Things I Learn from My Patients.

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I've learned.....

That it is perfectly acceptable to grab unmixed amoxicillin out of my hand and run away with it if you have enough money to buy 3 packs of cigarettes but not enough for the copay on your sons prescription. It is also acceptable to throw said amoxicillin at me when I tell you I am going to call the police.

That an intelligent answer to the question "Date of birth?" is "Do you want my date of birth or the patients?"....I'd like your date of birth dumb a@# so I can send you a bag of dog poo on your birthday for giving me the headache you just gave me!!
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One of my favorites- "What is your home phone # sir/ma'am?" reply "well I'm not there now would you like my cell #" Okay genius think before you talk, I don't want to call you just need the information to match your profile. DUH! :confused:

Another encounter with the brilliant public in the drive thru always leaves me wondering how people survive day to day. MD's office calls in Levaquin at about 5:30pm; pt comes to pick it up and has the $10 in her had along with talking on her cell phone. When told her co-pay is $49.95 due to brand name and meeting part of her deductible, she proceeds to argue with me that the MD said she could get generic. She's then told to her dismay that it is not available in a generic. Her reply was we should have called the MD's office back and tell them it was not generic and ask for another drug available in generic because they stated "generic allowed" on the phone in RX- and demands that we do this now at 6:30pm. Apparently she does not live in the real world and has her own logic because it sure does not match with anyone else's in the medical profession. Don't you just want to strangle them sometimes?! :wow:
 
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It is not wise to call the store and say “Fill my “Ibpropan” and hang up.” First who are you and second what’s ibpropan?

If you’ve had a car wreck and your upper body is bruised it is not appropriate to lift up your shirt in the store and show me EXACTLY where it’s bruised.

No, we will not deliver and NO, one of those pretty blondes won’t be the one to do it!

If you lean over the counter to watch us fill your Rx’s that will make us work even faster to accommodate you. :rolleyes:
 
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Actual stories:

Me: You're copay is $25
Pt: WHAT?! I'VE ALWAYS PAID $10!
Me: Look at his profile, umm no, the past 2 months it's been $25
Pt: Well why'd you change it?!
Me: I didn't, your insurance co. did, and if you think there's a mistake you need to contact them.

Me: (Ring the pt up with meds and a tabloid) Ma'am, you're total comes to $87.50
Woman: I only have $85 in my checking account
Me: well, you could not get the magazine and then it'd be under $85
Woman: but I'd just die if I didn't get to read it
Me: Well then you could give up one of your meds
Woman: how about the amoxil
Me: that's an antibiotic, you really should take that
Woman: okay, I guess I'll put the tabloid back :eek:
 
Me: X pharmacy, how may I help you?
Pt: I would like to get a refill from Dr. B. I think I do have refills left..... (after 1 minute of telling me her life story)

Silence.....

Me: ok, what's your name?
Pt: Johnson....

Silence

Me: ooo....k.... what's your first name?
Pt: (first name)

Silence

Me: uh.... what do you need?
Pt: I don't know.. it's from Dr. B
Me: well, you do have a lot of medications that are due for refills, so I can't refill the one you want if you don't know what it is.
Pt: well, it's for my blood pressure
Me: well, you do have a few for blood pressure.
Pt: o... I think it's called Lip..... something
Me: oh, you mean Lipitor?
Pt: yes yes yes..
Me: oh.. it's for cholesterol, but i'll fill that for you. you're all set.:p
 
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When the Dr. signs under 'Substitution Permissible' on a prescription for Norvasc does not mean you can "substitute" it for Percocet instead.

Heres how the conversation went:
Patient: Can I get percocet instead because Norvasc gives me a headache.

Me: Umm...no ma'am the prescription is written for Norvasc not Percocet

Patient: But they're both for pain and it says right here (points to the prescription) 'Substitution Permissible' and the Dr. signed it!!!

