RANT HERE thread

Veterinary Science Graduate Programs from U. of I.
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thenontraveler said:
Why is it SO hard to find left handed needle drivers that don't suck??? So many right handed ones of all sizes, but the one left handed one I can find that isn't like 140 dollars is a pain to use 😭😭😭😭 My life is already hard, can we make it a little easier by having some more options? Please????
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My school required us to all take our surgical skills exams/spay surgeries with right handed instruments. The logic was that left handed instruments are not super common, and if you are going to a new practice or your things are dirty you might be forced to use right-handed at some point. They didn't even carry left handed stuff anywhere in the school.

Honestly, they had a point. After a couple months of hand cramps as a first year student my left hand adjusted to that pulling motion you need to unclick the right handed instruments and now I don't notice (except for towel clamps which I usually end up using 2 hands to open). There are many situations I have been in where even if I had left handed instruments they would not have been available to me for surgeries and if I wasn't already comfortable with right handed instruments that would have been an additional stressor/complicating factor during surgery.

ETA: I never use my right hand for holding needle drivers, I always just use the right-handed instruments in my left hand. I personally would not feel secure using my right hand since my dexterity on that side is pretty poor.
 
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Back at it with another rant. Feeling a little disheartened, received an OOS interview alternate for one of my top schools. It’s rough. I did a fellowship program there this summer and I really was hoping to interview. I still have 5 other schools to hear back from and was accepted to Ross but realistically idk if I can swing the extra cost of loans to attend (especially with the uncertainty that is the DOE…) A little bummed but there’s still 5 schools and my IS (arguably the second hardest to get into on my list). So trying to stay hopeful.
 
Got taken to the cleaners over some spark plugs and a battery. $1400 was the quote and I had to beg for them to make it cheaper. $700 on labor for spark plugs, I should have watched a YouTube video at that rate. That’s what you get when they call you half asleep and you think $1400 sounds like $400
 
Someone dumped my dogs sibling and she was taken to the rescue where we adopted him 3 years ago. Tell me not to go get her!!!!!!
 
vampyrica said:
Back at it with another rant. Feeling a little disheartened, received an OOS interview alternate for one of my top schools. It’s rough. I did a fellowship program there this summer and I really was hoping to interview. I still have 5 other schools to hear back from and was accepted to Ross but realistically idk if I can swing the extra cost of loans to attend (especially with the uncertainty that is the DOE…) A little bummed but there’s still 5 schools and my IS (arguably the second hardest to get into on my list). So trying to stay hopeful.
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Can you share which school? Still waiting to hear from 6 schools. did have one interview earlier this month.
 
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honeypot999 said:
Got taken to the cleaners over some spark plugs and a battery. $1400 was the quote and I had to beg for them to make it cheaper. $700 on labor for spark plugs, I should have watched a YouTube video at that rate. That’s what you get when they call you half asleep and you think $1400 sounds like $400
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I try really hard to not judge the cost of other professions due to the crap we get. But why $700 to change spark plugs?!?!
 
battie said:
I try really hard to not judge the cost of other professions due to the crap we get. But why $700 to change spark plugs?!?!
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I have no idea when I asked they said it was 3 hours of labor, like damn I want to make $233 an hour. I negotiated it down to only paying $980 and decided to never go there again.

I just have the worst luck with cars
 
My dog is currently 2.5 hours from home having a hemilam (being cut as we speak and it is 8 pm where I am) after waking up this morning to her dragging her back end 😞
Edit: she is out of surgery and doing well and surgery itself went well 🩷🩷🩷 looooots of bruising of her spinal cord though 🙁
 
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Wanted to come on and rant because I am super annoyed with my health. Until a few years ago, I was very healthy had no issues etc.. and then COVID hit. I started breaking out in hives all the time for literally no apparent reason. Was told by my PCP that "oh, its just chronic urticaria" and then when I suggested maybe going to an allergist/immunologist (because I had never been), she proceeded to tell me that they don't usually send those cases there. Fast forward like 8 months and I've taken the damn famotidine and allegra she prescribed me, and surprise surprise... it did ~nothing~. For context- these hives were like debilitating. I would wake up in the middle of the night covered full body in hives and so itchy I couldn't sleep. I would also get them in the shower, laying down, standing up, in different houses, like SO RANDOM. I even tried hypoallergenic everything (hair products, lotion, deodorant, laundry detergent, etc). Then, when I revisited my PCP, she suggested I go to the allergist... which made me want to jump through the computer screen. but I digress...

