Female medical student and feeling like I will be forever alone

[studentp0x]

What damage though? I'm a male in my 30s and I feel a lot better physically, emotionally, and intellectually than I did in my 20s. There's plenty of single women in their 30s who are the same. People are so obsessed with relationships these days but the reality is that relationships pretty much suck and having kids is not easy work.

Well obviously partying takes a toll on the body so that's the physical aspect. Emotionally, women who had big party phases and slept around a lot more than likely have lost an ability "to bond." (Actually had two older women tell me this) It's more difficult for them to truly bond and stay monogamous for 40 years with someone if they've slept around/been cheated on/used/taken advantage of, etc. Hell, I've seen 18 year old chicks with these issues. Can only imagine what a single 32 year old woman is like.

On another note, I remember being on plentyofish a couple years back. Talked to plenty of women who were 30-45, and one thing they all had in common (which I found out after talking quite a bit) was they were getting sexual with 3 guys a week or so.

Seems like quite a few issues.

---

Members don't see this ad.

 

[514901]

Well obviously partying takes a toll on the body so that's the physical aspect. Emotionally, women who had big party phases and slept around a lot more than likely have lost an ability "to bond." (Actually had two older women tell me this) It's more difficult for them to truly bond and stay monogamous for 40 years with someone if they've slept around/been cheated on/used/taken advantage of, etc. Hell, I've seen 18 year old chicks with these issues. Can only imagine what a single 32 year old woman is like.

On another note, I remember being on plentyofish a couple years back. Talked to plenty of women who were 30-45, and one thing they all had in common (which I found out after talking quite a bit) was they were getting sexual with 3 guys a week or so.

Seems like quite a few issues.

Yeah, I can't really argue with this, but there are a number of women out there in their 30s who simply didn't want marriage, etc. and have a good head on their shoulders and never really had big party days. It's not terribly common but they are out there.

You cannot win either way though. I'd personally rather have someone who has experienced life and know what she likes and wants versus someone who is too desperate for approval and has always been in relationships and quite frankly has little to offer personality-wise.

 

[Stellar Clouds]

Dude, no matter how perfect the woman may seem or be, a guy will always want more. That's the nature of man.

Wow...that's a truly depressing outlook you have

 

[514901]

Wow...that's a truly depressing outlook you have

No it's a realistic and a content outlook. Nobody is perfect and if you think you're going to find someone like that or that you have someone like that you're going to get the shock of your life sooner or later. I put my faith in myself and in no one else, and if I find someone suitable then it's only a bonus.

 

[studentp0x]

Yeah, I can't really argue with this, but there are a number of women out there in their 30s who simply didn't want marriage, etc. and have a good head on their shoulders and never really had big party days. It's not terribly common but they are out there.

You cannot win either way though. I'd personally rather have someone who has experienced life and know what she likes and wants versus someone who is too desperate for approval and has always been in relationships and quite frankly has little to offer personality-wise.

Yea there are such women, but it's just hard to find women who are 30+ and are still very attractive. Your typical decent looking girl gets inboxed all the time on facebook by random guys, gets hit on in public, etc. etc. Your typical attractive girl, even more. And eventually she's bound to like some of them at least and end up with someone ultimately. You don't have to be married to be committed to someone long term.

And generally I don't believe there's endless trial and error. People want their partner to be trust worthy, and to respect them, provide affection etc. People also know what they find attractive. So when it comes to relationships, women definitely know what they want. They just don't know if they want to be single or not .

Other day a 24 year old chick tells me "im too young to be in a relationship (she has a 3.98 GPA, is a decent 7/10 girl, and has had a bf for over a year", I just wanna party and see different guys casually." Felt bad for the girls bf, must suck that your gf wants to get railed by randoms.

 

[tantacles]

Yea there are such women, but it's just hard to find women who are 30+ and are still very attractive. Your typical decent looking girl gets inboxed all the time on facebook by random guys, gets hit on in public, etc. etc. Your typical attractive girl, even more. And eventually she's bound to like some of them at least and end up with someone ultimately. You don't have to be married to be committed to someone long term.

And generally I don't believe there's endless trial and error. People want their partner to be trust worthy, and to respect them, provide affection etc. People also know what they find attractive. So when it comes to relationships, women definitely know what they want. They just don't know if they want to be single or not .

Other day a 24 year old chick tells me "im too young to be in a relationship (she has a 3.98 GPA, is a decent 7/10 girl, and has had a bf for over a year", I just wanna party and see different guys casually." Felt bad for the girls bf, must suck that your gf wants to get railed by randoms.

Actually, it's quite easy to find 30+ women who are attractive; the thing is, though, many of those women are going to be married or in relationships, just as many men in the 30+ club are.

 

[514901]

Yea there are such women, but it's just hard to find women who are 30+ and are still very attractive. Your typical decent looking girl gets inboxed all the time on facebook by random guys, gets hit on in public, etc. etc. Your typical attractive girl, even more. And eventually she's bound to like some of them at least and end up with someone ultimately. You don't have to be married to be committed to someone long term.

And generally I don't believe there's endless trial and error. People want their partner to be trust worthy, and to respect them, provide affection etc. People also know what they find attractive. So when it comes to relationships, women definitely know what they want. They just don't know if they want to be single or not .

