How much do you give your parents?

Started by mentos
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mentos

mentos

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For those who help out your parents financially, how much do you give them? My parents are well off but my wife's parents make near minimum wage. She gives $200 per paycheck, plus pays for any big unexpected expenses - broken boiler, vet bill, car repairs etc. She pays anytime we eat out or go on vacation. They're on our family phone plan and we don't ask for any money. I'd estimate she gives them around 10k/year on average.
 
I spent like $50000 for my parents last 10 years. They have absolutely no retirement plan.
Alas, My family and I are definitely in an abnormal situation though.
No need to say details but just know that lawyers and monthly bills cost a lot. lol

Be grateful to have loving parents.
 
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TerryTerry said:
I spent like $50000 for my parents last 10 years. They have absolutely no retirement plan.
Alas, My family and I are definitely in an abnormal situation though.
No need to say details but just know that lawyers and monthly bills cost a lot. lol

Be grateful to have loving parents.
Click to expand...

What are lawyers for?
 
My parents seem to live off of social security/pension payouts in WV pretty well.

My mother got a job with the government at the treasury dept at Public Debt without a college degree somehow. And 20 years in gets you a gov't pension, apparently. My stepdad doesn't do anything and never really did anything. No nothing.

My dad worked at Kroger for like 40 years and got in on the old, old, old union contract from the 60s that gave him a pension. He was a grocery clerk. And he has a pension. Like, a decent one. He doesn't work and travels all the time. Drives a brand new Ford Ecosport (which in WV is considered very nice). Could you imagine a grocery store worker today getting a pension? It sounds ridiculous.

They didn't have much money when I was growing up, but they are flourishing in retirement.

The baby boomers had the easiest path to success I can imagine. Could you imagine your life fallback plan being "**** it, I'll go work at the local grocery store and make a living wage with pension and medical." What a damned utopia they grew up in.
 
WVUPharm2007 said:
My parents seem to live off of social security/pension payouts in WV pretty well.

My mother got a job with the government at the treasury dept at Public Debt without a college degree somehow. And 20 years in gets you a gov't pension, apparently. My stepdad doesn't do anything and never really did anything. No nothing.

My dad worked at Kroger for like 40 years and got in on the old, old, old union contract from the 60s that gave him a pension. He was a grocery clerk. And he has a pension. Like, a decent one. He doesn't work and travels all the time. Drives a brand new Ford Ecosport (which in WV is considered very nice). Could you imagine a grocery store worker today getting a pension? It sounds ridiculous.

They didn't have much money when I was growing up, but they are flourishing in retirement.

The baby boomers had the easiest path to success I can imagine. Could you imagine your life fallback plan being "**** it, I'll go work at the local grocery store and make a living wage with pension and medical." What a damned utopia they grew up in.
Click to expand...

Not to mention the brand new houses they got for dirt cheap!
 
I give as little as possible until I'm forced to when they get too old and can't work. My parents have no retirement savings.
 
None yet, I manage their retirement savings (they still work), but I’m the ultimate backstop. I bought my house with parents/live-in care in mind (additional master suite/separate living area) that is currently used as an office/home gym.

That was an extra $25k to add on to the house when we built it, but that was more of an indirect spend.

Plus, I’m in line to inherit the old family home with its artificially depressed basis in taxation so my total net spend over their lifetime, if managed appropriately, will likely be negative.
 
I'm not worried about my parents - pop worked a government job for 30 years and got a nice promotion and raise about 5 years before he retired (which was what they used to calculate his COLA corrected pension payments). He played the long game - he took a lower salary than he could have made in private industry in exchange for job security and a guaranteed pension. My parents will be fine - if they ever got into a financial pinch, they'd just sell their winter house.

My in-laws on the other hand...there is a reason I'm auto-depositing $800/month in a brokerage account that I will never expect to spend on me. With auto-deposit, it feels as if I never had the money in the first place, and I am hopeful it won't sting so bad when it is time to use it.
 
Father: Retired after 45 years of being a HS math teacher (Pension + SS + portfolio withdrawal of 1k a month) eats out ever day, fishes every other day.

Mother: Stayed with me and the wife for awhile to get back on her feet. Doing fine now.

Wife side of the family: Living off the land in the French Polynesia islands plus a handful working under french gov system (mostly Rurutu). Send a couple hundred a month plus extra if necessary since the American dollar goes far on some of the Austral Islands. Wife has land out there as well so her family congregates and takes care of it so its a win - win.
 
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msweph said:
How do you feel managing their retirement? Makes me nervous... but my parents who are old isn (both retired) apparent have a boatload of cash sitting around. I told them to buy stocks in March/April but they wouldn't.

They have never bought anything but ETF and mutual funds so individual stocks are scary for them --- which is fine-- they are 60s they don't need to spend their free time researching stocks.
Click to expand...

I’m actually more aggressive and I chase yield...because I’m effectively guaranteeing it, so while my parents are also in their 60s, including me in the calculation + their RE holdings eventually going to me lets me comfortably invest as if they are in their 50s.

I don’t research stocks for them, but I focus on allocation (stocks and options are for my fun account, hah). They’re about 60% stocks, 25% bonds, and 15% cash today.

They were at 70/20/10 about a month-ish ago. I’m slowly going risk off, but 60% equities is probably the bare minimum I’ll keep them at.
 
0. My parents are richer than me and they are at a different country so it's kinda hard to do anything for them.
 
My parents grew up dirt poor in coal company mining towns in rural WV. Their parents survived the great depression. They got their education and had government jobs that guaranteed great pensions and healthcare benefits. They're good.

Nobody has benefits like that anymore. And underneath our current economic system nobody ever will again.
 
owlegrad said:
This simply isn’t true. Lots of people have great benefits. By which I mean “the 1%” have great benefits.
Click to expand...

Yeah, when you have that much money, you can build your own pension. Not difficult to do with new 401k rules for those with more modest means, though. I’m not a huge fan, but it’s possible.
 
Government, state, municipal employees still have it good. Police and firefighters get crazy high pension.
 
mentos said:
For those who help out your parents financially, how much do you give them? My parents are well off but my wife's parents make near minimum wage. She gives $200 per paycheck, plus pays for any big unexpected expenses - broken boiler, vet bill, car repairs etc. She pays anytime we eat out or go on vacation. They're on our family phone plan and we don't ask for any money. I'd estimate she gives them around 10k/year on average.
Click to expand...

that's the thing 'bout marriage, your wife's or husband's family problems become your problems too
 
mentos said:
That's not relevant to this thread. The average household income here is like 200k. Giving parents money is not a problem for nearly everyone in this forum.
Click to expand...

I was referencing "that's the thing 'bout marriage, your wife's or husband's family problems become your problems too." in a cultural light.

Income alone doesn't always reflect with "how much" one gives (200k household income or not) as some parents will never be satisfied despite how much they receive (as referenced). In turn, that'd reflect how much some give to their folks.

So, if my household made 200k and my folks were greedy above their actual needs I'd pay minimal. If they're humble and I wish to give more then so be it. That'd definitely play a factor into how much anyone pays their parents.

Nice to see most have good parents on here.
 
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