Went to the allergist. Told me he could immediately tell I was a very allergic person. Was told I have oral allergy syndrome bc my tree/grass allergy is so bad that my body thinks some fruit is pollen and causes mild reactions. Also did the dermal allergy testing. Started allergy shots, went meh. Did them inconsistently (bc i was an undergrad and the facility was kinda far and inconvenient to me) for like 3 years but they def helped.

About a year later, I felt super anxious all the time, mood swings like crazy. Went to a different PCP and she diagnosed me with anxiety and gave me meds to try (very low dose). Took them for like 8 months or so and I think they helped me learn to regulate my emotions, but then I went off of it and have been fine since.

Also discontinued depo-provera injections for multiple reasons (and thank god I did since now they're being linked to brain tumors??)- experienced nightmare periods for 1wk on 1wk off (for like 6 months but was told my body would regulate..... it never did). So went in to have everything checked out, then got diagnosed with PCOS, mild though. Then went on an oral contraceptive that made me feel like crap for the first 6 months, but eventually it was fine and the nausea subsided.

Fast forward to now.... I'm a first year vet student and I have noticed that my heart rate is WAY to high to be appropriate. Sitting i'm at like 60-70 and when i stand/walk it jumps to like 120, often accompanied with lightheadedness.... Had an episode at school that involved the academic affairs team to call the rescue squad to make sure I was okay and they told me to get checked in case I have some kind of orthostatic tachycardia bc my BP was fine sitting and standing. Made an appointment for the cardiologist but had to wait until I was home for thanksgiving to go (bc insurance and whatnot). Went to the cardiologist like 4 days ago and talked to him about my symptoms and how I feel. He ordered a 7 day holter monitor, so now I'm wearing that and will have to mail it in for results. I'm honestly a bit concerned that I may have POTS, but worried that it will be very difficult to get diagnosed. Trying to be optimistic, but it's rather difficult. It's also frustrating as a student because I am constantly exhausted and fatigued to the point where I could sleep 20hrs a day if I let myself. My heart always feels like it's racing everytime I move or am moving. I have constant headaches and frequent migraines. I'm intermittently nauseous (and also an emetophobe) relatively frequently. Walking long distances to the parking lots absolutely kills me and I'm so winded by the time I get to my car. Also for context, I'm not overweight and have stayed relatively active, previously working as a vet tech for 3yrs during undergrad. Additionally, being a female I feel like many things get overlooked and pushed to the side medically which is so frustrating. Even more frustrating because I have diagnosed anxiety so many things have the potential to be because "maybe you're just anxious about something".

I am also worried that if I do have POTS that it will impact my ability to practice. I have interest in doing equine medicine but I'm not too entirely sure how that physically demanding field will work for me if my body can't get its life together. I love dog/cat med too and feel like I would be happy doing that, but I planned to track equine in school to get the experience and see what I like. Ugh. Just wanted to vent and post to others that may have felt the same way and also if anyone has experience with getting diagnosed for POTS since according to tiktok its rather difficult to get diagnosed with... yay.
 
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Spoke to my mom today about my predicament with vet school and how I need to get a Masters or some sort of additional degree/certificate in order to bring up my cGPA and last 45 to apply to vet school again in 2026. Was met with the expected answer "it's a waste of time", "i dont think vet med is it for you", "you're so brainwashed", "you'll be in a million dollars of debt with interest and never be able to live your life." I've explained that I have literally no choice because the schools will continue to dismiss my application regardless of the thousands of hours I've accrued in experiences. I cannot afford to take out more loans so I need to rethink my MPH route and apply for a Masters that I can both utilize in and out of vetmed and have it be paid for.

