RANT HERE thread

[BlueFeetBooby7]

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I was an OG on both Facebook and Myspace and can reflect on how badly it affected me throughout middle school/high school. The bullying on Myspace in particular was relentless. We were truly obsessed - Facebook was the first thing we all did when we got home from school. The goal was to be friends with as many people as possible, even if you didn't actually know them. I was a normal 13 year old with normal teen angst until social media took over, lol. I don't post a ton on anything, mostly pictures at that. I consume a lottt of TikTok though so have decided to delete it and not look back. I'd rather play Animal Crossing in bed than scroll on TikTok, lol.

Although I wasn't necessarily surprised, I was kinda grossed out by the number of people I saw recording themselves doing dances in front of important landmarks in Japan. I guess even though I grew up with social media, I still don't understand the drive behind the constant recording of yourself. I never want to be in front of the camera, but maybe that's what the early years of social media have done to me

I think it's just an Asian culture/trend to dance in front of landmarks 🙂 I'm not against them but also I don't watch them either.
I play Splatoon and Zelda games and sometimes they make me more irritated than social media because I am too competitive when play video games lolllll but I still love them.

 

[pp9]

I think it's just an Asian culture/trend to dance in front of landmarks 🙂 I'm not against them but also I don't watch them either.
I play Splatoon and Zelda games and sometimes they make me more irritated than social media because I am too competitive when play video games lolllll but I still love them.

They weren't Asian, though. I'd say 90% tourists. And either way, I still don't get it

 

[BlueFeetBooby7]

They weren't Asian, though. I'd say 90% tourists. And either way, I still don't get it

I just realized I typed a colon: and ) as a smiley face like this : ) in my original message and it turned into that sarcastic yellow emoji face which is not what I intended to type!

 

[alyssa13]

SAME. I gotta know when rep is coming out, and if/when she releases a cardigan for it. I haven't gotten one yet in hopes that a rep one would be amazing. I almost went for the TTPD one because it was very wearable.

OMG ME TOO! the one social media i use most is twitter because i have a taylor/fangirl account haha. I have 6 of her cardigans and ive just been waiting for an evermore one she NEEDS to release one at some point

 

[pp9]

OMG ME TOO! the one social media i use most is twitter because i have a taylor/fangirl account haha. I have 6 of her cardigans and ive just been waiting for an evermore one she NEEDS to release one at some point

I've had a hard time justifying the $70, although I've wanted all of them. I have a coffee mug and thermos that I use all the time, a blanket that I use daily (best Christmas present ever), coasters, and some ornaments. I've been really focused on reducing my consumerism habits in the past 1-2 years and not owning 100 cardigans I'd never wear was part of that Also nabbed an autographed TTPD cd and got it into a nice frame (they sent me two actually, the first was lost in the mail for months and eventually showed up. I don't know what to do with the second, lol).

 

[_rae_]

I think it's just an Asian culture/trend to dance in front of landmarks 🙂 I'm not against them but also I don't watch them either.
I play Splatoon and Zelda games and sometimes they make me more irritated than social media because I am too competitive when play video games lolllll but I still love them.

Listen I love Zelda but Tears of the Kingdom is kiiiiiilllling me. The angry gamer boy rage gets turned up real high by some of these bosses. I'm a mild to moderately skilled video game player and sometimes I don't want to fight I just want to explore and do puzzles.

 

[DVM882029]

SAME. I gotta know when rep is coming out, and if/when she releases a cardigan for it. I haven't gotten one yet in hopes that a rep one would be amazing. I almost went for the TTPD one because it was very wearable.

OMG ME TOO! the one social media i use most is twitter because i have a taylor/fangirl account haha. I have 6 of her cardigans and ive just been waiting for an evermore one she NEEDS to release one at some point

I've had a hard time justifying the $70, although I've wanted all of them. I have a coffee mug and thermos that I use all the time, a blanket that I use daily (best Christmas present ever), coasters, and some ornaments. I've been really focused on reducing my consumerism habits in the past 1-2 years and not owning 100 cardigans I'd never wear was part of that Also nabbed an autographed TTPD cd and got it into a nice frame (they sent me two actually, the first was lost in the mail for months and eventually showed up. I don't know what to do with the second, lol).

I think she's releasing Debut next, based on the fact that she announced for Country album at the Grammys... But I'll keep clowning.

I just framed my Eras Tour poster from the Miami dates, cant wait to put it up!

 

[BlueFeetBooby7]

Listen I love Zelda but Tears of the Kingdom is kiiiiiilllling me. The angry gamer boy rage gets turned up real high by some of these bosses. I'm a mild to moderately skilled video game player and sometimes I don't want to fight I just want to explore and do puzzles.

I feel you. I got so angry at Phantom Ganon and I was screaming "he's CHEATING!!!" I get away with those mushrooms that make you freaking strong.

 

[SkiOtter]

SAME. I gotta know when rep is coming out, and if/when she releases a cardigan for it. I haven't gotten one yet in hopes that a rep one would be amazing. I almost went for the TTPD one because it was very wearable.

