Dude - in a word -" 'murica".If you are a 32 year old man with pharyngitis the best way to treat it is to show up at the ER at 2:40 in the morning . When asked what have you done to treat it say without batting an eye "nothing" and rate your pain 6/10. This will cause the attending to come over and ask you how did you make it to age 32.
After the end of the shift I will be able to laugh for hours thinking about your monolithic stupidity.
You find singular something that is legion and quotidian he in the ol' US of A.