She was not supportive of this career path from the start, but I know if I got an acceptance to the last three schools I am waiting to hear back from (Penn IS, Cornell, CSU which to her means "status") she would be ecstatic but it's super competitive and I don't have the competitive GPA they require so I need to start planning my backup plan. I am only applying one more time before I throw in the towel and give up on this dream and I want to give myself the best shot possible. She wanted to go to med school and become a doctor but nobody pushed her to do it and chase after that dream, and now I feel like she is doing she same to me and even discouraging me from continuing.

I work in research rn and as much as I like it, I miss vet med. I miss working with animals, I miss working with clients, I miss the problem solving and diagnostics. I want to do both. I want to solve problems and work in research to combat zoonotic and foreign animal disease while working with animals. A government position somewhere in the department of Ag would be my best bet. But she doesn't want to hear it.

I'm asking her for some advice and guidance on what to do and I am just met with "Get your PhD and call it a day" but I don't want to!! I want this so bad. I have been talking about this career since I was 6 years old. I drew up my future vet clinic at 8 and told my mom all about the animals I would help. My interests have changed but my dedication and desire to be in this field has remained and stood the test of time. One bad year in college cost me everything. I wish I changed majors and stayed home so I didn't have that crappy junior year. Hindsight is 20/20 but whatever, nothing I can do about it now.

Im 22 with 3k to my name and 38k in debt not including the 4k on my credit card. I cant afford to pay OOP for a MPH which is what I originally wanted to do as it would help me in my career, and I cant afford to rack on the additional debt. I feel so hopeless and frustrated. I wish I had a little more support and guidance from the woman I look up to the most but every time we have this conversation, it turns into a fight.
 
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vampyrica said:
Spoke to my mom today about my predicament with vet school and how I need to get a Masters or some sort of additional degree/certificate in order to bring up my cGPA and last 45 to apply to vet school again in 2026. Was met with the expected answer "it's a waste of time", "i dont think vet med is it for you", "you're so brainwashed", "you'll be in a million dollars of debt with interest and never be able to live your life." I've explained that I have literally no choice because the schools will continue to dismiss my application regardless of the thousands of hours I've accrued in experiences. I cannot afford to take out more loans so I need to rethink my MPH route and apply for a Masters that I can both utilize in and out of vetmed and have it be paid for.

She was not supportive of this career path from the start, but I know if I got an acceptance to the last three schools I am waiting to hear back from (Penn IS, Cornell, CSU which to her means "status") she would be ecstatic but it's super competitive and I don't have the competitive GPA they require so I need to start planning my backup plan. I am only applying one more time before I throw in the towel and give up on this dream and I want to give myself the best shot possible. She wanted to go to med school and become a doctor but nobody pushed her to do it and chase after that dream, and now I feel like she is doing she same to me and even discouraging me from continuing.

I work in research rn and as much as I like it, I miss vet med. I miss working with animals, I miss working with clients, I miss the problem solving and diagnostics. I want to do both. I want to solve problems and work in research to combat zoonotic and foreign animal disease while working with animals. A government position somewhere in the department of Ag would be my best bet. But she doesn't want to hear it.

I'm asking her for some advice and guidance on what to do and I am just met with "Get your PhD and call it a day" but I don't want to!! I want this so bad. I have been talking about this career since I was 6 years old. I drew up my future vet clinic at 8 and told my mom all about the animals I would help. My interests have changed but my dedication and desire to be in this field has remained and stood the test of time. One bad year in college cost me everything. I wish I changed majors and stayed home so I didn't have that crappy junior year. Hindsight is 20/20 but whatever, nothing I can do about it now.

Im 22 with 3k to my name and 38k in debt not including the 4k on my credit card. I cant afford to pay OOP for a MPH which is what I originally wanted to do as it would help me in my career, and I cant afford to rack on the additional debt. I feel so hopeless and frustrated. I wish I had a little more support and guidance from the woman I look up to the most but every time we have this conversation, it turns into a fight.
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@vampyrica, I'm so sorry your calling to become a veterinarian has turned into a battle on multiple fronts. As if the scholastic challenge of getting into and through veterinary school wasn't difficult enough, add in the financial and family-based difficulties and it seems overwhelming.