I just got the Lover cardigan as my first one 😂 PINK HEARTS? Say less.

 

[SkiOtter]

I don't know what to do with the second, lol

I know @cdo96 was trying her hardest to get a signed TTPD and kept missing the drops if you’re wanting to sell it 😂

 

[pp9]

I know @cdo96 was trying her hardest to get a signed TTPD and kept missing the drops if you’re wanting to sell it 😂

@cdo96 DM me if you're still looking! It's literally just sitting in a drawer and I'll sell it to you at cost + shipping

I feel you. I got so angry at Phantom Ganon and I was screaming "he's CHEATING!!!" I get away with those mushrooms that make you freaking strong.

I haven't played the Switch games yet (we just got our Switches on our trip, my husband is playing Zelda now) but good to know Ganon is still a little bitch. He was my arch nemesis when I was 7 and playing OOT lol

 

[battie]

Do we need a gaming thread too 👀

 

[_rae_]

Do we need a gaming thread too 👀

Yeeeeeees

 

[vampyrica]

Do we need a gaming thread too 👀

PLEASE OMG!!! I NEED TO CONNECT WITH FELLOW STARDEW ENTHUSIASTS!

 

[katiemcat]

Stardew is so timeless

 

[_rae_]

I haven't played the Switch games yet (we just got our Switches on our trip, my husband is playing Zelda now) but good to know Ganon is still a little bitch. He was my arch nemesis when I was 7 and playing OOT lol

LOVED Breath of the Wild. My complaint with Tears of the Kingdom is it's literally the same game with an expanded map. Still love it, just wish there was a *bit* more originality to the story. They literally reused battles it felt like.

 

[katiemcat]

I know someone on here plays fire emblem with a Dimitri pfp where are you brother

 

[cdo96]

I know @cdo96 was trying her hardest to get a signed TTPD and kept missing the drops if you’re wanting to sell it 😂

@cdo96 DM me if you're still looking! It's literally just sitting in a drawer and I'll sell it to you at cost + shipping

OH MY GOD YES. I WANT THIS

 

[cdo96]

OMG ME TOO! the one social media i use most is twitter because i have a taylor/fangirl account haha. I have 6 of her cardigans and ive just been waiting for an evermore one she NEEDS to release one at some point

I've had a hard time justifying the $70, although I've wanted all of them. I have a coffee mug and thermos that I use all the time, a blanket that I use daily (best Christmas present ever), coasters, and some ornaments. I've been really focused on reducing my consumerism habits in the past 1-2 years and not owning 100 cardigans I'd never wear was part of that Also nabbed an autographed TTPD cd and got it into a nice frame (they sent me two actually, the first was lost in the mail for months and eventually showed up. I don't know what to do with the second, lol).

I have a couple of the cardigans and wear them all the time. I have the folklore, speak now, midnights, and lover cardigan and alternate through them all

 

[SkiOtter]

OH MY GOD YES. I WANT THIS

I knew you would be very interested 😂😂😂

 

[overcastkidjuno]

I know someone on here plays fire emblem with a Dimitri pfp where are you brother

@Viscernable

 

[battie]

Is anyone worried about the future of GRAD plus loans?? There was a bill introduced a few days ago (S. 308 by sen Tuberville) that seeks to eliminate grad plus and these loans are the only way I could afford vet school. I'm worried because Republicans control all three branches so conceivably they could pass this....could a filibuster stop it? Does anyone have any wisdom on this or how on earth school could be afforded if they go away these next 4 years?

No, no wisdom, but just standing here with you, knowing we will figure it out together.

Idk, it’s scaring me and I truly have moments where I’m absolutely terrified (okay that’s always right now) that student loans will go away in some major capacity in the next few years.

I don’t have an answer. Other than, we can get together to scream into the abyss, I’ll bring the brownies.

Edited to add - this isn’t meant to be toxic positivity, just seeing you and supporting you - I’m scared and angry and terrified in 15 different ways….. all I know is, I’m going to control what I can, resist how I can, and support those in my community.

I'm in the same boat!

I would be happy to be a plaintiff! I'm pretty ragey, I'll be a pain in the arse to the Cantaloupe Caligula.

When student loans and repayment plans are under attack but obviously every school still increases their tuition and fees every year. Where does it end? How much more UNAFFORDABLE can some of these places get? It’s off the charts in my opinion and how can anyone commit to these programs with a sound mind right now? I’m rethinking my journey all together because of these imminent threats to my ability to repay what I end up borrowing.

Listen, I'm not saying schools are exempt from blame, but having been very close with the president of my undergrad college, it's not black and white. What colleges provide today vs. what they provided twenty or thirty years ago is increasingly expensive. Do I think $50k/yr is reasonable for someone in their late teens/early 20s to pay? No, it's ridiculous. Do I think there's aspects of that that are truly non-negotiable because of continued decreases in funding from the government, higher demand from students, and higher demand from the economy/employees? Absolutely.

