Silly Dead Duck Joke

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WildZooVet

WildZooVet
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A woman brought a very limp duck into a vet's office.
She laid her pet on the table; the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said 'I'm so sorry, your d
uck, "Cuddles" has passed away'
The distressed owner wailed 'Are you sure?'
'Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead' he replied.
'How can you be so sure,' she protested. 'I mean, you haven't done any testing
o
n him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something'
The Vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returned a few
m
inutes later with a black Labrador retriever.
As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs,
put his paws on the table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then l
ooked at the Vet with sad eyes and shook his head.
The vet patted the dog, and took it out, and returned a few minutes later with a cat.

The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, mewed softly and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, 'I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most
definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck'.

The vet turned to his PC, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.
$150!' she cried, '$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!'
The vet just shrugged, and said 'I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab report and the Cat scan, it's now $150' :laugh:

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LOLZ!! 🤣 I just emailed that to everyone at my animal hospital. Thanks for posting!
 
30972Vet_tutored.jpg
 
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Perhaps I am just easily amused, but I found that fricken hilarious.
 
"I'm going to get tutored!":laugh:

Here's one for chemistry lovers:

Two atoms are walking down the road. The first atom says to the second atom, "I think I lost an electron." The second atom said, "Are you sure?" To which the other atom responded, "I'm positive!":idea:
 
Our clinical pathology final was today and our radiology final is tomorrow...I gotta share that one! 😀
 
I double dog dare someone to use this in a bar:

"If I were an enzyme I would be helicase so I could unzip your genes"

Although you might get this reaction...:slap:
 
Ha! I've actually heard a guy use that one.
I'm glad it wasn't on me.
 
how many first-year physics students does it take to screw in a light bulb?


None. It's a second year course.


😀
 
A woman brought a very limp duck into a vet's office...


My former roommate's dad told me that joke and I think it's one of the funniest jokes I've ever heard! I LOVE it! 😀
 
I double dog dare someone to use this in a bar:

"If I were an enzyme I would be helicase so I could unzip your genes"

You know, I am not sure if that would be a turn-off or a turn-on :laugh:
 
Ive got another enzyme joke, its my favorite!

What is the difference between an enzyme and a hormone?

You can't hear an enzyme...


Think about it for a sec 🙂
 
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