To be honest, I see this from all sides. A bit of background... I'm a practicing optometrist with a daughter who is applying for veterinary school. This is her third round, and I keep track of information on SDN to help her. So I see both the applicant and the "Mom" perspective. Your Mom is likely scared of the financial implications of >$300k of debt will have on your quality of life for the next 30 years. I know I am for my daughter. Your Mom sees you're "doing all the right things" and not getting the outcome you want.

The one thing I would disagree with her (based on your information) is that getting a degree from a "status" school would make this acceptable. That's creating unnecessary expense. A DVM is a DVM, just like an OD is an OD. I've been in practice for 28 years. Trust me... no one cares where I went to school. They care about the level of care I provide.

There are less expensive and more expensive schools. I would be wary of any schools that are not accredited, or are in "probationary" status. But you don't have to go to a coast to get a good education... just a more expensive one.

I have a couple of thoughts, and they are just that. Please accept them as possibilities that may or may not work for you.
1. Have you considered finding an employment position in a state with a veterinary school with a more holistic application approach? Take a year (or more), establish residency, and apply to a school that is willing to look at the entire person and not just their GPA. I've known a lot of doctors in my time. Believe me when I say I'd much rather have the 3.0 GPA doctor who understands things don't always "look like the textbook" than the 4.0 GPA doctor who can't handle working with people.
2. The University of Missouri offers a masters program in public health (MPH) with a veterinary emphasis. I don't know anything in particular about the program, other than I've briefly looked at it for my daughter. It's an on-line program, so your costs would be less, and might give your GPA the boost you're looking for. There are likely other programs at other universities; this is just one I know about.

I wish you the best in this journey. I remember the tears I shed on mine. There is a path for you, @vampyrica. You'll find it. Let me know if I can help in it. 🙂
 
RCSEyeDoc96 said:
@vampyrica, I'm so sorry your calling to become a veterinarian has turned into a battle on multiple fronts. As if the scholastic challenge of getting into and through veterinary school wasn't difficult enough, add in the financial and family-based difficulties and it seems overwhelming.

To be honest, I see this from all sides. A bit of background... I'm a practicing optometrist with a daughter who is applying for veterinary school. This is her third round, and I keep track of information on SDN to help her. So I see both the applicant and the "Mom" perspective. Your Mom is likely scared of the financial implications of >$300k of debt will have on your quality of life for the next 30 years. I know I am for my daughter. Your Mom sees you're "doing all the right things" and not getting the outcome you want.

The one thing I would disagree with her (based on your information) is that getting a degree from a "status" school would make this acceptable. That's creating unnecessary expense. A DVM is a DVM, just like an OD is an OD. I've been in practice for 28 years. Trust me... no one cares where I went to school. They care about the level of care I provide.

There are less expensive and more expensive schools. I would be wary of any schools that are not accredited, or are in "probationary" status. But you don't have to go to a coast to get a good education... just a more expensive one.

I have a couple of thoughts, and they are just that. Please accept them as possibilities that may or may not work for you.
1. Have you considered finding an employment position in a state with a veterinary school with a more holistic application approach? Take a year (or more), establish residency, and apply to a school that is willing to look at the entire person and not just their GPA. I've known a lot of doctors in my time. Believe me when I say I'd much rather have the 3.0 GPA doctor who understands things don't always "look like the textbook" than the 4.0 GPA doctor who can't handle working with people.
2. The University of Missouri offers a masters program in public health (MPH) with a veterinary emphasis. I don't know anything in particular about the program, other than I've briefly looked at it for my daughter. It's an on-line program, so your costs would be less, and might give your GPA the boost you're looking for. There are likely other programs at other universities; this is just one I know about.

I wish you the best in this journey. I remember the tears I shed on mine. There is a path for you, @vampyrica. You'll find it. Let me know if I can help in it. 🙂
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Very sound advice. I concur. Not all roads are straight. Many have turns, potholes, or even temporarily closed at times. But, they are still roads and they lead somewhere. We all take different routes, some shorter/longer than the other. But, with hope and persistence, we end up at the same destination...and that is Vet School. Stay patient @vampyrica, things will unfold.
 