The cost of school is inflated and egregious in most cases, but it's not all "the school is greedy". They're businesses whether they're for profit or not and they are hit by the economy ups and downs just like an individual.

Battie is right though, the chances this is going to completely fall apart this year or even during our education is low, thanks in part to the Congressional Budget and Impoundment Control Act of 1974. And even if it does, we have to assume that business as usual will occur, someone else will be in office in the next 4 years, and something new will be put in place.

It's hard, as a current first year, to separate my anxiety from what I realistically know. I can't imagine being an incoming student with all of the anxieties of starting a rigorous program with these added complications. But do know that the terrible and wonderful thing about policy is, no matter what the media tells you, it takes a long time.

Just quoting a bunch of people with the discussion of the potential loss of the Grad PLUS loan. Right now the SPF take is that its a "we'll see" situation, since, yeah, technically getting rid of it would take an act of Congress and then go through the court system. Likewise, the other thought is that higher education would be a bad financial investment regardless of career goal if federal loans went away.

I also want to emphasize @_rae_ 's point that part of the problem is the expectations on schools by society as a whole, particularly "luxury" items. Here's a great YouTube video from *forever* ago that is a bit dated now, but has good points.

 

[breezywonton]

got waitlisted at my instate (tOSU). #20. feeling really really disappointed 🙁 i have offers elsewhere but it still sucks. i feel like i’ve let down all my friends, family, and mentors because they all expected me to go there. even when i got accepted to other places they were all like “ok, so what about ohio?”. sigh… i guess everything happens for a reason, right?

 

[vampyrica]

got waitlisted at my instate (tOSU). #20. feeling really really disappointed 🙁 i have offers elsewhere but it still sucks. i feel like i’ve let down all my friends, family, and mentors because they all expected me to go there. even when i got accepted to other places they were all like “ok, so what about ohio?”. sigh… i guess everything happens for a reason, right?

I'm so sorry breezy. Everything will fall into place. This could be your blessing in disguise! I was rejected two years in a row now from my IS, no interview, just straight rejection. I ended up getting accepted to my dream school in my dream program, something a manifested and hoped and prayed and wished for for years. tOSU might have been that school for you, but everything happens for a reason, you are so so right. This could be your opportunity to move somewhere new! Meet someone you never expected to meet! It's okay to be sad, it's okay to feel dissapointed regardless of having other offers. Having offers at other schools doesn't make rejection sting any less than it does. Feel all the feels, have a drink, eat some ice cream and tomorrow, start fresh! Now you have the incredible opportunity to research and look into where you will be heading on your next big adventure! Wishing you the best, always <3

 

[breezywonton]

I'm so sorry breezy. Everything will fall into place. This could be your blessing in disguise! I was rejected two years in a row now from my IS, no interview, just straight rejection. I ended up getting accepted to my dream school in my dream program, something a manifested and hoped and prayed and wished for for years. tOSU might have been that school for you, but everything happens for a reason, you are so so right. This could be your opportunity to move somewhere new! Meet someone you never expected to meet! It's okay to be sad, it's okay to feel dissapointed regardless of having other offers. Having offers at other schools doesn't make rejection sting any less than it does. Feel all the feels, have a drink, eat some ice cream and tomorrow, start fresh! Now you have the incredible opportunity to research and look into where you will be heading on your next big adventure! Wishing you the best, always <3

thank you so much for that 🥹🥹 i feel guilty for being upset, some people are saying i shouldn’t be upset because i’ve been accepted other places. but tOSU has been my dream since high school, so yea i’m gonna be disappointed. rejection is redirection! congrats on your offer to CSU!! 🫶🫶

 

[vampyrica]

thank you so much for that 🥹🥹 i feel guilty for being upset, some people are saying i shouldn’t be upset because i’ve been accepted other places. but tOSU has been my dream since high school, so yea i’m gonna be disappointed. rejection is redirection! congrats on your offer to CSU!! 🫶🫶

I understand. You have every right to be upset, ignore those who are saying you shouldn't be. 🫶 How exciting is it that you have so many wonderful options, so many new friends, peers and mentors to meet. At the end of the day, you'll still be Dr.Breezywonton c: (also thank you <3)

 

[miniaturedove]

thank you so much for that 🥹🥹 i feel guilty for being upset, some people are saying i shouldn’t be upset because i’ve been accepted other places. but tOSU has been my dream since high school, so yea i’m gonna be disappointed. rejection is redirection! congrats on your offer to CSU!! 🫶🫶

not much to add other than it is so valid to be disappointed, to rant and vent, and all of the things. just because you have acceptances in hand doesn't mean people are allowed to minimize your feelings

 

[breezywonton]

I understand. You have every right to be upset, ignore those who are saying you shouldn't be. 🫶 How exciting is it that you have so many wonderful options, so many new friends, peers and mentors to meet. At the end of the day, you'll still be Dr.Breezywonton c: (also thank you <3)

not much to add other than it is so valid to be disappointed, to rant and vent, and all of the things. just because you have acceptances in hand doesn't mean people are allowed to minimize your feelings

thanks yall <3 SDN really has helped me a lot!! i appreciate the kind words! onward and upward!!