Other day a 24 year old chick tells me "im too young to be in a relationship (she has a 3.98 GPA, is a decent 7/10 girl, and has had a bf for over a year", I just wanna party and see different guys casually." Felt bad for the girls bf, must suck that your gf wants to get railed by randoms.

Let me let you in on something--ALL women crave BBC

 

[studentp0x]

Actually, it's quite easy to find 30+ women who are attractive; the thing is, though, many of those women are going to be married or in relationships, just as many men in the 30+ club are.

woops, I meant single non-divorced women.

Let me let you in on something--ALL women crave BBC

Nah, some chicks definitely don't like black guys. Kind of hard to be sexually attracted if you're basically racist.


On topic of marriage, the whole sexual revolution led to our super high 50% divorce rate. On the other hand, cultures with virgins brides (and usually virgin husbands) have like a 5% divorce rate? Just food for thought, I'm not directly in favour of either culture.
I just don't think it's a good idea to promote promiscuity.

 

[514901]

woops, I meant single non-divorced women.



Nah, some chicks definitely don't like black guys. Kind of hard to be sexually attracted if you're basically racist.


On topic of marriage, the whole sexual revolution led to our super high 50% divorce rate. On the other hand, cultures with virgins brides (and usually virgin husbands) have like a 5% divorce rate? Just food for thought, I'm not directly in favour of either culture.
I just don't think it's a good idea to promote promiscuity.

Thats because those cultures have the threat of stoning/hanging/death if the women is not a virgin.

Capitalism (or more correctly in its current perverted form of corporatism), religion, and an increasing population is what led to the higher divorce rate, not the sexual revolution. There wasn't an issue when the Marquis de Sade was running things back in France and the Greeks of lore were engaging in lesbianism, amongst other sexual practices.

 

[Anastomoses]

Wow...that's a truly depressing outlook you have

Oh, are you just meeting qld?

Let me let you in on something--ALL women crave BBC

Bzzz. Wrong again, solipsist. How many times does it have to be told to you that your reality isn't everyone else's reality?

Studentpox...you are such a freak - what's wrong with your mother, I don't even know where to start. If a 24 yo thinks she's too young to be in a relationship, she probably is. Do you have the same problem with a 24 yo guy who feels he's too young to be in a relationship? Have single men in their 30's gotten damaged from partying too much? Stop being such a misogynistic pigface.

 

[Stellar Clouds]

Oh, are you just meeting qld?

Haha I guess so

 

[studentp0x]

Thats because those cultures have the threat of stoning/hanging/death if the women is not a virgin.

Capitalism (or more correctly in its current perverted form of corporatism), religion, and an increasing population is what led to the higher divorce rate, not the sexual revolution. There wasn't an issue when the Marquis de Sade was running things back in France and the Greeks of lore were engaging in lesbianism, amongst other sexual practices.

Nahh, you're thinking of villages and isolated parts of islamic countries and in total maybe 5% of those cultures populations. That's an estimate in your favour, in reality only 2-3% of those cultures would go to such measures.

It's largely cultural value. And men and women in those cultures can certainly divorce, (men very easily) but yet the divorce rate remains so low.

And the sexual revolutions in the 70s/80s... along with changed divorce laws, DIRECTLY led to spiked divorce rates. The timeline is not a coincidence.

Oh, are you just meeting qld?



Bzzz. Wrong again, nutjob.

Studentpox...you are such a freak - what's wrong with your mother, I don't even know where to start. If a 24 yo thinks she's too young to be in a relationship, she probably is. Do you have the same problem with a 24 yo guy who feels he's too young to be in a relationship? Have single men in their 30's gotten damaged from partying too much? Stop being such a misogynistic pigface.

No I just said it's not very respectful of someone who HAS a long term boyfriend to tell another guy that they want to be getting banged by random guys every weekend.

Would you like it if your girlfriend was telling another guy that?

 

[514901]

Nahh, you're thinking of villages and isolated parts of islamic countries and in total maybe 5% of those cultures populations. That's an estimate in your favour, in reality only 2-3% of those cultures would go to such measures.

It's largely cultural value. And men and women in those cultures can certainly divorce, (men very easily) but yet the divorce rate remains so low.

And the sexual revolutions in the 70s/80s... along with changed divorce laws, DIRECTLY led to spiked divorce rates. The timeline is not a coincidence.





No I just said it's not very respectful of someone who HAS a long term boyfriend to tell another guy that they want to be getting banged by random guys every weekend.

Would you like it if your girlfriend was telling another guy that?

You don't think it had anything to do with Americans/the first world enjoying unprecedented financial success and comforts the planet could not dream of just a decade earlier?

People have been having sex with multiple partners for thousands of years and their livelihood and the livelihood of their clan depended upon it. It's only because of religion over the past 2,000 years that man has tried to re-wire his mind, and the consequences have been disastrous.

 

[CDI]

Thats because those cultures have the threat of stoning/hanging/death if the women is not a virgin.

Well, you're talking about one 'culture' in particular. Others just happened to have their kids get married at a younger age, so the chances of them being virgin are higher either way. They tend to stick together cause that's what they're taught. They don't get brain washed by the 'culture which has no culture', which is built on 'love' aka 50% divorce rates.