RCSEyeDoc96 said:
@vampyrica, I'm so sorry your calling to become a veterinarian has turned into a battle on multiple fronts. As if the scholastic challenge of getting into and through veterinary school wasn't difficult enough, add in the financial and family-based difficulties and it seems overwhelming.

To be honest, I see this from all sides. A bit of background... I'm a practicing optometrist with a daughter who is applying for veterinary school. This is her third round, and I keep track of information on SDN to help her. So I see both the applicant and the "Mom" perspective. Your Mom is likely scared of the financial implications of >$300k of debt will have on your quality of life for the next 30 years. I know I am for my daughter. Your Mom sees you're "doing all the right things" and not getting the outcome you want.

The one thing I would disagree with her (based on your information) is that getting a degree from a "status" school would make this acceptable. That's creating unnecessary expense. A DVM is a DVM, just like an OD is an OD. I've been in practice for 28 years. Trust me... no one cares where I went to school. They care about the level of care I provide.

There are less expensive and more expensive schools. I would be wary of any schools that are not accredited, or are in "probationary" status. But you don't have to go to a coast to get a good education... just a more expensive one.

I have a couple of thoughts, and they are just that. Please accept them as possibilities that may or may not work for you.
1. Have you considered finding an employment position in a state with a veterinary school with a more holistic application approach? Take a year (or more), establish residency, and apply to a school that is willing to look at the entire person and not just their GPA. I've known a lot of doctors in my time. Believe me when I say I'd much rather have the 3.0 GPA doctor who understands things don't always "look like the textbook" than the 4.0 GPA doctor who can't handle working with people.
2. The University of Missouri offers a masters program in public health (MPH) with a veterinary emphasis. I don't know anything in particular about the program, other than I've briefly looked at it for my daughter. It's an on-line program, so your costs would be less, and might give your GPA the boost you're looking for. There are likely other programs at other universities; this is just one I know about.

I wish you the best in this journey. I remember the tears I shed on mine. There is a path for you, @vampyrica. You'll find it. Let me know if I can help in it. 🙂
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Thank you so much for your kind words and advice. I know she is just looking out for me and wants me to be able to enjoy life and not be drowning in debts, but unfortunately this is the world we live in. I appreciate a mom's perspective on things. Currently I am not in a position to establish esidency elsewhere, but come Fall of 2025, I will be in a much better financial situation to move. Thank you again for your advice, I greatly appreciate it and I hope your daughter gets in! She is lucky to have such a kind mom 🙂
 
Petty rant: why do people come in at 2am for diarrhea when they can come in at 8am?

Should I complain? No. Is it still annoying since I said 2 seconds before their call about how I was going to lay down? Yes

Edit: okay, I take it back. The dog was super nice and the humans were super nice and it was all a nice time.
 
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battie said:
Petty rant: why do people come in at 2am for diarrhea when they can come in at 8am?

Should I complain? No. Is it still annoying since I said 2 seconds before their call about how I was going to lay down? Yes

Edit: okay, I take it back. The dog was super nice and the humans were super nice and it was all a nice time.
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I'm glad that the people were nice, lol

When I was a tech I would have people come to the ER at like 3am for tick removal.. like c'mon yall be fr
Also with the diarrhea- why is it an emergency NOW all of a sudden but wasnt an emergency 3hrs ago when it had be going on for days and your primary/urgent cares were open.. LOL
 
barkology said:
I'm glad that the people were nice, lol

When I was a tech I would have people come to the ER at like 3am for tick removal.. like c'mon yall be fr
Also with the diarrhea- why is it an emergency NOW all of a sudden but wasnt an emergency 3hrs ago when it had be going on for days and your primary/urgent cares were open.. LOL
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I'm ngl, my most frequently asked question in ER is "what prompted you to come in today for this issue - what changed or made it different today?"
 
I was prescribed metro after surgery for a separate infection (because my body thought healing the surgery site wasn’t interesting enough) and holy **** it is that bad. I took one last night and it went right down, no taste, no issues. This morning though? Dissolved instantly, got stuck, and flooded my tongue with the most vile thing I’ve ever tasted. I have more sympathy for the doggos that still get it prescribed for diarrhea. Your butthole hurts AND your mouth tastes like someone dipped it in acid.
 