Me (trying not to laugh at her stupidity): That means we can substitute for generic...Percocet is a totally different pain medication.

Pissed off and confused patient: Whatever...I'm going to another pharmacy.
 
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GrignardRX said:
When the Dr. signs under 'Substitution Permissible' on a prescription for Norvasc does not mean you can "substitute" it for Percocet instead.

Heres how the conversation went:
Patient: Can I get percocet instead because Norvasc gives me a headache.

Me: Umm...no ma'am the prescription is written for Norvasc not Percocet

Patient: But they're both for pain and it says right here (points to the prescription) 'Substitution Permissible' and the Dr. signed it!!!

Me (trying not to laugh at her stupidity): That means we can substitute for generic...Percocet is a totally different pain medication.

Pissed off and confused patient: Whatever...I'm going to another pharmacy.
Click to expand...

crazy people... first of all, norvasc is for blood pressure, not for pain
good luck to her.
 
Me: So how many do you have?
PT: It's for vicodin, another is for adderall, etc. etc.
Me: (thinking) Dude, I just want to know how many bottles to look for with your name on them! Just give me a simple number! 2 bottles? 3 bottle?
 
an interesting phone call:

male patient: I have kind of an embarassing question. How would I know if I have endometriosis? Is it contagious?
me: Well, it's a disease that affects an organ that only women have, so you can't get endometriosis.
male patient: Are you sure? Like, even if I had sex with a woman who had it, I couldn't get it then? Not even a little chance?
me: Absolutely not.
male patient: (still sounding nervous): Oh. Okay. Thanks.
 
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savvysearch said:
Me: So how many do you have?
PT: It's for vicodin, another is for adderall, etc. etc.
Me: (thinking) Dude, I just want to know how many bottles to look for with your name on them! Just give me a simple number! 2 bottles? 3 bottle?
Click to expand...
Sounds like you can use some xanax
 
ocd crazy patient who comes in once a week: hi i want that nice guy tech over there to ring me out.
cashier: uhhh.. ok hold on. (thinking crazy lady knows him personally)
tech: how can i help you?
crazy lady: i need to pick up some drugs for (says her name)
tech: (gets rx, looks at the 30 dy supply of valtrex shes getting)
crazy lady: oh no, thats not for me, thats for my mother. :scared:
 
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Caverject said:
Sounds like you can use some xanax
Click to expand...

I could definitely use xanax. Especially when it take them forever to name about 5 different drugs, when all they have to say is the number 5.
 
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Caverject said:
Sounds like you can use some xanax
Click to expand...

Believe me, when they're naming about 7 different drugs sometimes naming generic and brand as two different types, youre looking on the computer and the shelf for one more bottle that doesn't even exist!
 
I've gotten ...
"I need my little round white pill"
"I need my pills that start with an A...and I need to know what beer is on sale this week"
"i need something that's gonna clean out my liver"
and my ultimate fave......"I need my anthrax refilled"
I said darlin' if your doctor wrote you a prescription for anthrax I think you need to find another doctor.
 
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Had a FOB come in once and dropped off a script. We filled it (can't remember the drug) and at checkout, he asks (in broken english):

FOB : This isn't mine.
Me : Yes it is... this is a generic (pulled out sheet and showed him) and the doctor ok'ed it
FOB : No... I don't want the fake one. I want the real one.

I tried to explain to him that it's the same and it's cheaper.... but whatever.