 

[CDI]

Yeah, I can't really argue with this, but there are a number of women out there in their 30s who simply didn't want marriage, etc. and have a good head on their shoulders and never really had big party days. It's not terribly common but they are out there.

There are women who wanted marriage all along and then there are women who "never wanted marriage all along"...once they hit 30.

 

[studentp0x]

You don't think it had anything to do with Americans/the first world enjoying unprecedented financial success and comforts the planet could not dream of just a decade earlier?

People have been having sex with multiple partners for thousands of years and their livelihood and the livelihood of their clan depended upon it. It's only because of religion over the past 2,000 years that man has tried to re-wire his mind, and the consequences have been disastrous.

Well there's a strong difference in creating a hypersexual world and promoting promiscuity and saying there's nothing wrong with having 15..20..30..50 partners. That's different than having a few partners.
If you read some forums where women share their sexual adventures with others (whilst being married), you'll change your mind on a lot of what you're saying (or thinking).

 

[CDI]

No I just said it's not very respectful of someone who HAS a long term boyfriend to tell another guy that they want to be getting banged by random guys every weekend.

Would you like it if your girlfriend was telling another guy that?

Anasto is into girls?

Pics.

 

[studentp0x]

Well, you're talking about one 'culture' in particular. Others just happened to have their kids get married at a younger age, so the chances of them being virgin are higher either way. They tend to stick together cause that's what they're taught. They don't get brain washed by the 'culture which has no culture', which is built on 'love' aka 50% divorce rates.

Would have to agree with this. I mean cmon, the extreme divorce rates have caused so much damage to families-kids... it has consequences which are visible in society.

 

[514901]

Well there's a strong difference in creating a hypersexual world and promoting promiscuity and saying there's nothing wrong with having 15..20..30..50 partners. That's different than having a few partners.
If you read some forums where women share their sexual adventures with others (whilst being married), you'll change your mind on a lot of what you're saying (or thinking).

I'm in my 30s, have been with a pretty fair number of women, and have read a large number of historical texts/history/literature...I don't see anything wrong with a woman who enjoys sex. As I stated earlier, I'd much rather have a promiscuous women with a good personality than a dainty, mundane woman who is always in a relationship and is boring.

 

[CDI]

I'm in my 30s, have been with a pretty fair number of women, and have read a large number of historical texts/history/literature...I don't see anything wrong with a woman who enjoys sex. As I stated earlier, I'd much rather have a promiscuous women with a good personality than a dainty, mundane woman who is always in a relationship and is boring.

Dem herps.

The brothel is that way. -->

 

[studentp0x]

I'm in my 30s, have been with a pretty fair number of women, and have read a large number of historical texts/history/literature...I don't see anything wrong with a woman who enjoys sex. As I stated earlier, I'd much rather have a promiscuous women with a good personality than a dainty, mundane woman who is always in a relationship and is boring.

Yea cause the only way to enjoy sex frequently is to do it with different men all the time. (lol the best sex I've had by far has been with my gf, and it took a year to progress to this stage, the few casual partners I've had were beyond terrible experiences).

Anyway, http://socialpathology.blogspot.ca/2010/09/sexual-partner-divorce-risk.html

Relevant for your future ^

Don't be surprised when you find out your wife is still promiscuous (which you'll find out with dem herp sores showing up one day when you're in the shower).

 

[tantacles]

Yea cause the only way to enjoy sex frequently is to do it with different men all the time. (lol the best sex I've had by far has been with my gf, and it took a year to progress to this stage, the few casual partners I've had were beyond terrible experiences).

Anyway, http://socialpathology.blogspot.ca/2010/09/sexual-partner-divorce-risk.html

Relevant for your future ^

Don't be surprised when you find out your wife is still promiscuous (which you'll find out with dem herp sores showing up one day when you're in the shower).

I think you might be suffering from YMMV syndrome.

Women were promiscuous long before the sexual revolution; it's just that before the sexual revolution, they had to hide it from a society that demanded virginity (while men's promiscuity was largely accepted). I think your whole argument is hinging on a flawed assumption, namely that people as a whole have changed. In fact, people's desires haven't changed at all. People now (and this point is debatable given the nature of culture, especially outside of this country) just have more freedom to act upon their actual desires and be open about them. And this freedom will continue to expand and is a great thing because it means that, hopefully, fewer people will feel obligated to remain trapped in abusive, loveless, and/or boring marriages.

Frankly, I don't see the high divorce rate as diagnostic of promiscuity; rather, I see it as more indicative of proactiveness to improve one's own life circumstances. I'd rather have a 50% divorce rate with 10% unhappy marriages than a 0% divorce rate with 20% happy marriages.

And don't knock all casual sexual encounters just because they didn't work out for you. Plenty of people have casual sexual encounters that are rewarding and safe, and it's our (wait. My. You're still a pre-med, right?) job as future health professionals to support whatever healthy lifestyle choices our patients (and colleagues. And friends) make.

 

[514901]

Raise your hand if you like to creampie. Because I sure love to do it.

 

[medstud104]

As a female medical student in her 2nd year, in her early 20s, and observing most of the class becoming either married, engaged, in long term relationships, or pairing up...I am beginning to feel that I may be forever alone and eventually die alone.