_rae_ said:
I was prescribed metro after surgery for a separate infection (because my body thought healing the surgery site wasn’t interesting enough) and holy **** it is that bad. I took one last night and it went right down, no taste, no issues. This morning though? Dissolved instantly, got stuck, and flooded my tongue with the most vile thing I’ve ever tasted. I have more sympathy for the doggos that still get it prescribed for diarrhea. Your butthole hurts AND your mouth tastes like someone dipped it in acid.
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Same vein of thought: tramadol was the worst medication experience of my life and I only took one. I will never take it again.
 
Ranting because of how horrible this wait is to hear back from schools. So far I’ve heard back from 6/7, I wish I could just fast forward to February. It’s impossible to focus on finals right now haha
 
_rae_ said:
I was prescribed metro after surgery for a separate infection (because my body thought healing the surgery site wasn’t interesting enough) and holy **** it is that bad. I took one last night and it went right down, no taste, no issues. This morning though? Dissolved instantly, got stuck, and flooded my tongue with the most vile thing I’ve ever tasted. I have more sympathy for the doggos that still get it prescribed for diarrhea. Your butthole hurts AND your mouth tastes like someone dipped it in acid.
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Get some of those clear gelatin capsules that you can buy at a pharmacy and put your metro in those.

This trick also works with pets.
 
battie said:
Same vein of thought: tramadol was the worst medication experience of my life and I only took one. I will never take it again.
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Mirtazapine made me violently dizzy, did not help my sleep, and did not make me hungry. So it failed at like all the things it's supposed to do. Trazodone on the other hand works wonders.
 
I'm going to make it a new habit that whenever I get a medical bill, I'm going to ask for an actual itemized summary. Got a $456 bill from my PCP and there's nothing on the bill indicating what this should be for. And my health insurance's EOB is also less than helpful. I also hit my deductible and don't get why I'm getting bills that are hundreds of dollars. Health insurance is way too expensive per month for me to still be paying hundreds of dollars in bills.
 
supershorty said:
Get some of those clear gelatin capsules that you can buy at a pharmacy and put your metro in those.

This trick also works with pets.
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I routinely send people home with a couple pill pockets not necessarily to get the dog to eat the pill on their own, but just to be used to coat the outside of gross meds so they don't hate you for shoving it.
 
Trilt said:
I routinely send people home with a couple pill pockets not necessarily to get the dog to eat the pill on their own, but just to be used to coat the outside of gross meds so they don't hate you for shoving it.
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I wonder what flavor of pill pocket would be best for rae :thinking:
 
lost my wallet, going to have to pay to replace everything, 4th (basically 6th since others are interview waitlists) school rejection, and I have to do multiple things that involve showing my license (which is in said wallet). sometimes you just wish something good instead of bad would happen
 
I am so tired of being the butt of jokes at parties, get togethers, etc. My husband and I have 8 animals - 5 cats, 1 dog, a rabbit, and a turtle. Two of those cats were his prior to our marriage, and we've only added one animal since we've been married (a kitten I hand raised). We keep our house clean, and it doesn't smell. Our animals are fed and get the care they need. When people ask, we don't hide what we have because why would we?

Being a vet, I expect a certain gamut of questions, being a zoo vet I also expect a few 2-3 more specific ones that are invariably asked in these situations. No big deal. We went to my husband's work party this past weekend and there was a good 20-30min spent on how we are hoarders, I bet your house reeks, why not just have kids, 8 animals is insane, etc.

The thing is that if we had 8 kids, no one would ever say their opinions about that to our faces. I think three kids is too many (personal opinion for what I want in my life), but if I said that to his coworker with three kids who is roasting us, I'd be the a**hole. And honestly, as someone with no kids atm and is highly likely t be unable to have a child naturally, yes, these animals are our family.

It was bad enough that his senior boss (so someone 2-3 levels above him) who was at the party felt compelled enough to pull my husband aside at work today and apologize on behalf of the entire group at the party. Which is nice and we appreciate, but we are still left to feel crappy even though we weren't the ones being rude. My mind will never not be boggled over how completely rude some people can be.
 
