I am with you, friend. It is my second application cycle, so I am living proof that it will be okay even if you don't get in! (Since you said you're still in school, I presume it's your first cycle but please forgive me if I am wrong) I honestly have really enjoyed the year I spent between cycles, the full-time experience was really good for me. A break from school was awesome, not gonna lie. Butttt, I don't want to do it again. So, I am also feeling that anxiety and at this point, obsession.
To rant a little for myself, so definitely skip the rest of this post if you need to, I don't wanna pile on haha. one point of contention for applying for a third cycle is having to ask for letters again. Like cool, being out of school for two years and trying to get that professor to write me a letter is super awkward. Plus, having to ask a doctor for a third time.. yikes. I could find new doctors to write for me, I suppose, but like where do I find a new professor? That's one anxiety I have been holding onto for a while. The other thing is.. I just want to start my life. I cannot afford to live as a veterinary assistant, at least not for right now. I am living with family now which I feel fortunate to do but it has felt like this huge step backwards in my life because I was on my own during undergrad thanks to scholarships/some student loans/part-time work. Many of my friends are making those big steps in life and I feel stuck, or even backwards. I just don't want to go through this for a third time, I need this time to work out, fortunately I have just a few more schools I am waiting on.
That said, that's why I do like SDN. It is kind of an isolating experience to go through this, I don't know anyone pre-vet IRL (honestly didn't vibe with my pre-vet club because it just felt competitive). It is nice to get advice or insight from others, orrr just commiserate every now and again. But, you gotta know when to unplug and I, myself, am struggling with that. But, we can do it! I think I will try to actually read a book this evening haha.