I mean I'm not ugly or anything. Seriously. Or obese. Or even fat. Or even unattractive. I dress well, eat well, groom well, exercise, and in general, take care of myself. But I feel, every day, I am getting older and older...and that's not stopping any time soon?

Any other students single and feeling like the odd man out? I've been single for 2 years and seems like that trend will continue. I mean, I don't even want a boyfriend or want to be tied up. But it just feels odd to be single in a pool of pairs.

Med school just sucks in the dating scene.

I guess we can all die alone. Together.

(and no, I am not depressed in any sense.)

The rant of the day. And my very first post.

A female has it so hard???

I assure you, I have no Idea what your talking about.

 

[Mornhavon]

.

 

[medstud104]

Sure are a lot of unrepentant sluts ITT.

Just a reminder that women that like to play the field are not marriage material.

That is common knowledge.

They have "oats" to sow. Haha. As if that makes sense.

 

[EMDO2018]

Winged scapula, advice on how to attract older women please

 

[Winged Scapula]

Winged scapula, advice on how to attract older women please

Send pics.

 

[Winged Scapula]

hahahahhahaha what? It's not that hard to get your fat ass onto a soccer field and run a few miles a day.

This has less to do with financial resources and more to do with emotional maturity and the realization that there's more out there in life than the notion of relationships and constant approval that consume most women in their 20s

But isn't that the point?

Many young women don't do that, perhaps assuming that their young metabolism will always be kind to them.

I would venture that older women have both the emotional maturity to worry less about pleasing others, more about pleasing themselves as well as the financial stability to afford things that improve their appearance outside of diet and exercise.

 

[medstud104]

But isn't that the point?

Many young women don't do that, perhaps assuming that their young metabolism will always be kind to them.

I would venture that older women have both the emotional maturity to worry less about pleasing others, more about pleasing themselves as well as the financial stability to afford things that improve their appearance outside of diet and exercise.

Workout. Males and females, it is attractive. And healthy,

 

[studentp0x]

I think you might be suffering from YMMV syndrome.

Women were promiscuous long before the sexual revolution; it's just that before the sexual revolution, they had to hide it from a society that demanded virginity (while men's promiscuity was largely accepted). I think your whole argument is hinging on a flawed assumption, namely that people as a whole have changed. In fact, people's desires haven't changed at all. People now (and this point is debatable given the nature of culture, especially outside of this country) just have more freedom to act upon their actual desires and be open about them. And this freedom will continue to expand and is a great thing because it means that, hopefully, fewer people will feel obligated to remain trapped in abusive, loveless, and/or boring marriages.

Frankly, I don't see the high divorce rate as diagnostic of promiscuity; rather, I see it as more indicative of proactiveness to improve one's own life circumstances. I'd rather have a 50% divorce rate with 10% unhappy marriages than a 0% divorce rate with 20% happy marriages.

And don't knock all casual sexual encounters just because they didn't work out for you. Plenty of people have casual sexual encounters that are rewarding and safe, and it's our (wait. My. You're still a pre-med, right?) job as future health professionals to support whatever healthy lifestyle choices our patients (and colleagues. And friends) make.

1) Of course human sexual desire hasn't changed. The level of promiscuity certainly has. There's a difference between sleeping with 5 guys and 20 guys... big difference. The former won't label you as anything, the latter will label you as a slut among girls and guys.

2) Yea of course.. cause KIDS don't matter at all do they? It's all about the the individual being happy in the marriage, the 3 kids he/she brought into this world don't matter at all. That's the issue with divorce. Break ups happen, of course. But when you cause kids issues, then there's a problem. Not to mention very often men get punished financially (alimony) along with years of endless stress for both sides. People shouldn't marry let alone have kids, if they see a possibility of divorce. How about that?

3) lol ya my ass... sex with a condom (necessary for casual sex, NOT needed for relationships - we haven't used it a single time over 14 months and she's not on birth control ) = would rather jerk off (who even feels anything, seriously ?). As for girls, chances are he's finishing in 3 minutes anyway. Now when you actually know what the other person likes, which takes time to figure out, then the sex gets good. If you don't agree, chances are you've barely ever had sex.

4) And yea it is.. but by definition, someone with more partners will be more likely to have more unprotected sex than someone with less. (going by number of people) Reasons vary from alcohol and drug use which can significantly decrease odds of condom usage to simple carelessness. And as odds, odds of STD transmission of course go up with that.

Sure are a lot of unrepentant sluts ITT.

Just a reminder that women that like to play the field are not marriage material.

But.. I thought it's fine if your potential wife has had a 80 guy bukka*ke and 12 different sports teams have run trains on her. How dare anyone get grossed out by that.

 

[Anastomoses]

Anasto is into girls?

Pics.

 

[CDI]

 

[jakeislove]

They'll be fine when they get into residency. They don't really need game. They'll get more proposals than they'll know what to do with.

In the meantime they'll prolly go to AAPI MSRF events or something.

The chicks are on a dating website where people (of the right social status and religion) try to hook up, LOL!

It's hilarious!

I'm in a solid, long-term relationship but do feel single people have a slight advantage in medical school.