Same thing happened later with a different customer and this time there was no brand name. The pharmacist tried to explain that the brand name hasn't been sold in 30 years or so. But he didn't understand... Got mad and said he would go to a different pharm.... whatever
 
Me:hungover:o you have any questions for the pharmacist?
Patient: do I need to know anything important?
Pharmacist: dont mix this medication with alcohol.
patient: well....ahhh...what if I just had a few drinks about an hour ago? (Patient is picking meds up at the drive-through window)
 
patient comes to the consultation window

pharmacist: can i help you?
patient: what can i do if i have a tapeworm?
pharmacist: if you think you have a tapeworm you should go see your doctor
patient: well isn't there something you can give me?
pharmacist: i really feel you should see your doctor and go from there
patient: but see, (proceeds to open a bowl with a lid on it) this came out of my poop!(disgusting worm things in bowl, gross!) does it look like a tapeworm?
pharmacist: (practically faints)....take THAT to your doctor and see what he has to say about it
patient: well, i really was hoping not to have to go to the doctor, are you sure there isn't any other option?

another favorite is the lice one....bends thier head over the counter parts thier hair with thier hands "does this look like lice to you" yeah thanks for scattering it all about my counter, go get some rid!
 
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this thread is hilarious! anymore ppl? reading this thread is like watching a comedy central version of pharmacy. i need to do something entertaining while taking breaks from my essays
 
Everyday we all can come home and bitch about how horrible retail pharmacy is. However, it is not every job that can give us stories. Retail sure beats anything to do with a forklift or a 10-key numerical pad.
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AMEN!
 
Customer yelling at male pharmacist with plenty of other customers/children around: "Do you know what it's like to have a YEAST INFECTION?!? And not be able to sleep because you have a yeast infection????!!! May your balls rot in hell!!!!!"

Meanwhile all the techs and clerks are hiding their faces from this woman and all the other customers look stunned.
 
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Got this one last week

Customer:"My rx was for Percocet but I got this oxycodone stuff"
Me: "yes ma'm it is generic for Percocet your physcian authorized the use of generic"
Customer: "I don't believe in generics they're left-overs. Next time I want the real thing"
Me: stifling laughter "okay I will mark your file that you don't want generics"
hang up and laugh and laugh
 
Last week I learned that it's ok to tie up the drive-thru window for 10 minutes having a heated conversation about why we can't find your prescriptions that you claim were dropped off yesterday, making the pharmacy staff search everywhere, and then finally mentioning that "maybe it's in your computer under a different name".
 
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oh, i'm sorry, u say u LOST your vicodin #100 prescription when u left the pharmacy, u want another refill? Sure, while i'm at it, would u like a sealed bottle of percocet? We have a buy 1 get 1 free deal going on....limited time offer. HAHA

OR

I have to WAIT! Can't u just slap a label on it?

HAHAH I love this.
 
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loo said:
1. My ex-girlfriend/boyfriend broke in my house and stole them.
Click to expand...

A "degenerate drug addicted family "friend" " actually did steal the Tylenol 3's I got when my wisdom teeth were pulled. Never finished due to the fact that upset stomach doesn't go well with sucking down blood and the taste of gauze.
I found out about a year later that he replaced them with Aspirin. :mad:

Trying to get refills on that account is pretty damn stupid though...
 
Ok, so it's not pharmacy, but if it belongs anywhere, it should go here. I work for the natural gas utility in southern Cal. I had a guy call in once who wanted us to check for carbon monoxide because it smelled really bad in his apartment. He didn't want us to check his apt though. He wanted us to check his neighbors apt because his neighbor was burning INCEST. I asked him (just for clarification) Your neighbor is burning incense. "Yes, my neighbor's burning incest." Well, I'm sorry we can't check your neighbors house for carbon monoxide just because your neighbor's burning incense, but if you'd like to call the manager, maybe they can check for you and tell him to stop.

Of course we also had a guy call in because he heard hissing outside right after he shot a snake in his yard. We sent a guy out to check for a gas leak and guess what was hissing. The stupid snake:idea:
 
I've learned that a small sense of empathy and compassion can go a very long way for my patients and litterally effect their lives.
 
" I thought that line that was crossed in the refill area meant infinity!"
 
Guest: "Where's the Toprol over the counter?"
Me: "Oh, Toprol is prescription only. It's not over the counter."
Guest: "Yes it is."
Me: "No, it's not"
Guest: "Yes it is"
Me: "Sir, it's prescription only..."
Guest: "No, it IS over the counter" [walks away...]

