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WhtsThFrequency said:
Definitely consider some on-going support system - take it from someone who did almost burn out in third year from constant overwork. Doesn't even have to be specific one-on-one therapy, could be a group thing. Or heck, even something less formal -->
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What everyone else has said, @SandstormDVM . I hit lots of bumps then really hit a wall during clinics (right when I took boards take #1). Support systems and self-care are essential. I honestly would not be alive if that weren't the case. :biglove: My PMbox is always open. For everyone.
 
THANK YOU, everyone. I freaking love this place. Sorry that I'm just now responding; drove home this morning. 🙂

WTF, I had a very similar childhood (right down to the being bullied and loving dinosaurs and Magic bit). I'd like to think that I've toughened up a lot more, but I still find it difficult to open myself up to anyone who isn't super close to me and I have the most difficult time standing up for myself. I'm the roommate who will ask a million times to make sure that it's REALLY ok for me to watch Netflix without headphones because I do not like being a bother, and even then I will do it with super low volume. I do enjoy working with people but I think I come off as standoffish because I don't generally like conservation just for conversation's sake (small talk is the worst). It's gotten better over the five years of undergrad and the start of vet school, but it's still very much a work in progress. I worked during most of undergrad in restaurant management and customer service so I'd like to think that I've acquired some thicker skin... but I can also mentally separate work and home life. It's one thing to be trodden on and cursed at at school or work; it's another entirely to have two people you've never seen in your life do it right outside your bedroom door in the place that you go to specifically to relax and forget the stresses of the day.

I've never heard of that book but I might have to check it out! And, yeah, when I get back to school next week I'm going to see about talking with a counselor. For sure.

Seriously, guys. Thanks for all of the kind words and open PM inboxes. I appreciate it so much. 😍
 
Cats are not second class citizens, and even though they don't show they hurt as readily as dogs, they deserve adequate pain control when we do painful things to them. And surgical support/monitoring.

I'm rather grumpy that I have to have this conversation with licensed vets. But at least happy that they listen and are open to doing better.
 
Trilt said:
Cats are not second class citizens, and even though they don't show they hurt as readily as dogs, they deserve adequate pain control when we do painful things to them. And surgical support/monitoring.

I'm rather grumpy that I have to have this conversation with licensed vets. But at least happy that they listen and are open to doing better.
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this is one of my pet peeves, too.
 
My dad doesn't sleep talk, he sleep screams. He often sounds very angry or panicked. Last night his screaming went on for a really long time. I asked him before to talk to his doctor about it (I'm not sure there is anything they can do, but I can hope), but his reply was "why? It doesn't bother me." Totally ignoring that it does affect the other three people living in the house. Last night I almost wanted to go down stairs where he sleeps and make a really loud noise to wake him up so it stopped, but I didn't want to get out of bed. I began dreaming up ways to wake him without getting up. I wish there was a bracelet he could wear that would zap him when it happened, or my mom or I could press a button that would zap him. It only seems fair that if he startles us awake that we should be able to shock him awake.
 
dyachei said:
this is one of my pet peeves, too.
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This is the first thing that has genuinely upset me at my practice. I knew I was going someplace that didn't have the best anesthetic protocols on the planet, and part of what made me like the clinic is that the owner is not only open to changing things, he actively wants to and has been constantly asking for my opinion on things (actually asking well before I'm truly willing to say too much, lol).

I guess I just consider myself fairly practical, and I know we're fairly rural and it's not the teaching hospital and yada yada yada... but I don't like feeling like I've done a disservice to patients. And I don't understand why cats get the ****ing short end of the stick when good pain control is not expensive and we do all these things for dogs all day long.

Ugh. Gonna snuggle my cats.
 
