When my dad went to counseling, it did nothing for him. He's still depressed all day long making everyones life miserable. When my mom went to counseling, she still had psychological issues. "Counseling" doesn't do anything unless the problem is removed. My problem is my lack of independence and freedom to be myself and that could be removed if I went to med school. From the time I was a baby, it seemed my dad did not approve of any kind of happiness or fun. My mom thought it was okay to take away my freedom, make ridiculous rules, and make my life a misery when I didn't abide by them. I think you're making the assumption that these psychological issues are inherently part of my personality. For some people, it is. Not for me. I take on a different persona at home, but I really just want to be myself. I know what it's like to think normally, so I don't think I'm being the real me when I have these issues. Rather, I think there is a trigger. So therefore, I don't think these issues would cripple me in med school. On the contrary, I think they would go away and I could be the person I want to be.
I know what you are thinking. "He is saying he's going to change but not really. I've seen this many times before." However, I would throw caution to this way of thinking. This may not be the case with me. I just want to go out on my own and see if I can expel some of my demons if I am indeed allowed to be myself, instead of chronically suppressing my true personality and character. Its not fair I just want to be myself!!!! But i cant.
But I am secretly honored that the great Goro replied to my thread! But it's still doesn't help my problem. Thanks anyway for reaching out to me. Btw I come from an extremely religious conservative traditional family where fun and freedom is basically death.