 

[cdo96]

god I’m so feking tired of being a resident

 

[_rae_]

Does anyone have any experiences they're willing to share about moving with partners/boyfriends, girlfriends / spouses for vet school? I've had a mini-conversation with my boyfriend about thinking VERY hard on whether he wants to move across the country with me for vet school (we've been living together 3 years). So far he's been excited and understanding over it, and we're ending our current lease and living apart with respective families over the summer to save money, but there's a part of me that feels like the whole situation is like Bambi before their parents get shot. Not to mention I found out he still looks up on an ex like, religiously? I just wonder if the relationship drama with vet school is worth dealing with.

Together 9.5 years, lived together 3, engaged 1.5, married last month. Feel free to DM me!

 

[DVM882029]

Does anyone have any experiences they're willing to share about moving with partners/boyfriends, girlfriends / spouses for vet school? I've had a mini-conversation with my boyfriend about thinking VERY hard on whether he wants to move across the country with me for vet school (we've been living together 3 years). So far he's been excited and understanding over it, and we're ending our current lease and living apart with respective families over the summer to save money, but there's a part of me that feels like the whole situation is like Bambi before their parents get shot. Not to mention I found out he still looks up on an ex like, religiously? I just wonder if the relationship drama with vet school is worth dealing with.

Non-trad, and married, so might not be super helpful or what you're looking for. Together 6 years, married almost 2 years. We'll be splitting time as, luckily, the DVM program is within driving distance (~90m) to our current home. We'll just split time between this house and an apartment near the school, as he'll still be working near our main house. Gonna be weird, gonna be a little messy, but it's just part of the adventure!

 

[battie]

Does anyone have any experiences they're willing to share about moving with partners/boyfriends, girlfriends / spouses for vet school? I've had a mini-conversation with my boyfriend about thinking VERY hard on whether he wants to move across the country with me for vet school (we've been living together 3 years). So far he's been excited and understanding over it, and we're ending our current lease and living apart with respective families over the summer to save money, but there's a part of me that feels like the whole situation is like Bambi before their parents get shot. Not to mention I found out he still looks up on an ex like, religiously? I just wonder if the relationship drama with vet school is worth dealing with.

1. I ended up breaking up with my ex a few weeks after receiving my only interview the year I was accepted. His expectations and desires for our life together had really fallen apart during that gap year. He essentially was hoping I wouldn't be accepted at all. And even if I was, he expected me to live halfway between Champaign and whatever major metro area for him to work, which wasn't realistic.

2. Why the hell is he looking up an ex religiously? That's a conversation and potentially a non-starter for me.

3. I was single first year 1.0. Then was a situation-ship with my now husband for about two years. 🤣😅🤦🏼‍♀️ He was much more supportive of my vet school journey and no doctor life.

 

[katiemcat]

Does anyone have any experiences they're willing to share about moving with partners/boyfriends, girlfriends / spouses for vet school? I've had a mini-conversation with my boyfriend about thinking VERY hard on whether he wants to move across the country with me for vet school (we've been living together 3 years). So far he's been excited and understanding over it, and we're ending our current lease and living apart with respective families over the summer to save money, but there's a part of me that feels like the whole situation is like Bambi before their parents get shot. Not to mention I found out he still looks up on an ex like, religiously? I just wonder if the relationship drama with vet school is worth dealing with.

My husband moved to Gainesville with me only a year into our relationship and we are now married. I am grateful for his sacrifice and his support everyday. It also told me he was in our relationship for the long run.

The looking up the ex religiously is …. Interesting. Is there context to this?

 

[overcastkidjuno]

Does anyone have any experiences they're willing to share about moving with partners/boyfriends, girlfriends / spouses for vet school? I've had a mini-conversation with my boyfriend about thinking VERY hard on whether he wants to move across the country with me for vet school (we've been living together 3 years). So far he's been excited and understanding over it, and we're ending our current lease and living apart with respective families over the summer to save money, but there's a part of me that feels like the whole situation is like Bambi before their parents get shot. Not to mention I found out he still looks up on an ex like, religiously? I just wonder if the relationship drama with vet school is worth dealing with.

To weigh in from the opposite perspective: my boyfriend did not move with me for vet school; he was too established in his job back home & I also plan to return there once I graduate. My school is about a 3.5-4 hour drive from home, so not long distance but still like... medium distance? We usually see each other every 3-4 weeks or so. It was really hard to adjust at first (we've been together for over 6 years & never more than 30 minutes apart) but as the time has gone on it's gotten easier. I think "starting over completely" in a new place & adjusting to vet school was easier having the complete freedom of being on my own... as in, having the freedom to go explore the city on impulse, spend extra hours in the lab, meet classmates, etc. & I honestly do think in some cases a bit of distance for a while can make a relationship stronger, if you both feel the work is worth it.