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Jilary said:
My dad doesn't sleep talk, he sleep screams. He often sounds very angry or panicked. Last night his screaming went on for a really long time. I asked him before to talk to his doctor about it (I'm not sure there is anything they can do, but I can hope), but his reply was "why? It doesn't bother me." Totally ignoring that it does affect the other three people living in the house. Last night I almost wanted to go down stairs where he sleeps and make a really loud noise to wake him up so it stopped, but I didn't want to get out of bed. I began dreaming up ways to wake him without getting up. I wish there was a bracelet he could wear that would zap him when it happened, or my mom or I could press a button that would zap him. It only seems fair that if he startles us awake that we should be able to shock him awake.
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Maybe put a shock collar on his foot? set on low, of course.... 😛
 
Jilary said:
My dad doesn't sleep talk, he sleep screams. He often sounds very angry or panicked. Last night his screaming went on for a really long time. I asked him before to talk to his doctor about it (I'm not sure there is anything they can do, but I can hope), but his reply was "why? It doesn't bother me." Totally ignoring that it does affect the other three people living in the house. Last night I almost wanted to go down stairs where he sleeps and make a really loud noise to wake him up so it stopped, but I didn't want to get out of bed. I began dreaming up ways to wake him without getting up. I wish there was a bracelet he could wear that would zap him when it happened, or my mom or I could press a button that would zap him. It only seems fair that if he startles us awake that we should be able to shock him awake.
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Seems like a good use for a bark collar... 😛
 
SandstormDVM said:
Ugh. Screw today, seriously. The stress and feelings of inadequacy have been piling up pretty much since school started but today it's culminated past my breaking point. Left anatomy lab feeling the tears well up, but they didn't start spilling over until two girls I've never seen before (assuming they're friends of the roommate, who was nowhere in sight) in my apartment decided to laugh and make stupid, petty, insulting comments about me right outside my bedroom door... in that typical snobby undergrad way. I say hi and introduce myself to try to be nice, even though you don't do the same, and that's what I get? It's a comparatively small deal and it normally wouldn't have bothered me much, but with all of the school stuff on top, it sent me over the edge. And I feel all the more pathetic for it because we're only TWO weeks in.

I'm admittedly a bit overly sensitive anyway, but I don't understand why people can't just be nice to each other. I feel like I'm having a difficult enough time making friends and feeling comfortable here; that crap just makes it so much worse. 🙁

Oh, and I'm sick. There's that, too.

At least I'm going home tomorrow for the long weekend...
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I had a very similar experience my first month of vet school. It sucks, and it makes you feel horrible, but then you realize they are the immature ones. You find new and better friends and it gets better. Lots better. 🙂 I'm sorry you had to deal with people like that. Feel free to pm or fb message me anytime.
 
Yikes. Sounds like bad decisions have been made all around.
 
SandstormDVM said:
THANK YOU, everyone. I freaking love this place. Sorry that I'm just now responding; drove home this morning. 🙂

WTF, I had a very similar childhood (right down to the being bullied and loving dinosaurs and Magic bit). I'd like to think that I've toughened up a lot more, but I still find it difficult to open myself up to anyone who isn't super close to me and I have the most difficult time standing up for myself. I'm the roommate who will ask a million times to make sure that it's REALLY ok for me to watch Netflix without headphones because I do not like being a bother, and even then I will do it with super low volume. I do enjoy working with people but I think I come off as standoffish because I don't generally like conservation just for conversation's sake (small talk is the worst). It's gotten better over the five years of undergrad and the start of vet school, but it's still very much a work in progress. I worked during most of undergrad in restaurant management and customer service so I'd like to think that I've acquired some thicker skin... but I can also mentally separate work and home life. It's one thing to be trodden on and cursed at at school or work; it's another entirely to have two people you've never seen in your life do it right outside your bedroom door in the place that you go to specifically to relax and forget the stresses of the day.

I've never heard of that book but I might have to check it out! And, yeah, when I get back to school next week I'm going to see about talking with a counselor. For sure.