 

[ruralsurg4now]

Let me let you in on something--ALL women crave BBC

Is that something you like to tell yourself at night?

 

[CDI]

The chicks are on a dating website where people (of the right social status and religion) try to hook up, LOL!

It's hilarious!

I'm in a solid, long-term relationship but do feel single people have a slight advantage in medical school.

Shaadi.com or Match.com

 

[fancymylotus]

Shaadi.com or Match.com

....CDI i KNEW you were on shaadi.com. you seem the type.

 

[Porfirio]

All young women have problems, and as they age it is about damage control of those problems (i.e. failed marriages, kids, herpes, terrible career choices, not taking care of their body, and failing to realize they are not special nor the center of the universe).

The same is true for young men.

Older does not mean better - I have been there, done that, and they still have problems.

 

[studentp0x]

All young women have problems, and as they age it is about damage control of those problems (i.e. failed marriages, kids, herpes, terrible career choices, not taking care of their body, and failing to realize they are not special nor the center of the universe).

The same is true for young men.

Older does not mean better - I have been there, done that, and they still have problems.

I lold at the herp

 

[tantacles]

1) Of course human sexual desire hasn't changed. The level of promiscuity certainly has. There's a difference between sleeping with 5 guys and 20 guys... big difference. The former won't label you as anything, the latter will label you as a slut among girls and guys.

That's because the labelers suck, not the labelees. You have very little idea how many people women are sleeping with. It's likely that your only source is national averages if you've even consulted those at all (and those averages don't indicate that most people are sleeping with 20 partners in their LIFETIMES, let alone up until their 20's). Even if you asked, do you think you would get a real answer? You probably wouldn't because people like you continue to label people who have frequent sex with multiple partners as sluts.

And with regard to the past, we don't have any idea how many sexual partners were normal historically. Did people get married and stay married? Yes, most of the time. Did people have pieces on the side? Yes, there's been some evidence of that. Do we know HOW MANY pieces? No. So those kinds of assumptions are somewhat ridiculous.

2) Yea of course.. cause KIDS don't matter at all do they? It's all about the the individual being happy in the marriage, the 3 kids he/she brought into this world don't matter at all. That's the issue with divorce. Break ups happen, of course. But when you cause kids issues, then there's a problem. Not to mention very often men get punished financially (alimony) along with years of endless stress for both sides. People shouldn't marry let alone have kids, if they see a possibility of divorce. How about that?

I'm baffled by the notion that you think children will be happier living with parents in an unhealthy marriage than with two parents who are healthily and happily separated. Care to weigh in?

Also, we're not only talking about couples with children. Do you think those couples should stay married?

And with regard to alimony, men only get punished if their incomes are greater than their wives' incomes. Thus, alimony is really just a result of our society's encouraging women to get married and have children instead of working.

3) lol ya my ass... sex with a condom (necessary for casual sex, NOT needed for relationships - we haven't used it a single time over 14 months and she's not on birth control ) = would rather jerk off (who even feels anything, seriously ?). As for girls, chances are he's finishing in 3 minutes anyway. Now when you actually know what the other person likes, which takes time to figure out, then the sex gets good. If you don't agree, chances are you've barely ever had sex.

Again, still baffled by the notion that you ascribe your sexual experience to everyone else.

4) And yea it is.. but by definition, someone with more partners will be more likely to have more unprotected sex than someone with less. (going by number of people) Reasons vary from alcohol and drug use which can significantly decrease odds of condom usage to simple carelessness. And as odds, odds of STD transmission of course go up with that.

If we're talking about alcohol and drug use, fine. But we're not. We're talking solely about people having sex with multiple partners, and you're conflating drugs and sex, two things which are not intrinsically related. Yes, if people take drugs, they're more likely to have unprotected sex.

But.. I thought it's fine if your potential wife has had a 80 guy bukka*ke and 12 different sports teams have run trains on her. How dare anyone get grossed out by that.

Are you equally grossed out by men having multiple sexual partners? If you are, then that's fine. You can seek people out who fit your standard of an appropriate partner and you'll hopefully uphold those same standards yourself. If not, think a little harder.

 

[studentp0x]

That's because the labelers suck, not the labelees. You have very little idea how many people women are sleeping with. It's likely that your only source is national averages if you've even consulted those at all (and those averages don't indicate that most people are sleeping with 20 partners in their LIFETIMES, let alone up until their 20's). Even if you asked, do you think you would get a real answer? You probably wouldn't because people like you continue to label people who have frequent sex with multiple partners as sluts.

No I don't have very little idea. You clearly must never have been in a big social circle, let alone multiple ones. The reason a lot of girls don't get kill counts of over 20 is cause they get into long term relationships from younger ages.
If you seriously think ones who stay single most of the time into their 20s don't have well over 20 partners...

A men's health magazine a couple years back did an anonymous poll for women over 30 and found 60% of them have had over 20+ sex partners (keep in mind that's full sexual intercourse, not including other stuff).

And with regard to the past, we don't have any idea how many sexual partners were normal historically. Did people get married and stay married? Yes, most of the time. Did people have pieces on the side? Yes, there's been some evidence of that. Do we know HOW MANY pieces? No. So those kinds of assumptions are somewhat ridiculous.