If you feel hesitant about being with him it would definitely be something to think about. Going to vet school is a big change... it would be hard to feel trapped/resentful of someone you're stuck living with throughout all that, just to put in my tuppence.

 

[DVM882029]

The looking up the ex religiously is …. Interesting. Is there context to this?

Oh yes, didn't address this in my post but boy better have some solid answers for this one. That's a big no-no in my book (unless the ex is Taylor Swift or someone equally amazing, then YOLO).

 

[DVM882029]

Some context: The ex thing, y'all I wish I knew I am genuinely perplexed by men. The ex was a summer fling, but it was late that summer that I also met him for the first time and he pursued me. I lived in another state but we would text. Anyways, I moved into that area for a job starting in the fall and that's when we got serious. By this time, the summer fling had moved back to college in another state and he told me about her and that he had ended it amicably. I was like "that's fine thank you for telling me" Anyways flash-forward 3 years I find out he's been looking her up a lot these past few months and they texted a few times over those 3 years and he wishes her happy birthday every year, which he never told me about until I found out. When I found that out I asked if I had to worry about anything. He said no and we talked about it and he said I was the best real relationship he's had and doesn't want to leave, but he's had issues romanticizing relationships since childhood (? there's a lot to unpack here), but I find out he's still looking her up. For reference, I am his 2nd long-term relationship and I even met his first girlfriend from college and they still talk sporadically and she was very nice. This feels different. At risk of being TMI, I found ****ty poetry about a naked woman in a dream I'm assuming it's only one person lmao. So it all led me to ask him about thinking REALLY HARD on vet school, that I would be stupid busy, and I very calmly said if you want to see another person do not come to vet school with me. It's fine if you do but don't move across the country if that is the case and to think on if there's a situation he would like more than being with me. Like, I could not be more direct. It just would not make sense and a year ago he was not sure he would move with me if I got accepted, but now he is planning everything around it. Also who would go through the hassle of moving across the country with someone who's going to be dirt poor eating ramen if they're fantasizing about an ex? Idk, I'm just confused by all this. He is very loving and attentive to emotional state and has been incredibly supportive of me in school and pursuing vet school, if I wasn't a horrid snoop I would be none the wiser, but it feels like romanticizing a summer fling for this long is bizarre and insulting.
I feel like a summer apart will be good for me to just get some clarity and maybe for him as well.

Have you guys considered couples therapy just to figure out these dynamics? I have more thoughts but would have to reread this.

 

[Cowsrcool]

Some context: The ex thing, y'all I wish I knew I am genuinely perplexed by men. The ex was a summer fling, but it was late that summer that I also met him for the first time and he pursued me. I lived in another state but we would text. Anyways, I moved into that area for a job starting in the fall and that's when we got serious. By this time, the summer fling had moved back to college in another state and he told me about her and that he had ended it amicably. I was like "that's fine thank you for telling me" Anyways flash-forward 3 years I find out he's been looking her up a lot these past few months and they texted a few times over those 3 years and he wishes her happy birthday every year, which he never told me about until I found out. When I found that out I asked if I had to worry about anything. He said no and we talked about it and he said I was the best real relationship he's had and doesn't want to leave, but he's had issues romanticizing relationships since childhood (? there's a lot to unpack here), but I find out he's still looking her up. For reference, I am his 2nd long-term relationship and I even met his first girlfriend from college and they still talk sporadically and she was very nice. This feels different. At risk of being TMI, I found ****ty poetry about a naked woman in a dream I'm assuming it's only one person lmao. So it all led me to ask him about thinking REALLY HARD on vet school, that I would be stupid busy, and I very calmly said if you want to see another person do not come to vet school with me. It's fine if you do but don't move across the country if that is the case and to think on if there's a situation he would like more than being with me. Like, I could not be more direct. It just would not make sense and a year ago he was not sure he would move with me if I got accepted, but now he is planning everything around it. Also who would go through the hassle of moving across the country with someone who's going to be dirt poor eating ramen if they're fantasizing about an ex? Idk, I'm just confused by all this. He is very loving and attentive to emotional state and has been incredibly supportive of me in school and pursuing vet school, if I wasn't a horrid snoop I would be none the wiser, but it feels like romanticizing a summer fling for this long is bizarre and insulting.
I feel like a summer apart will be good for me to just get some clarity and maybe for him as well.

I went through a very similar relationship. Red flags all over I fear. Reaching out to a situationship to wish them a happy birthday every year? Absolutely not. If he felt it was completely closed and over, he would not reach out to her. I’m sorry, Shiloh, you deserve BETTER! I say take this summer for yourself and see what comes of it. If distance makes the heart grow fonder, great! If distance means the relationship won’t work then it wasn’t meant to be because if it was meant to work no distance would matter.

