Things I don't want .....

[BadVB750]

Advertisement - Members don't see this ad

So, I just started a month of the ICU and have been slapped in the face with all the things I don't know. Despite my feelings of inpetitude, I have discovered there are a lot of things I would rather not experience before I die.

1. A rectal tube
2. VRE< MRSA< C.DIFF
3. Being intubated by an intern
4. Vomiting feces
5. Sepsis
6. A trip to the trauma bay
7. ........

 

[Dr.Evil1]

Interesting debate here:

Foley vs. NGT

Discuss

I think that I go for the NGT but have never experienced either. Just waiting for the alcohol abuse to catch up with me.

 

[basementbeastie]

rectal tube! don't knock it till you try it!!😱

 

[EctopicFetus]

If I had to choose NG way before Foley.

 

[GeneralVeers]

rectal tube! don't knock it till you try it!!😱

"Why does lucky get a rectal tube? And there I was, using my own sphincter like a sucker!" - Homer Simpson

 

[waterski232002]

Agree..... NGT way before foley

 

[deleted109597]

If I had to choose NG way before Foley.

Had a Foley twice, but I was asleep for both of them. It is real hard to pee afterwards.
I would not want to be awake with an NG either though.

 

[Chronic Student]

As for me, I'll have to pass on the Fournier gangrene 😱

-Mike

 

[SoCuteMD]

Syphilis.

 

[DrQuinn]

I'd rather have a foley. Just to give it a shot.
Q

 

[DropkickMurphy]

I'd rather have a Foley than a chest tube. There is just something (speaking from experience) wrong about the feeling of having someone's finger in your chest cavity while you're conscious.

 

[DropkickMurphy]

Syphilis.

So gonorrhea, chlamydia, trich, herpes, trachoma, HPV, PID, chancroid, and dourine are all OK with you?

 

[DropkickMurphy]

Syphilis.

I'm so sorry SoCuteMD, but I have a contractual obligation 😉 to use this here:

Inflammation of the foreskin reminds me of your smile.
I've had ballanital chancroids for quite a little while.
I gave my heart to NSU that lovely night in June. (Non-specific urethritis)
I ache for you my darling, and I hope you get well soon.

My penile warts, your herpes,
My syphilitic sores,
Your monenelial infetion, how I miss you more and more.
Your dhobis itch,
My scrumpox,
Our lovely gonorrhoea.
At least we both were lying when we said that we were clear.

Our syphilic kisses sealed the secret of our tryst.
You gave me scrotal pustules with a quick flick of your wrist.
Your trichovaginitis sent shivers down my spine.
I got snail tracks in my anus when your spirochaetes met mine.

Gonococcal urethritis,
streptococcal balinitis,
Meningomyelitis,
Diplococcal cephalitis,
Epididymitis,
interstitial keratitis,
Syphilitic choroiditis and anterior ureitis.

My clapped-out genitalia is not so bad for me
As the complete and utter failure every time I try to pee.
My doctor says my buboes are the worst he's ever seen.
My scrotum's painted orange and my balls are turning green.

My heart is very tender,
'Though the parts are awful raw.
You might have been infected, but you never were a bore.
I'm dying of your love, my love,
I'm your spirochaetal clown.
I've left my body to science,
But I'm afraid they've turned it down.
Gonococcal urethritis,
streptococcal balinitis,
Meningomyelitis,
Diplococcal cephalitis,
Epididymitis,
interstitial keratitis,
Syphilitic choroiditis and anterior ureitis.

 

[AmoryBlaine]

Interesting debate here:

Foley vs. NGT

Discuss

I think that I go for the NGT but have never experienced either. Just waiting for the alcohol abuse to catch up with me.

I would take 3 NGT placements over one Foley.

Add one more to the list from SICU: open abdominal wound

 

[BadVB750]

Syphilis.

Depends on who I got syphillis from and how wild the night was. I can handle a painless chancre, plus a little PCN will fix me up.

 

[Lumberg]

I'll take none of the above plus gynecomastia and galactorrhea. Wouldn't want the milky man-boobs...but that's just me.

 

[Febrifuge]

A nurse gave me a Foley once.

Once.

