Pardon us, we just have our futures, hopes, dreams and possibly thousands of dollars for another application cycle on the line. 🙁 I do totally get what you're saying though.
@attemptedintrepid, it does matter so much to us, and I've suffered some wounds myself. I think though, that too much communication really is counterproductive in most cases (counterproductive or futile. . . I am basing this speculation on hearsay from people who have served as adcoms.)
You're on the freeway and already late for something important. There's unbelievable congestion. Nothing is moving, and you can't even see why not--too many cars ahead of you, and stuck in all the other lanes. The arrow on the gas tank indicator is nearing E. It's hot and humid. Some people are trying to drive on the shoulders and other people are angling out to block them.
Whether you sit there sweating silently like a well-behaved citizen or express your frustration by leaning on the horn is unlikely to affect how soon the traffic jam is cleared. If honking prevents someone from doing something more irrational (abandoning the car, taking the tire iron to a neighboring vehicle), honking is the better option. Sometimes, though, it just reinforces the feeling of helpless irritation.
This metaphor may not work for you, but I think of it that way. I wrote in response to direct queries about whether I wished to remain on the waitlist, and, at one school, sent a brief update about a new, possibly significant, "achievement." Aside from that, I just fumed and worried. It's awful. Nothing really seems to help alleviate the anxiety, much as I wished that it would.
Just sending good thoughts and hopes your way. . .