 

[katiemcat]

Some context: The ex thing, y'all I wish I knew I am genuinely perplexed by men. The ex was a summer fling, but it was late that summer that I also met him for the first time and he pursued me. I lived in another state but we would text. Anyways, I moved into that area for a job starting in the fall and that's when we got serious. By this time, the summer fling had moved back to college in another state and he told me about her and that he had ended it amicably. I was like "that's fine thank you for telling me" Anyways flash-forward 3 years I find out he's been looking her up a lot these past few months and they texted a few times over those 3 years and he wishes her happy birthday every year, which he never told me about until I found out. When I found that out I asked if I had to worry about anything. He said no and we talked about it and he said I was the best real relationship he's had and doesn't want to leave, but he's had issues romanticizing relationships since childhood (? there's a lot to unpack here), but I find out he's still looking her up. For reference, I am his 2nd long-term relationship and I even met his first girlfriend from college and they still talk sporadically and she was very nice. This feels different. At risk of being TMI, I found ****ty poetry about a naked woman in a dream I'm assuming it's only one person lmao. So it all led me to ask him about thinking REALLY HARD on vet school, that I would be stupid busy, and I very calmly said if you want to see another person do not come to vet school with me. It's fine if you do but don't move across the country if that is the case and to think on if there's a situation he would like more than being with me. Like, I could not be more direct. It just would not make sense and a year ago he was not sure he would move with me if I got accepted, but now he is planning everything around it. Also who would go through the hassle of moving across the country with someone who's going to be dirt poor eating ramen if they're fantasizing about an ex? Idk, I'm just confused by all this. He is very loving and attentive to emotional state and has been incredibly supportive of me in school and pursuing vet school, if I wasn't a horrid snoop I would be none the wiser, but it feels like romanticizing a summer fling for this long is bizarre and insulting.
I feel like a summer apart will be good for me to just get some clarity and maybe for him as well.

The “problems romanticizing relationships” sticks out to me. Especially because you say you’re his second real relationship. Is he romanticizing his relationship with you or her? Both would be a problem.
This is some biased advice, but I really believe a lot of young men need to be through a couple of relationships to develop real emotional intelligence and appreciation for their partners (there are unicorns out there and if it’s you I apologize!) In college I serially dated men like this and dealt with the myriad of excuses for why they behave the way they do (my childhood! you’re my first real relationship! I still want to enjoy my youth!) Then I met my husband and he gave me everything I ever wanted without asking. I never questioned his dedication to me. He never gave me reasons to doubt him or fear he may stray. In my opinion if a man is serious about you, he will give it his all to be with you. He wouldn’t spend time chatting with and looking up pictures of a summertime hookup. If he was really determined to make it work with you after you brought up your discomfort he would have stopped.
Some helpful advice when I recieved from others when I was in your shoes: Is this how you see your future husband treating you? Would you be okay with your child’s partner treating them like this? If right now you had to walk away from this person or be tied to them for life what would you choose?

 

[Shiloh47]

I went through a very similar relationship. Red flags all over I fear. Reaching out to a situationship to wish them a happy birthday every year? Absolutely not. If he felt it was completely closed and over, he would not reach out to her. I’m sorry, Shiloh, you deserve BETTER! I say take this summer for yourself and see what comes of it. If distance makes the heart grow fonder, great! If distance means the relationship won’t work then it wasn’t meant to be because if it was meant to work no distance would matter.

Dear god I’m sorry you went through something similar, I wouldn’t wish this crap on my worst enemy. Ugh yeah I do deserve better, I know this but being financially codependent in small living quarters is certainly an experience 💀. I think this summer should be…enlightening.

 

[battie]

I'll add that my husband and I were long distance 100% of vet school except for COVID online clinics where I lived with him and his bestie for 4 months. Otherwise, we lived 1000 miles apart. So experience is a bit different in that living with a vet student is hard.

 

[MixedAnimals77]

Does anyone have any experiences they're willing to share about moving with partners/boyfriends, girlfriends / spouses for vet school? I've had a mini-conversation with my boyfriend about thinking VERY hard on whether he wants to move across the country with me for vet school (we've been living together 3 years). So far he's been excited and understanding over it, and we're ending our current lease and living apart with respective families over the summer to save money, but there's a part of me that feels like the whole situation is like Bambi before their parents get shot. Not to mention I found out he still looks up on an ex like, religiously? I just wonder if the relationship drama with vet school is worth dealing with.

When I decided to move half way across the country for school I told my then fiancé to stay behind until he got a job up where I was (his field can take 6mo-1 year to get hired). He didn't think it was a good idea (he didn't think he could do the long distance thing) despite me saying like I'll be really busy etc. Ultimately he ended up moving with me. It was good in the sense that he did eventually get a job and was able to take care of the living expenses and he was pretty understanding of the vet school grind and he was able to help out with our dog. It was also nice to have someone outside of vet school to talk to pretty regularly that wasn't my parents. It also ended up being very good for our relationship to be far away from parental influences. It was a challenge though a bit at first as it was our first time living together and he wasn't employed right away which was frustrating for me and we had a few fights over. Overall though I'm glad he came with me, though as far as I go I think it would've been fine either way.