:mad:
 
Ever notice that sometimes nurses can be the hardest people to deal with as customers?

Pt: "I'm here to pick up 2 rx's"
Pharmacist: "I only have 1 ready for you"
Pt: "I dropped off 2 separate rx's"
Pharmacist locates 2nd rx in the CMD/problem drawer
Pharmacist: "I've found the 2nd rx there is a problem with it and we will have to call the md in the morning"
Pt: "well I'm a nurse what is the problem?"
Pharmacist: "Well the Dr has written just "Lortabs" on the rx"
Pt (now w/ nurse attitude): "well what is the problem with that"
Pharmacist (tired of smart aleck nurse): "Well being a nurse you should know that Lortab comes in several different strengths and the Dr has to specify which one he wants":laugh:
Pt took rx back and left pharmacy drive thru. I wouldn't put it past her to write her own strength on it and try to fill it elsewhere!
 
ok, i heard this from a friend who works at wal-mart

pt: I heard walmart has this $4 generic program.
rph: yes.
pt: so how much is the $4 generic?
rph: $4 (DUH!!!!!!!)
 
"Pulls up to the drive-thru in a cadillac escalade (mercedes benz, bmw, etc.) all pimped out. You ask for insurance and they hand you....?" Medicaid. I hate those jerks. It's a slap in the face.:mad:
 
I have to WAIT! Can't u just slap a label on it?

HAHAH I love this.[/quote]


Some lady said something similar on Friday. "I'm missing a prescription." me- Which one?....It'll be 10-15 minutes. lady- "But it's just a nose spray?"
 
PharmDstudent said:
"Pulls up to the drive-thru in a cadillac escalade (mercedes benz, bmw, etc.) all pimped out. You ask for insurance and they hand you....?" Medicaid. I hate those jerks. It's a slap in the face.:mad:
Click to expand...


I have a medicaid patient that has to have brand name Ritalin....and medicaid pays for it:eek: :eek:
 
No lie, I actually had a lady call one day and say she picked up her kids reconstituted anitbiotic and tell me that the safety seal was broken.........how else was I supposed to get the water in there?????:idea:
 
My favorites from today....

"I'm allergic to the blue dye in the generic lorcet 10, so could I substitute for some generic percocet 10s instead?"

"What do you mean TennCare is no longer paying for Soma? But I need them for my medical condition!" (Patient is taking 1T;QID:pRN, and trying to refill them 9 days early)
 
Last weekend - first call - did you find my percocet I left in the cart?

Me: no, nothing was turned into the pharmacy.

Well - I know I left it there -you need to check.

Me: no, there are too many carts to check..when did you leave it?

After I picked it up from you last night - about 5PM (I worked that evening).

And....after checking our CII records - we haven't filled a percocet since the end of Dec.

Me: Sir...your percocet was not filled here & I didn't give it to you last night.

Let me talk to your manager....

Me: Call Mon AM

Next thing I know....the folks in customer service are calling - can I replace a percocet rx the pt lost?

Me: hmmmmmm - nah.....don't think so!
 
saradempsey said:
I have a medicaid patient that has to have brand name Ritalin....and medicaid pays for it:eek: :eek:
Click to expand...

My oldest son was on methyphenidate (generic Ritalin) and his pediatrician ALWAYS asked if I thought it was working as well as the brand-name which he'd started on. I did. Apparently it doesn't for everyone. I've had generic medications cause side effects that the brand name didn't cause -- and yes, my insurance company had to pony up for the difference. Maybe there is a real reason this particular patient needs the brand name.
 
I work with a tech who is as dumb as my patients. She asks me to allow this guy to wait on his medication of Viagra 100mg. I ask her why, and she replies, "I don't want to ruin his night." :mad:

"I need a refill on this Cialis, it's my heart medication and I could die without it." Not being able to hold an erection is not grounds for me to rush your medication, sorry.