 

[DiveMD]

Fournier's gangrene...

 

[Jeff698]

Trauma alert.

 

[TPS report]

Interesting debate here:

Foley vs. NGT

Discuss

I think that I go for the NGT but have never experienced either. Just waiting for the alcohol abuse to catch up with me.

NGT.

when I was in the ICU I saw a guy with Ogilvie Syn and he had an NGT, a rectal tube, and a foley!! Triple bonus!! Trifecta party favors!! 😱 😱

 

[BadVB750]

NGT.

when I was in the ICU I saw a guy with Ogilvie Syn and he had an NGT, a rectal tube, and a foley!! Triple bonus!! Trifecta party favors!! 😱 😱

The reason I started this thread was cause I saw a guy with the trifecta. My sphincter hurts just thinking about it.

 

[doctawife]

I say NGT > foley > ETT > chest tube > open abdomen > open chest > EVD

'Cause in my institution one only gets an extra ventricular drain (EVD) on the traumatic brain injury / increased intracranial pressure protocol and those folks do NOT do well.

At all.

Future trach/g-tube/seizure patient, anyone? Yuck!

 

[NKMU]

the hivv

 

[doctawife]

the hivv

Well, High 5 (HIV) can lead to all the bad things we want to avoid. So that's kind of a cheat answer. Which mechanical consequences of HIV would you like to avoid? The cryptococcal encephalitis? What?!? Be specific!

 

[Chronic Student]

Did I mention I'd also pass on the IABP!

-Mike

 

[leviathan]

So, I just started a month of the ICU and have been slapped in the face with all the things I don't know. Despite my feelings of inpetitude, I have discovered there are a lot of things I would rather not experience before I die.

1. A rectal tube
2. VRE< MRSA< C.DIFF
3. Being intubated by an intern
4. Vomiting feces
5. Sepsis
6. A trip to the trauma bay
7. ........

Bottle in front of me > frontal lobotomy.

 

[TPS report]

The reason I started this thread was cause I saw a guy with the trifecta. My sphincter hurts just thinking about it.

umm, add maggots in a necrotic wound to the list.

and, fungal crud growing in pannus folds

and of course, a ventriculostomy placed by a gungho neurosurg intern!

oooh, I also do *NOT* like going to the prison ward. It CREEPS me out.

 

[deleted109597]

Dehiscence

 

[macdaddy23]

Burns, any kind but ones requiring an admit to the burn unit--definitely not.

 

[doctawife]

umm, add maggots in a necrotic wound to the list.

Actually, maggots in the wound is a good thing. They eat the necrotic tissue so it can't get all infected and nasty. American Civil War medicine, gotta love it!

 

[Bill59]

Anything that's considered a "good teaching case" > anything that provokes a lot of picture taking

 

[dchristismi]

Locked in
High trached/vented quad.
Any high% TBSA burn

To be perfectly honest, I'd put up with the NGT/foley/whatever so long as I had a reasonable shot at a meaningful life. I'd rather not experience most of those, but hopefully I'll live long enough that someday it becomes an issue.

But please, if I end up like the the 80-something year old double amputee in septic shock from likely mesenteric ischemia that I saw last night, don't do everything I had to do to her. Just turn on the morphine.

 

[TPS report]

recto-vaginal fistula !! 😱 😱 😱 😱

 

[TPS report]

ani pruritus.....i.e., pinworms coming out of my bum. ((or for that matter, any living creature crawling out of my exit portal))

tapeworms crawling out of my arm.....! shizzzzzle!!!!!!!!!!!!😱

 

[dchristismi]

Yeah, that would be bad. Although if I had a tapeworm, I could eat a lot more and stay skinny... so wouldn't be ALL bad

 

[deleted19731]

.

 

[TPS report]

don't want a 3 finger rectal!!

also don't want that heinous toture exam in ob /gyn where you put a finger in the vagina AND the rectum at the same time !!! 😱 😱 😱 😱

I think I would projectile vomit then die on the spot if I had that done to me.

 

[Thievery Corp.]

Hey this is my first post in the EM forum! 😀

I gotta vote for aortic dissection...