Of course we can't know how many people had in the past.

I'm baffled by the notion that you think children will be happier living with parents in an unhealthy marriage than with two parents who are healthily and happily separated. Care to weigh in?

Also, we're not only talking about couples with children. Do you think those couples should stay married?

Couples without children who aren't happy should break up if they can fix their issues or if it isn't a phase that'll pass.

And what do you define as an unhealthy marriage for kids? I don't see why indian or muslim kids have "issues" due to their parents being unhappy together in therr arranged marriage. Are you suggesting such kids have major problems?

In contrast to girls who develop daddy issues cause their mom brings home a different guy every month (actually have had a couple girls tell me that bothered them) or guys who grow up without a constant father figure in their life.

And with regard to alimony, men only get punished if their incomes are greater than their wives' incomes. Thus, alimony is really just a result of our society's encouraging women to get married and have children instead of working.

It's stupid to divide total income by half.
But there's nothing wrong with what society encourages. If you have kids, you need to raise them. What happens when you have a 17 year old son and 15 year old daughter, and you're at work 8am till 7pm at night? Chances are your daughter's hanging out with swag-***s and blowing some of them here and there, and your son's smoking pot with his bros.

Again, still baffled by the notion that you ascribe your sexual experience to everyone else.

Well for 1) It's very common to hear guys say condom use kills the pleasure and 2) how can you have maximum pleasure when you don't even know what the other person likes?

These are typical things, not limited to me.

If we're talking about alcohol and drug use, fine. But we're not. We're talking solely about people having sex with multiple partners, and you're conflating drugs and sex, two things which are not intrinsically related. Yes, if people take drugs, they're more likely to have unprotected sex.

Yea cause I'm sure people remain celibate at parties.. clubs.. bars. You kill me with how naive you are.

I don't really know any girls who have had casual sex all sober aside from ones with friends with benefits type of things. All girls have told me that if they weren't drunk, they'd never do a lot of things and/or even have casual sex.
If you don't think there's a major correlation between the two, you have no experience in this matter.

Are you equally grossed out by men having multiple sexual partners? If you are, then that's fine. You can seek people out who fit your standard of an appropriate partner and you'll hopefully uphold those same standards yourself. If not, think a little harder.

4.5..6..partners.. nothing wrong. Beyond that, I don't hold double standards.

 

[tantacles]

No I don't have very little idea. You clearly must never have been in a big social circle, let alone multiple ones. The reason a lot of girls don't get kill counts of over 20 is cause they get into long term relationships from younger ages.
If you seriously think ones who stay single most of the time into their 20s don't have well over 20 partners...

A men's health magazine a couple years back did an anonymous poll for women over 30 and found 60% of them have had over 20+ sex partners (keep in mind that's full sexual intercourse, not including other stuff).

So you're using a men's magazine as an academic source for how many sex partners women have?

Of course we can't know how many people had in the past.

Then why are you insisting that promiscuity has increased?

Couples without children who aren't happy should break up if they can fix their issues or if it isn't a phase that'll pass.

And what do you define as an unhealthy marriage for kids? I don't see why indian or muslim kids have "issues" due to their parents being unhappy together in therr arranged marriage. Are you suggesting such kids have major problems?

In contrast to girls who develop daddy issues cause their mom brings home a different guy every month (actually have had a couple girls tell me that bothered them) or guys who grow up without a constant father figure in their life.

It's not particularly important how I define it. Two people who aren't happy are likely to pass that unhappiness on to some extent. Staying married does not preclude your children from having problems that are related to your marriage, but divorce can alleviate those problems.

It's stupid to divide total income by half.
But there's nothing wrong with what society encourages. If you have kids, you need to raise them. What happens when you have a 17 year old son and 15 year old daughter, and you're at work 8am till 7pm at night? Chances are your daughter's hanging out with swag-***s and blowing some of them here and there, and your son's smoking pot with his bros.

Is it stupid that a woman who spent her time raising her and her husband's children instead of working should get some of her husband's income should they divorce? The caretaker of the children often has to give up a career to do so while the other spouse remains financially fit. Alimony is a reflection of that and an attempt at amelioration of that. It's unfortunate that it affects all couples equally, even those without children, but it's absolutely fantastic that it exists.

Well for 1) It's very common to hear guys say condom use kills the pleasure and 2) how can you have maximum pleasure when you don't even know what the other person likes?

These are typical things, not limited to me.

But you're ascribing them to everyone. If your experience were universal, people would never have casual sex.

Yea cause I'm sure people remain celibate at parties.. clubs.. bars. You kill me with how naive you are.

Again, I'm not talking about people who abuse alcohol and do drugs, and I'm not saying anything about their level of promiscuity. You're conflating alcohol/drugs and sex, and your argument assumes that everyone who has had 20+ partners had that many partners because of drug or alcohol use, which is patently ridiculous.

I don't really know any girls who have had casual sex all sober aside from ones with friends with benefits type of things. All girls have told me that if they weren't drunk, they'd never do a lot of things and/or even have casual sex.
If you don't think there's a major correlation between the two, you have no experience in this matter.

I know plenty. Again, your small sample of girls is not representative of the population of a whole, nor is mine, which is why I'm encouraging you to reconsider this assumption.