"My baby is sick, so I need to wait on this..." Every fool that comes through the pharmacy is ailing in some way, boo. Your child is not the last.

I really hate when I tell someone that the wait time is an hour, and they go to the next window, tell the pharmacist, who then says "I will get it right out for you.":eek:

"Do ya'll have Promethazine w/codeine? I have to have the PURPLE kind." Does it make a difference? If you are really sick, you'll take whatever I give you dumba$$.

"Seroquel will get you high as hell!" Oh, will it really? Another dumb customer.
 
"I'm on Medicaid. How much will my prescription cost?" If you are on TX medicaid, boo, you're prescription is free. So that was a really stupid question...

"Medicaid don't cova' dat!" "Ma'am, it's over the counter." "What does that mean? I don't want it then." Well, I guess your child is not that sick, and you are full of it. How did you pay for those gold-copper-bronze teeth in your mouth???
 
"Can you loan me some pills until payday?" WTF??? Does this look like the First National Bank of Drugs up in here? What's really going on?

"I have to have brand name Vicodin, because I'm allergic to the generic. What? It's 128.99? Nah, give me the generic!" I thought you were allergic...Nevermind.

"Did my doctor call in my prescription for Xanax? Is it the handlebar? I have to have the handlebar!" Street name, come on now, that is so phony!
 
ha, this thread should be renamed Venting Your Frustrations.
 
chicafarmacista said:
"Can you loan me some pills until payday?" WTF??? Does this look like the First National Bank of Drugs up in here? What's really going on?

"I have to have brand name Vicodin, because I'm allergic to the generic. What? It's 128.99? Nah, give me the generic!" I thought you were allergic...Nevermind.

"Did my doctor call in my prescription for Xanax? Is it the handlebar? I have to have the handlebar!" Street name, come on now, that is so phony!
Click to expand...

too funny:laugh: :laugh:
 
There was a lady that came into our pharmacy a couple days ago with two prescriptions, one for an antibiotic and the other for Percodan (a med our pharmacy doesn't carry). When she came to pick up the prescriptions, I politely explained to her that we didn't carry the Percodan, but that she could get it filled at another pharmacy if she wanted. Ok. Fine.

2 minutes later...

An angry old man walks up to drop-off, slams the Rx on the counter and proceeds to yell:

Man: "What do you mean you can't fill a prescription for Percocet? What kind of pharmacy doesn't carry Percocet? We've gotten it here before!"

Tech: "Sir, that's not percocet, that's percodan & we don't carry that medication."

Man: "But we've gotten it here before! See?" *holds up generic equivalent of Percocet filled 2 days before*

Tech: "Sir, that's the generic for PercoCET. This Rx is written for PercoDAN."

Man: "Yeah, and?? "

Tech: "And...we can't fill it!!":eek:

Man: "But they're the same! She's been on this medication before! I know what I'm talking about, damnit! She really needs these meds! "

Tech: "Well, then I suggest you get back out to the car and hand her that bottle you have in your hand, seeing as she has 20 tablets left & you're currently the only thing keeping her from them..."

*angry man walks away muttering random nothingness a/b the stupidity of America's youth*

----------------------------------

I tell ya, in just 1 year of pharmacy experience, I've definitely learned to hate stupid people who think they know everything and refuse to take no as an answer...:mad:
 
this thread is hilarious...jus thought id share a lil story

this lady comes in to pick up her advair n she's breathing really hard n coughing all over the place. she needed some immediately so she asked us to show her how to use it so the pharmacist pulls out a sample n shows her how. she then grabs the sample n inhales from it n holds her breath. she totally acted as if it was working! we're all lookin at her like huh?...haha. the pharmacist then tells her 'uh...yah tha's a sample...i never opened ur advair'...the look on her face was priceless!
 
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