Seriously, guys. Thanks for all of the kind words and open PM inboxes. I appreciate it so much. 😍
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All of us have our back stories so understand more than you know even if our stories vary. I left for a while and found my way back here because the community is amazing.

I will throw my name in the ring if you need anyone to talk to 🙂
 
@PrincessButterCup The whole situation is just so majorly crappy. I feel so bad for your co-worker, but at the same time it sound like she made the situation SO much worse.
 
That little hurricane seriously messed things up around here. I've been without power since Thursday night 🙁 So glad I got all my applications submitted last week!
 
Thanks guys. It's hard to wrap my head around how completely screwed up this all is. I was taking to my brother, and he didn't really understand why it was such a big deal or why it was stressful. I don't think ex-coworker really understood until she talked to our other doctor yesterday and it finally hit her how much she'd hurt herself. She was threatening to bring a law suit against boss lady, but she really has no case. I don't know how everything will turn out but I'm so done with it all.
 
I'm a little bit paranoid that she'll find this site if she doesn't know about it already and my posting things here will create more drama. I know it's not likely, but 🙄
 
PrincessButterCup said:
She was threatening to bring a law suit against boss lady, but she really has no case
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The only part I was wondering about was libel. But since she shouldn't have known the contents and what the response was...

I can edit all this out in a little bit.
 
LadyOtheFarm said:
The only part I was wondering about was libel. But since she shouldn't have known the contents and what the response was...

I can edit all this out in a little bit.
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Exactly. On VMCAS she waived her right to know what was in the evaluation, so she should never have seen it. Everything was handled so poorly.
 
PrincessButterCup said:
Exactly. On VMCAS she waived her right to know what was in the evaluation, so she should never have seen it. Everything was handled so poorly.
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Even if you don't waive your right I don't think you get to see it until after the cycle is over
 
PrincessButterCup said:
Exactly. On VMCAS she waived her right to know what was in the evaluation, so she should never have seen it. Everything was handled so poorly.
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Honestly your boss should have never agreed to write a letter for ex-coworker with the intention of writing something bad. It is a really crappy thing to do to someone. If she couldn't write her a good letter she should have declined. Of course none of this excuses your ex-coworkers behavior either... Were your boss and ex-coworker on good terms...I just can't imagine?
 
I had an evaluator hand me a copy of my recommendation letter in an envelope "for me to deliver by hand."
I tried to bring it to the school, figuring what the hell, I'm not supposed to have this anyway, but of course they didn't want it.
I left it in my car and either the kid or dog ripped it open a few months later. Of course I read it. It was complementary, but pretty darn generic. From how excited she sounded about writing it, I had expected more... but can't really say anything. I just didn't use her the next year.
 
LadyOtheFarm said:
I had an evaluator hand me a copy of my recommendation letter in an envelope "for me to deliver by hand."
I tried to bring it to the school, figuring what the hell, I'm not supposed to have this anyway, but of course they didn't want it.
I left it in my car and either the kid or dog ripped it open a few months later. Of course I read it. It was complementary, but pretty darn generic. From how excited she sounded about writing it, I had expected more... but can't really say anything. I just didn't use her the next year.
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To be fair, writing a good, unique letter if recommendation is actually pretty hard. It's almost like writing a personal statement. I've written maybe four or five thus far for former undergrad research assistants of mine (not just for vet school but other things like MPH/grad school) and it's getting easier, but it's still not as easy as people think.
 
mmmdreamerz said:
Honestly your boss should have never agreed to write a letter for ex-coworker with the intention of writing something bad. It is a really crappy thing to do to someone. If she couldn't write her a good letter she should have declined. Of course none of this excuses your ex-coworkers behavior either... Were your boss and ex-coworker on good terms...I just can't imagine?
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They were never on good terms. Coworker has an abrasive know-it-all personality and it took me a long time to get used her. She would talk about how many veterinarians she knew from tech school, and how cool they were, and how they liked her so much, so I never understood why she asked boss lady. Her relationship with boss lady was always strained, from the very beginning, and it just got worse when she left for a job at another clinic. She was uneasy about asking her and I assume that her relationships with those other vets really wasn't as strong as she claimed, otherwise she would have asked them instead. Boss lady doesn't hide it when she's unhappy with someone. Coworker knew the letter wouldn't be a glowing recommendation. Even I never thought it would be so negative, though. Ugh.
 