4.5..6..partners.. nothing wrong. Beyond that, I don't hold double standards.

So what double standard do you hold below 6 partners? Do you understand what a double standard is? It's when a party has one standard for one group (say, women) but doesn't hold another similar group (say, men) to that same standard.

 

[studentp0x]

So you're using a men's magazine as an academic source for how many sex partners women have?

So a poll is not satisfactory, but you need an academic source? How then do we predict election results from calling 2000 people from around the country? You're talking about promiscuous women, and I'm saying such women have A LOT of partners by definition .Otherwise they are not promiscuous. Not hard to understand.

Then why are you insisting that promiscuity has increased?

Getting married and staying married from an earlier age decreases promiscuity. Exposure to sexual content at a younger age can decrease the age of the onset of sexual activity.

These are things that have changed over time, same with standards in society.

It's not particularly important how I define it. Two people who aren't happy are likely to pass that unhappiness on to some extent. Staying married does not preclude your children from having problems that are related to your marriage, but divorce can alleviate those problems.

Dude by your definition, muslim and indian kids should be in mental hospitals from the psychological damage cause their parents don't have "happy and loving marriages."

What problems would children have that are related to the marriage? Or rather, what problems would they have that have them worse off than not having a father figure in therr life for example.

Is it stupid that a woman who spent her time raising her and her husband's children instead of working should get some of her husband's income should they divorce? The caretaker of the children often has to give up a career to do so while the other spouse remains financially fit. Alimony is a reflection of that and an attempt at amelioration of that. It's unfortunate that it affects all couples equally, even those without children, but it's absolutely fantastic that it exists.

You mean feeding them processed frozen foods and surfing ashley madison? Or sleeping in till noon? That definitely makes a good case for getting half your husband's hard earned income. It's lolzy that you think housewives nowadays do even half as much as they did before.

But you're ascribing them to everyone. If your experience were universal, people would never have casual sex.

It's called sexual frustration. To alleviate it, you need to have sex. That doesn't mean you had good quality sex however.

Again, I'm not talking about people who abuse alcohol and do drugs, and I'm not saying anything about their level of promiscuity. You're conflating alcohol/drugs and sex, and your argument assumes that everyone who has had 20+ partners had that many partners because of drug or alcohol use, which is patently ridiculous.

I'm saying it's ridiculous if you think alcohol and drugs don't have an extremely strong strong correlation with casual sex. The chances of unprotected sex skyrockets when alcohol is involved, and is almost certain when more drugs are involved. you really need a study to show you that?

I know plenty. Again, your small sample of girls is not representative of the population of a whole, nor is mine, which is why I'm encouraging you to reconsider this assumption.

Women who sleep around are (rightfully) labelled as sluts and lose their "dating value" in the eyes of quality and loyal men. On a global level, this is taken to an extreme.

You're right in that women should be able to enjoy and have sex as much as men. You're beyond wrong in saying that relationships = boring, casual sex = fun.
Also, in making it seem like that having lots of partners is the only way to enjoy it.

So what double standard do you hold below 6 partners? Do you understand what a double standard is? It's when a party has one standard for one group (say, women) but doesn't hold another similar group (say, men) to that same standard.

I don't hold a double standard.

 

[tantacles]

So a poll is not satisfactory, but you need an academic source? How then do we predict election results from calling 2000 people from around the country? You're talking about promiscuous women, and I'm saying such women have A LOT of partners by definition .Otherwise they are not promiscuous. Not hard to understand.

You're using a poll that anonymously asks an unknown quantity of women from an unknown area using an unknown method as your metric.

Getting married and staying married from an earlier age decreases promiscuity. Exposure to sexual content at a younger age can decrease the age of the onset of sexual activity. These are things that have changed over time, same with standards in society.

If you have multiple pieces on the side, you're still being promiscuous. Marriage doesn't necessarily have an effect on that.

Dude by your definition, muslim and indian kids should be in mental hospitals from the psychological damage cause their parents don't have "happy and loving marriages."

What problems would children have that are related to the marriage? Or rather, what problems would they have that have them worse off than not having a father figure in therr life for example.

Divorce does not necessarily equate with losing contact with either parent, nor does marriage necessarily mean both people are in the picture. Your very own example was of people working too much to see their children, which would mean that married couples run a risk of having an absentee parent.

You mean feeding them processed frozen foods and surfing ashley madison? Or sleeping in till noon? That definitely makes a good case for getting half your husband's hard earned income. It's lolzy that you think housewives nowadays do even half as much as they did before.

It doesn't matter how much they need to do; it matters that sacrificing a career is the result of being a stay-at-home parent.

It's called sexual frustration. To alleviate it, you need to have sex. That doesn't mean you had good quality sex however.

I'm going to say it again, but a different way: Many people have gratifying sexual experiences outside of monogamous relationships, and your experience is not universal.

I'm saying it's ridiculous if you think alcohol and drugs don't have an extremely strong strong correlation with casual sex. The chances of unprotected sex skyrockets when alcohol is involved, and is almost certain when more drugs are involved. you really need a study to show you that?