 

[Dunce]

don't want a 3 finger rectal!!

also don't want that heinous toture exam in ob /gyn where you put a finger in the vagina AND the rectum at the same time !!! 😱 😱 😱 😱

I think I would projectile vomit then die on the spot if I had that done to me.

affectionately known as "The Shocker" . . . AKA two-in-the-pink-one-in-the-stink

[sorry to those who just puked a little in their mouth]

 

[doctawife]

don't want a 3 finger rectal!!

also don't want that heinous toture exam in ob /gyn where you put a finger in the vagina AND the rectum at the same time !!! 😱 😱 😱 😱

I think I would projectile vomit then die on the spot if I had that done to me.

Well, if you're a woman and your OB/GYN is any good, you will experience this. The bimanual exam is, unfortunately, the best way to find pelvic masses.

Or would you rather die for ovarian cancer... ?

 

[Dunce]

I don't think the standard bimanual exam includes the step mentioned by TPS Report

 

[FoughtFyr]

I don't think the standard bimanual exam includes the step mentioned by TPS Report

Umm, a proper pelvic for undifferentiated pelvic pain does include that step. Recto-vag endometreosis, and other pathology within that pouch can only be detected on physical exam by a recto-vag bimanual...

Sorry...

Now if the doctor only uses one hand (or "forgets" to put on gloves), that is another story...

- H

 

[MiesVanDerMom]

Well, if you're a woman and your OB/GYN is any good, you will experience this. The bimanual exam is, unfortunately, the best way to find pelvic masses.

Or would you rather die for ovarian cancer... ?

I've had this and it was fine. Easier than going to the dentist. A LOT easier than everything that comes with having babies.

My sister had an NG tube and said if I was ever given the option, go with the tube up the poop-shoot. She chose NG and regretted it (that's what she gets for drinking herself half-dead at a wedding...)

 

[Febrifuge]

Umm, a proper pelvic for undifferentiated pelvic pain does include that step. Recto-vag endometreosis, and other pathology within that pouch can only be detected on physical exam by a recto-vag bimanual...

Sorry...- H

All this time, when the residents were talking about "bimanual exams" I thought that meant one gloved hand inside the vagina and one on the external abdomen, gently pressing in opposition. Like, for masses on the anterior wall and whatnot.

I guess if I think it through, how else you gonna check for masses on the posterior wall...

That sad little hissing noise was the last of my innocence dying.

 

[USCDiver]

Can I get a vote in for paralytics, but not enough sedation/anesthesia during a prolonged abdominal surgery and/or amputation?

 

[deleted109597]

ani pruritus.....i.e., pinworms coming out of my bum. ((or for that matter, any living creature crawling out of my exit portal))

tapeworms crawling out of my arm.....! shizzzzzle!!!!!!!!!!!!😱

Tapeworms don't live in the arm though.

 

[BKN]

All this time, when the residents were talking about "bimanual exams" I thought that meant one gloved hand inside the vagina and one on the external abdomen, gently pressing in opposition. Like, for masses on the anterior wall and whatnot.

I guess if I think it through, how else you gonna check for masses on the posterior wall...

That sad little hissing noise was the last of my innocence dying.

Keep your innocence, that is the definition of bimanual. The other is called a rectovaginal exam and requires one hand..

 

[lucky_deadman]

Tapeworms don't live in the arm though.

It's pretty obvious (at least to my seeing eye dog) that the pic shows a person removing packing from his arm.

To get in on the fun, how about Quad Chest Tubes, flail chest, ruptured pulmonary artery, aortic dissection from root to split, or maybe an emergency thoracotomy.

Also not heard Bone Marrow Biopsy mentioned. Take my word for it, choose the NGT or the Foley over it anyday!!! Not to mention Chemo Tx. It'll help you lose weight probably as good if not better than the tapeworm.

 

[Bill59]

Tapeworms don't live in the arm though.

But Dracunculus medinensis does. A nematode coming out of your arm wouldn't be much better.

 

[docB]

affectionately known as "The Shocker" . . . AKA two-in-the-pink-one-in-the-stink

[sorry to those who just puked a little in their mouth]

Now that's one I've never heard. I am truly disgusted and disturbed. Well done.