Sounds like others have chimed in on that last part and you all have whatever to figure out, but that's my experience with moving to vet school with a significant other.

 

[purrlywhites]

After reading the WWYD thread, I feel like the idea of loans are hitting me right now. I haven’t gotten into a school yet but the rest that I’m waiting on are gonna be over 350k total probably, given COL and tuition. With my stats, I feel it is risky to wait another cycle if I happen to get in this year, because it is only getting more competitive and more expensive. I have no IS as a Nevada resident, so I’m wondering if I can get into Utah State and get a stipend from Nevada’s new stipend promise. That would be the dream but my sciGPA is a 3.2 and I have a weak upward GPA trend. I don’t even know why I would apply to a school like LIU if now I might not accept a waitlist acceptance, but before it felt like a safety school. Now.. it feels like a waste. Any Nevada residents stuck in this position without an IS/WICHE option?

 

[honeypot999]

The double standard of expectations of small animal focused students vs large animal focused students is getting to the point where I’m fed up.

I love large animal, I plan to go into it, yet I’m still required to know what is going on with small animal disease because that’s part of the curriculum. Yet it feels like my SA colleagues aren’t expected to do the same, because the material is “too hard and too dense”. They’ve been complaining all week about our upcoming large animal exam and begging to know what questions will be asked. It’s embarrassing and frustrating at the point.

I just feel so disappointed.

 

[pp9]

The double standard of expectations of small animal focused students vs large animal focused students is getting to the point where I’m fed up.

I love large animal, I plan to go into it, yet I’m still required to know what is going on with small animal disease because that’s part of the curriculum. Yet it feels like my SA colleagues aren’t expected to do the same, because the material is “too hard and too dense”. They’ve been complaining all week about our upcoming large animal exam and begging to know what questions will be asked. It’s embarrassing and frustrating at the point.

I just feel so disappointed.

Eh just ignore them. Think of this as a fond memory you can remind them of when they are having meltdowns over how much large animal info is on the NAVLE. A lot of people feel like the stuff they aren't interested in isn't worth knowing (this applies to rotating internmates, too). I had classmates bitching about exotics and small animal classes in addition to large animal.

My class had several repeat offenders that were downright embarrassing. You just knew what was going to come when they raised a hand in class. Some people can be very disrespectful to the clinicians/profs they feel aren't 'important' to their career ambitions and it's absolutely shameful.

 

[battie]

The double standard of expectations of small animal focused students vs large animal focused students is getting to the point where I’m fed up.

I love large animal, I plan to go into it, yet I’m still required to know what is going on with small animal disease because that’s part of the curriculum. Yet it feels like my SA colleagues aren’t expected to do the same, because the material is “too hard and too dense”. They’ve been complaining all week about our upcoming large animal exam and begging to know what questions will be asked. It’s embarrassing and frustrating at the point.

I just feel so disappointed.

We had a pair of British profs, with one focused very heavily on large animal medicine. Whenever there were grumbles about large animal medicine, he would remind the class that when he was young, his SA colleagues were pulled from their jobs to help the agriculture sector with the mad cow outbreak. And that if something similar we're to happen in the US, it would be on a much larger scale and all of us would be repurposed to be large animal doctors for however long we would be needed.

That was a good way to get people to get over themselves. And I feel like it's a good reason for complete licensure rather than divided.

After my class, Illinois actually separated out the third year exams from sa and la combined to their own separate things because people knew if they did well enough on the sa questions, they could do poorly on the LA and be just fine. And I think it was a good move.

 

[kelizolson]

I am feeling a bit hopeless right now with vet school. I applied to 6 schools this cycle (first timer), rejected by 1, interviews with 3 and then the last 2 don’t do interviews. I was waitlisted at CSU for OOS. So I’m happy I have that as a possibility otherwise I literally don’t know anything for the other 4 besides the rejection!!!

I hate this feeling of limbo. It has caused my anxiety to increase 10-fold. I’ve already muted any vet school subreddit I’m in. I think I need to limit how much time I’m spending on here. Sometimes it’s triggering. I keep trying to remember that patience is a virtue but it’s JUST SO HARD!!!!

 

[Rubygirl24]

I am feeling a bit hopeless right now with vet school. I applied to 6 schools this cycle (first timer), rejected by 1, interviews with 3 and then the last 2 don’t do interviews. I was waitlisted at CSU for OOS. So I’m happy I have that as a possibility otherwise I literally don’t know anything for the other 4 besides the rejection!!!

I hate this feeling of limbo. It has caused my anxiety to increase 10-fold. I’ve already muted any vet school subreddit I’m in. I think I need to limit how much time I’m spending on here. Sometimes it’s triggering. I keep trying to remember that patience is a virtue but it’s JUST SO HARD!!!!