You're missing the crux of the argument, which is not that drugs and alcohol can be a contributing factor in specific casual sexual encounters. Everybody knows that, and I'm not trying to eliminate that argument. Rather, there is a rather sizable subset of people who enjoy casual sex without being under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Your assumptions completely ignore these people and make a broad generalization about every single person (though mainly women, which is another issue) who has casual sex.

Women who sleep around are (rightfully) labelled as sluts and lose their "dating value" in the eyes of quality and loyal men. On a global level, this is taken to an extreme.

Those men aren't men of quality. Those men might prefer not to date such a woman, but a quality man would never call anyone a slut or a *****. A quality man would acknowledge his own preferences, date someone who fit his own requirements, and move along with his life without insisting that people who have had particular numbers of sexual partners are less valuable sexual or relationship partners for every single person on the earth.

You're right in that women should be able to enjoy and have sex as much as men. You're beyond wrong in saying that relationships = boring, casual sex = fun.

Nowhere did I make that argument. My argument is that some people prefer casual sexual encounters to sexual encounters in monogamous relationships.

Also, in making it seem like that having lots of partners is the only way to enjoy it.

I didn't make that argument at all either. SOME people enjoy casual sex more than sex within a relationship. SOME people enjoy casual sex when they're not under the influence of alcohol or drugs.

Similarly, SOME people have casual sex while under the influence of drugs or alcohol. SOME people insist that they would never have casual sex if not under the influence. SOME people tell the truth about how many partners they've had. SOME people responded to a survey about sexual activity in a men's magazine.

Reconsider your stances, and don't be judgmental towards people who have different sexual preferences than you do. Feel free to counsel on safety, but not on morality.

 

[CDI]

....CDI i KNEW you were on shaadi.com. you seem the type.

I told my girl I'm joining... or putting her on it when she annoys me.

 

[fancymylotus]

I told my girl I'm joining... or putting her on it when she annoys me.

Hahaha. You better give her a ring. And fast! My mom told me if I keep bringing the ring up to my SO, he's gonna give me a ring pop.

 

[studentp0x]

You're using a poll that anonymously asks an unknown quantity of women from an unknown area using an unknown method as your metric.

And the results are consistent with what is seen in society by everyone. Not everything needs a study.

If you have multiple pieces on the side, you're still being promiscuous. Marriage doesn't necessarily have an effect on that.

Who aside from rich men had "multiple pieces" on the side? What time period are you talking about?

Divorce does not necessarily equate with losing contact with either parent, nor does marriage necessarily mean both people are in the picture. Your very own example was of people working too much to see their children, which would mean that married couples run a risk of having an absentee parent.

lol... a 10 year old girl seeing her mom's new boyfriend every month and developing daddy issues cause she sees him as a fatherly figure. No problem with that right.
Divorce means you're basically going to barely ever see one parent. On paper it looks like a weekend-weekdays split, in theory he/she isn't seeing her dad every weekend.
If you're promoting divorce and saying a 50% divorce rate is nothing, then I don't have much more to say.

Wanna know what the issue is? People never suggest resolving an issue. Whenever someone posts for advice on forums regarding relationship advice, half the responses (at least) always say something along the lines of 'break up" rather than suggesting solutions to fix the problem. People love to take the easy way out.

It doesn't matter how much they need to do; it matters that sacrificing a career is the result of being a stay-at-home parent.

hmm? I was saying said stay-at-home parents are not doing a great job of being a parent more often than not. Sending your kids to school with processed cold cut meats or giving them money to buy lunch.. and feeding them processed food for dinner, not doing all of the house work.. doesn't qualify you for a 50-50 alimony split.

I'm going to say it again, but a different way: Many people have gratifying sexual experiences outside of monogamous relationships, and your experience is not universal.

Do you have proof that many people have gratifying sexual experiences during one night stands? (I'm not sure if you understood my point correctly, I was more so arguing one night stands vs. the entirety of relationships/friends with benefits/f***buddies...)

You're missing the crux of the argument, which is not that drugs and alcohol can be a contributing factor in specific casual sexual encounters. Everybody knows that, and I'm not trying to eliminate that argument. Rather, there is a rather sizable subset of people who enjoy casual sex without being under the influence of alcohol or drugs. Your assumptions completely ignore these people and make a broad generalization about every single person (though mainly women, which is another issue) who has casual sex.

Refer to my brackets above, it isn't common to have one night stands while sober.

Those men aren't men of quality. Those men might prefer not to date such a woman, but a quality man would never call anyone a slut or a *****. A quality man would acknowledge his own preferences, date someone who fit his own requirements, and move along with his life without insisting that people who have had particular numbers of sexual partners are less valuable sexual or relationship partners for every single person on the earth.

Lol... that was the most beta paragraph I've read in a while, at least the first 2 lines. You should date some of these chicks you support and back up, report back on how it turns out.
Also, for every guy that calls a girl a ***** or a slut, there's 5 girls that call guys "creepy" or "*******s"
Why the double standard?

 

[Mornhavon]

.

 

[Prince090]

"MMMmmmmmm I love the thought of french kissing a girl whose sucked ten d****s...truly a privilege."

-Quality Man

 

[CDI]

Hahaha. You better give her a ring. And fast! My mom told me if I keep bringing the ring up to my SO, he's gonna give me a ring pop.

I actually just bought the ring last week.