WhtsThFrequency said:
To be fair, writing a good, unique letter if recommendation is actually pretty hard. It's almost like writing a personal statement. I've written maybe four or five thus far for former undergrad research assistants of mine (not just for vet school but other things like MPH/grad school) and it's getting easier, but it's still not as easy as people think.
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I had expected more only because she spoke in much more descriptive and personalized terms when she talked about what she was planning to write. It went from :"This is a woman I go to when I cannot remember something about endocrinology and repro and blah, blah blah, and she is wonderful with clients and training volunteers and vet students and interns..." and using personal anecdotes as examples to: "She is very intelligent, and a quick learner and I would be proud to have her as a colleague."

Still good, but, not as personal and over the top with excitement for me to go as what she told me she planned. I don't know. I'm sure there was more to the decision than just me. I know she also got asked by like 4 other people, so maybe she just ran out of time too.
 
Gwenevre said:
Mr. Gwen doesn't want me to adopt this cat. Darn significant others
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He's all
"You don't need a dog"
"You don't have time for a dog"
"You don't have space for a dog"
"I don't want to deal with a new, unestablished pet when I move in"
"Dogs are expensive"
"Get through the first year of vet school at least and then we'll talk about it"

If I'm gonna take care of the dog I don't see why I need his approval :yeahright:

Caiter92 said:
DTMFA
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🤣
 
Did I send in an adoption application anyway?

Yes. Yes I did. :whistle:

I have a feeling this particular rescue is one of the super strict ones and my application will be denied anyway. I'll probably get my dog fix through fostering.
 
So many of my classmates have dogs and it's making me want one so bad! It's only been a month since our dog passed and I still miss her like crazy, so that's probably part of it, too. I couldn't have one with the old lady cats, and I don't know if this building allows dogs, but that hasn't stopped me from looking at petfinder sometimes :whistle:
 
Caiter92 said:
So many of my classmates have dogs and it's making me want one so bad! It's only been a month since our dog passed and I still miss her like crazy, so that's probably part of it, too. I couldn't have one with the old lady cats, and I don't know if this building allows dogs, but that hasn't stopped me from looking at petfinder sometimes :whistle:
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Did I mention I'm looking at a german shepherd and my building doesn't allow dogs over 50 lbs or "aggressive" breeds? Plus there is a 2 pet policy and I already have 2 cats? Heh.
 
SandstormDVM said:
Thank you so very much for the words of encouragement, everyone! I love this community and you all really are so, so sweet and kind. :biglove:

I cried in the bathroom for a while but then went out for a short run. I feel quite a bit better already! I'm really hoping having a four-day weekend helps me recharge and recuperate.

In retrospect, I think I probably should have waited another year before applying. I suspect that I was dangerously close to burnout towards the end of undergrad. Last VMCAS cycle was kind of a "test run" as I sincerely believed that there was virtually zero chance of me being admitted anywhere with my crummy GPA--lo and behold, I recieved no rejections. I never could have imagined this happening. I mean, I was the girl who attempted suicide her senior year of high school because I was close to failing out and not recieving a diploma; I thought I had no future (obviously now I see that there are alternative routes, but 18-year-olds aren't usually the most forward-thinking). I thought that there was no way I could ever get into college or find a halfway decent job... and now I'm in vet school! Craziness.

I guess I just have to remind myself that of the 1000ish applications my school recieved, and the 350ish interviewed, I somehow managed to stand out and that I am here because the school truly believes that I CAN make it.

