants. Many publically-funded schools will only take US permanent residents or citizens.

Can any of you helpful SDN folks tell the OP whether the UCs or any of the other schools on her list do not accept Canadians?

 

[jochi1543]

I suggest you show your parents some of the impressive match lists from non top 25 schools...your job is to get your parents to broaden their scope a bit...

I don't think it will change much because this STILL keeps the entire issue centered around prestige. What if the OP *gasp* doesn't WANT to go into derm? Some people actually WANT to be *just* family doctors, ob-gyns, or psychiatrists.

 

[jochi1543]

Omega, how difficult is it to get into the western Canada schools, whould she have a better chance there then in Ontario? I applied only to Ontario and then US, so I'm curious about this

Hmmm. Well, I think the deal with Western schools - I'm going to talk only about U of A and U of C, by the way, not UBC, which is extremely difficult to get into as an OOP (I remember someone from premed101 there had a 3.7 average and they explicitly told him that his GPA killed his OOP app) - is that they use a publicly posted algorithm to pick their OOP applicants. It's as simple as so many people with the highest combination of GPA, BS, and VR scores get an interview, so if you have high stats, you know you'll get an interview. The scores of interviewed applicants are made public, so if your score is more than 10 points below that of the last OOP applicant chosen for the interview last year, you know not to expect anything. So they have a pretty explicit ranking, which makes it easier for you to get a shot. Also, the fact that they use GPA (2 best years), AND VR and BS scores in the algorithm will give you a chance even if you have a weak VR OR not-so-great of a GPA as long as the other factors are good. Due to this, applicants with very high MCAT scores fare well at schools like U of C that take it seriously - while at UWO or Queens it's just used as a cut-off, and everyone above a 30 (with double digits in every section) is viewed the same, whether they had a 10-10-10 or 14-14-14.

 

[jochi1543]

Can any of you helpful SDN folks tell the OP whether the UCs or any of the other schools on her list do not accept Canadians?

Yes, they all do, at least on paper, but her list is very top-heavy...like, she couldn't stand a chance at UCLA even if she were a CA resident, for example. I don't remember whether it was UCSF or UCLA, but one of them has admitted only ONE Canadian in the last 12 years. I didn't even bother applying to the UCs, and my LizzyM is about the same as hers (slightly lower GPA, but higher MCAT).

It's good to have 2 or 3 extreme reaches on your list, IMO, just so you could tell yourself "Hey, at least I know I tried and didn't make it," but the absolute majority of schools you are applying to must be in your GPA/MCAT range, ESPECIALLY when coming to public schools. Just thinking logically - why would a public school accept not just an OOS, but an international w/ no ties to the state when they have a ton of in-state applicants with better stats?

 

[sle3pyguii]

You should apply to wherever you want including some top-25s. If you get accepted to schools, and none of them are top-25s, your parents can't really tell you to drop the acceptance and apply again. If you do get into a top-25 along with a different school, just show them the tuition you'll need to pay for the top schools.

It's hard to please asian parents (I am asian). Most just want to brag about their children, hence the brand name schools. I'm sure that once you graduate, they'll be more than happy to brag about the "Dr." in front of your name.

Good Luck.

 

[omegaxx]

Yes, they all do, at least on paper, but her list is very top-heavy...like, she couldn't stand a chance at UCLA even if she were a CA resident, for example. I don't remember whether it was UCSF or UCLA, but one of them has admitted only ONE Canadian in the last 12 years. I didn't even bother applying to the UCs, and my LizzyM is about the same as hers (slightly lower GPA, but higher MCAT).

It's good to have 2 or 3 extreme reaches on your list, IMO, just so you could tell yourself "Hey, at least I know I tried and didn't make it," but the absolute majority of schools you are applying to must be in your GPA/MCAT range, ESPECIALLY when coming to public schools. Just thinking logically - why would a public school accept not just an OOS, but an international w/ no ties to the state when they have a ton of in-state applicants with better stats?

It's UCSF that just accepted ONE Canadian in the last 12 years. It's my dream school, but I didn't bother applying.

With regards to UBC: before the interviews they give you a score out of 50, 25 academic score (evaluated based on your GPA + prerequisite averages) and 25 non-academic score (evluated based on your extracurriculars, where they give you points in different areas). MCAT and reference letters are all used post-interview as flags and tie-breakers. It's a very specific game you have to play with UBC, that's all I can say. PM me for more details.

 

[prmdbeach17]

Agreed.

A lot of people don't understand how hard it is to get into medical school, let alone a top school. My friends and family who don't know much about the process couldn't understand why I was freaking out, since they saw me as a "great" student- when compared to other applicants I was very average.

Agree with this. I was talking to one of my aunt's friends one day and she asked where I was thinking about going to med school. I said really, anywhere that would take me, half jokingly..she said aww you're smart, you'll get in anywhere. It's hard to get in anywhere let alone a top school. I also think my parents kind of love to say, yeah my daughter's going to med school...My mom's a nurse though so she understands how competitive it is.

 

[8744]

First I would recommend if you every hold a dying African baby that you use both hands. Nothing is more embarassing than fumbling a baby because you were trying to hotdog.

It's all in the grip. If you palm them, you can two-fist dying African babies and double your compassion.

It's not hot-dogging if you make it look natural. But if you're like, "Hey, look at me, I'm holding two of 'em!" it is.

 

[Doctor Bagel]

I don't think it will change much because this STILL keeps the entire issue centered around prestige. What if the OP *gasp* doesn't WANT to go into derm? Some people actually WANT to be *just* family doctors, ob-gyns, or psychiatrists.

But you don't have to take out loans for residency, so you're not asking for money then. Trick 'em upfront and act like derm or neurosurgery is the way to go, and then tell 'em 4th year that you want to FM. 😉 Or don't trick 'em, just don't tell.