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oweue said:
lost my wallet, going to have to pay to replace everything, 4th (basically 6th since others are interview waitlists) school rejection, and I have to do multiple things that involve showing my license (which is in said wallet). sometimes you just wish something good instead of bad would happen
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update: wallet has been found so perhaps throwing this out to the universe made something a little easier
 
pp9 said:
why not just have kids
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This makes my blood boil for you 😡. I desperately want children but the process for me to have them is going to be long, expensive, and probably painful if it's even possible at all. I hate discussing it with other people because they get all quiet like I've said something wrong and it's like, "dude, you brought it up. Don't ask questions if you don't want to know answers." I'm sorry you got treated like this, it's super not okay.
 
_rae_ said:
I hate discussing it with other people because they get all quiet like I've said something wrong and it's like, "dude, you brought it up. Don't ask questions if you don't want to know answers."
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100%. If you're going to ask me stupid things, you get to hear about my failing ovaries and every single other physical ailment my PCOS has forced upon me that will not only make conceiving difficult/impossible, but also potentially dangerous. It's an even bigger conversation killer when you bring up the growing evidence that links childhood trauma and PCOS, which for me, is spot on. Not to mention the serious financial concerns about bringing expensive humans into this world right now, whether naturally or with medical assistance....

Ugh. I just hate it. I could never imagine asking someone 'why haven't you had kids? Are you going to have kids?' Like that information is not something I've ever cared to know about in a friend, family member, etc. If they choose to talk about it, fine. But is that something I need to know to be able to function in my daily life? No.
 
pp9 said:
I am so tired of being the butt of jokes at parties, get togethers, etc. My husband and I have 8 animals - 5 cats, 1 dog, a rabbit, and a turtle. Two of those cats were his prior to our marriage, and we've only added one animal since we've been married (a kitten I hand raised). We keep our house clean, and it doesn't smell. Our animals are fed and get the care they need. When people ask, we don't hide what we have because why would we?

Being a vet, I expect a certain gamut of questions, being a zoo vet I also expect a few 2-3 more specific ones that are invariably asked in these situations. No big deal. We went to my husband's work party this past weekend and there was a good 20-30min spent on how we are hoarders, I bet your house reeks, why not just have kids, 8 animals is insane, etc.

The thing is that if we had 8 kids, no one would ever say their opinions about that to our faces. I think three kids is too many (personal opinion for what I want in my life), but if I said that to his coworker with three kids who is roasting us, I'd be the a**hole. And honestly, as someone with no kids atm and is highly likely t be unable to have a child naturally, yes, these animals are our family.

It was bad enough that his senior boss (so someone 2-3 levels above him) who was at the party felt compelled enough to pull my husband aside at work today and apologize on behalf of the entire group at the party. Which is nice and we appreciate, but we are still left to feel crappy even though we weren't the ones being rude. My mind will never not be boggled over how completely rude some people can be.
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They do realize kids are messy and often sticky and leave toys and books and all sorts of things everywhere? I hate that people think animals = dirty. Have these people not seen the messes kids can make?

It is all about how the individual person cares for their environment, not what's in the environment that counts.
 
DVMDream said:
They do realize kids are messy and often sticky and leave toys and books and all sorts of things everywhere? I hate that people think animals = dirty. Have these people not seen the messes kids can make?

It is all about how the individual person cares for their environment, not what's in the environment that counts.
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You and I realize that :laugh: I personally believe that there are a good number of parents out there that think their kids are the perfect, cutest little creatures and could never do anything wrong, all while they are throwing food, drawing on walls, playing with their own ****, etc. My own sister comes to mind.

That's not to say that I think all parents have their heads in the sand - I don't. But when someone with kids tells me my house must be practically condemnable, all while I see toys everywhere, patched walls and paint, food buried in couches, stained carpets, etc....I start to wonder where the delusion started.
 