I am happy--and grateful--to be here. That's why my feeling the way that I do frustrates me so much.
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Hey Sandstorm,
Don't hesitate to reach out to your second-year contact when you're feeling stuck. Or feel free to PM me and I'd be happy to talk strategy for studying for the various classes (via PM or over a drink sometime). I KNOW how overwhelming this all feels, and figuring out interpersonal relationships with 120 new people makes it even harder (and having to deal with petty behavior on top of it all, ugh). You can do it. As I'm hoping they told you when you started school here- they would not have admitted you if they didn't KNOW you were capable. You are going to do things this year you never thought possible. And you're going to come out the other side with basically a superhero cape.
 
WildZoo said:
Did I mention I'm looking at a german shepherd and my building doesn't allow dogs over 50 lbs or "aggressive" breeds? Plus there is a 2 pet policy and I already have 2 cats? Heh.
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Ha, my management company doesn't allow "aggressive" breeds either, and all of the dogs I'm falling for are breeds they don't allow. We're really good at this planning thing 😛
 
Caiter92 said:
Ha, my management company doesn't allow "aggressive" breeds either, and all of the dogs I'm falling for are breeds they don't allow. We're really good at this planning thing 😛
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There is one apartment complex I know of in the area that doesn't have breed restrictions, and they didn't have any availability when I was looking. This breed discrimination drives me up the wall...especially when I love big scary dogs 😛
 
I'm looking for a post where I complained about cramps... for science.... I thought it was this thread, but search says no.

Anybody with super skills?
 
WildZoo said:
There is one apartment complex I know of in the area that doesn't have breed restrictions, and they didn't have any availability when I was looking. This breed discrimination drives me up the wall...especially when I love big scary dogs 😛
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Big dogs are the best! and I know, it's so annoying. The only people I know with pitties and the like had to go with private land lords and had a hell of a time finding housing :/
 
The other night, my dog went into my roommate's bedroom when she had gone into the kitchen. I called him from the living room, but he didn't answer, so I went in after him.

Turns out my roommate had a brownie on her bookshelf, and he helped himself to it. :smack: So I had to make him vomit. Thanks, buddy.

I baked a pan of brownies the next day to share with my roommate as recompense for my dog's thievery. Bad dog. :nono:
 
Not so much a rant... More of a sad post, but I don't really know where to put it. So my day just took kind of a bad turn. Called my mom tonight, and on the phone my mom told me that my grandma's (mom's mom) breast cancer has returned and she now has to have surgery next week to remove the tumor, and then do five weeks of radiation. Last time it was super successful and she was in remission for 17 years so they think it will be okay since they caught it so early. I am extremely close to her though, and cannot even imagine losing her.

Now, about ten minutes ago my mom called back to say that she just got a phone call that my other grandma (dad's stepmom) is now in hospice and is probably going to pass away this week. I was never super close with her, but it still makes me sad, especially since I won't be able to go home for the funeral.

Hug your families guys. Time goes quick.
 
alohacat319 said:
Not so much a rant... More of a sad post, but I don't really know where to put it. So my day just took kind of a bad turn. Called my mom tonight, and on the phone my mom told me that my grandma's (mom's mom) breast cancer has returned and she now has to have surgery next week to remove the tumor, and then do five weeks of radiation. Last time it was super successful and she was in remission for 17 years so they think it will be okay since they caught it so early. I am extremely close to her though, and cannot even imagine losing her.

Now, about ten minutes ago my mom called back to say that she just got a phone call that my other grandma (dad's stepmom) is now in hospice and is probably going to pass away this week. I was never super close with her, but it still makes me sad, especially since I won't be able to go home for the funeral.

Hug your families guys. Time goes quick.
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Sorry to hear. Time does go fast. Gotta keep that in mind when you feel overwhelmed and take some time to reflect and take care of yourself. hugs.
 
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