The prestige issue is always going to be there for people like your father and the op's parents.

 

[Tenacity]

Good luck with apps! If I were to say anything, it is that your parents love you (even though they'd never express it), and that if you decide to go to medical school in a mid-tier school here, then they'll support you. I know I used to get a lot of fluff from my parents about not getting into a good undergrad, but they eventually gave in as I stayed stern.

 

[63768]

My mom's a nurse though so she understands how competitive it is.

see this would make it so much better for a lot of us if our parents knew the reality behind it all. personally, i had a ton of issues getting into med school because of the mistakes i had made in the past, things called growing up and becoming an adult. and of course, my parents think that going to a good university means it'll be easier for me to get into med school.

they found out the hard way as i got rejected over and over until i got into one school, which is not at all considered a top 25 school. oh well. lol.

and OP, have no fear. like drmom said, don't completely disregard your parents' opinions because that would be disrespecting them, but also be logical and candid about it all. apply to a few in the top 25 to show them that you're not ignoring them, and you never know, you may get interviewed and accepted. if you don't, no harm done and you'll have hopefully gotten into a mid-tier school. your parents will then have to choice of saying you're in med school or nothing at all, and i think that's an easy choice.

 

[Gut Shot]

your parents will then have to choice of saying you're in med school or nothing at all, and i think that's an easy choice.

If only it were always so. I am the acquaintance of a very nice Asian family. One of their daughters has applied to med school three times. On the third try she got one acceptance, but turned it down. Their explanation: the school was too far away. You could have knocked me over with a feather upon hearing that.

 

[Tenacity]

If only it were always so. I am the acquaintance of a very nice Asian family. One of their daughters has applied to med school three times. On the third try she got one acceptance, but turned it down. Their explanation: the school was too far away. You could have knocked me over with a feather upon hearing that.

And she'll never get into another medical school ever again.

 

[artaxerxes]

If only it were always so. I am the acquaintance of a very nice Asian family. One of their daughters has applied to med school three times. On the third try she got one acceptance, but turned it down. Their explanation: the school was too far away. You could have knocked me over with a feather upon hearing that.

probably wasn't a great school either, but I can understand, a lot of asian parents don't want their kids far away....and a lot of asian kids, especially girls, miss home😱 ? The thing is, I think most asian parents are ashamed to tells their asian friends that their kid is going to some mid tier school, like say crieghton. In her case, she should forget about medicine, thats what her parents should realize.

 

[63768]

If only it were always so. I am the acquaintance of a very nice Asian family. One of their daughters has applied to med school three times. On the third try she got one acceptance, but turned it down. Their explanation: the school was too far away. You could have knocked me over with a feather upon hearing that.

omg that is horrible. i feel sorry for that girl. hey i applied 3 times too and got accepted at TCOM (albeit through the postbac program). not the best school in the nation, not very well-known, but still i'm going to be a doctor.

you're right though. when i read your post, you could have knocked me over with a feather too. i was flabbergasted, if you will (best word ever). poor thing, she is going to have a much worse time getting into med school now.

 

[ProjectGemini]

I much appreciate everyone's post on my somewhat quater life crisis-like thread. After 4 days of silence, my mom finally phoned me. She was much more understanding this time (I guess the silent treatment always works), and she realizes that I have better chances at US schools than Canadian schools. I am still trying to come up with a good list of schools, and am planning to finalize the list once I get my MCAT score, which will be on June 27th. I once again thank everyone for the support and advices 🙂 I've felt much better after venting on SDN because this issue is something that can only be fully understood by other future doctors. 😀

 

[GreenShirt]

If only it were always so. I am the acquaintance of a very nice Asian family. One of their daughters has applied to med school three times. On the third try she got one acceptance, but turned it down. Their explanation: the school was too far away. You could have knocked me over with a feather upon hearing that.

It's likely their daughter didn't get in anywhere but they told that story to save face.

OP, It's frustrating to deal with parent's pride but you'll just have to learn to go in in spite of the pointless pressure they put on you. Parents in thier belief that they are waching out for your interests can actually be deterimental to your progress with their negativity. At this point there's nothing you can do but wait until this year's cycle is done. Maybe you'll get in where your parents want you to go and you won't have to worry. If you don't, then your parents will have to decide if they still want you to be a doctor or you'll have to find your own means for going to school. It may be easier said then done, but don't give yourself stomach ulcers over it now.

 

[Gut Shot]

It's likely their daughter didn't get in anywhere but they told that story to save face.

Perhaps, but I think it's more likely that the school was beneath the destiny they have in mind for their daughter.

It's admittedly difficult for anyone outside the profession to understand medical education in this country. After all, how could and education from Harvard Med in any way compare to some no name state school? Right? It's tough to "get," but undergraduate medical education is incredibly standardized. We succeed and fail on our merits, not by the names on our diplomas. Virtually nobody in my residency program has any idea where anyone else even went to med school.

 

[anon-y-mouse]

Ouch. I'm sorry - doesn't sound like fun. 🙁

What I was talking about with the "Asian culture" bit was not referring to the OP's parents' emphasis on prestige and reputation. I was talking about the "cutting the apron strings" part.

Asian families emphasize the importance of the GROUP over the INDIVIDUAL, so it's not surprising to me that the OP is so concerned about what her parents think/want. A lot of Asian parents really seem to believe in the idea that the everyone swims or sinks together, so it's "irresponsible" for someone to go off and do their own thing without asking the group's opinion. I could never say to my parents "I'm doing this for MYSELF, so f!ck off" because of this. I'm probably not explaining it very well, but yeah - that's our culture. (sigh)

Can someone elaborate on this "group" concept? I don't know anything about Asian households. Is it more like the parents' reputation is also on the line?