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- Mar 5, 2007
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A semester as a hospital volunteer, and already, I've had my eyes opened to the ways of EM...
If you're old and whiney, and you keep loudly moaning and crying for help whenever someone (usually another pt's family) walks by, and there really isn't much wrong with you other than you're old and whiney, then guess what?? You win yourself a Foley! And the nurses aren't going to be gentle, either. In fact...they're going to snicker at you afterwards, when you actually have a reason to be complaining that it hurts.
If you were just stung by a bee on the mouth at your 9-year-old son's football game and are having a really spectacular allergic reaction, feel free to hit him upside the head when he repeatedly tells you that you're being silly. We certainly won't tell you on you. After all, it's no big deal if your throat starts swelling shut....it's not like you need it to breathe or anything!
I also learned that if you were very drunk and experiencing the unpleasant experience of returning to very sobor, it's perfectly ok to repeatedly defecate all over yourself! It makes everyone's day that much better, especially the techs'.
If someone is talking so quietly that you have to lean in to about 3" away from them to hear them, and you have to keep asking them to repeat what they're saying, you probably don't want to know.
And finally...it's not much of a crash cart without a defib, is it?
If you're old and whiney, and you keep loudly moaning and crying for help whenever someone (usually another pt's family) walks by, and there really isn't much wrong with you other than you're old and whiney, then guess what?? You win yourself a Foley! And the nurses aren't going to be gentle, either. In fact...they're going to snicker at you afterwards, when you actually have a reason to be complaining that it hurts.
If you were just stung by a bee on the mouth at your 9-year-old son's football game and are having a really spectacular allergic reaction, feel free to hit him upside the head when he repeatedly tells you that you're being silly. We certainly won't tell you on you. After all, it's no big deal if your throat starts swelling shut....it's not like you need it to breathe or anything!
I also learned that if you were very drunk and experiencing the unpleasant experience of returning to very sobor, it's perfectly ok to repeatedly defecate all over yourself! It makes everyone's day that much better, especially the techs'.
If someone is talking so quietly that you have to lean in to about 3" away from them to hear them, and you have to keep asking them to repeat what they're saying, you probably don't want to know.
And finally...it's not much of a crash cart without a defib, is it?