I hurt my hand a few weeks ago. It’s a tendon injury to my thumb on my dominant hand that is limiting mobility and my grip strength. Apparently, I now have to start hand therapy and possibly see a hand surgeon. This sucks because I want to be a surgeon eventually so I hope it heals well 🙁
 
pp9 said:
You and I realize that :laugh: I personally believe that there are a good number of parents out there that think their kids are the perfect, cutest little creatures and could never do anything wrong, all while they are throwing food, drawing on walls, playing with their own ****, etc. My own sister comes to mind.

That's not to say that I think all parents have their heads in the sand - I don't. But when someone with kids tells me my house must be practically condemnable, all while I see toys everywhere, patched walls and paint, food buried in couches, stained carpets, etc....I start to wonder where the delusion started.
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I have both kids and animals. Kids are TERRORS to houses. I love all of them, both my four legged and two legged babies, but they are equally as able to destroy. My male dog and my kiddos are the reason I pull my hair out at home. My MIL thinks my house is a disaster because of the dogs but truthfully it’s her grandchildren.

Also my house is not a disaster, that’s just her opinion because we have animals and she does not.
 
BLOT0411 said:
I have both kids and animals. Kids are TERRORS to houses. I love all of them, both my four legged and two legged babies, but they are equally as able to destroy. My male dog and my kiddos are the reason I pull my hair out at home. My MIL thinks my house is a disaster because of the dogs but truthfully it’s her grandchildren.

Also my house is not a disaster, that’s just her opinion because we have animals and she does not.
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This also reminds me how annoying it is that renters have to pay monthly 'pet rent' and non-refundable pet deposits for presumed damages to the apartment, but kids are allowed to destroy apartments for free.

My last apartment even charged me to 'deflea' my apartment even though I showed my proof of flea preventative purchases, physical exam records, everything. So dumb.
 
BLOT0411 said:
I have both kids and animals. Kids are TERRORS to houses. I love all of them, both my four legged and two legged babies, but they are equally as able to destroy. My male dog and my kiddos are the reason I pull my hair out at home. My MIL thinks my house is a disaster because of the dogs but truthfully it’s her grandchildren.

Also my house is not a disaster, that’s just her opinion because we have animals and she does not.
Click to expand...
We originally wanted 2 kids. We've changed to one and done partly because how much more work kids are individually and with two mid to large breed dogs. When my golden goes, we won't get a second dog. Even with my nifty house husband, it's hard to keep up.

My husband thinks our house gets too messy and such between the three of them (now that he's primarily responsible 🤣). Based on my friends with phenomenal but chaotic multiple children/pets, I assure him regularly we're doing just fine.
 
pp9 said:
This also reminds me how annoying it is that renters have to pay monthly 'pet rent' and non-refundable pet deposits for presumed damages to the apartment, but kids are allowed to destroy apartments for free.
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I'm so ready for us to go Canada's route where no landlord can prohibit pets. Ontario doesn't even allow pet fees to my understanding. Why do I have to pay $30-$60/month/freaking cat when my neighbor with three kids just pays standard rent? I assure you, my cats are way cleaner on the carpet than any child is.
battie said:
We originally wanted 2 kids. We've changed to one and done partly because how much more work kids are individually and with two mid to large breed dogs. When my golden goes, we won't get a second dog. Even with my nifty house husband, it's hard to keep up.

My husband thinks our house gets too messy and such between the three of them (now that he's primarily responsible 🤣). Based on my friends with phenomenal but chaotic multiple children/pets, I assure him regularly we're doing just fine.
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I used to want 4 😳. I was the baby of three and felt like you could avoid the middle child thing by having an even split. My fiancé convinced me that you could more easily avoid the middle child thing if you never go past two 🤣.
 
_rae_ said:
I'm so ready for us to go Canada's route where no landlord can prohibit pets. Ontario doesn't even allow pet fees to my understanding. Why do I have to pay $30-$60/month/freaking cat when my neighbor with three kids just pays standard rent? I assure you, my cats are way cleaner on the carpet than any child is.

I used to want 4 😳. I was the baby of three and felt like you could avoid the middle child thing by having an even split. My fiancé convinced me that you could more easily avoid the middle child thing if you never go past two 🤣.
Click to expand...

As the second oldest (and one of the middle children) in a set of 4, I have 3 sisters, yeah middle child syndrome is still very real.
 
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