I was rejected or waitlisted to all schools I applied to in the past. Fingers crossed as my schools haven’t released acceptances yet. But having been in the limbo before my best advice is if it doesn’t happen this year, take that chance to grow, as an individual, veterinary applicant and as a professional. Not getting in gave me a year of just being married and adjusting to married life, it allowed me to gain phenomenal experience by working full time in a multi species clinic, and it has allowed me to work with youth in my home town and coach them in a organization that gave me so much. Was I super upset initially, absolutely. And if you end up in that boat, feel those feelings and when you are done let that rejection propel your growth the next year. The limbo is tough, it’s frustrating and staying away from obsessing about it is huge. Focus on what you can control and remember there can be a blessing in the waiting. It’s tough but hang in there many of us are right there with you!

 

[bopdropnroll]

Feeling very frustrated with this cycle and what to do if I don't get in. I applied to 6 schools, rejected from 3, interview waitlist at Penn, waitlisted at OVC, and haven't heard from Tufts yet (my IS). I need to decide what I'm doing if this cycle pans out for me but apartments are hard to come by where I currently live and will be out of housing that isn't with my parents on May 25th, so waiting to move up on a waitlist doesn't seem feasible for me. I want to move in with my boyfriend and decide that we're doing that once I hear if Tufts is a rejection, but I also feel conflicted about not waiting out these potential waitlist offers.

Another complication of this is that I have been second guessing my decision to go to vet school HARD. The loans in particular have been weighing on me recently and it feels stupid to make a 250k+ commitment without being 100% sure I want the career. The longer I wait to make this decision the less likely it will be that I can find an affordable apartment or transition to full time at my current clinic job as business has been down and another full-time employee isn't currently needed. I've always been interested in infectious disease/public health so I also applied to a Department of Health job but I don't want my resume to show me job-hopping either. Considering applying to the Tufts DVM/MPH program but that would be even more expensive, and again a huge financial commitment to not be sure of the decision. Any advice is useful I'm just so stuck ugh

 

[pp9]

Feeling very frustrated with this cycle and what to do if I don't get in. I applied to 6 schools, rejected from 3, interview waitlist at Penn, waitlisted at OVC, and haven't heard from Tufts yet (my IS). I need to decide what I'm doing if this cycle pans out for me but apartments are hard to come by where I currently live and will be out of housing that isn't with my parents on May 25th, so waiting to move up on a waitlist doesn't seem feasible for me. I want to move in with my boyfriend and decide that we're doing that once I hear if Tufts is a rejection, but I also feel conflicted about not waiting out these potential waitlist offers.

Another complication of this is that I have been second guessing my decision to go to vet school HARD. The loans in particular have been weighing on me recently and it feels stupid to make a 250k+ commitment without being 100% sure I want the career. The longer I wait to make this decision the less likely it will be that I can find an affordable apartment or transition to full time at my current clinic job as business has been down and another full-time employee isn't currently needed. I've always been interested in infectious disease/public health so I also applied to a Department of Health job but I don't want my resume to show me job-hopping either. Considering applying to the Tufts DVM/MPH program but that would be even more expensive, and again a huge financial commitment to not be sure of the decision. Any advice is useful I'm just so stuck ugh

My advice: If you are not 100% in, you are out. This applies to a lot of things in life honestly: marriage, having kids, etc.

 

[Cats4Lyfe]

Feeling very frustrated with this cycle and what to do if I don't get in. I applied to 6 schools, rejected from 3, interview waitlist at Penn, waitlisted at OVC, and haven't heard from Tufts yet (my IS). I need to decide what I'm doing if this cycle pans out for me but apartments are hard to come by where I currently live and will be out of housing that isn't with my parents on May 25th, so waiting to move up on a waitlist doesn't seem feasible for me. I want to move in with my boyfriend and decide that we're doing that once I hear if Tufts is a rejection, but I also feel conflicted about not waiting out these potential waitlist offers.

Another complication of this is that I have been second guessing my decision to go to vet school HARD. The loans in particular have been weighing on me recently and it feels stupid to make a 250k+ commitment without being 100% sure I want the career. The longer I wait to make this decision the less likely it will be that I can find an affordable apartment or transition to full time at my current clinic job as business has been down and another full-time employee isn't currently needed. I've always been interested in infectious disease/public health so I also applied to a Department of Health job but I don't want my resume to show me job-hopping either. Considering applying to the Tufts DVM/MPH program but that would be even more expensive, and again a huge financial commitment to not be sure of the decision. Any advice is useful I'm just so stuck ugh

Idk how much time you have spent in clinics, but I am with pp9 on this one. If you aren't 100% in, this probably isn't for you. It's a lot of school, a lot of debt, and a difficult career field. If you have minimal clinic experience, I would recommend calling clinics to shadow asap to determine if this is really what you want. I know more than one vet who went into vet school with minimal experience and came out the other end stuck in a career that wasn't what they expected.